Chapter 5

"No, absolutely not!" Izzie shook her head in disbelief.

"It's true," Ji-hu shrugged, sipping his tea with an even expression.

"That can't be. You cannot convince me that you did not prefer the white chocolate almond with the cherry filling to the lemon cake with blueberry!"

The woman presenting them with the long line of cakes exchanged a look with her assistant before quietly excusing them both from the room. Now alone, Izzie leaned back in her chair, turning to glare at Ji-hu. He playfully matched her pose, stooping to meet her gaze directly. Izzie found it difficult to maintain her composure as he grinned at her, but she fought to keep the smile from her face.

"This is serious business, Doc. You are rejecting what may be the lightest, most delicious cake that has ever existed. It tastes like a cloud, Ji-hu! A cloud!"

"That well may be. I liked the lemon. And I don't think either is right for the wedding."

"Aish! You're impossible!" she threw up her hands and grabbed her teacup and notebook, scanning over her scribbled reviews of each of the cakes they had sampled. Every possible fruit combination had been prepared for them, and each cake was fluffier and lighter than the previous until Izzie was half convinced she was eating air. She was fully convinced, however, that this day was her favorite wedding planning day yet.

It had been nearly a month since she had come to Korea, and in that time she and Ji-hu had started meeting every day to work on the wedding. After a while, they had also begun to spend time together without the 'wedding gamebook' as she had affectionately named it. Ji-hu had given her tours of Seoul and the surrounding area, they had gone to movies and before long Izzie found she was annoyed during those hours of the day he was at the hospital and she had to take care of other Shinhwa business.

"Sir, Madam, if it would please you, I have another cake I would like for you to try. It is a new recipe that our pastry chef has been perfecting and, while he does not think it is quite ready, I think it may suit your needs." The cake lady's voice interrupted Izzie's musings and she immediately straightened to attention as the assistant brought in two new plates, setting them carefully before Izzie and Ji-hu.

Izzie eyed the cake critically, surprised that she hadn't noticed they hadn't previously been presented with a chocolate option. She picked up her fork and took a small bite, her eyes going wide before they finally drifted close in satisfaction. The chocolate was dark, nearly bitter, but so smooth it felt more like a truffle than cake. It was then that the flavor of lime cut through the chocolate and almost cleansed her palate, cutting the richness of the dense cake so that it didn't weigh heavily on her stomach. She quickly looked to Ji-hu, who was smiling in equal enjoyment.

"This is it, right?" she asked, taking another bite though she had long ago passed the point of wanting more cake.

"No question," he agreed.

"Miss Lee, thank you. Tell your chef not to change a thing: this cake is perfect!"

The woman and assistant bowed, looking pleased with themselves, and Izzie quickly hashed out the details with the woman for the wedding and graciously accepted a box containing the remainder of the sample cake they had tried. When they left the bakery, Izzie couldn't help but open the box and took another taste of the frosting.

"How can you stand any more sugar? I feel I've eaten enough for the week!" Ji-hu chided as she slid her finger from her mouth.

"I know, but that icing is so good! I'm such a sucker for cream cheese. What?" she quirked her head as he gave her an odd look.

He shook his head and reached into his pocket, stepping closer as he pulled out a handkerchief. Izzie froze, her breath catching as he held the back of her head with one hand, and with the other wiped the corner of her mouth with the silk handkerchief. As he brushed her lip Izzie found her eyes focusing on his, suddenly wondering if they were as soft as they appeared. She brushed away the thought as he stepped back, instead just smiling him her thanks.

Admittedly, that moment was not the first that she had found herself thinking about kissing Ji-hu. In fact, her mind over the last few nights had been wandering far past kissing and well into areas that made her embarrassed to think of in the daytime. She hadn't read much into it, given that he was an incredibly attractive male and she was a straight female that hadn't had any intimate physical contact in an embarrassingly long time. As the thoughts started to flood into her waking thoughts, however, Izzie realized that, perhaps, she was becoming a little more than just attracted to Ji-hu.

"So, now that we're full of cake, would you like to go for a ride? Maybe take a walk in Namsan park?" he asked, seeming to ignore the way she had momentarily been lost in thought.

"Oh, I wish I could. Unfortunately, I have a dress fitting to attend, since Jan-di doesn't have any more cousins to scrounge up for the wedding." While Izzie had been relieved when Jan-di agreed it was best to ask a cousin instead of Seo-hyun to be in her wedding, she had been less than thrilled to learn she would still have to be in the wedding party herself.

"Are you going by yourself?"

"Mmhm. Jan-di had her fitting with Ga-eul yesterday. I couldn't go because of that meeting with the photographer so they're slipping me in this evening. Then I think I'm going to go back to the hotel, order pizza, have a beer and try to find some American baseball."

"Feeling homesick?"

"Maybe a touch," Izzie admitted, not realizing how much she had been missing the States until the past few days. She craved insignificant things like root beer and Tollhouse chocolate chip cookies, and was looking forward to a night of indulging in as much Americana as she could gather.

"Could I join you?"

Izzie was caught off-guard by his question and when she looked at him, she realized Ji-hu seemed just as surprised he had asked it. He smiled, then and Izzie knew she couldn't refuse.

"Of course. But I can't imagine any of that sounds exciting to you."

"Mm. I like baseball."

He began to prepare his bike, and Izzie took her cue to do the same, oddly pleased that he wanted to spend such a laid back evening with her. She drove off without a word, hearing him follow behind her as they took off to the boutique where their gowns were being made. A rumble caused her to glance upwards and Izzie noticed the overcast sky was becoming a bit more ominous. She prayed the weather would hold out until she was happily tucked away in her hotel.

Izzie's prayer went unanswered. As soon as she had finished changing back into her regular clothing the sky opened and a deluge began to assault the city.

"Would you like me to call a car?" Ji-hu asked as she joined him at the front window of the shop.

"It did have to pour on the only day I've had to park blocks away from my destination, huh?" She watched the water rushing like a small river in the gutter, but realized she would rather be wet than deal with the headache of worrying about the safety of her bike all night.

"I won't melt. You?" she asked with a grin.

"I'll survive," he answered with a matching smile.

He followed her after accepting an umbrella from one of the girls in the shop, opening it over them as they stepped out into the storm. She was thankful that she had chosen to wear boots as the sidewalk was already flooded in certain spots from the rain, and she found she was equally thankful Ji-hu had chosen to wear dark colors for once as most puddles were entirely unavoidable.

"I guess it's a good thing we couldn't go to the park, hm?" she asked after a particularly loud clap of thunder had caused them both to jump.

"Yeah, looks like things turned out for the best."

"Although, I hope the storm keeps up. I love the sound of rain at night."

"Me too. My house is so quiet the rain sounds like a symphony when it hits the roof; it's beautiful."

"The house I grew up in had a screened in porch and whenever as storm was blowing in my dad and I would go sit out there and watch the rain sweep in the valley. My mom always thought we were crazy, but it was just amazing." Izzie felt a pang of nostalgia as she thought of her childhood home and the way her mother would always tell her father they were fools for coming in on sunny days and going out on rainy ones.

"And how do your parents feel about you moving to Korea?"

"Um...they're pretty quiet about it. My dad died when I was twelve from a blood clot. Hence I can't sit still on a plane...I just think about what happened to him the whole time."

"And...your mom?"

"Mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer when I was twenty-one. She died ten months later."

"I'm sorry."

Izzie ignored the old ache that started any time her parents were mentioned. She shrugged and gave him a weak smile. "I was lucky. I got to have time with both of my parents and have cherished memories. And I had my mom to help me through dad's death, and ten months to prepare for hers. That's better than becoming an orphan at five. Or, worse, having living parents that may as well be dead, like Jun-pyo."

Izzie almost stepped into the rain when she realized that Ji-hu had stopped walking. She looked up at him curiously and grew concerned when she saw his expression was almost angry.

"You shouldn't measure your own unhappiness by someone else's. You are allowed to be sad for your own loss, even if you think someone else's is greater. You can never know someone else's pain, so you shouldn't assume you know it's weight."

"I...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply – "

"It's all right. Just know that...it's okay to be sad for yourself. Even if someone is in a worse situation, it's okay to acknowledge yours is bad too."

Before she could respond Ji-hu started walking again, taking her to her bike and handing her the helmet before he closed the umbrella and put on his own. Izzie tried to push away the sudden gloominess that had come over her, not wanting to ruin the fun day they had enjoyed to that point. She drove carefully on the wet roads that led to her hotel, enjoying the feel of the raindrops that soaked through her pants as they hit her. By the time they had parked she was feeling slightly better, but felt her stomach drop when Ji-hu grabbed her arm as she stepped into the lobby. She looked at him and he gave her a sad smile.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told you how to feel. After my parents died, everyone kept telling me how I should handle it. For years they would give their opinions on how I should grieve and it infuriated me. I shouldn't have done that to you."

Izzie felt her mood instantly brighten as she patted his hand. "It's all right. At least you know what you're talking about."

"Hm. I suppose."

"Hey! I have an idea!" The thought struck her suddenly and she ignored the people that were grumbling about them blocking the doors to the lobby. "Why don't we play a drinking game while we wait for the pizza. We'll share the most awful and creative condolences we've received from people who have heard about our parents dying! Person with the best or most unique advice wins!"

Ji-hu laughed heartily then, and all trace of Izzie's previous melancholy suddenly disappeared. She linked arms with him as he laughed and led the way to the elevators, already thinking about all of the terrible things people had said to her in their misguided attempts to provide comfort.

"You have such a strange outlook on life, Izzie," he said as the elevator door opened.

"I know," she said, beaming at him. "Wait, you did mean that as a complement, right?"

Ji-hu only responded by shaking his head and grinning, which was enough to satisfy Izzie. They didn't speak as the elevator door opened, stepping aside to let a middle-aged couple pass them before they stepped into the car. Just before the door slid shut, Izzie saw the woman turn back to look at them before speaking loudly enough for her to hear: "what a glamorous couple, don't you think? I wonder if she was one of those Hollywood stars."

Izzie looked at Ji-hu and they both burst out laughing as soon as the doors were closed. By the time they reached her floor Izzie was wiping tears from her eyes.

"Miss Hollywood," Ji-hu said with a bow as he held the car doors open for her.

"Oh, shut up! Bear is a bad enough nickname!" she lamented as she walked into the hallway, though secretly she smiled.

It wouldn't be so bad to be your Hollywood girlfriend. If only you had come to New York instead of JP...she shook the thought away as she opened the door to her hotel room.

No, Izzie. You are done having crushes on emotionally unavailable guys. Stop trying to compete with Jan-di. Just let him be your friend.

She shut and locked the door with that mantra in her head, shoving aside the hints of butterflies in her stomach as she headed for the refrigerator of beer.