AN: Sorry for the long wait!
Song is: The reason by Hoobastank
Tony is not a perfect person. He knows that.
He hurt people. People who cared for him. He pushed them away, because he hadn't trusted anyone. Not really. He pushed away Rhodey. Not openly, but Rhodey wasn't stupid. He got it. He hurt Pepper. God, if he could take it back, he would do it in a heartbeat. But he can't. He can't change the way things went. Can't change the things he did and said.
He sits in his workshop, going over the scans for what felt like the thousands time. All of them say the same. He will die. The palladium in his arc reactor will kill him. And there is absolutely nothing he can do about it.
So he started thinking. He thought of everything. His parents, his one-night-stands, his parties, his robots and his weapons. And he thought of Pepper. Sweet, clever, trustworthy Pepper, the one woman in the world he knows he can trust regardlessly.
Tony knows that he loves her. He has known it ever since Afghanistan. But he could never tell her, never admit it to her. He didn't deserve a woman like Pepper. He wasn't a good man.
But he was learning. He was trying to become a better person. He was trying. And, he realized, he tried for only one reason: Pepper. She was his reason to stand up, to see her gorgeous face told him he wasn't alone. He somehow had found a reason for himself to change, and that reason was Pepper Potts.
And suddenly, Tony wanted that Pepper knew. He wanted to tell her he was dying, he wanted to tell her how sorry he was, he wanted to tell her he had changed, he wanted to tell her he loved her. He wanted her to know all these things before he had to go, before he would die. And he wanted more. He wanted to hold her, to take away all the pain he caused her, to take back all those ugly things he said to her, he wanted to be the one that catched her tears.
But he was going to die, and he had not much time. So he decided to write her a letter, saying all those things.
And then the computer blinked and he had an idea.
AN: This happens shortly before he discovers the new element. Tell me what you think!
PS: As always, ideas for songs are greatly welcomed!