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Long after the sun had set Esposito swung open the door to his apartment to reveal an exhausted looking Ryan who grinned tiredly and entered. "You look wrecked man."

"It's been quite a day, plus it's…" he looked down at his watch, "Almost midnight."

After slipping off his black jacket the two dropped down onto the couch and munched on the pizza that had arrived shortly before he got there, Esposito turning on his pre-recorded football game. "You watch football bro?"

"You mean your American bastardization of the sport and not Caid?" he replied dryly. He let the other man squirm a bit before he grinned, "Whenever I get the chance." He leaned forward and grabbed another Guinness off the table, "So what happened today? A murder?"

Esposito was finding that the bartender had a much wider and dryer sense of humor than he first thought. "Yeah man, it's crazy how many people die everyday just in this city."

Ryan's flinch was barely perceptible and he let out a forced laugh, "I bet."

It was clear as the game progressed that Ryan wasn't going to make it to the end, his eyes kept drifting closed and he kept leaning to one side before jerking back to his original position. Hoping he wasn't overstepping boundaries he snaked an arm around the Irishman and pulled him closer. To his pleasure Ryan snuggled into his side and buried his face in his neck with a whispered sigh. He suppressed a shiver as his companions warm breath softly puffed against his skin, the heat from his cheek warming his shoulder.

This wasn't good, wasn't good at all.

He was falling hard and fast for the slighter man, from his gorgeous blue eyes to his slightly cocky words that did nothing to conceal the adorable dorkiness underneath. Ryan seemed shy when he first began talking to him, almost standoffish really but once you got him talking you couldn't shut him up. He knew more about Star Wars than Esposito thought possible and random facts seemed to pop up in conversations showing he lived for knowledge. He had a love for technology unlike anyone else he had ever met and had let it slip he collects Zippo lighters.

A couple hours later the game ended and Esposito clicked off the tv leaving the room bathed in the soft glow from the kitchen light. His fingers lazily moved up and down his companion's arm and he rested his cheek on his soft spiky hair for a few quiet minutes allowing himself the luxury of being close to another person. Not wanting to move but not wanting to make Ryan uncomfortable by letting him spend the night he gently shook the smaller man, "Ryan, games over bro." The other man mumbled something but never moved so he tried again. "Come on, you need to go home."

Ryan blinked sleepily and pulled back slightly to yawn, "Sorry, guess I was more beat than I thought."

Esposito nodded and walked towards the door following Ryan who was stretching his back and grabbing his coat. He slipped on his leather jacket and turned, "I'd say it was fun but I was asleep for most of it. Maybe we can hang out again when I'm not so tired."

Esposito grinned and nodded, "Sounds good." He wanted to kiss him goodbye, if only for a confirmation that this was a date of sorts and Ryan held some feelings for him but he refrained. If Ryan only wanted to be friends it wouldn't do him any favors to come onto him after only really hanging out once. All the worry was for nothing because Ryan took the choice out of his hands a second later.

Figuring he had nothing to lose he grabbed Esposito's tie and pulled him closer before pressing his lips softly against his. To his delight the other man kissed back and gently nudged him backwards until his back hit the door. The kiss deepened when Javier slid his tongue past his lips but they still kept an almost lazy pace, the only aggressive thing about it Esposito's posture. Ryan kept his arms hanging loosely at his sides but he couldn't have moved them even if he wanted, Esposito's larger frame was smashed against him and his hands were planted firmly on the wood biting into his back preventing hardly any movement.

It could have continued but a nagging in the back of his mind told him to stop this, that it was dangerous to continue for more reasons than he could count. Forcing the words out he pulled back slightly until the back of his head was resting against the door, "As tempting as it is to stay I should really go Esposito."

The dark skinned man placed one final light kiss on his lips and stepped back with more self-control than he thought he possessed, "Call me Javi."

Ryan grinned and swung open the door, "Call me later."

"I will Ryan."

He turned and began walking down the hallway but paused and turned with a small blush, "Kevin, my name is Kevin."

The next day at the precinct Esposito couldn't keep the smile from his face, which of course Castle instantly picked up on. "And what has you smiling so large?"

He instantly dropped his smile and squared his shoulders, "I don't know what you're talking about."

Beckett failed at stopping her smirk, "Must have been a good night. What's his name?"

Esposito sighed, "Don't we have a murder to solve?" That instantly popped Beckett back to work but Castle shook his head at the diversion.

"Give us something, you haven't been this giddy in months."

Knowing he needed to throw him a bone or else he would be hounded all day he thought of something to tell. "He has the most amazing blue eyes, the color is indescribable."

Castle's smile grew at his soft tone, his friend was completely smitten whether he realized it or not. "How about, 'Pools of blue so bright that they seemed to have stolen the color of the sky from heaven itself, a blue so deep one wondered if it was possible to drown in them'?"

Esposito glared at his light teasing, "Like I said before, don't we have a murder to solve?"

It took four long days to finish the case and in those four days Esposito never tried to call Ryan once, he could only hope that the bartender wasn't taking it the wrong way and that whats-her-name wasn't spending time with him while he couldn't. He fished his phone from his pocket and went to the still unfamiliar number and hit send, after a few rings the call was answered.

"What?"

Esposito could barely hear him over the noise but could clearly hear the impatience in his snappy tone, "It's Esposito, this a bad time?"

Shuffling could be heard followed by a few shouts and curses Esposito had no idea what meant, "Some guys can't handle their liquor. Haven't heard from ya in a bit."

He picked up on the almost hidden hurt and felt bad he was the cause of it. "Heavy case bro but I just finished it. You working late tonight?"

"'Til two but if you don't care I can come by after that. I'm pretty wired from all the excitement."

"Sure bro. Would it be easier for me to go to your place?"

"Actually yeah." He recited his address before a loud crash and shattering glass could be heard. "The fuck is wrong with you!" he shouted away from the phone. "I have to go, I'll see ya half past two."

The call disconnected abruptly and Esposito wondered how Ryan handled himself with a bunch of rough drunks on a daily basis. After arriving at his home he showered and took a much needed nap before grabbing some takeout and going to the address he was given earlier. He knocked and waited for the door to be unlocked and when it opened Ryan was standing there looking disheveled and sporting a split lip. The shorter man stepped to the side to let him enter and locked the door behind him. Esposito had noticed on his way over that Ryan didn't live in the best part of town but some things couldn't be helped, at least he had a shotgun behind the door. He could only hope he legally owned it.

Esposito set down the food and turned to face his companion. He lifted his hand and rubbed his thumb carefully across his bottom lip and the cut and frowned when Ryan winced. Blue met brown and Ryan offered a small smile, "I'm fine Javi."

Not wanting to make Ryan feel uncomfortable by him being a mother hen, something he did that his last boyfriend had called to his attention, he just kissed the other side of his mouth and stepped back to glance around the apartment. The interior was a far cry from the outside of the building and Esposito could only barely keep his surprise concealed at how extremely nice it was inside, from the hand painted pictures on the wall to the seemingly brand new kitchen appliances. To the average person it probably looked inviting but to Esposito it looked cold and unlived in. There were no pictures of family, no intimate touches, no knick knacks. It almost looked like someone just picked a picture out of a magazine and copied it. It was just so... not Ryan.

Speaking of Ryan he turned and met his eyes which were watching him curiously. A snort of laughter escaped him when he noticed something. "You dress like a bartender."

Ryan frowned in slight confusion as he glanced down at what he was wearing. It was his usual outfit of slacks, button-up shirt, vest, and leather laced boots. "What does that mean?"

"I don't know. You just look like one."

"Well considering I am one I guess that's not a bad thing. You dress like a cop."

"How's a cop dress?"

Ryan shrugged and walked over to the takeout, "Like you. They always dress nice, but they're not over dressed. Not cheap suits but not expensive since there's a chance you'll destroy it. Even when you dress casual it's not true casual. They walk with this sense of entitlement too." His eyes widened when he realized what he said, "I mean…"

Esposito waved it off, "I get it, relax. So I got Chinese, hope that's ok."

"I love Chinese," he mumbled as he dug into one of the containers. "Mu shu pork is the best."

Esposito walked over next to him and began to eat, "An Irishman eating Chinese, I'm sure there's a joke in here somewhere."

"Why stop there? An Irishman eating Chinese with a Puerto Rican on a table I bought off a Russian. We're like the United Nations."

Esposito paused with his chopsticks halfway to his mouth, "How'd you know I was Puerto Rican? Most people think I'm Mexican."

"I pay attention," he said nonchalantly as he grabbed a bottle of liquor off the counter and two glasses before returning to the table.

The room descended into a comfortable silence until dinner was finished and Ryan had downed more shots of whisky than was probably safe. He was barely staying conscious and Esposito hoped he wouldn't offend him by calling him on it. "You seem to drink quite a bit."

Bloodshot and unfocused eyes met his, "No such thing as an Irish alcoholic." Seeing his answer wasn't making the other man happy he sighed, "I'm fine, just a long day. I know when to stop."

"You work tomorrow?" he asked as he found the trashcan and threw away the empty packages.

A lopsided grin covered the other man's face, "Nope. Finally get a couple days off, and it's been a while. I don't call in sick ever so it's been about fifty-two days since the last day off."

"Why work so much? Don't they pay you ok?"

He stood unsteadily, "Not much else to do, plus they like me there. The other one doesn't listen very well, good thing she's got awesome boobs otherwise she'd been gone long time ago."

Esposito snorted and looked at the time on the microwave. "Seems that wired feeling wore off huh? I'll head out and let you get some sleep."

Ryan stumbled over to him and wrapped his arms around waist, "Don't go Javi, please. Stay with me."

He released a shaky breath when soft lips suddenly wisped across his ear and blunt teeth nipped playfully at his jaw. He didn't even try to deny to himself how badly he wanted this as Ryan grabbed his shirt and kissed him aggressively. It was hot and dirty and Esposito couldn't help but react to the roughness, both men pushing further and refusing to back down. Nips turned to bites, caresses turned to bruising grips and it took Ryan biting his bottom lip so hard it bled for him to realize that this had crossed the line into violent territory.

This wasn't who he had come to enjoy, the person in front of him was unrecognizable. He could enjoy playing roughly just as much as soft and tender but Ryan was beyond intoxicated and his behavior was only proving that with every passing second. This needed to stop. Now.

As the metallic taste of his own blood engulfed his mouth he roughly pushed Ryan away, "You're drunk whether you think so or not. I'm not doing this tonight."

Ryan glared as he stood panting, lips swollen and cheeks flushed. "Fuck you."

Javier turned to leave knowing it was pointless to discuss anything with someone who's had as much to drink as he had but halted when Ryan tentatively grabbed his arm. He turned expecting an argument but was surprised to find slightly scared eyes staring up at him. "I'm sorry. Please don't go. Stay with me, I won't do anything I just don't want to be alone."

He sounded so desperate and exposed, a complete one-eighty from only a few minutes ago and he didn't immediately respond to the request as his mind tried to catch up with what was happening. It was like emotional whiplash.

"Please Javi," Ryan said quietly as his fingers squeezed a tiny bit tighter.

A heavy sigh filled the apartment, "Fine, but we're talking about all this tomorrow. I'll lock up and you go to bed." He watched Ryan sway into a room before turning around and making sure everything was locked and secured. After the lights were turned off he entered the room where Ryan was already passed out under the covers. He set his service weapon on the table next to the bed, slipped off his pants, and slid under the comforter.

Sleep didn't come easily as he stared at the ceiling thinking about the man now snoring next to him. Everything had felt so new and exciting but it seemed at every turn something else unsavory was making itself known. The wheels in his head began to turn as he tried to make a mental list of everything he had found out that put Ryan firmly in the avoid category. 1. He obviously had a drinking problem and seemed to be a violent and emotional drunk, 2. He was directly involved with something illegal that involved cash and most likely some type of product, 3. He carried a pistol and used it to threaten people, 4. He worked in a place that most likely had something to do with a gang or the actual mob based off the obvious hierarchy, 5. He was making a substantial amount of money from something other than bartending because even though his clothes seemed casual they were all extremely high end and professionally tailored. Every single reason on it's own was enough to make him walk away without a second glance but all together they created a giant flashing warning to leave right this second.

A small noise from beside him made him turn and stare at Ryan who was trying to get comfortable. The sleeping man rolled over and wrapped his limbs around Javier, his hand gripping the fabric of his shirt tightly while he buried his face in his shoulder.

Esposito's arm automatically wrapped around him and as his soft hair tickled his chin he tried to remember all the reasons he should avoid Ryan, but not a single one would come to mind.