"This is Doctor Quinzel with The Joker, Patient 2997. Today's date is September 17th, session one..."

"Popping your cherry am I?" I had to laugh at the young blonde in front of me. She looks up from her notes that are scattered over the table. She was blushing heavily as if she were naked in front of her colleagues. "I gotta say I didn't except the old doc to hurry the process like this. What, two days? I'm impressed!"

"Well, it's not every day a patient requests a certain..."

"Oh I didn't request anything doc, I demanded!" I growled and stared deeply into her baby blues. The doctor quickly dropped her gaze to her notes which where blank of course. I can see you, yes you in there! Buried deep under that... silly little...act you try to pull. Once she regained composure, the young doc lifted her beautiful face to me.

"How are you feeling today Mr. Joker?" Hold the phone...

"What did you just call me?"

"Urm... Mr. Joker" Doctor Quinzel said slowly as she feared it annoyed me.

"Why not 'patient 2997'?" I ask rolling my eyes at the name all the doctors called me, all except for her.

"I...urm..." the pretty blonde seems to shake a little. "Would you prefer patient 2997?" I tutted at her question.

"No! But you haven't answered my question, which was very rude of you!" Then suddenly I see something change in her eyes.

"Well to answer your question, I don't like referring to my patients as a number. How am I supposes to communicate with you when I call you a number like you are nothing but a statistic. That's no way to start a foundation to work on." To tell the truth, her answer surprised me. I slowly raise my hands and applause her.

"Very nice doc and if you don't mind me saying, a very beautiful one you are." Silence filled the room for a minute, boring the hell out of me until she finally got over my comment.

"You never answered my question"

"And what was that toots?"

"How are you feeling today?"

"Better now I have seen your pretty little self"

"Is that why you asked for me?" Oh, looks like I've pissed someone off... Hell, she looks hot even when she's angry!

"No... that isn't why..." I slowly lick my dry lips. "But it is a plus side!" I roared.

"Why did you then?"

"Tut tut tut... That's for another time doll face"

"Then tell me why you do the things you do?"

"Why don't you tell me why I do the things I do?" This threw her and I knew it, that's why I asked her. Let's see how smart the brain is under that blonde hair!

"Others would say you do it for fame, money and power. But I don't think you do" It took her mere seconds to reply.

"I KNOW what OTHERS think but I what to KNOW what YOU think!" I growled again.

"Well ok..." doc took an unneeded deep breath and stared into my eyes "I think you do what you do to stand out from the crowd. To show the world your doings like some sideshow filled with wicked humour. As if you where trying to show the world something"

"And what would be that something?"

"That is what I want to find out"

"So you're not here to 'cure' me?" I made quote marks with my fingers as I spoke that silly word.

"Oh I'm here to do that too"

"HA!" I yelled making her jump from her skin. "I like you doc but you have a long way to go"

"What do you mean?" Too soon for that cupcake, too soon! Then something crossed his mind that bothered him deeply.

"What's your name?" I ask sincerely.

"It's Doctor Quinzel..."

"No no no, what's your first name?" Dumb bint!

"I'm afraid I am not allowed to share that information with you..."

"Then what was all that shit about 'a foundation to work on' if I don't even know your fucking name?" My swearing scared her a little but she dealt with it.

"Ok, it's Harleen"

"Harleen Quinzel?"

"Yes that is my name" I thought of her name in my mind. Harleen Quinzel... Harleen... Harley... Quinzel... Then it hit me and my side spilt as I roared. "What? Does my name amuse you?" She asked as her eyes shined with hurt. I stop with a smile on my face and look at them baby blues. So beautiful.

"Harleen Quinzel. It's ok but it's not you," that shuck her up and removed the look of hurt. "Now if we take that and mix it up a bit you get... Harley Quinn!" My scares picked up as I smiled brightly.

"As in harlequin? The famous clown figure?" She asked confused.

"The one and only" I could see Harley thinking over the name in her mind but what next really surprised me. Harley began to laugh.

"You know, I have never heard that before" she laughed.

"Harley Quinn, I like it, it brings a smile to my face!" I laugh along as I trace the scares on my face with my fingers making her laugh even more. Her eyes shined so bright, her smile was pure pleasure. I have never seen anything like that in my whole life. Harley slowly stop laughing and looked at me with a smile on her face, making my heart sink a little.

"What's your name Joker?" She had to ask didn't she! I stopped laughing instantly which caused her to wipe that smile off her face.

"Oh Harley... still reading questions off that stupid piece of paper?" She bowed her head low, as if a child was being told off. Damn that is adorable! "And after we got so far too," I huff. "Do you know how many doctors I have had Harley?" She shakes her head which was still hung low. "They all ask me the same, old, boring questions. Over and over! Like a broken record on repeat. Name? Age? Bad childhood? Fears? Blah blah blah blah blah!" I wave my heads around wildly making the chains around my wrist jingle. "Why don't you ask me something you ACTUALLY want to know and not the suits upstairs? It's ALLLLL about the suits!" If I thought Harley surprised me before, I was wrong. She simply picked up the paper of questions and ripped it into pieces in front of me. I was too shocked to laugh; all I could do was stare. Most doctors would have ran a mile by now. Who are you Harley Quinn?

"You see Mr Joker, I don't care if 'the suits' don't get there answers. I care about the well-being of my patients and not just the one hour that I meet them for but for the whole time they are in my care. If these questions are uncomfortable for you then please tell me and we will move on to the next until you are ready to tell me or until you find a subject you are willing to talk about." I was shocked. It was like Batman had entered the room and started dancing the Macarena. "Mr Joker?"

"When did you become a shrink?"

"Excuse me?"

"When did you start being a shrink?" Why is that question so hard for you to remember?

"Urm... actually... I started today" SAY WHAT!

"WHAT?!" I didn't expect that.

"I just graduated last month and started my internship under Dr. Arkham two days ago." She was blushing wildly.

"You started two days ago?" She nodded. "That day I saw you outside my cell, was that your first day?" She nodded again. "BASTARDS!" Anger filled my veins as I bang my fists on the table. How dare they! How dare they!

"Mr. Joker, what is wrong?" I have scared her again with my outburst. What is wrong with me? Why am I so upset that the fucker, Arkham, has thrown Harley into the lion's den without any experience? You have a plan Joker, stick to the plan!

"Oh Harley, one day you will understand. But for now let's talk about...you"

"Me?"

"Yes you" I smile to her sweetly, which she returned with a laugh. Only this laugh was new and strange as if she figured something out.

"You are a funny one Joker but I wasn't born yesterday," my smile fell quickly. "Let me guess you going to try to worm your way into getting every bit of information you can get from me and turn it against me." Oh smart but no, that's not it. I just look at her all smug. "Or," Wait, she isn't done yet! "you are going to try to play the victim. Guilt trip me into feeling sorry for you so that can manipulate me into doing things for you and make me help you escape." Wow! I just stare with wide eyes at her, I'm pretty sure my mouth is slightly agape too. How the hell did she know?

"Well it seems like you're not just a pretty face after all Harley. I misjudged you, I am sorry" Wait, I did just apologize? Why in all of Hell's glory did I do that for! The doctor just shrugged it off with a smile.

"Hey no worries, it's the hair" Harley joked and I actually laughed.

"Looks like I'm not the only Joker in here" we both laugh at our private joke when I see a glint in her eyes. You sure are not like the other docs shnookums. Before I know it, a bell rang to say our session was over, much to my disappointment. Gathering her items, Harley made her way over to the door when she turned back to me.

"See you soon Mr. Joker" and with that she left the room. I just glare at the door separating us as if it was The Batman himself. I always have a smile on my face but this smile was my biggest and it was all because of her. Because of my Harley Quinn.

Hey guys what did you think?

I thought I would mix Harley up a little bit to make her seem more difficult for The Joker.

Anyways if you don't like this take on Joker or Harley please tell me.

Or if you do please tell me as well.

CeCe

xx