CHAPTER 44

~ Disbanding Bond ~

pt.4

Jenni, "It's our Last Day!"

It is Sunday and that means a full day before having to leave Seaside the next morning. What better way to start the day, than GTL'in it a final time?

Deena stirs in her own bed groggily. It's been baby-steps but she is showing real progress. Last night and this morning was the first time back in her own bed, in the girls' room. She tried the night of the Bond Fire party but a disturbing nightmare brought her to bunk with Pauly upstairs. The panic attack she'd had that night at the beach led up to it as well.

Jenni responds again, "You goin to the gym this morning?"

Deena gets her wits and replies, "Yeah…I'm goin."

Jenni smiles and continues to get ready. Soon enough, she and Deena are the first out the door.

Meanwhile, the guys get a later start to their day. Pauly is always up first though. His immediate reaction upon waking up is, Where's Deena?

Pauly feels next to him, "Deena?"

He rubs his eyes and gets into focus. It takes him a minute but he then realizes that she fell asleep in her own bed last night. He remembers now because he checked on her before hitting it himself.

He nods his head in reassurance to himself. With a final yawn, it is time to get on with the process.

After everyone is fully awake, the remaining housemates decide to go GTL also. Vinny goes to find Pauly and finds him in their room upstairs on the outside deck.

Vinny slides the door back, "Hey, we're leavin soon. You comin?"

Pauly thinks about it for a minute and then he responds.

"Nah. Count me out this time bro."

The walls have come crashing down and hell has frozen over…Pauly is not going to GTL?! Vinny responds.

Vinny, "Are you kidding me? You know the first summer here I thought this was the most stupid thing ever. You would neva catch me near a tanning bed…but now I've learned to turn one on and you're a big part of that encouragement…"

Pauly smiles, "Happy to have that honor but I'm really not goin."

Vinny gives him the begging face but Pauly shakes his head and fixes his hand like he is holding a phone. He responds.

"I'm waitin for a phone call. I've got business to handle."

It takes a minute but Vinny gets it. He nods and smiles back at Pauly then he leaves him alone to leave out with Ronnie, Sammi, and Mike.

-After Tanning-

While at the Simply Sun tanning salon, Mike found out a bit of information that put a situation into what is supposed to be the last perfect day in the House. Now, all three are back and cannot wait to share the information with the other recipient.

They come in talking at once but then Vinny shares while sitting down.

"So, you're going to be upset about something."

Pauly, "Why?"

Vinny, "Paula fucked with that cake that she got Mike."

Not able to contain himself Ronnie jumps in and lays it out.

Ron, "Some guy put his balls on that cake."

They both continue talking at once.

Ron, "We saw pictures of like…the balls on the cake."

Pauly is looking at them stunned from the couch.

He responds, "Wowww…"

Pauly then goes off a little about how fucked up it is that she would do that, knowing Mike for so long.

All the commotion brings Deena into the front room.

Deena, "What happened?"

Ronnie then tells her and she gets a look on her face.

Deena, "I had a piece of it…"

They start laughing, everyone except Pauly. Mike doesn't really either but he responds.

"Figures you would eat it yo!"

After having enough of the humiliation, Mike goes to confront Paula for the truth. He goes to call her.

When he gets her on the line, she pretty much acts like she doesn't hear him. They go back and forth with hellos? Then Mike looses it after her using his phone game for the last time. He throws the duck phone and smashes it on the spot (R.I.P.).

Pauly responds seeing Mike walk in, "What happened?"

Mike says casually, "Disconnection."

It is now clear how Paula has taken the break up; Looks like the final Prank-War is a success and according to Ronnie, it goes to someone who doesn't even live in the Shore House.

Pauly, "How can someone ruin a cake?! I love cake…"

-The Next Morning-

The night before marked the housemates' last Sunday dinner. Everyone pitched in and helped out with the meal. Most of dinner and after was spent reminiscing over the past summers at the Shore. Everyone felt in his or her heart that they have come a long way since that first day and that even though they get judged from the outside, that no one will ever understand what they share inside their circle.

Today…is it. There is not a full day but there is always time for breakfast and for Pauly's antics. It is only fitting.

Pauly wakes up first as usual and goes into the kitchen for some pots. Now, he sounds off for the last time. First he hits Ronnie and Sammi's room, then he goes to his room for Vinny and Mike, next is Jenni's room, and last in the house just like the year before, he wakes Deena (this time he doesn't have to be careful about it though). Nicole is back at her house next door for the final day, so he sneaks over and wakes her as well.

Pauly, "OH YEAH, WAKE UP YEAH! OH YEAH, WAKE UP YEAH! OH YEAH, WAKE UP YEAH! LAST DAY YEAH!"

He immediately starts laughing at Nicole's expression and then he responds.

"That was the best one ever!"

Agreed.

BTSTH

Bacon, sausage, and ham are now frying, along with hash browns. The eggs are being flipped and the waffles and toast are being placed on the kitchen corner table, the condiments not far behind.

Deena takes her seat after helping, "The last Family breakfast!"

Everyone else followed suit and dug in after a word from Mike.

Now they are talking around the table after a hearty meal.

Vinny, "You guys are the best friends I've ever had."

Pauly echoes, "This is the biggest dysfunctional Family I've ever had!"

They laugh and Jenni replies.

"Yeah, who can forget that dysfunctional dinner?"

Nicole smiles and rolls her eyes, "The worst day of my life but…it's not hitting me at all that this is our last breakfast."

She continues.

"This is the last time together at this table and even being in this house together. It's crazy and to think that it's all over now is just…whaa."

Everyone agrees and Vinny responds.

Vinny, "Maybe one day our Kids will get their own Shore House together!"

Immediately Nicole and Deena laugh.

Nicole, "Well obviously me and Dee' already have two leading that pack for when it happens."

Mike responds. "Yeah uh, anyone else care to add to that…?"

He immediately looks at Sammi and Ronnie but Ronnie looks to Jenni.

Jenni laughing, "What are you lookin at me for?!"

Ron, "You know what, you're right. You and Rog' barely do enough to worry about that."

That earns him a laugh on the ongoing joke about Jenni always withholding sex from Roger. Jenni responds.

"It feels like we just moved in to our house together and we're already about to kill each other. I can't imagine adding a Kid into the mix. We'd be ready to divorce before even getting married."

Ronnie and Sammi smile at each other and she speaks up when it quiets down.

Sam, "Well, Ron and I have an announcement to make…"

Everyone freezes. With these two, anything could come flying out.

Sam smiles, "Ron and I are moving in together."

Well, that wasn't hard to figure out. Deena smiles and responds.

"Finally. Where to?"

Ron, "We found a sick apartment up in New York. We probably won't be moving until October though."

Everyone nods and Deena continues.

Deena, "Just make sure to let us know when the housewarming party is."

Sam, "Of course."

Last summer that would be a death null on the house but everyone has seen the change in Ron and Sam's relationship so it is welcomed with ease of mind.

Mike then decides to put a cap on breakfast.

Mike, "So we've got Ron and Sam movin in together, Nicole's here without child, yeah? Finally had little Lorenzo."

Nicole cheeses and leans into Jenni. Mike continues.

"I know my man Vin' has big plans after this. I'm still sober and don't plan on changing that…I don't know, we uh survived the craziest summer yet again at the Shore House…"

Before Mike can continue, Pauly beats on the table sending a little attention his way.

Pauly comes out with it, "Well, I got a house."

Vinny looks at him and Jenni frowns confused a little.

Jenni, "You got a house?"

Pauly smiling a little, "Yep. I put in a call to my man Biggie back at home to help me out. He knows a lot of real estate agents on the West Coast and…it's done."

Vinny replies,"So, you're moving?"

Pauly taps his fingers on the table, "Got the call the other day. The papers are waiting on me when I get back. I just need to sign off."

Deena looks at Pauly.

Ron responds, "I'm sorry, I blanked out. You got a house where? Did you say where?"

Pauly, "Didn't."

Pauly looks at Deena.

"I got a house in Vegas…and the offer is on the table for you and 'Leena to join me…"

-Packing Time-

In MVP's room, the guys talk.

Mike laughs a little, "That announcement rocked the house Pauly. Did you see Deena's face?"

Vinny, "Yeah. I already sort of knew from what we talked about and then you saying you were waiting for a call…but do you think she'll take you up on the offer bro?"

Pauly, "I don't know. That's up to her."

The guys shrug and Mike continues.

"Wow, well good luck with that. (Laughing a little) Just save me a guest room, so we can hit the strip when I come to town."

Vinny, "If Deena moves in, I think Pauly can kiss that goodbye."

Pauly scoffs, "Like I said before, no one can stop me from goin to work."

Pauly changes his expression to a coy smile and then Mike smirks. Vinny shakes his head.

Vinny takes a break from packing, standing up. "You know when I first came into this house I was like, how the fuck am I going to live with a bunch of tanned, muscled-bound, blow out haircut, chap stick wearing Guidos?"

Pauly comments, "So basically, you're saying you'd never think you'd be best friends with one now."

Vinny, "No, definitely not."

Pauly, "Never judge a book by its blow out."

Vinny laughs and they continue packing.

In the girls' room, Sammi comments to the others in the room.

"This sucks and it's terrible. We are packing everything up and leaving for the last time ever."

Deena responds after being quiet for the longest.

"We've had some good times in this room."

Jenni, "We really have."

It gets quiet again and then Deena hops up.

Deena, "Alright, well I'm gonna go see what Nicole needs help with next door."

The girls nod and when Deena leaves out, Jenni turns to Sammi.

"So…what do you think about what Pauly announced? Do you think she'll do it?"

Sam, "I don't know. It was hard to read Dee's reaction. They've been through the ringer this summer and that's coming from Ron and me. I know that sounds like a broken record."

Jenni, "It's just weird. I don't even know what to say about it. I don't know if she should or shouldn't."

Sam sighs, "Well, judging from the past few weeks, it wouldn't be a horribly bad decision. She's not getting along with her Mother and on her own, she seems unhappy. Not to mention with, what just happened, she doesn't want to be alone."

Jenni reflects Sammi's words but she still doesn't know what to think. She shrugs and they continue packing.

At Nicole's place, her last piece of luggage is placed by the door. The two Meatballs sit for a moment so Nicole can catch her breath.

Nicole sighs, "Well, this is it! Truly the end to our Meatball days."

Deena smiles, "I thought you said once you drop Lorenzo, you were still gonna party. Just because we leave here doesn't mean we can't still hang out."

Nicole, "Oh. Well, we can still do that but…you're right Dee'."

Deena, "Right about what?"

Nicole, "About finally seeing your baby. It's like nothing you can describe. I just want to be around him and be a Mother to him. It's just like Vegas, what happens at the Shore should stay at the Shore I feel."

Nicole laughs a little but her expression changes when she sees Deena's expression change from the smile that played on her lips. She thinks she knows why. She shifts positions on the small front room couch and focuses on Deena.

Nicole, "Remember back when you were pregnant with 'Leena and I said Pauly wasn't the right guy for you?"

That was blunt and straight to the point. Deena just nods her head yes. Nicole continues.

"I talked to Jenni about this too and she asked me if I told you but I just didn't know how to word it to you at the time until now. (Thinking) Well, with everything that has happened with Chris, I just wanna say that I take back my statement."

Nicole goes on, "I've watched you and Pauly the short time I've been back and Pauly has turned an one-eighty around you. It's the most focused I've seen of him towards you. I don't know what you did to the guy."

Deena wishes she could tell Nicole the reason being but she just lets her finish. It is not the time now.

"You went on and on about Chris and how good a boyfriend he is; I think Chris is a good guy but truthfully I was only going along with it because you were happy about it."

Nicole Sighs, "As much as I'm afraid to admit it, it will always be Pauly…it always has been."

Deena looks to Nicole now.

Nicole, "I don't know what will happen after this, but do it. Go with Pauly and give it a shot Dee'."

Deena pauses, "…Really?"

Nicole, "Really. Pauly gets you so you might as well go with it like I said."

This really throws Deena off. She wasn't expecting this from Nicole but it feels good after not really getting any feedback about the surprise decision, that she's already somewhat known about since the Bond Fire, coming from the man she really does love. She buried her feelings since being with Chris but the truth really does set a person free.

Deena, "That's a big weight off coming from you momma."

Nicole nods and stands up. They both walk to the front door shoulder to shoulder. Nicole laughs a little thinking about one of their nicknames for each other now, momma.

Nicole, "You know, I hate to say it but Mike was actually right about one thing, that everyone in the house would be knocked up by this summer."

Deena laughs with her. They know it's not everyone but the two of them counts as enough.

Deena, "I have to ask. Did you know you were preggers back when I just had 'Leena that day at the hospital?"

Nicole looks innocent smiling, "Absolutely…and then some."

Deena smiles and shakes her head, never responding after that but she is concentrating on what she now knows she has to do. She doesn't know it but this is reminiscent to when Vinny and Pauly had their talk at the end of last year, on the last night at the Shore House.

Back in the house, everyone has dragged his or her luggage down and Deena has taken a seat in the front room on the small couch. She sent Vinny over to Nicole's by request to help her load her truck up with her luggage. Right now she is just looking over in the direction of the memorabilia everyone has left for the House, (signed) graffiti and everything. She is the first one completely ready to go…well, second one.

Pauly comes down and sees Deena. He is about to walk past but he decides to sit with her. Deena doesn't even ignore him, she just laughs a little.

"Here we are again. Last day and together again."

Pauly, "Yep. (Thinking) Damn…I didn't think this day would even be here though, with all our suitcases laid out here in front. It's like, we leave every year but this time we ain't comin back."

Deena nods in agreement and it gets quiet. Pauly then looks at her.

Pauly, "So uh…big shocker this morning. I mean, not for you because I already told your Parents at the Bond Fire that you're coming with me."

Deena looks down and crosses her legs.

"Yeah, thanks for that. I don't think I can go home now."

Pauly, "So none of this sinks in with you…?

Deena, "Well you really didn't ask me until this morning and it wasn't even you asking…you put it in my lap to make the decision, saying me and 'Leena are free to join you. What about our court agreements? It makes things really complicated."

Pauly, "Look, it's not even a decision you have to make like right now. Even after I sign the papers, the house still won't be ready for me to move into right away."

Deena shakes her head, not really mad but just unbelieving.

Deena, "I think this is some cruel joke. You know, last summer we were in this same position but you were the one who wasn't sure about moving in together. Now the tables are turned."

Pauly, "So you don't want to do it is what you're sayin?"

Deena sighs and responds.

"We're not even together Pauly."

Pauly frowns a little, "Okay, now I'm confused. What are we talkin about here?"

Deena scoffs and bites her bottom lip. Pauly continues.

Pauly, "What do you want Deena?"

In moments, Deena moves to cover Pauly's lips. Now, everyone talked about the kiss that rocked the club that night in Italy but even though denying it and acting regretful, Pauly already knew then what he knows now.

Deena places her tiny hand on Pauly's now beefed up chest inching herself closer as Pauly's hand starts to wander. Deena is wearing a wrap dress that she's worn before but that was before everything sitting in the right places now.

Before things can intensify any further, they hear movement coming and they stop. Jenni comes in the room and the time has come for everyone to head outside for the final loading. Pauly and Deena get up already winded as their chests rise and fall from their emotional energy spent. Neither one looks at the other after their quiet bond just shared.

-Final Goodbyes-

Everyone is locked and loaded and they join up with each other for a group hug. Within the circle each one shares their sentiments: the highs, the lows, the ups, the downs, JAIL, and the love that has grown with each year.

Vinny looks up and speaks.

"Look at that house yo…"

Everyone turns to look at what has been their home away from home for three years now. Nicole is the one to start the water brigade (Hormones).

Sam, "Oh Nicole, don't."

Deena smiles completely relating, "Yeah. Definitely me last year."

They try to laugh it off but it doesn't work.

Pauly trying his hardest, "Yo, I don't cry…I laugh!"

Vinny, "My eye is itchy right now…"

He takes off his glasses and Pauly comments.

Pauly, "It's not fuckin pink eye again is it?"

Everyone laughs and then Deena points to Mike.

Deena, "Mike. Are you crying?"

Mike smiles a little, "No."

He then wipes a tear real quick and Ronnie responds.

"Holy shit! He has a heart."

After another round of laughs things turn bittersweet, as Jenni is now the last to speak.

"You know, I thought my life was over the first time I stepped foot into this house…but now it has turned everything around to where; I found a great guy, Family, and now everything is perfect because of being here. (Crying again) So it sucks that we're leaving…"

Jenni can't even get out the for good but everyone knows what she is getting at, because it has been felt over and over since finding out they would never be back.

Around the area houses, people start to gather a little by the streets as the group disbands to get in their cars and SUV's. Ronnie is driving him and Sammi of course, Nicole and Jenni are riding together, and the guys all have their separate vehicles along with Deena.

The girls hug each other one last time and are left momentarily when Nicole goes up to Deena.

Nicole, "So I know you drove here but…are you trailing anybody anywhere or is it home permanently?"

She is trying to be discreet about it but the other girls walk up hearing it. They look at Deena in anticipation and Deena turns her head to look in the opposite direction.

It is as if their minds are one. Pauly opens the door to his Escalade and he turns around, locking eyes with Deena. They converse with their eyes for a moment, sending a chilling response all over Deena's body.

She grunts and sighs to herself, turning back to the girls. She simply responds.

"Home will be wherever the Meatballs are."

Jenni and Sammi just look at Deena. They are thinking that this is not the time to be philosophical but Nicole grins at her. Deena smiles back and heads to her car.

The girls look at Pauly now but they cannot get anything out of him because he is already getting in his SUV. However, based on Nicole's laughter now and the last look they see Deena send in Pauly's direction, something has been formulated.

All they can hope for at this point is that it does not end in a phone call to free Deena or Pauly. In the words summed up by Nicole, some memories are best left at the Shore.

Everyone is now in his or her car and the street is lined with Seaside fans as every car gets in line to leave. Sammi can hardly even look up to wave to everyone; the tears are steadily streaming down her face as Ron holds her hand from the driver's side.

Mike looks thoughtfully at his surroundings remaining calm and collective. He made mention that this is the clearest his mind has been coming into the House and now, he has the same clarity leaving. Although a dark road in the past, he feels he has found his way.

Vinny cannot stop smiling. Never in a million years did he think his life would literally turn around. He has an entirely different spirit. It is sad they're leaving, yes, but because of being in the House he has found himself.

Nicole and Jenni are the last to complete the trail. Neither of them has anything to say because they already know what incredible bond this House has given them. Jenni looks over at Nicole and remembers the first day she walked into the house. She shared laughs with Vinny over how ridiculous the then petite girl looked. She was unreal to them.

Now, Jenni sees the mature beautiful woman that Nicole has grown into.

Jenni ribs Jionni and gives him a hard time and she questions their relationship sometimes but in actuality, she hopes that her relationship with Roger turns into what Nicole and Jionni's has flourished to.

Nicole looks to her right and left while driving away from the House. All of these people have grown to love them year in and year out. She wishes everyone could just love and respect them like the love the housemates have for each other. She knows people judge her for having a baby and for eventually getting married but who are they to do so? She didn't ask to come into this House and live under a microscope in the public eye. However, there was one person who had her back since day one. She looks briefly over at her before looking forward again. You cannot tell her that there are no such things as Soul Mates. Not romantically but she and Jenni were meant to find each other. She can't see her life without her so Roger still won't have Jenni to himself in the house because Nicole is inseparable at this point from her best friend.

A little laughter comes from the car in front Jenni and Nicole. Deena looks in her rear view mirror as Nicole honks her horn. She doesn't know if it's from her driving a little slower than the pack or if she's acknowledging the crowd. Either way, she has to laugh to keep from crying.

Deena has no way whatsoever the words to even sum up this summer. If she could choose one description it would probably begin with a four-letter word. Nothing gelled and when it did, it would fall apart. One would think her first summer in Seaside would be this way but she peaked later than the rest of her housemates because of not being there as long as they have.

She knows she has a long road ahead of her because of her choices but in order for history not to repeat itself, she has to continue to fight through. In her darkest hours in the last few weeks, all sorts of conversations ran through her head; why did I come back? Why does everything I do or everything I love turn to sh*t? Why me? Why now? Why, why, why…?

Deena thought about ending it all but in a ray of light, she caught a glimpse of Pauleena in a picture in the corner of her eye while lying in bed one morning. It's because of the House that she is even here. She is Deena's why…and that why is stronger than anything that has been thrown at her, so Deena has to live her life for her no matter what happens. She wipes tears.

…I doubt anyone could think that their life is more perfect than one's own spiked and gelled hair. Pauly leads the caravan assured as he always seems to be. For him, all good things must come to an end but nothing is ever truly over.

He will be the first to admit that this summer was truly a test for him. However, it is the memories in the House he will hold onto that will be his reference to look back on to guide him in life.

Talk about burning bridges. Pauly looks back though at the skyline and the clouds break, allowing the sun to shine through as he now crosses the Shore Bridge for the last time. He utters words of respect for the place and the people that have changed his life.

"Damn Seaside…Goodbye. Rain or shine, I'll always call you home. I'm gonna miss ya and thanks for everything…for real!"

~BTSTH~

*Continue with my ending music choice: "The Road", In This Moment*