Poison & Wine - Chapter XLIII
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"So how are you doing, Andy?"
I looked over at Dr. Holmes. "Well, according to everyone I know, I look like a zombie, which says a lot, doesn't it?"
She pressed the glasses up her nose and her pen moved as she wrote something down. "I was informed you were applying to PSU."
"Yeah, I visited there with Klaus," I frowned as I thought about it. Only if I could go back to that. "I really liked it there, so…"
"I understand how you're feeling," She said after a moment. "My husband was in the Army."
"Oh, I'm-I'm sorry, Dr. Holmes," I sat forward with a frown. "I had no clue."
She shook her head, giving me a bittersweet smile. "Not everyone does, Andy. I just thought I'd tell you something I read in somewhere once: 'Death ends a life, not a relationship.'"
Great. Make it to where I don't want to move on even more so now than now. Thanks a lot, Dr. Holmes.
We finished our session – she tried getting me to talk about Klaus, but I wouldn't other than a mention every now and again – and I went to the waiting room to see Elijah waiting for me. He met me with a smile that warmed my heart.
He didn't return for me that night, but he eventually did return that next day. He said he had to make sure Kol was okay and that's what took him so long, I didn't question him any further. That entire day he was gone I just laid in my bed and cried. Last night we had stayed up all night watching movies and reading some of books. I was so glad he didn't make me go to sleep because I couldn't deal with the nightmares. I hadn't broken down again in front of him, but I would if I had fallen sleep again. This morning, he had offered to take me to my therapy session and I accepted.
But neither of us mentioned the kiss.
It was as if it didn't happen. I mean, I didn't bring it up because he didn't and I figured if he wanted to talk to me about it he could. I was dying to know what he thought, though, because if I were being honest, I believed that Elijah and I could have something once I moved on from Klaus. "Ready?" I asked him as I walked over to him.
"Yes," He nodded. We started heading out of the building. "Perhaps you should change before we go to the memorial."
I glanced down at my jeans and baggy shirt. "Yeah, I probably should," I laughed as I thought about showing up in this attire, but soon stopped thinking that it was disrespectful to do that.
The memorial was for the council members who had died in a fire on Pastor Young's cattle ranch the night he had tried to kill all the vampires in town. It was said that there was a faulty gas line in the kitchen. I was just glad Sheriff Forbes and Carol weren't there. Also that the rest of us had escaped before that happened that night.
We got to my house and Elijah waited downstairs while I changed into a modest black dress with black flats. My hair was pulled back into a bun with a few strands falling beside my face. I didn't bother with makeup because I was going to this to mourn over these people, not to look pretty. When I came back downstairs, Elijah was waiting for me by the door with a black, velvet coat for me. We headed out.
In silence we rode to the church. I didn't feel like talking and it seemed he didn't either. He helped me get out of the car once we got there and put my coat on me before surprising me by slipping his arm around my waist. I think he wanted to show me he was here for me. I leaned against him and was relieved at his presence.
As we walk down the pathway with other guests, I noticed Elena and Damon walking across the grounds. They seemed like they were arguing before they went behind a tree together. Didn't she pick Stefan?
Elijah and I stopped walking and watched as Damon handed her a blood bag. She took it and ripped the top open, beginning to drink it. A nauseous expression crossed her face before she spat the blood out. Damon took the bag back from her and wiped the blood off of Elena's chin. They argued back and forth for a moment – during which he grabbed her by the shoulders – before he gently caressed her face. It didn't last long because the church bells rang, interrupting their conversation and indicating it was time to go inside.
Elena walked back towards the church, Elijah and I followed suit. "What was that about?" I murmured to him. "What was going on?"
"Her body seems to be rejecting the blood," He whispered back. "Damon suspects it has to do with her doppelgänger blood." I exhaled and moved closer to Elijah, not caring that my ribs were crying out in protest. I needed to be close to him.
We quietly entered in the church which was filled with people. We sat down a row front of Matt, Elena, and Jeremy. As we passed Elena, I noticed she was pale. Despite my anger for her, I mouthed, "Are you okay?"
She nodded to me. "I'm good," She mouthed back.
I turned back to the front and leaned on Elijah. "Can we have a funeral for Klaus, Elijah?" I asked, looking up at him.
He kept his head forward. "We'll see, Andrea."
I could tell something was wrong with him. Did I hurt him by asking that? "Elijah?"
He hardly glanced down at me. "Yes?"
"Never mind," I distanced myself from him, feeling that it was best at the moment. He looked emotionless and I hated that.
I looked back at the door and my heart suddenly stopped. How was this even possible? Was I seeing things? "No," I quickly hurried over to where Stefan and Caroline were. I grabbed the man's arm tightly and spun him toward me. "Tyler?"
Sure enough, it was Tyler.
Tears started filling my eyes. "But-but you're dead… Klaus died… how are you alive?" I started shaking uncontrollably and felt arms wrap around me. Tyler looked back at me, pain flashing through his eyes briefly.
Elijah leaned down to my ear and whispered, "I'll explain everything later, Andrea, just make it through the service." My head was spinning with possibilities. Hope filled me as I thought about the possibility that Klaus was alive. Why hadn't Elijah informed me of this sooner?
"What are you doing here, Tyler?" Stefan asked, and Elijah tried pulling me back to my seat but I refused to budge.
"Being sensitive to the community's loss," Tyler responded.
"With a hunter out to get you?" Stefan raised an eyebrow.
"I'm not letting a hunter stop me from where I'm supposed to be."
"Also, if he shows his face, I'm gonna kick his ass," Caroline said.
My breathing became ragged. "What's going on? What hunter?" I demanded as Elijah was finally successful in pulling me back to my seat. As I sat down, I realized something with horror. "You're hiding things from me, Elijah."
He didn't acknowledge that and I felt the tears slip down my cheeks finally. I looked back to see Stefan sitting three rows behind me. Elena noticed my tears and asked if I was okay. I didn't answer and instead faced forward. Elijah and I put a good half-foot in between us. How come we were so friendly earlier, but now it was like we were strangers? And why was the silence so deafening? I mean, I was fuming angry knowing that Elijah was hiding things from me. What was he hiding and why was he hiding it?
Carol walked up to the podium, preparing to start the memorial so I pushed it to the back of my mind and wiped my tears away quickly. I was still shaking, though.
Carol started addressing us. "Before we begin the Mass, we'd like to open the floor to anyone who would like to share a memory about our late friends on the Town Council. I know that April Young wanted to say a few words about her dad. April? April, are you still here, honey?"
Everyone glanced around for April Young, but she was nowhere to be found. I didn't even know she was here. Carol continued on anyways. "Is there anyone else who would like to share a recollection or a memory about Pastor Young?"
No one got up for a moment and I felt bad, but I was in no condition to go up there. "Come on up, Elena," Carol said, catching me off guard. I looked behind me to see Elena standing, looking an absolute mess. She proceeded to walk up to the podium.
I heard the church door open and turned to see Damon entering the church; Stefan, Tyler, and Caroline all turned to look at him as well. Damon dipped his hands in a bowl of holy water and touched his forehead, chest, and shoulders in the formation of a cross. He preceded to sit down next to Stefan, glanced at me for a moment, and then looked at Elena who had now made her way to the podium. I turned my attention back to her.
She was looking pretty bad up there. As she spoke, I felt myself cringe. "I, uh… When I talked to April earlier she was kind of nervous about coming up to speak. And now that I'm up here, I'm kind of nervous too." I leaned my arm over the bench to Jeremy. He instantly grabbed mine in his and squeezed. Elena grabbed tightly on to the sides of the podium. "The worst day of loving someone is the day that you lose them," She suddenly stopped, and nervously looked around. I saw Elijah stiffen slightly but refused to completely look over at him.
Elena started to breathe heavily. She was obviously struggling and it hurt me to see her like this. I'd go retrieve her from up there, but since I'm a human, it would probably only make her hunger worse.
"I, um…" She breathed in and out, but I noticed veins starting to crawl towards her eyes.
Stefan hurried up to the podium and wrapped his arm around her. "It's okay, it's okay. I got you, I got you," He said as he led her off the stage and back into the row next to Matt while the priest went over to the podium.
"Please turn to page forty two in your hymn book. Let us join together in a song," The Priest said and we all stood up and started singing.
"The blood. Stefan, the blood, I can smell it. There's so much," I barely hear Elena whisper. What blood? What was going on?
"It's alright; just remember what we talked about. Focus, push back, come on you can do this," Stefan responded.
I started to look around, but Elijah grabbed my wrist. I faintly heard him whisper, "Don't. It's a trap." What's a trap? Elena looking like she's about to pass out?
"What's wrong with her?" Matt whispered.
"She's hungry. She hasn't fed," Stefan whispered back.
"So, get her out of here."
"I can't. There's somebody watching us," Stefan said. So Elijah wasn't lying about that part. Stefan spoke again, "You do that, Damon, and you risk exposing all of us." Damon must have mentioned killing whoever was watching.
"Stefan, I'm losing it," Elena whispered weakly.
"Don't do it, Damon. Please," Stefan pleaded.
There was a short moment of silence when Matt burst out in a whisper, "Wait, wait, wait, wait. Elena, feed from me," I cringed at this, remembering when Elena fed from me. "It's okay, everyone will think you're upset. Just feed from me." Matt insisted. After a moment I heard him whisper, "It's okay. You'll be okay."
It was killing me not being able to see what was happening. Was Elena really feeding from Matt right now? I didn't hear any sign of protests from her, so she must have. After a long moment I hear her whisper, "Thank you," and assume she was thanking Matt for letting her feed from him.
It was then that I noticed Elijah's hand was still around my wrist and yanked it away from him. I looked away from everyone, seeing Tyler moving past Caroline and up the aisle. Caroline watched him, confused, and I joined with her on that.
"The blood," Elena almost whimpered. "I can still smell it. It's got to be April. We have to help her."
"Elena, we can't risk it," Stefan whispered.
"Then I'm gonna do it!" She snapped.
I assumed she was trying to push past Stefan, but I think she stopped when Tyler spoke from the podium. "Excuse me," He begun. "I just wanted to say a few words about Pastor Young."
"What do we do?" Elena whispered.
Everyone sat back down. Tyler continued to speak. "Back in first grade, I was a brat who couldn't be bothered with team sports. Didn't care much about anything that didn't affect me. But he was the one who made me understand how important it is to be part of a team; a community. Of giving yourself up for the sake of―" Tyler was cut off by the sound of a bullet and he dropped to the floor. Everybody started to scream, duck into the aisles, and rush out of the church.
I turned around for a moment to see Damon making his way out with the crowd while Caroline makes her way towards Tyler.
Elijah grabbed my hand and quickly yanked me toward the door but I pulled away from him. "I'm not leaving," I snapped before turning around and running to the podium where Carol, Caroline, and Elena were all gathered around Tyler.
"Oh, my God," Carol said.
Caroline got down next to Tyler and ripped the stake out of his chest. Stefan rushed onto the stage and stupid next to Elena. Tyler started coughing, but managed to get out, "I'm gonna kill that bastard."
"Damon's way ahead of you. Stay here, I have to help him," Stefan said and started to leave, but Elena grabbed his hand.
"What about April?" She asked.
"I got it. Go," Caroline said and Stefan rushed off.
"I have to call an ambulance," Carol said.
"No, he's fine," Caroline said as I was watching as Elena walked away. What was she doing? I slipped away from the remaining three and followed after her.
She sped up the balcony stairs so I ran up after her. "April!" I heard her call.
When I turned the corner, I could see part of her face was vamped out and then she rushed to April who was gagged and bleeding on the ground - she looked much different from the last time I saw her. Thankfully Caroline rushed up and stopped her before she could drink from April.
"She's not dead, but if you feed on her she will die!" Caroline said.
"Let go of me!" Elena growled, trying to fight Caroline to get to April.
"Look at her! Look at her, Elena!" Caroline shook her slightly. "It's April. April Young. She's not a warm body for you to feed on. She's your friend." I couldn't see Elena's face now, but I assumed it was back to normal because Caroline released her grip on her as she spoke again, "She's an orphan. Just like you. She's scared. Just like you were." Caroline bit into her wrist and went over to April. She took the gag off of her before feeding her blood.
April gasped as she looked over at Caroline and begun crying. "Please, don't hurt me. Please," She pleaded with Caroline.
"No one's gonna hurt you. No one's gonna hurt you," Caroline repeated before standing and turning to Elena. "She needs you. You can make her forget all of this."
"Why did he do this?" April cried.
"No, I-I can't, Caroline. You have to do it," Elena shook her head. They went back and forth for a moment on the subject before Elena finally agreed. Elena knelt by the panicking April and gently touched her shoulder. "April, listen to me," She said as the girl looked over at her. "Everything's gonna be okay. You're gonna get through it. Just like I did." To my dismay, she started to compel April, "I'm going to help you. I promise."
April said, "I'm gonna be okay. You're gonna help me."
Elena glanced back at Caroline and smiled before looking back at April. "You watched the funeral from up here so you could grieve alone. It was a beautiful service. People said really nice things."
April smiled and Elena looked back again, now noticing me. Giving her a disapproving look, I turned and walked away from them and went down the stairs. I headed out of the church and didn't get halfway across the lawn before I froze in my place.
Elijah's car was gone. He had left me.
Pulling out my phone, I quickly dialed his number. It immediately went to voicemail. "Elijah, where are you? Very classy of you to leave me with no ride. Least you made sure you were okay," I spat into my phone before hanging up.
"Andy!"
I sighed. I was not in the mood for all of this. Elena was just about to reach me when I turned around. "What, Elena? What can I help you with?"
"What's wrong?" She asked.
"Nothing, just leave me alone," I started to walk away.
"No, we're going to talk about this," She followed me. "We're not close anymore, Andy, and I hate that. We need to get back to where we were."
I quickly spun on my heels to face her. "I lost Klaus four days ago, Elena! I need to mourn, not repair our relationship! Our life has been one huge funeral, can I not mourn for once? God!" I wanted to rip my hair out and scream right now.
"I understand―"
"No, you don't, Elena, you don't understand what I'm going through!" I shouted at her. "I lost Alaric and Klaus! I thought I lost Tyler but evidently I didn't. You didn't lose Stefan or Damon, you don't get what I feel for Klaus because you don't know me anymore. We've not been close since our parents died, no matter what kind of facade we fabricated for the past year." I marched away from her then, holding my tears back.
Hours later of just sulking around the house – not one minute of those hours was I contacted by Elijah – I got a text from Stefan to meet him at school so I changed into grey jogging pants, a black tank top, and some Nike shoes. I was in pain from my ribs and didn't feel like wearing jeans.
As I pulled up, I noticed Damon and Bonnie walking toward the school. I parked and headed towards the school to see that our whole gang was here except for Tyler.
"Stefan, what are we doing?" Damon asked as I drew closer. I stopped next to Bonnie and Elena – there was nowhere else to stand – and noticed that Stefan had paper lanterns in his hand.
"We're finishing the memorial we didn't get to have earlier," He responded as he handed a lantern to Elena. "We need to start healing, Damon. We've all lost so much, especially recently." I flinched and hugged myself. "I think we're numb to it. We push it away, we make a joke out of it, ignore how we feel. We've never just let ourselves grieve." As he spoke everyone was handed a lantern and we all stood around in a circle.
I snorted. "So you're lighting lanterns?"
"Yeah. Yeah, we need to do this," Stefan nodded to me.
Damon spoke up, "What we need to do is find out who this hunter is and what he knows about the death of the council."
I nodded in agreement. "We have more important things to be doing right now than this," I was such a hypocrite since I was just telling Elena that I needed to grieve, but now that I was given a chance I didn't want to.
"Not tonight, we don't," Stefan said and Damon scoffed. "This is for my uncle Zach and for my friend Lexi and for Alaric." Stefan lit his lantern before passing the lighter to Matt.
"This is for Vicki," He followed suit and passed it to Caroline.
"This is for my dad. And Tyler's."
It was given to Jeremy next and he looked at Elena and I. "This is for our parents," He looked at Matt. "For Vicki. Anna. Jenna. And Alaric."
I decided that if Damon did it that I would, but when Jeremy held the lighter out to him he refused. "No way. I'm not doing that," He said before walking off so it was passed to Bonnie.
"This is for my grams," She said, lighting her lantern, then holding the lighter out to me.
I stared at it a moment before laughing bitterly and dropping the lantern Stefan had handed me. "You're all lame. Lighting lanterns doesn't magically make you get over the deaths of your loved ones."
I started to walk off when Stefan called out, "It helps make it easier."
I stopped and turned to face them, my fists clenched. "I felt everything Klaus did as he died. I felt his fear, his loneliness, his pain, his remorse… I felt it all. I've not slept in over forty-eight hours… and lighting a lantern is going to help me? Nice try," I went to my car and climbed in. I sped off and headed towards Klaus's mansion to go see Elijah. I only wanted to see him at the moment and no one else because I could feel myself cracking. Everything was crumbling down and I needed to see him because Klaus wasn't here. Plus I needed to find out what he was hiding.
I walked into the mansion without knocking. "Elijah?" I called out. "Elijah, where the hell are you?"
He was suddenly in front of me, an angry expression on his face. "You should not be here. Go."
"What? No, Elijah, I need―"
"Andrea, if you don't leave I will force you to."
"Do it, I don't care," I growled. "But you need to at least tell me what you've been hiding from me."
"I will explain later―"
"No!" I shouted. "I'm tired of being lied to, Elijah! I feel like I'm going crazy. Tell me what you've been hiding now!"
"Well, Elijah, why don't you tell her?"
I froze up, my blood seemed to turn to ice. I slowly turned toward the voice and felt myself break. It was as if I could hear everything shatter. This was impossible. This could not be happening. "How… How is this possible?" I choked out.
"Well hello to you, too, love," The figure grinned at me.
It was Klaus.
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The End of Chapter XLIII