101 Ways To Kill Jar Jar Binks
Chapter 13: Machete
Our heroes (possibly anti-heroes, considering some of the methods that they've used to kill Jar Jar Binks were brutal) have decided to go to a camp for their vacation. Little did they know who this camp is home to…
"So, why'd you decide to take us to camp, Obi-Wan?" asked Anakin Skywalker.
"I felt like you deserved a break after all your hard jedi training." replied Obi-Wan Kenobi.
"Alright, if you say so." shrugged Anakin.
Obi-Wan Kenobi showed Anakin and Padme around the camp, simply so that they would know the things they could do while they were there.
Our heroes decided to enjoy themselves on their trip by going for a swim (both fanboys and fangirls celebrated when they saw Anakin Skywalker shirtless and Padme Amidala wearing a bikini).
After that was done, our heroes decided to have some lunch…when they realized that Jar Jar Binks had stowed away with them.
"Mesa so happy to see yousa!" squealed Jar Jar Binks.
Our heroes groaned with frustration, but decided not to kill him as they did before and instead put up with him for the time being so that they could enjoy their time at camp.
For a while (even with Jar Jar Binks) around, it seemed that everything was fine, and that there was nothing wrong with the camp whatsoever.
That is, until night came by…
Jar Jar Binks, needing to use the bathroom, decided to simply take a leak in the woods.
Little did they know that at that moment someone was watching him…
But Jar Jar Binks did not trust his instincts, and instead continued to do his business.
Until suddenly, someone came behind him and stabbed him with the back with a machete, which suffice to say proved lethal.
"Who stabbed mesa?" wondered Jar Jar Binks. Not long afterwards, he fell on the floor, dead.
But the serial killer was not done yet. He proceeded to leave the woods. Donning his hockey mask, he started to look around the camp for anyone else that made the mistake of going there during Friday the 13th.
He found Obi-Wan Kenobi sleeping first, and proceeded to snap his neck, killing him instantly, not unlike what he had done to Jar Jar.
This woke up Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala, who heard Obi-Wan Kenobi die. Rapidly noticing that there was a psycho wearing a hockey mask and wielding a machete on the loose, they screamed and proceeded to run out of their tent, trying to escape the heartless killer.
Things looked bleak until our heroes hid underwater using makeshift breathing apparatus. As it turns out, this particular serial killer was hydrophobic, and he stayed far away from the lake that had once drowned him.
The next day, Anakin and Padme used the resurrection book to resurrect Obi-Wan Kenobi. They found Jar Jar Binks' dead body as well, so they resurrected him using the same book as well.
They decided not to hang around at the camp anymore, knowing that the man with the hockey mask was possibly still around, and they left using their space vehicle to head back to the galaxy.
I hope you enjoyed this chapter featuring a certain horror icon that you may or may not have heard of….although it's most likely the former….Coincidentally, this is the second chapter in the row in which Obi-Wan Kenobi has died…will he do so any more times in the future? Will someone else perish as well? You'll have to find out in the next chapter in the 101 Ways To Kill Jar Jar Binks….