101 Ways To Kill Jar Jar Binks
Since my fans suggested it, and it was an idea I actually thought of myself, I'm going to kill Jar Jar Binks by using Jabba the Hutt. I hope you enjoy watching the Gungan becoming his dinner. I certainly will.
Chapter 30: Jabba the Hutt
Jabba the Hutt sat on his throne next to his half-naked slave girls who were currently dancing to his lustful delight, waiting for his delicious supper to arrive.
Porcellus said that he would arrive with dinner for Jabba in just a minute, but he simply could not wait that long. He wanted food now! He was starving!
Suddenly, his majordomo Bib Fortuna came by, stating that a strange package had been delivered toward him by an unknown organization. Jabba the Hutt decided to accept the package despite the likelihood of it containing a bomb (as many hated the Hutt, including his own minions), wondering what was inside.
Soon enough Jar Jar Binks jumped straight out of the package despite being stuffed in it for so long; glad to be finally free from his long stay inside. Surprisingly, he had not died from the lack of oxygen, and was still alive and well.
"Hey? Where is mesa?" wondered Jar Jar Binks as he looked around him. The last thing he had remembered was being stuffed inside a package and being sent somewhere else in the galaxy. Now he appeared to be in a castle of some kind. Where could he possibly be?
As it turned out, Jabba's Palace was the shuttle's final destination, and where Jar Jar Binks would die once more.
Jar Jar Binks looked at Jabba the Hutt rather curiously. "Wow, yousa one fat slug!" Jar Jar Binks expressed his thoughts, insulting Jabba in the process.
Almost immediately, every black-hearted scoundrel started to feel annoyed at the Gungan as he continued doing things that disturbed them. Eventually said annoyance turned to hatred, and they began plotting against Jar Jar Binks more than they plotted against Jabba the Hutt.
Eventually, the last straw came when Jar Jar Binks broke one of Jabba the Hutt's stolen treasures, which as it turns out was a priceless artifact. The intergalactic crime lord was enraged.
Suddenly, he noticed that Jar Jar Binks would make a fine snack for him, given that Gungans were an amphibious species.
Suddenly, Jabba's appetite and his temper both gave in at once, and he proceeded to swallow Jar Jar Binks whole and into his enormous mouth. He licked his lips shortly afterwards, and let out a large burp that shook the palace to its foundations.
"Whoa! Mesa must have been swallowed!" Jar Jar Binks realized. Soon enough, digestion set in for the helpless Gungan, and Jar Jar Binks died from the vast quantity of stomach acid inside the giant slug.
Porcellus's dinner came by shortly afterwards after Jabba the Hutt had finished eating Jar Jar.
"Took you look enough!" the crime lord stated as he began feasting on his meal, still hungry after eating the Gungan that even he thought was evil.
The members of the Anti-Jar Jar Binks Organization read from the resurrection book a few minutes later, causing Jabba to suddenly regurgitate Jar Jar Binks' carcass as it suddenly came back to life.
The Anti-Jar Jar Binks Organization then broke into Jabba's Palace and picked up Jar Jar Binks, taking him back towards his "friends", allowing them to plot nastier schemes against the Gungan that would lead to more gruesome fates for the designated victim.
In fact, several of the criminals that had developed a vendetta against Jar Jar Binks decided to leave Jabba's employ in order to assist the organization in whatever they wanted to do to the Gungan, although the enormous blob did not notice.
That's right, Jar Jar Binks became Jabba the Hutt's dinner! Fitting, since he enjoys eating amphibians…anyways in the next chapter our heroes will once again resume executing Jar Jar Binks for the galaxy and save the universe! Sort of.
Once again, I'm always up for suggestions…I'll be choosing new methods of deaths for the next few chapters…so I certainly hope that you enjoy them and laugh as Jar Jar Binks repeatedly dies.