Minna oyasashiburi desu! eto… toriaezu, anata no suteki na reviews arigatou gozaimashita! :3
soreni honto ni gomenasai deshita! For my late updates that is…
and for that I will make longer chapters to make up for those long updates!
dewa! chapter 6 no dozo! Please let me know what you think and what I need to improve :))
Natsu's P.O.V
'Lucy… I wonder if she's okay…?' I said to myself.
If Gray didn't stop me, I already followed her but, at that time….
I think it's the first time Gray sense what Lucy is feeling so I let him follow her instead… is that a mistake…?
◘Flash back◘
"hey, is Lucy okay? She's weird today." Asked Gray as he continue to stare at the running figure of Lucy.
"You're right, Gray." Erza agreed. "Natsu, do you know something?" then she ask me with a threatening voice.
"W-What are you talking about…? S-she is acting like her usual self right…?" I nervously said as I Sweat drop.
"Are you sure, you're stupid after all." Gray said.
In my annoyance a vain pop in my head, "What did you said you moro-!" I stop then look at him. He was suddenly spacing out. "Oi. Are you listening to m-!" once again I stop because he suddenly run outside following Lucy while saying,
"There's no way She's alright! She's definitely weird today!"
When he's about to run I stopped him by gabbing his left wrist then said, "If you follow her, what will you do?" I ask with a serious tone on my voice.
'What the heck?! I will not let you see her….! I know she's crying right now…! Beside you're the one who is causing her to suffer! You can't do a thing idiot!'I said in my mind.
"What will I do? Help her of course! I'll help her with her problem… well whatever it is…. I'll be there for her! I AM HER FRIEND." He run and run wanting to catch up with Lucy. I never got the chance to chase him anymore.
"Yeah, it'll be good if you're just a friend to her…. But…." I whispered with a face full of worry.
"He's unbelievable! He doesn't even know a thing…! He doesn't even know her problems! He doesn't even know what's happening to her…. Yet… yet…" I said.
"Natsu… could you tell me what's happening? It looks like I'm the only one who's left out." Erza said.
"… There's nothing to know about actually." I lied. "It's just Lucy is not feeling well, that's all..." I lied again. I don't know If she knows I'm Lying or not but I can't tell anyone about what's happening, especially Erza.
'I'm sorry, Erza.'
I heard Erza sigh then talk, "oh, I see. Well how about this, do you still love Lucy?" she ask as she drop out the topic.
"wah-?! How the heck did you know that?!" I said blushing as red as a tomato.
"Well we know it since childhood that you love Lucy. That is why I'm asking you if you still love her. Well your over protective towards her." She said.
"yeah, to be honest I still love her… but… all I can do is protect her… to stay by her side helping her… but to be in a relationship with her… is the only thing I can't do…" I said with a very sad face. I never make such faces in front of others. This is the first time…
"hmmm… so even Natsu can be depressed over such things!" she giggled. "But, wouldn't it be better for you to be honest to her? I mean, for you to tell her your feelings towards her." She said.
"Well… I would do it if I could… but, I'm afraid…. though I don't know why I'm afraid…" I said scratching the back of my head.
"Maybe… you're afraid to ruin your relationship. Your afraid that if you confess to her, you can't stay by her side anymore, because your best friends after all. It'll be hard if you fall in love with your best friend right?" she said. I can see she understand me better than I understand myself.
"Yeah… maybe your right… haha…" I faked a laugh. "But… I can't be honest about my feelings towards her… because first of all…. I know I don't have a chance… second of all…She loves a man that don't like her back… she always have the feelings that she don't want… so I need to stay by her side protecting her…and third of all… she…Lucy… have a fiancé … she also have a problem about it so I have to stay beside her… although it's not enough for me to be happy…. As long as could see her smile… that's enough for me…" I continued.
"oh… I never thought Lucy have a fiancé … even though she loves someone…" Erza said.
"Yeah… She is now lost if she would agree on it or not… but… whatever choice she would choose it would hurt her and the others around her… I also know that… Lucy wanted to forget the man he loves so badly… I just don't know what I can do to help her… all I can do is to watch her cry…. I'm so useless…"I said as I faked a smile.
"Heh! What are you doing? Your just thinking about yourself and not Lucy at all!" she said. Erza stood up and point a finger at me.
"Natsu! There is no time to be depressed! You said Lucy wanted to move on right? Then why not help her move on?" she suggested.
I sweat drop then asked, "W-what do you mean…?" Erza sigh and said,
"What I'm saying is, confess to her. Lucy wanted to move on and you'll be the one who will be helping her. And also, there will be a big possibility that she will fall for you, right?"
My eyes widened for what Erza said.
'She may fall for me….?' I asked in my mind.
"Erza, there's no way that will happen! Besides I don't really get i-" Erza didn't let me finish.
"sigh, Natsu…. I can't believe you're still an air head! It's just like hitting two birds with one stone stupid! You confess! You help her move on! She'll fall for you! Done" Erza said.
I sweat dropped, "Erza… I get it already- and I'm not an air head!" I protested. "Beside… were not really sure if Lucy will accept my feelings right? We should consider hers to." I continued.
"And what if she said 'yes'? You know… nothing will happen unless you try Natsu." Erza patted me on my right shoulder then smiled. "Why don't you try it first?" she said then waved me goodbye.
I stood there thinking of what Erza have said.
"It's like hitting two birds with one stone stupid!" "Confess to her" "nothing will happen unless you try Natsu." Those words that Erza have said kept spinning inside my head,
"ARGHH! I'm using up all my energy to think! I never use my mind for thinking-! Ah.. I mean… I can't think this much!" I complaint, I totally forgot that I'm in the cafeteria. What's worst is I'm alone! Many people are laughing! Maybe their thinking that I'm nuts!
'Ahh-! My reputation! It's ruined!' I shouted in my mind.
I run out of that freaking cafeteria and go back to our classroom.
I sat in my seat near the window. As I look outside viewing the large oval of our school, I kept thinking of what happened to Lucy and Gray.
*oval-uhm... It's like a large garden in school. (Well that's how I describe it. :3)
"She's not here yet huh…" I say while my chin is resting in my palm. I ruffled my hair trying to stop thinking stupid things, but I can't. I sigh, I rested my face on the table and said,
"I wonder what happened to them…" I fell silent for a moment.
"What if I confess..? Nothing will change right…?" I said blankly.
"well, what do you want to do?" someone spoke up. I didn't realize that someone is there and answer,
" me…? I want to confess.." I said again blankly.
"ohh. Then go on and confess." I blink once then twice, as I realize that Mira is right in front of me. I was startled and fell from my seat. "M-m-mira since when did you got here?!" I ask trying to get out of the floor I fell in.
"hn? Since the part that you said, "What if I confess..? Nothing will change right…?" Mira said in a mimicking tone. I blush then she said,
"teehe~ this is nice I'm able to see a GUTLESS Natsu" she smiled innocently then continued,
"GUTLESS… hey Natsu, What's the feeling of being GUTLESS?" she then smiled again innocently but I can feel that she's saying that I'm gutless on purpose… I sweat drop.
"Mira… I already had enough…. so please?" I said while slouching at my table. "
You're planning to confess to Lucy?" She said.
"No." I gave her a quick answer.
"But you said yes." She said.
"No I didn't." I look away. I can't look at her in the eyes because we all knew that I wanted to… but I'm- "Scared?" she said I suddenly met her blue orbs, then I look away again.
"I'll take that as a yes." She said. "You know Natsu this is the only advice that I can give to you.
"You should follow your heart." You kept on denying to yourself that you don't want to confess, but you knew that deep in your heart you wanted to." she said. She had a sisterly tone on her voice.
"Saying that stuff, you don't even know a thing!" I realize that I raised my voice to her. "I'm sorry.." I Murmured.
"You're wrong. I can understand you. I know that you're scared cause you might change your relationship with her, but let me ask you one thing… are you happy right now?" the question that she asked me struck me.
'Am I happy..?' I asked on my mind.
" Natsu We..no.. You're the one who knows the most that you can't stay be her side forever. That the time will come that she will found someone to protect her, someone that will stay by her side forever. While you... you will always bear the feelings that you have for her in secret. Natsu you're just hurting yourself more. Just like the person I know…" she said. I can feel that Mira cared for me like I'm his little brother because of the tone of her voice.
"But… what will happen after I confess…?" I ask. Mira just smiled at me warmly then held my hand and said,
"You are the one to decide." She smiled.
"…" I didn't respond to what she said.
"I see.. You're still afraid." Mira sighed.
"Mira, you said well!" Erza said while wiping her eyes with a handkerchief. Again I was startled and fell. "WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! SUDDENLY APPEARING OUT OF NOWHERE! IT'S NOT GOOD ON MY HEALT YOU KNOW!" I shouted. They just laugh then Erza said,
"So, 'you gonna confess?" I stayed silent for a minute.
"I guess…" I said scratching the back of my head.
"Well that's great. Seems like Mira is the one who pulled your string" Erza smiled. "But remember this Natsu, well it's not like we're scaring you but…l You have to be ready whatever the outcome is because you can't change it." Erza said. I gulped the said,
"I-I know that...! Already.." Erza smiled and said "Good."
"Natsu, remember to keep your cool. Do not let your blood goes to your brain. Who knows what you would do." Mira said.
"Yeah, yeah." I said half heartedly.
They just sighed. "Don't forget to inform us what happened, okay?" Erza said.
"Ahh" I said.
'Well… I better do it…' I inhaled then exhaled. "YOSH! MOEKTAZO!"
Erza's P.O.V
'sigh… I somehow manage to give Natsu a nice advice… and yet… I can't even do the things that I said to him… that stupid Jellal…'
"hnnn~~! J-Jellal-sama…~~ n-not t-there… ahn~! T-that tickles….~~! Mnn~~! Y-yes…~~ T-there..~" I heard a girl…
'moaning..? w-wait did she just said Jellal?'
"hmm…? Where..? here?" I heard a familiar voice.
'so it is HIM…'
"nn~~! Ahh~! It feels good Jellal-sama…~~" I blushed.
'W-w-w-what the heck are they doing in there?! A-a-a-as the student b-body president I cannot let this indicent thing to hap-'
"NNN~! J-Jellal-sama~~! More~~! Nn~" she moan again…
the sound got me pissed of. I slam the damn door open which revealed Jellal and some girl in a certain position.
"What the hell are you doing in the school?! If you want to make out, do it in an hotel damn it! If the principal find out about this you'll be expelled!" I shouted while blushing really hard. I'm just weak on thing like this.
"H-hold on… I think you're misunderstanding something, Erza."he sweat drop.
"hm? Misunderstanding you say? Then what was that moans mean?" I questioned.
"sigh… so I'm right you really are misunderstanding something." He said, "This girl said her back hurts so I massage it, and that moans… she's just feeling good and ticklish that's all." He smiled.
"That maybe so, but what about that awkward position you have earlier?"
"oh~ that? I was about lay down and Jellal-sama was about to massage me.. Anyway we just wanted to switch in a comfortable position." The girl said.
"yeah, she's telling the truth." He said, then he said to his? girl, "I'm sorry my cute liltle kitten… but could you leave us for a second…?" Jellal make a puppy eyes.
the girl insisted.
"….." I didn't say a thing. Talk about awkward.
' It's such a long time that I have been alone with him…'
"hey… what was that earlier?" he ask me.
"GIKU!" I suddenly felt weak, afraid and embarrassed.
'arghhh! It's so embarrassing!Calm down! Calm down, Erza!'
"It can't be help! When somebody hears a moaning sound like that…. It's pretty suspicious! Specially when it's you… you are the schools number 1 playboy." I said to him bluntly.
To be honest I'm really angry with him! Even to the point that I don't understand why I still love him…
'should it be better… I move on…?'
"You… do you really think I could do such things..? hahahaha..!" he laugh. "I won't do It to someone except to y-…." I cut him off.
"you… really change, huh..? it seems like you're not the Jellal I know…" I smiled bitterly.
"well.. a lot of thing happened…"he said.
"-ill…will the old Jellal….come back…?" I asked.
'Gosh! It looks like I'm desperate…'
"uhh… the… the Jellal you knew back then… please consider that he will never comeback… and already dead…" he said, there are a painful expression in his eyes that he has failed hiding.
"s-so… that means… were over, right…? No… ever since the day that you came back…. were finished already…right…?" I smiled, but even though, I can't hold back my tears.
"m…mm… I'm sorry.." he said as he look down. I can't see his eyes because of his bangs.
'I… thought so… but… why… why am I crying…? Sorry…. Those are the word I don't want to hear from him… It looks like he's rejecting me…'
Itai...kokoro ga itai...
"a-ah… I see… I was right…" I smiled; tears are still falling from my eyes. "I… at least I know it clearly now… gomen ne, atashi… kairu kara…." I run out the door while tears are falling.
'as I though… I can't deny that I still love him…'
"it hurts…" I whispered.
'It hurts me that…. It's already too late… Jellal is right…. The real jellal…. The jellal that I know… is now gone…'
"Forget…." I faintly said
'forget… I want to forget him…. If this keeps going; seeing Jellal with other girls doing kissing and stuff….I … I don't know what I will do…'
"Forget…. Please… I want to move on…" I sob.
A hand suddenly grabbed me into a tight hug, but my vision is still blurry because of the tears but it's a man… with a black hair…
"Gray…" I called out. "w-what are you doing…?" I said as I tried to break free from his tight hug. But I can't I'm stronger than him but I'm to weak to bring my strength out right now…
"it's okay… you can cry all you want… I'm here… I'll protect you so don't worry…" he said. I burry my face in his chest and cried a lot.
"….. thank you…" that's the only words I manage to say.
The truth is, there so many words I wanted to say to him but… -
"Erza…" he patted my head, which causes me to blush a little. "you will not cry again… I promise… I will not let anyone harm you… so…"he said.
'What does he mean…?'
"What do you mean…?" I asked as I lifted my head up to look at him.
"You wanted to forget him right…?" he asked.
"ahh… mm…" I just nodded.
"Then use me." He suddenly said. I can feel from his voice that he is serious, that he's not joking… my eyes just widen and I became speechless.
'w-wha..t…? use him…? I-I-I can't ever do that…!'
"What are you sayi-.." he cut me off by saying,
"I Love You, Erza, That's why I don't want to see you cry. I don't want to see you hurt, because of a guy. I want to protect you. I always want to be by your side. I'll make you forget jellal." My eyes widened.
'G-Gray… is willing to go that far…? H-he loves me…? I…I…'
"Gray… I…-" I stop my sentence.
'I… can use him…? Too forget Jellal…? It's true that I really want to move on... but using gray… I don't know if I can do that…'
"It's okay. I'll wait for your answer, for now you need to go home and rest." he patted my head again and waved goodbye.
I'm still shocked from this sudden happening… what will I answer gray….? I don't want to hurt him but… If I choose to say yes to him, gray will also be hurt because of me...
'I don't know what to do…'
◘to be continued◘
hey, guys! Sorry again for my late updates (I'm too lazy XD Lol)
Well anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter, I don't know if its long enough for you though…sorry.. ^^"
I hope you look forward to the next chapter! What will happen to the confession of Natsu? What will be the answer of Erza? Please look forward to it ;)