Atem only had one person to turn to. Whenever he had a problem, he could always go to Mahad. There was no one in the world he trusted more; but that was no longer an option. However, he couldn't go to just anyone with this information. He could risk his entire reputation, and that was not something he could afford as the prince of Egypt. He sighed as he reached the door he was looking for, trying to pull himself together before he knocked. He only had to rap on it once before it flung open.
"Atem! What are you doing here?" Mana asked sweetly, gesturing for the prince to come inside. He entered the room she occupied in the palace and plopped down on the couch, mentally exhausted. "Is something wrong, my prince?" She fetched them both some water before sitting down beside him.
"Mana, you and I have been friends for a long time, and I value that friendship. I hope that you would come to me if you had a problem. Do you feel the same way?" Atem questioned, his eyes pleading with her for help.
"Of course! Always! What is it?" Mana was concerned now. She was flattered he came to her, but she knew Atem almost always went to Mahad for advice first. Why would he bypass his best friend? What couldn't he tell him?
Atem took a sip of water, trying to calm his nerves. "Mana, I think Mahad…has feelings for me." He waited for her reaction, but she simply smiled.
"So you found out. I figured it would be sooner or later. He's a lot more obvious than he realizes. I had it figured out ages ago. He didn't tell you himself did he?"
"You knew? Mana you should have said something to me earlier!" Atem burst out.
"I promised Mahad I wouldn't tell! It wasn't my business." Mana blushed in embarrassment as the prince raised an eyebrow at her, giving her a look that said he knew she was the nosiest person ever born, and someone who couldn't hold in what she found out for long. "This was Mahad, Atem, and a very serious secret. I wasn't going to give it away."
"I understand. You are a good friend for keeping your promise." He gave her a small smile, knowing that coming to her hadn't been a mistake. She wouldn't give away his secrets either. "No, Mahad didn't tell me. I had an inkling myself, but I didn't fully realize until…" He trailed off. Did he want to tell her about Seto? She was one of his best friends, but she was also one of Mahad's best friends. If she found out that he kissed someone else, knowing how Mahad felt about him, she would hate him.
Seto kissing him was completely unexpected and hardly Atem's fault. I kissed him back, though. The thought ran through his mind and knotted his stomach. Seto frustrated him with his arrogance but Atem couldn't help but admire his determination. Everyone in Atem's life was subservient to him, doing everything he wished because he was the prince. Seto was different and that intrigued him; he clearly respected the idea that Atem was his ruler and he would never undermine that, but he wasn't afraid to challenge him. There was also the fact that he had never seen anyone more beautiful in his life; there was no female who had ever captured him like Seto had. The prince couldn't deny his attraction to the guardian. What did this mean for him? What did it mean for Mahad? Things had been happening so fast that he hadn't even had time to consider his feelings for his friend yet.
"Atem…ATEM!" Mana nudged the prince, sending him out of his daydream. "Until what?"
"Until last night after the feast." He couldn't tell her. Not yet. He needed time to think things over. Of course Mana begged for more details. Now that he realized how Mahad felt, he understood what happened in the hallway the night before and would use it as a cover in the mean time. "Mahad and I discussed my father's wishes to place Seto at my right hand when I become pharaoh. I let him know that no matter what happens he is always going to be at my side. Then…I think he…tried to kiss me."
"Wait, what? You think he tried? How does that even happen?" Mana had shifted closer to Atem, her eyes wide with intrigue.
"Well he leaned in, and I wasn't sure what he was doing, but then he just said he had to go and practically ran away. I was confused at first, but I am positive that is what he was thinking of doing now." He saw that Mana was almost bursting with excitement. "Um, Mana, can I ask you something? Don't you find this odd at all? Mahad and I, we are your two best male friends. If people knew…"
"Yes, you and Mahad are my best friends, and if being together makes you happy, then that makes me happy. Honestly, I think it's adorable." She smiled widely and hugged the prince.
"I'm not sure what I want, Mana. This is all too new," he sighed, embracing his friend tightly.
"Then that's ok too. I know how Mahad feels, but if you don't feel the same way, I'm not going to hate you." She pulled back and stood, holding out her hand to help him up. "Go talk to him, Atem. He's obviously feeling very lost right now and he needs you, no matter how you want to be there for him."
Atem stood and nodded, knowing she was right. "I will. Thank you, Mana, for everything." He smiled at her and walked out the door. He was still confused, but having Mana's support gave him confidence. He was ready to face Mahad.
The prince stood outside the door of a friend for the second time today. All the confidence he had when he was with Mana seemed to dissipate with every step toward Mahad. He knocked quietly on the door, almost hoping that the magician wouldn't hear so he could simply walk away. However, the door opened and there stood Mahad. He didn't look well.
"My prince! Please, come in. To what do I owe this visit?" Mahad asked as he ushered his friend through the door.
Atem swallowed hard and then looked the magician in the eyes. "Mahad, we need to talk, and I think you know what we need to talk about."
Mahad grew deathly pale at Atem's words. The prince knew; that had to be it. Of course he did with the way he had made such a fool out of himself the night before. How was he going to explain himself, or ever be friends with Atem again? He slumped down on his bed, his heart racing. "I-I think I do know, but I want to hear you say it."
Atem sat down on the bed beside Mahad, surveying his friend. The magician looked like he was going to be ill, and Atem found himself grabbing Mahad's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. He hated seeing someone he cared about so much feeling so distraught. Mahad's hand was warm and Atem was almost grateful for the contact between them; feeling his friend with him somehow made things easier. "Mahad, you have feelings for me, don't you?" He noticed the magician's gray eyes were filled with humiliation, tears welling up in the corners. He had never seen his friend display so much emotion and it broke his heart. He reached up and gently wiped the tears away with his free hand.
Mahad shuddered at the touch. He sighed and gathered up every ounce of courage he had to get through what he needed to say. "Atem, ever since we were young, I knew you were special to me. My feelings grew so much over the years as I watched the strong, kind, generous person you became and…I know how wrong this is, but I…I love you, Atem."
Atem found tears coming into his eyes too. "You…love me?" He knew Mahad was attracted to him, but he was in love with him? He was surprisingly touched. The idea of Mahad being in love with him didn't even shock him; they had been together their whole lives and had always loved each other as brothers. It felt as if it was almost a logical place for their feeling for each other to grow into. He couldn't imagine life without Mahad. He was the most important person in his life. "Mahad, this is too new for me to be able to say how I feel yet, but…I cannot say that there is nothing between us." He held the magician's hand tighter.
"What? You're serious? I…never thought…" His fear slipped away as he began to realize that Atem was not only not going to push him away, but he admitted to having similar feelings. "But my prince, even if you ignore our genders, you are the prince of Egypt, and I am but your servant. Someday soon you will have to choose a suitable wife. The circumstances are just…impossible."
"You are thinking too far ahead, Mahad. I am not even sure of my own emotions right now." Atem pulled his hand away, suddenly thinking of Seto. He couldn't get Mahad's hopes up when someone else still lingered in his mind. He felt Mahad put a hand on his leg.
"You're right, and if you need time, take as much as you need. You don't know what it means to me that you would even consider being with me." He ran his fingers along the prince's thigh absent-mindedly. "I would wait for you forever, Atem." He slowly leaned toward the prince and kissed him softly. "I-I'm sorry my prince," he said as he quickly pulled back, his face reddening.
Atem brought a hand up to his face and lightly touched his lips where Mahad's had just been. He looked at the magician and crawled onto his lap, pushing him against the pillows on the bed. "Don't apologize. Kiss me again," he whispered.
Mahad wrapped his arms around Atem, pulling him in for another kiss. It was slow and gentle, but Atem could feel the magician's longing and emotions behind it. It was so unlike kissing Seto, though it was amazing in a completely different way. There was familiarity to it rather than ferocity. The magician's soft lips tasted so sweet. Atem let out a soft moan as Mahad's hands drifted down his back further, pulling him in as close as he could. He tangled his hands in Mahad's long hair as his kissed the magician harder.
Mahad could hardly believe what was happening. Kissing Atem was better than he ever imagined and he couldn't get enough. "Atem, stay with me tonight," he whispered breathlessly into the prince's ear. He knew what he asked was bold, but his mind was so consumed with Atem that he didn't want him to leave.
"Mahad, you know I can't," Atem pulled back, his hands locked behind Mahad's neck. "The servants talk. What would they say if I didn't come back to my room?"
"You are their prince. They wouldn't betray you if you asked them. Besides, you don't have to tell them the truth about where you were." He leaned in and kissed Atem's neck.
Atem was torn. He wanted to stay, to see if he could discover how deep his feelings for the magician ran, but it was a dangerous risk. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes as he felt Mahad's lips on his neck, swaying his decision. "All right, I will stay with you," he said, opening his eyes and grinning at the magician. He realized exactly how beautiful Mahad was; the pale moonlight filtered in through the window, illuminating his tanned skin and sparkling in the smoky depths of his eyes. He softly stroked the magician's cheek and kissed him one last time before reaching behind them to snatch the sheets. He laid himself down on Mahad's chest and heaved a sigh, settling in against the warmth of his friend's body. He was sleepier than he realized; it had been a long day, after all, and he would have much to think about in the morning. For now he put all thoughts out of his mind and concentrated on simply laying with Mahad. Soon he was fast asleep.
Mahad ran a hand through multi-colored hair, smiling lovingly at Atem. "Sweet dreams, my prince." He lay back against the pillows, silently praising the gods for his good fortune. For the first night in a long time, he slept soundly and peacefully.
Finally got this chapter up! Moving into school took away a lot of my time for writing :( For all you Seto fans out there, don't fear! Atem's little indiscretion will not go unnoticed and Seto will surely be ready to retaliate ;) Since I'll be busy with homework my updates will come less frequently, but I promise I'll keep them coming. Thank you all so much for your reviews! You guys are the greatest motivation I have and I absolutely love hearing your reactions :D