101 Ways To Kill Jar Jar Binks 76
In this chapter, Jar Jar Binks will get eaten by zombies…of course given that it's Halloween you probably saw it coming…but anyways let's get this chapter started shall we?
Yes, I know, it's been only day since I posted my last chapter…but I haven't updated the story in nearly a month so who cares?
Now then, let's watch the zombies eat Jar Jar Binks's brains. I'm sure that it will be hilarious and that it will crack you up…or not.
Either way, let's start the chapter already.
Chapter 76: Zombies
After their encounter with evil space clowns, Qui-Gon Jinn once again decided to make our heroes visit the Jedi cemetery and honor the many Jedi that had all become one with the force. There were certainly a lot of Jedi who had died recently, including one who had died from having his eyes shoved down his pants so he could watch a Sith beat the crud out of him…and then had his tongue used to paint a boat and another one who had a sausage shoved down his throat and starving dogs stuck in his butt.
"Why does dis feel familiar?" wondered the Gungan, who felt like he had an unpleasant experience there before. Was it something about ghosts? He wasn't sure.
However, once they arrived at the cemetery…they noticed that it seemed rather different from when they last visited. It was as if evil was in the air…and they could even hear moaning. Something was not right.
"I've got a bad feeling about this place." warned Anakin Skywalker.
All around the cemetery were dead trees, some of which looked as if they were alive. It seemed even the wind was telling them not to go inside the cemetery. In fact, it was blowing in the opposite direction.
There was even a sign telling them "Do Not Enter" and that it was incredibly dangerous.
"I sense a disturbance in the force." Obi-Wan Kenobi also warned. Our heroes immediately started walking away.
But of course, Jar Jar Binks was stupid as usual and paid no attention, and walked straight into the cemetery. Unbuckling his trousers, he peed on one of the gravestones.
"Mesa feel so much better now!" he bellowed as he did his business. For some strange reason, he always needed to use the bathroom in the worst of times.
Suddenly, several zombies popped out of their gravestones and began advancing towards Jar Jar Binks. As with typical zombies, they were hungry for living flesh…and of course there was som right in their proximity.
Immediately, the starving zombies descended upon him, and they started to eat his miniscule brain along with his other vital organs, causing him excruciating pain.
"Help mesa! Mesa being eaten alive! Mesa not wanna become a zombie!" he screamed as the zombies tore at his flesh.
But it was too late, and the zombies ate him for dinner. He certainly was a delicious meal…but the zombies then turned their attention to our heroes, who started running away screaming like little girls.
"We should have brought guns!" screamed Padme Amidala. To make matters worse, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker, and Qui-Gon Jinn had all left their lightsabers in the space shuttle, meaning they had no way to defend themselves. Wasn't that such a good idea?
Thankfully, the zombies (as most zombies in fiction, naturally) were very slow, and our heroes were able to easily outrun them, just as they had outrun the many monsters they had encountered in the past. But the zombies were anything if not persistent, and they continued following them out of the cemetery.
"I calculate our chances of survival are minimal." stated C-3PO as our heroes ran away.
"Will you just shut up?" demanded Padme Amidala. She was tired of C-3PO annoying her.
R2-D2 beeped with fear from seeing the horrible zombies and soiled his robotic pants…leaving oil all over the floor.
Unfortunately, Qui-Gon Jinn wasn't paying attention to where he was going and slipped straight over it, and ended up having his brains eaten by the zombies as well.
"Noooo!" screeched Obi-Wan Kenobi as his master became one with the force. This was the second time he had died that particular day!
"We should have never gone here in the first place." thought Anakin Skywalker. He always hated cemeteries to begin with…and once this was over he would hate them even more. Suffice to say, he never wanted to visit a cemetery again.
Thankfully, the rest of our heroes were able to get in the space shuttle and fly away from the zombies. It was a good thing that the undead were unable to fly.
As usual, our heroes resurrected everyone that had died…which naturally included Jar Jar Binks so they could kill him in the next chapter.
However, they noticed that something seemed odd about it since they had last entered…had somebody gone inside while they were gone? Had it been sabotaged? They weren't exactly sure.
Our heroes decided to ignore this for the moment as they escaped from the zombies…with the exception of Jar Jar Binks, who noticed that there were strange eggs inside the ship.
"Oh boy! Mesa ganna have scrambled eggs for breakfast!" he squealed stupidly, having no idea what was inside of them.
As he left, one of them began to hatch…
To be continued…in the next chapter, obviously.
So, did you like this chapter? I figured that seeing though it was Halloween this chapter would be just perfect…I hope you all have fun trick-or-treating…
In the meantime…feel free to subscribe to me…I appreciate all the reviews and favorites I keep receiving…even if it starts to wear thin after a while…
Oh, and if you see a zombie…pull out a shotgun and blow its head off!
In the next chapter…I'll be referencing yet another movie…and Jar Jar Binks will once again die a horrible death…just as he always does! After all, it is a once per episode thing…and something to look forward too.