Jeremiah and Conrad returned a few hours later. They weren't totally comftable, but it was fine. I sighed with relief when I saw them grinning at each other. Then Con gave Jere a slight push in my direction and I felt myself tighten. He hesitantly stepped forward and hugged me. We both loosened up and even started to laugh a little. When we broke apart, I took both of them at the hand and looked straight into their eyes, rotatory. It took a lot of courage to say what I was about to say, but it was the truth. Clean, straight forward truth.

„I really love you guys." I saw Con give Jere a unapproving look, but I ignored him. „And I'll be there for you no matter what. You're my brothers."

Jeremiah nodded, touched. „Family." He said.

And then we looked at Conrad, who looked petrified. For one small second I thought he would leave, but then his expression changed, and he returned my smile. I felt him squeeze my hand gently and saw him wink at his Jeremiah.

„We're alway have each other." he said.

We ate waffles and talked about old times. It was great. I didn't want to think about tomorrow, when we would have to leave Cousins. Or more specifically, when we'd return. At around six, Jere left to pick Taylor up. Con and me had some alone time. We snuck upstairs into his bed, and it felt so good to have him near me. The warmth and smell of his body made me dizzy.

I just stepped out of the shower, putting a shirt and shorts on, when I heard my best friends voice echoing through the house. I couldn't contain my grin as I hurried down the steps. And there she was, sprinting towards me, shrieking „Belly!," hugging me and pushing me away when noticing I was still wet. „You're disgusting!"

I pressed my lips on her cheek and she laughed. Jeremiah stepped forward and rested his arm around her hips, dragging her a little closer to him. I saw the surprised pleasure crossing Taylors face and felt the urge to tear them apart. But I didn't. I smiled as if I were happy for them and gestured to the sofas. „You guys want to sit down? Have a drink?"

„Orange juice please, babe." They sat down, and Con joined them. The boys took a bear and I poured myself a water. When we were all sitting, there was an awkward silence. So many things had we experienced together, but none of them popped up in my head. The water tasted stale.

„So... how are you guys? Hows marriage?"

„It's been really good." I said, glancing at my husband and thankful for the question. „There are things we still have to get used to, but it isn't hard to get adjusted."

Taylor nodded. „That sounds great, you guys. I'm happy for you."

„Thank you, Taylor." Conrad said sincerely.

She gave him a smile and turned to Jeremiah. „So, Jere. We haven't had that much time to chat yet. How have you been?" He just shrugged. Then he started tickling her. Taylor screamed and ran to the counter, where she was looking for cover. But he reached her just in time and grabbed her, amused. „You're so childish" My best friend was saying, but she was so out of breath from the exercise and the laughing that it was not very understandable. I stared at them both in amazement. When did this happen?

When they were both seated again, Taylor brushing her blond curls out of her face, I couldn't help but ask.

„What do you mean?" Jere asked in surprise, and I wasn't sure if he was fooling me or not.

„I mean... this." I looked at Conrad desperately.

Jere still acted like he didn't know what I meant, and just when I wanted to kick him for his stupidity, his phone rang and he rushed to the door. Conrad left for the bathroom and me and Taylor were alone.

„I don't get this." I blurted out.

She just smiled happily. „Me neither, hun. Ever since he called me and said we should meet up, he's been amazing. Really sweet. I think I might be falling for him."

I knew how much this took for Taylor to say that she really liked a guy, and the realisation hit me. Hard. „Thats..." I started, struggling for words. „Taylor, thats fantastic!"

I really did find it fantastic. It just bothered me that she had these feelings for Jeremiah.

„Now tell me," she said, lowering her voice. „How's it reallybeing married?"

„It's tough." I nearly choked on the words, but I licked my lips and continued. „People think about that moment- the one where the love of your life gives you the golden ring- ever since they've seen it in movies. They make plans. And it's amazing, really. Don't get me wrong. It's just-" I turned away, embarrassed of how I was feeling.

„Baby, I'm here, okay?"

„It's just that everyone says that once you're married, you're a grown up. Everyone has these expectations from you. I mean, I'm Isabellanow. I'm a wife. And I feel like I have pretty much always felt throughout my life- shy and innocent and crazy for Conrad."

„Why is that such a bad thing, though?"

She really tried to understand. She really did. But the things I felt, I could not describe. I was happy. I really was. But a few things were preventing me from having the perfect life I had dreamed of. And without warning, Jeremiahs face appeared in front of my eyes and I tried to shake him off- this was really throwing me off balance.

„Belly?"

„Yes?"

„How did Jeremiah treat you?"

I was a little shocked by the sudden urge in her voice. „What do you mean?"

„I mean what I said. How did he treat you when you guys were, you know, together."

I gasped. „Uhm, good. He was sweet. And loving. He took care of me and I felt safe. But you know that. I mean, you guys were together. Not a lot of guys are as caring as him." I looked at her, and she was chewing her nails. „But Tay, all of that is so long ago."

„Yeah, I know." She relaxed a little. But then she threw her hair over her shoulders and said, calmly, „Jere always loved you more."

These words made me cough, and I had to take a few long mouthfuls of water to stop the burning in my throat. I could hear myself breath- in, out. „That's not true." I said weakly.

„It is. I was a toy- a shiny, new toy he liked the looks of and he played with me. We had something, yes. But as quickly as it had started, it ended. Yourrelationship, on the other hand-" She sighed loudly, and twitched the blue ring she was wearing. „He really loved you, Belly. He would have done anything for you. You should have seen the way he looked at you, even when we were together." Her voice was soft, her words carried no anger, but she could have equally hit me. My stomach made a painful twist as I slipped deeper into the sofa. „You're just a gap I can't fill, Bells. He'll always love you one way or another. And I know you will, too. That's why I want to know if you're truly over him or not." I stared at her, processing everything she was saying. „Because If you were to chose him after all, he would not hesitate to leave me instantly." Taylor put the half empty glass of orange juice on the small table and watched it. Only now did it occur to me how much she had grown up. And then, for the first time throughout the conversation, she looked straight into my eyes and I knew that I had to make a decision.

„Are you over Jeremiah, Belly?"