Ch 16
A/N: Hey guys, I know this is a shorter chapter, but it's leading up to a much bigger one. Originally I had intended to put them together, but I realized that it would be way too long. So here's this one. As always please review.
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There was a gloomy atmosphere in the hospital that morning as Poppy and Victoria took inventory. It was the last day of the term and while all of the students, and secretly the staff, were excited to be getting out for the summer, it also meant the end of the year for Victoria apprenticing with Poppy. They both tried to keep going with their task, ignoring the inevitable, chatting easily, until Victoria brought up a new topic. "Hey Poppy, what's going on with you and Moody?" Victoria asked seemingly out of the blue.
Poppy nearly dropped the bottle of Calming Draught in her hand and turned to Victoria, "What on Earth are you talking about?"
"Well I never asked you on my birthday, because it didn't seem appropriate, but since this is our last day together I figured…" she trailed off.
Poppy set the bottle back on the shelf and took a seat on one of the cots. Sensing the change in the older witch's mood she joined her taking the cot across from her. Poppy smoothed an imaginary wrinkle out of her apron and started, "Moody and I were in the same year in school. We weren't exactly friends in school. That's not to say that we were enemies, just didn't socialize much."
Victoria watched as she shifted uncomfortably continuing, "When we left Hogwarts, of course, we didn't keep in touch. It wasn't until one day when I was apprenticing at St. Mungo's that he came in. He had been severely injured, his eye had been cursed. There was no way to save it. In truth for a time we didn't know if we would be able to save him."
Victoria could tell that this was a hard memory for Poppy and wanted to tell her that she didn't have to explain, but the words wouldn't come out. She was simply too curious as to how two people so different could possibly be so close. Instead Victoria chose to lay a comforting hand on Poppy's, giving her silent comfort. Poppy raised her head to Victoria's and smiled, "We were able to save him, but it took a long time. I would come in everyday and take care of him. One day we struck up a conversation. It was as innocent as can be, but it made me realize that there was more to him than just the gruff exterior. Once you got to know him he was actually kind, extremely protective, and funny. Who would have thought?"
Nodding Victoria smiled. She knew very well how kind and protective the man could be having spent a lot of time with him for the Order. She felt that it would be wrong to interrupt so she simply listened as Poppy continued, "Over the months that he was there we became good friends. It was all well and good until I started… having feelings for him. It was the first time that I'd actually seen him that way. They say that you can't choose who you fall for, and I believe that. I didn't feel that it would be appropriate for me to say anything so I dropped subtle hints. One way or another either he didn't understand, or he didn't feel the same way. We have remained friends ever since." She finished with a smile and a shrug.
After taking a moment to let everything sink in Victoria asked, "So that's it, you just gave up?"
Poppy chuckled rising from the cot, "Victoria, I'm from a different time than you. I can't just go up to him and say that I have feelings for him."
"Why not?" Victoria asked from her position still on the cot, watching Poppy pace the room. In the year that they'd spent together Poppy had shown many sides of her character, but this was new. "What would it hurt?"
"We are friends. I am not willing to jeopardize that." Poppy stated firmly.
Victoria shook her head getting up from the cot to stand in front of Poppy, "Poppy if you have feelings for the man what is stopping you? It surely can't make things worse. I know you already feel horrible not saying anything. Keeping that inside will only eat away at you."
Poppy looked at her curiously, it sounded like Victoria had some experience in that area. Choosing to ignore the thought for the time being Poppy shook her head, "It will never happen. Alastor and I are simply good friends and that will be as good as it will ever be." Poppy turned away from her and went back to a shelf and picking up a bottle. Seeing that Victoria didn't follow suit she looked back at the girl, a dejected look painted her face. "Come on, we have work to do."
Victoria silently went back to her task. She wanted to convince Poppy to follow her heart, but knew it was in vain.
…
A few hours later Poppy and Victoria had just finished doing their inventory when they heard the double doors open. They both looked up, thinking that it was presumably Tonks coming in with some random injury she'd just attained, getting in her last one before the summer holidays. Who they saw was a shock to both of them, it was Dumbledore. He smiled warmly at them as he entered the room, "Madam Pomfrey, Miss Knight, how has the last day of term treated you?"
"Quiet Professor," Victoria answered.
Poppy nodded in agreement, "Much too quiet if you ask me. It always worries me when we haven't seen one student all day."
Albus laughed, taking a seat on one of the cots, "I'm certain there is no cause for concern. The students are simply enjoying their last day in the castle before they return home."
Victoria turned away from him as he said this, biting back the tears that threatened to come out. Poppy laughed, "I certainly can't blame them, it is a beautiful day. So what brings you here Professor?"
"Ah, I was hoping we would get around to that," he said with a smile, even from where Victoria stood nearly on the other side of the room, she could see the twinkle in his eye. "I have come to ask Miss Knight a question."
She looked at him curiously, but crossed to his side of the room, "Ask away Professor."
"Miss Knight, I have recently received the resignation of my current Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher." He stated looking much too happy considering the news he was delivering.
"You mean Professor Hanscom? What happened?" Victoria asked taking a seat across from him.
Albus sighed, finally showing some sadness at having one of his teachers leave him, "Alas, he has decided to depart, he says that he misses being in the field. It is hard to get an Auror to accept the position, even harder to keep them."
"So what does this have to do with me?"
"Since Professor Hanscom has chosen to leave us, that means I have a vacancy on my staff. I was pondering the thought of having you take his place." His smile came back in full force as he said this.
She was stunned, "Me?!"
"Yes Miss Knight. I think you would do well in the position. Your years at the Leaky Cauldron have taught you more than you believe, and as memory serves you have had some experience." He said with a wink.
Poppy looked to her curiously, "Experience? When did you have experience?"
"Back home, it was nothing really." Victoria tried to cover quickly. "So you really want me to be the new DADA teacher?"
"I believe that is what I am offering, yes." He chuckled.
She couldn't get over the shock of what he was offering. DADA teacher, it wasn't something to take lightly. She looked to him finally, "Professor, while I'm extremely honored that you would consider me for the position, I don't think that I would be qualified."
He smiled, "I understand Miss Knight; however, I would urge you to consider it."
"I will but…"
"Then I will see you in my office in the morning. Good afternoon ladies."
…
After finishing with Poppy for the evening Victoria chose to take a walk around the grounds. She needed time to think things over and decided that fresh air would help. Stepping outside the castle she really didn't pay attention to where she was going. Before she knew it her feet had led her to the lake. Sitting down on the bank her mind started to wander. She couldn't understand how Dumbledore could possibly think she was qualified to be a teacher.
"I have no formal training. I have very little experience. I have never done half the things that most defense teachers have done. How can I teach something that I know so little about?" She spoke out loud to herself watching the ripples, caused by the giant squid, glide across the surface of the water.
"Sure, I did well in school with that class. Okay so I may have been top of my class, but does that mean I would know how to teach it? No! I met many different kinds of people, and creatures, at the Leaky Cauldron, but what does that prove? Just because I know some hags and vampires by name doesn't mean anything. And yes I did go to battle with Moody a few times. Well… maybe more than a few, but that was different. I had someone there to watch out for me, I was never alone. I can't do it." She sighed, hanging her head in defeat.
Sitting there for a few minutes, continuing to fight with herself in silence, she was startled when she felt something brush her leg. Looking up she saw what looked like a large cat. It had black and orange calico fur covering most of its body, but a white belly, and feet. The cat's tail was bushy, reminding her of a lion's. It looked up at her and let out a soft meow. She couldn't help but reach out to it and stroked its fur. A few strokes later she was greeted with a loud purr emanating from the cat. After a few moments Victoria heard someone behind her, turning to look she saw Hagrid. His shaggy beard and hair still just as wild as it was the first time she'd seen him. "Why Miss Victoria, you found a friend."
She chuckled lightly, looking down at her furry friend, "I guess I have."
"This little one got away from me when I was takin her to the castle. Professor Kettleburn wanted me to ask if anyone wanted one, we've got too many kneazles this year. Said Professor Sinestra had been talking about getting one, but I think this one's gotten attached to you." He watched as the cat laid down on her lap continuing to purr.
She smiled down at the little creature, "If you don't mind Hagrid, I could take this one off your hands."
"Don't mind at all. Helps me out actually. Got to find homes for bout ten more."
"Thank you Hagrid." She gave him a genuine smile, "I've always wanted one honestly. My parents were allergic."
"You're welcome. Got to be off now. Still gotta take one up to Professor Sinestra." He said patting his coat where she could hear some soft meowing coming from.
She watched him leave shaking her head. How the man could carry around wild animals in his coat never ceased to amaze her. Looking down at her new friend she smiled. The cat looked up at her with bright green eyes and meowed, sounding curious, if that was possible for a cat. "I think I'll name you Regina. How does that sound to you little one?"
The cat meowed again, and then started to purr. Victoria chuckled, "I'll take that as a yes."
…
That night as she got into bed, Regina curled up next to her arm. Victoria smiled and started to stroke her fur as she pulled the diary off of the bedside stand.
May 3, 1962
I just got a letter that may potentially change my entire life. I got a letter from him. I haven't heard anything from him in two years and now he decides to talk to me again. He said that he has an opening on his staff. I can't help but be flattered by the thought, but why did he think of me? It's true that I was the best in my class, but how many other people could say that. Yes I have been published, but all you have to do is send something in that's worth publishing and they will do it. I have been an Auror for the last two years, how does that make me competent to teach? I'm not happy with my current position. Being an Auror hasn't been what I imagined. It hasn't been all bad; the job is not exactly horrible. I have gotten to do many things, but I just don't feel as happy as I thought I would. I realize that this feeling is probably coming from something entirely different than my current position. I mean my best friend moved out of the flat a year ago, actually to go work at the school as their mediwitch. My father passed away a few months ago as well. He was always my rock. He was the person who kept me going. I loved him more than I can say. Although he was a Muggle he was the one always pushing me to do better in my work with magic. I still don't know how I keep going without him. I guess the biggest reason I'm not feeling as I should, would also be the easiest to figure out. I know it's been two years, but I still can't get over losing my little girl. I think about her every day. I probably wouldn't even recognize her now. She's probably gorgeous with those big blue eyes. I still can't help but think that it was the biggest mistake of my life to give her up. Enough about that now, there's nothing I can do about it. I just don't know if I can do it. I would love more than anything to be a teacher there, but how can I be? How can I see him again? You know, I should just do it. That's it! I'm going to do it. I'm going to ignore the fact that he and I were anything more than friends or student and teacher, and I'm going to go. I can be a teacher. I can! Ok, now only one thing left to do. I'm going to go send him a letter. I'm going to be the best Professor that school has ever seen, even if it means being better than he was.
Victoria smiled as she closed the book. She had possession of the diary now for nine years, but it had taken her this long to get to the last entry. There was something bittersweet about ending the book. It had become something like a security blanket for her. Placing it back on the nightstand she scratched Regina between the ears, getting rewarded with a purr, as she thought about what she'd read. She didn't expect to be reading what she had that night. How strange was it that the day Professor Dumbledore had come to her asking if she would be a professor that she would read this? It seemed as if this woman was going through exactly what she was. The only difference was that Victoria still couldn't see herself becoming a teacher. It was true that much like this woman, she wanted to do it, but she couldn't see how she was qualified to do it. Sighing she turned the lights out and tried to get some sleep, not that she thought she'd get much with the decision running through her head.
…
The next morning came to a bright start. Victoria was greeted by beautiful morning sunlight much earlier than was normal for her. She had spent most of the night sitting next to her window looking out over the grounds thinking. She knew it was almost time to go meet Professor Dumbledore to give him her decision, and she finally felt ready to do so. It was before breakfast that she found herself in front of his office. The gargoyle staring at her jumped out of her way as she said the password, "Fizzing Wizzbees", and jumped back into position as she stepped onto the stone escalator. Once the ride up was done she stood in front of a large oak door with a brass door knocker in the shape of a griffin on it. She hesitated for a moment before raising her hand and tapping the door knocker against the door. A moment later Dumbledore stood in front of her, smiling he said, "Good morning Miss Knight, please come in."
"Thank you Professor." She said entering the large office. Although she had been there a few times over the course of the year she still couldn't get over it. There always seemed to be some new gadget added to his collection.
"Please, have a seat. Would you like some tea?" He asked offering one of the chairs in front the fire.
"Would it be too much to ask for some coffee?" She asked shyly. No matter how long she had been in England, she still preferred coffee in the morning to tea.
He chuckled, "No problem at all." He conjured a cup for her and handed it to her. "I assume that you have considered my proposal than."
She took a sip and the set the cup down on the table next to her, "I have." She paused, she still wasn't sure if she was doing the right thing. "I will take the position sir."
He smiled at her, his eyes dancing merrily behind his glasses, "Excellent, I am very happy to hear it. I will need for you to return two weeks prior to the students so that you can get your lesson plans in order."
"Certainly sir." She nodded.
"What are your plans for the summer my dear?" He asked easily changing the subject.
She was surprised, but went along with it, "Oh, well Remus and I are going to take a trip to the States. I need to get my parents things from the Academy. It will be his first time to the States."
"How is Mr. Lupin doing? I have not heard from him in some time."
"Well, he just lost his job. They found out about his… condition. As usual they didn't trust people like him, which I don't understand since he's been with them for nearly eight years now. He's never been a problem this long, why would he be now?"
He didn't answer instead saying, "I hear that you have been making his Wolfsbane still."
"I have. How did you know?" She asked eyeing him curiously.
"Although Professor Snape had a change of heart, he did have his suspicions about you early in the year. I hope the lunascope came into good use to you this year. It was one of my favorite objects." He smiled at her taking another sip.
"So it was you! I wondered about that!"
"Indeed, I thought that it would come into more use to you than it has to me."
"It was a lifesaver." She answered honestly, "I almost forgot about it one month and it was the only way I remembered. Thank you so much."
"You are quite welcome. Come, we should get to breakfast before the others notice our absence."
She nodded, smiling she followed him out of his office. Now that she was going to be back next year, the day didn't seem quite so bad.