While Steve and Catherine were finishing up a wonderful breakfast, Danny moved out onto the patio to call Chin and Kono.
A short while later he joined them at the table and after refreshing their coffee he sat down.
Cath stated, "Breakfast was wonderful Danny, thank you"
"You're welcome. I hope you guys are okay with this. Chin got his Uncle's boat for the day so we can all enjoy a day on the water"
Steve grinned, "Really? You said you'd never go on a boat with me again"
"Well, I'm bringing Catherine, Kono and Chin along so they can help keep you under control. No swimming with the sharks today Steven"
As Catherine kissed Steve's cheek the SEAL stated, "Thanks Danno, it sounds great, and I promise...I'll stay in the boat"
The group had a fabulous day relaxing on the boat, enjoying the sun and good conversation. As the temperature rose Steve took his shirt off and Danny couldn't help but notice the large amount of fresh, blue/purple bruising on his side from his 'tackle' last night. He decided not be bring it up since Steve appeared to be enjoying himself. He looked at Chin and as their eyes met they both smiled at the realization their plan had worked. They had figured that getting Steve out of the house would be the best thing for him and it looked like they had been right. It was nice to see Steve relaxed and smiling.
When they arrived back at the house, Kono and Catherine went on a grocery run and while Danny and Chin took care of the boat they sent Steve inside to take a nap. He slept peacefully on the couch until the girls returned with steaks, jumbo shrimp, peppers, onions and potatoes along with a luscious cheesecake for dessert.
As they all milled around in the kitchen Danny asked Steve quietly, "Hey partner, how are your ribs man?"
"I'm a little sore, no big deal though"
"You know, I'm sorry about that…I didn't mean to hurt you"
"Are you kidding babe? It's a very small price to pay Daniel…..I owe you"
They clasped hands as Danny responded, "You don't owe me anything"
Steve then added, "I need to talk to Chin"
"Alright, I'll get the grill started"
Steve then called out, "Hey Chin, buddy can we go talk?"
The two men walked out into the yard as the others began to prepare dinner.
Chin inquired, "What's up boss? Is everything okay?"
"Yeah Chin, I just wanted to apologize to you for the other day"
A confused Chin responded, "What are you talking about?"
"I'm sorry about the other day…when I attacked you. I didn't know….."
"Steve, I know that. You don't owe me any apologizes. We're Ohana brah. We're in this together"
"Thank you brother"
"I haven't had a chance to really talk to you. Thank you for saving my life Steve"
Steve grinned at him, "Like you said, we're Ohana…you're welcome and I love you man"
"I love you too. Promise me something will you?"
"Yeah, what is it?"
"Don't ever forget that we're here for you and we always will be. You're not alone Steve"
As the two men embraced, Steve said softly, "Thank you"
They had a great dinner and afterwards Steve was exhausted. He insisted on helping clean up the kitchen but as soon as they were done and Chin and Kono said their goodbyes for the night Steve excused himself and went upstairs to bed. They had all agreed that for Catherine's safety, she would sleep in the spare bedroom with Danny sleeping on a cot next to his bed. Steve had been the one to suggest this, not being willing to take any chance of last nights' horror being repeated.
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Danny woke to Steve's moans at about two thirty in the morning. He had kicked the covers off the bed and he was curled in a fetal position clutching his stomach, with his back turned to Danny. He was wearing only boxers and his head and body were drenched in sweat. Danny pulled the sheet and blanket from the floor and covered him up. Steve was mumbling softly, obviously in the throes of yet another nightmare. This one though, Danny knew only too well.
Steve was saying over and over again, "I don't kknnow who Shellbburne iis….." His body was twitching, almost as if the electric prod was being applied at this moment and not simply being a horrific memory.
Danny had to wake him from this nightmare many times over the past year, but never when the SEAL had drugs coursing through his body. Instead of touching him and startling him, Danny leaned close to his ear and whispered to him calmly, "Steve, it's okay buddy, Danno's right here…I've got you partner. Danno's got you"
He continued talking to him softly until he heard Steve respond, his voice shaking with emotion, "Danno?"
Danny put a hand on his shoulder, "I'm here babe"
"Danny…..I ccan't ddo this anymore….oh God it hhurts"
"I know…..I know"
"I nneed ….oh sshiit DDanno, I need a ffix….I ccan't do this anymmorre…help mme please"
Steve's words terrified him "Relax buddy, slow down your breathing for me…..nice and slow babe, in…out…..in….out, relax…."
"I can't do itt…I'm ssorry…"
"You can. You're doing so great Steve…you CAN do this…I'm here, Cath's here…"
At the mention of Cath's name Steve began to sob hysterically, "No….no not Cath….ddon't ttell Cath Danno please"
Steve was pushing away and Danny grabbed him around the chest pulling him down onto his lap, "Hey stop, relax….she's sleeping babe"
"I nneed a ffix Danno….hhellp mme"
Steve clutched at the collar of Danny's t-shirt. His entire body was shaking as Danny held him tightly, trying to calm him "You don't need that crap Steve…you're strong, you're so damn strong. You're beating this shit Steven, you're winning"
Steve's eyes, God his eyes….Danny had never known anyone who could 'talk' with his eyes like Steve McGarrett could and right now those eyes were filled with agony and fear and Danny's heart was breaking for him.
"Danny…..oh God…..I hurttt so ffuckiing bad"
Danny grabbed Steve's free hand and squeezed it tightly, "I know….I know. I need you to relax for me babe, relax….ssshhhhh….. I've got you and I'm not going anywhere. Close your eyes for me, relax…sssssshhhhhhh"
"DDannyy….I'm ssorry"
"Ssssshhhhhhhhh, no more talk now. I need you to sleep and I'll be right here when you wake up partner…..ssshhhhhh"
Steve's voice shook, "Oh God…oh God"
Steve's eye's closed and while still holding his hand, Danny pulled the blanket up, tucking it tightly around him, "That a boy, I got you…sleep now"
Danny glanced at the doorway seeing Catherine standing there, tears running down her cheeks. He didn't know how long she had been there, or how much she had heard. Their eyes met and Catherine forced a smile. Blowing Danny a kiss, she mouthed the words 'thank you' and turning, she went back to the spare bedroom leaving Danny to tend to his ailing friend.
Almost half an hour passed before Steve's body began to relax in his arms. He released his grasp on Danny's shirt as exhaustion took him back under.
In the spare room Catherine laid on the bed, hugging a pillow and sobbing into it. She had seen Steve in pain before and she had seen him fight the demons of his past in nightmares, and then last night...But tonight she saw something that terrified her even more. The strongest, toughest man she had ever known was experiencing a pain and despair that she had never seen in him. He was pleading with Danny to give him meth….through her tears Cath prayed to God to give the man she loved the strength to keep fighting and she also thanked God for bringing Danny into his life.
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Danny didn't sleep as he continued to comfort Steve throughout the rest of the night. Steve would wake every twenty minutes or so as his body battled the pain. Danny heard Catherine go into the bathroom at about six thirty and the shower turned on. While it was still running Steve woke and Danny inquired, "How are you doing?"
He said weakly, "A little better…Danno, I'm sorry"
"What did we agree to man, I'm here and I'm, not going anywhere and you have NOTHING to be sorry for"
"I feel so weak…..thank you for not giving me more junk"
"How could I? You threw it all out, remember?"
"Oh yeah…..I did"
Danny looked at him seriously, "Steve, you DID throw it all out right?"
"Yes, yes I did Danny….I knew the cravings would get bad…I didn't want the shit around"
"That's good partner. I'm not surprised that even fucked up you still think logically"
Steve chuckled, "Sometimes…except when I'm talking to my dead buddies, right?"
Danny brushed a tear from Steve's cheek, "Hey, you're doing great Superman"
"I don't think that nickname applies to me anymore buddy"
"Don't sell yourself short babe. Hey, Catherine's in the shower, are you up to seeing her?"
"Not right now D'…...I want to try to sleep a bit if that's okay?"
"Of course it's okay, you're still the boss babe "
Steve moved off Danny's lap and with his help he was soon under the covers. As Danny left the room he stated, "Holler if you need me"
"I will Danno, thanks"
A short time later, Catherine joined Danny in the kitchen.
"Coffee Cath?"
"Yes, thank you"
He poured two cups and joined her at the table. "How are you doing?"
"Okay…..is he sleeping?"
"I hope so, he's tired. Cath…..how much did you hear last night?"
"I think I heard most of it. I was up using the bathroom…." Her lips quivered as she continued softly, "He didn't want to see me…. and God, Danny….he wanted more drugs"
She wiped the tears from her eyes as Danny responded, "Yeah…..he did. Cath, I've seen so many people go through withdrawal and it's brutal even when you're weaning off slowly. As you know, our boy can't do anything the slow way"
"He's in such pain Danny…..it's so hard to watch"
Danny took her hand in his and rubbed it gently, "Honey that's why he doesn't want to see you. He doesn't want to hurt you. Last night scared him to death"
"But I want to be there for him Danny"
"He knows that Cath. But you have to remember what I told you, his emotions are all over the place. He doesn't have control over that right now. We need to make things as…..I can't say easy, because he's in the toughest battle of his life…let's say we need to make things as 'calming' as possible and we have to be strong for him because whether he chooses to admit it or not, he's at his absolute weakest right now"
"I understand Danny….and I'll be there when he needs me. I want you to know something. Last night after seeing Steve in such despair, I cried and cried, but I also prayed for him and Danny, I thanked God that he has you to take care of him. Thank you dear friend"
Danny was overwhelmed by her words and he saw a side of Catherine Rollins he had never seen before, a soft, tender side and he saw a woman who he knew in his gut would someday marry that stubborn ass SEAL.
******* Hope you're still enjoying…HAPPY READING ! ********