Disclaimer: D. Gray-man and Harry Potter and their characters do not belong to myself or Azhwi. They are the property of Hoshino Katsura-san and J. K. Rowling, and all associated thus.
By the same token, this story does not belong to anyone else, and as such, any elements not associated with Harry Potter or D. Gray-man are by proxy mine and my co-writer's to do with as we please. Do not take and reuse, redistribute or warp in any manner. Thank you.
The Depths We Will Go To
Part 1: Harry Potter Had it Easy
Chapter 2: Culture is Shocking
Fandom: D. Gray-man x Harry Potter
Characters: Kanda, Allen, Albus, Scorpius, James, mentions of others
Summary: Our exorcists settle in, butt heads with the natives, and just generally cause their own special brand of chaos. Oh joy.
Warning: Violence, language, shonen ai
Rating: T
Written by: Azhwi and Lost to the Hoping
Editing? What's that word mean?
xXx
Beyond the incident with the Sorting Hat, there were a few... other times of note, where the culture shock was particularly evident. For instance, the first round of classes, for seventh years, in Herbology. The class was re-evaluating ways to handle Fanged Geraniums. Of course, it wouldn't be a Hogwarts Class without a bit of chaos...
"Oh dear, oh dear," Professor Sprout tutted. She hurried over to the table where Kanda was being chomped on by one of the toothy plants, clucking her tongue worriedly. Beside the twitching Japanese boy, the resident Potter was trying not to lose a lung.
Kanda eyed the carnivorous flower for a few seconds, then pulled the entire thing out of its pot. Dirt fell in clumps from twisting white roots as the plant thrashed.
The laughing boy who had fallen to the floor had a split second to realize the danger he was in before Kanda shoved a terrified Geranium straight into his face.
As the teenager squawked and scrabbled at the roots that tried to take hold, Kanda turned a flat look at the teacher. "Be thankful I didn't put it down his throat."
"Detention," was the exasperated answer. The teacher then helped James up, and set to work replanting the flower.
xXx
Care of Magical Creatures turned out to be nearly as entertaining... for some. To the absolute delight of his fellow Slytherins and their Gryffindor classmates alike, Allen got a bit too relaxed around the odd little creatures Hagrid had brought for them to see.
Albus Potter howled with laughter as Allen - in the tight clutches of a very enraged Chaos Fairy (which had previously been an Earth Fairy... until Allen pissed it off) - dropped to the ground with a large enough thud that it startled several more fairies.
"Oof!" Opening his eyes, Allen blinked at the expression on the creature's face. Ah shit. Who knew it would understand English? "Ano... I'm sorry? I'm sure that you are actually very very smart!" Smart or not, you still got stuffed into a jar. Anyone would be pissed.
The small, glowing red fairy chittered furiously at him, flying into his face and pulling back a tiny fist. She never got the chance.
"No, don't-!" Hagrid started as another Slytherin jumped into action.
"Stupefy!" Malfoy shouted, watching dispassionately as the fay froze stiff and fell to the ground. "Professor Hagrid!" He spun, nose in the air and looking every bit the haughty Pureblood Prince he was. "Perhaps you should keep a better eye on the creatures you bring here! To have such a thing attack a student! You should be fired!"
Of course, not a one of the Gryffindor students were particularly fond of this assessment. The loudest supporter of the uncertain-looking groundskeeper being Potter, who got right up in Malfoy's face with a snarl.
At least the Chaos Fairy looked satisfied.
xXx
"I saw that, Kanda," a seventh year Slytherin announced after Potions Class on Friday. Technically, this class was a special extended class, since seventh years could only take it as an elective. But since Kanda hadn't been taught in any similar class before, he'd been slotted in among a handful of others. This particular class was mixed house, since there were so few in it, and partnered.
Kanda had been forced to join efforts with a Slytherin - Chance Motley - for the duration, and the tanned boy wasn't against blackmail. He'd seen what Kanda had done; he wouldn't need much to make it seem ten times worse.
The other teen stopped where he was, two feet from the door. They were the last ones in the room. "So?" Kanda asked, free hand reaching out and pushing the door closed.
Change smirked at him knowingly. "So... how upset d'you think the Headmistress would be if she heard you were cheating? She might expel you, you know," he drawled confidently. He knew he could hex the boy if he so much as twitched near him. He was the quickest wand-draw in class.
"Cheating?" Kanda sneered, throwing the lock on the door. "Fucking students. All they think about is school and rules and petty squabbles." He brought out his wand with a flick of his wrist to tap the door, then tossed it on a desk.
Chance frowned, watching the other boy discard his bloody wand. "... what are you doing?" he asked uneasily, but his confidence didn't wane much. The guy might have a scary sword... but surely he wouldn't be stupid enough to use it on another student.
… right?
In a way, Chance was correct. Kanda never did draw the katana. The Slytherin had one moment of doubt as the Japanese male dropped his book bag. Weren't Japanese muggles also known for hand to hand combat?
xXx
By the end of the first week, the exorcists hadn't found a single lead on the case. Not one, no indication of Innocence, no faint feeling of the stuff nearby. Nothing. The only developments in anything were the fact that Ameli Malfoy positively loathed Allen, her brother barely noticed him when he wasn't keeping the Slytherin image intact, and Kanda...
Well, he somehow managed to be extremely popular. Mainly among the younger children. Well, specifically a certain one...
"Ohhh, pleaaassseee? I just wanna see it! Just for a minute!" Adam pleaded, clutching Kanda's leg and refusing to budge, much to the older male's chagrin.
"No." Even as he said that though, Kanda's hands dropped to his hip. It wouldn't even take a second to knock the kid out with the dull side of the blade. It was doubtful that anyone would even see his motions. Adam was already laid flat out on the floor belly down.
"Aww, lay off it, Adam!" a familiar voice chirped, backed by the soft laughter of another person. Hugo appeared beside them and heaved the younger Weasley off the floor, despite his protests. "If he doesn't wanna show ya, he doesn't have to!"
"You don't even know what I'm talking about!" the younger redhead snapped, jerking away and nearly tripping. However, instead he just backed into Kanda, and whipped around. "Oh, please, please, pleassseeee, Kanda-sama?!"
Twitch. "You're not-" Kanda cut himself off. "No."
"'Sama'?" the voice belonging to the earlier laughter asked, as a boy about Kanda's age, James Potter, stepped in beside Hugo. "What does that mean?"
"It's an honorific!" Adam said with a self-important nod. "Like Mr. or Ms. Yanno, polite stuff! Misaki said!"
"Eh, the girl in Hufflepuff?" Hugo asked, brows furrowing. "So it means Mr?"
"Nooo, it's like lord!"
Kanda twitched again. "I am not-"
"Hold on, Kanda," James inserted, one hand up. He smiled as the exorcist scowled at the interruption. The oldest Potter boy turned back to Adam. "So, you're calling him a lord then? Meaning you respect him? Follow his wishes and all that?"
Adam narrowed his eyes at James suspiciously. The older boy was doing his 'I'm the son of Harry Potter' thing again. "Maybe," he said reluctantly, as Hugo stifled a grin.
"You do or you don't? I don't think the Japanese take respect halfway."
Kanda snorted, settling back on his heels. Oh there were various levels of respect, different degrees. Calling someone lord and master in a classroom setting among fellow students was ridiculous though. Kami help him if Walker heard of this.
Adam frowned at him, now more baffled than angry. "What's that gotta do with it?" he asked, now looking curious. "'Course I respect 'im. Cause he's cool!"
The pained look that crossed Kanda's face had the two older boys struggling to keep their own faces neutral.
"Well," James choked out, "if you respect him so much, you gotta respect his wishes. And he doesn't want to show you..." here he gestured at the scene: Kanda gripping his belt, Adam standing well within the Japanese man's personal bubble. "Whatever it is you're begging him to show you."
Now James was the one receiving a flat glare from Kanda. The insinuation was not lost on that one!
Adam crossed his arms, visibly thinking about it for a very long moment. Finally, he nodded. "Alright! I have homework anyway! But this doesn't mean you're any less cool!" he declared, and hurried off.
As soon as he was gone, Hugo burst into helpless laughter, leaning heavily against his taller cousin who was grinning widely.
Letting out a huff of irritation, Kanda nodded once to the other boys and stalked off towards his room, to which he had originally been heading before Adam had attached himself.
This whole place is insane. Shifting staircases, sentient paintings, spell casting, potions, flying brooms. Kanda wasn't sure if it assured him or alarmed him that he was decent at most of the wandwork. Allen found the whole experience entertaining. Maybe the Slytherin house has less... annoyances.
"Oh, Kanda!" a voice yelped when he walked into the dorm room. On the other side stood Albus and another dark haired boy, both hovering near what Kanda knew to be James' bed. The boys grinned sheepishly. "Fancy that! This isn't our dorm. No wonder things are so mixed up..."
Dark almond eyes narrowed. "What are you doing?" Kanda's hands were inching back towards his katana. James' bed was just next to his own afterall.
"Um, we just got lost, that's all," Albus said sheepishly. "Got turned around. I think someone put something into my drink."
"I told you," his cohort muttered. "You should watch what you drink, man."
"Maybe you should go see-" What was that woman's name? Oh. "Madame Pomfrey. Now."
"What a splendipidus idea," Albus agreed quickly, hurrying toward the door (though careful to keep just out of Kanda's reach). "Bye, Kanda! Have a beautificus day!"
"That's not even a word!" his cohort hissed, hurrying after him.
Unfortunately for the second boy, he didn't make it out of the room. Kanda's long arm snaked out and caught him by the back of his robe. "Potter drank it. You didn't."
The boy yelped, and Albus stopped in the doorway with a frown. "Hey, Kanda... Let 'im go," the slightly shorter male said.
The look Kanda gave him was flat, unimpressed, and irritated. "Not yet. Move." Half hauling the nameless boy out of the dorm, Kanda marched back into the common room. Various students, sprawled on and across the assorted pieces of furniture about the room, looked up in curiosity.
James and Hugo were sitting in armchairs, textbooks just being opened in their laps as Kanda loomed over them, prisoner in tow. Potter looked up just as the boy was shoved forward.
"He was messing with your bed. Deal with it," Kanda snapped out before turning on his heel and leaving for his room again.
Hugo blinked after him then looked at James, and Albus stepped into Kanda's path before he got three steps up. The Potter did not look happy. "That's pretty dirty, Kanda."
"Your excuse covered only you," Kanda replied. "Next time, cover for your partner as well."
Blue eyes narrowed at him, but Albus huffed and smiled at him. "Sure thing! Since that's actually some pretty good advice, I'll be fair about this. I don't like people that rat their comrades out, so watch your back." He stepped out of the way.
Kanda only rolled his eyes, pointing at the older Potter brother. "Dorm mate." Besides, James had just done him a favor, but Albus didn't need to know that.
Albus shrugged and walked off, going over to his brother. "Oy! James, it wasn't him. It was me," he said, grinning. "Payback for that ink thing!"
"Oh, you!" Rose huffed, stomping over to him. "Albus, were you playing pranks again!"
In the meantime, James was helping Charlie stand back up; Kanda could shove hard. "And the Grouch caught you," he observed, laughing. "I keep telling you, post a lookout."
His younger brother smirked. "True, true!" he said cheerfully. "I will next time."
"Uhg, how does anyone ever tolerate you delinquents?" Rose growled. "I have half a mind to take points!"
Albus stuck his tongue out at her. "Meany book head!"
"Why you!"
And unseen, a miniature redhead snuck upstairs after Kanda.
Homework, Kanda seethed, staring at textbooks and papers and a wand. He couldn't do what he was sent to do because he had to do fucking homework. Walker and he had determined early on that because the dorms didn't have a lock, it would be idiotic to do their meetings and note comparisons here or at the Slytherin rooms.
The two times Walker had brought him into that house, both exorcists were amused by the amount of comments they received. Some were even creative.
There was a sudden, timid knock on the door, almost hesitant. "... Kanda?"
The Japanese man growled. "No." It seemed the only thing he was saying to Adam these days. That and: "Go away."
Silence followed, and then sadly retreating footsteps.
For a brief moment, Kanda was tempted to open the door and yell at the boy. If anything to avoid the absurdity of doing homework on a Tuesday night. However, he was never one to shirk his duties. The sooner night falls, the better. I need to break something.
xXx
Braced by both feet and an elbow, Kanda waited for the pair of prefects below him to continue walking. A few slow breaths later and they had turned the corner, taking their wand lights with them. The Japanese man let out a silent snort-security was abysmal-and dropped to the floor ten feet below. For a world that had flying abilities, the guards should look up on a regular basis.
Padding along the cool tiles, the dark clothed exorcist slipped up a hall and carefully ducked through an unassuming door.
The Room of Requirement was a strange thing. It had enough space for sparring. Mats stacked along the walls. Padded weapons, a fresh water supply, and interestingly enough, rolls of bandages and smooth sticks for splints. Those last two weren't there in the first week. But then Kanda cracked a bone in his lower leg. The room could apparently learn. Again, Kanda wasn't sure how to feel about that.
As the door closed behind him, a golden ball of wings and metal fluttered over to him in greeting.
"Moyashi here yet?" Kanda grunted, looking around. Sometimes they ambushed each other. It kept their senses alert.
In answer, a blur flickered toward him from above, and Allen cursed as Kanda dodged. "Almost!"
Kanda snorted. "Maybe in ten years," he said, happily drawing Mugen.
Allen smirked and slid into a fighting stance. "So I think I found something," he said, and darted forward, using his arm to bat away the incoming blade and going in to punch Kanda in the stomach.
"Finally." His free hand snapped out, tapping the incoming punch aside and he spun with Walker, neither leaving an open flank facing the other. Kanda brought the hilt back towards an unprotected temple, but switched tactics and instead brought up a knee to block a front snap kick. "So?"
The two of them jumped apart and circled carefully. "Well, there's this one kid in fifth year. Keeps to himself mostly, but he goes missing a lot. No one seems to know where to, except his sister, and she won't even look at me, much less talk."
He shrugged, twisting around as Kanda darted in, and grabbing the older boy to throw him. Kanda rolled into the movement and dragged Allen through it, ending with Allen pinned beneath Mugen's blade. He grinned sheepishly.
"Anyway, I know it's not much," he muttered, barely winded. "But it's more than we've gone on for the last month or so."
Nodding sharply, Kanda shifted up off Walker, Mugen held at ready. "His name?"
"Scorpius Malfoy," Allen replied, rolling to his feet. He snatched up a practice katana from the rack off to the side, and got back in a stance. "If you're going to look into him yourself, watch out for his sister. She's a real gem," he said sarcastically. "Follows him pretty much everywhere, unless he pulls one of his disappearing acts. Oh, right!"
The grey-haired youth flashed forward, swinging his hand toward Kanda's head as the other moved to block the blade. There was a moment's pause in speech as Kanda changed the direction of his swing, forcing Allen to risk getting cut or move back.
He chose the latter and they circled again, while Allen continued. "He's good at that. Disappearing, I mean. I tried tailing him once, but he plain vanished. Went around a corner, and when I got there he was gone. Three seconds."
The other exorcist scowled. "Magic." It seemed reasonable. They were in a school for it after all.
He rolled under the wide slash of Walker's blade, rising up inside his opponent's reach. His free palm punched out for Allen's solar plexus while Mugen was braced along his spine, clanging against the return of the larger sword.
"Have you been approached for Quidditch tryouts?" Kanda asked abruptly as they sprang apart. James had been pestering him lately about the game. Something about being a beater.
"Ah, yeah... Actually, a couple of my classmates wanted to know if I'd be interested. But I turned them down. I don't know how to use a broom, and frankly, I'd be useless." Allen frowned faintly. "That reminds me... I've been asked about you."
Well there went that idea. Scorpius was following in his father's footsteps and was entering into tryouts. Both James and Hugo had made sure to stress that. If Walker could find a position on the team, he would have another reason to tail Malfoy.
Wait. "What for?"
"No idea. Some girl from Hufflepuff was curious." He grinned. "I think she has a crush. Doesn't make sense, since you're such a girl."
Growling, Kanda lifted Mugen. "She can keep her attentions. Or do you want me to direct them to you? Since you're such a moyashi that you're not noticeable?"
"I'm socially off-limits, didn't you know?" Allen said, grinning and lifting his own practice katana. "Feminine face!" He darted forward.
"Die Moyashi!"
xXx
It's a bit shorter than the last chapter, but that's because the next scene's a bit long.
I'd like to note that most of the stuff we wrote in this chapter was completely off the top of our heads, and we prefer it that way. Not that we didn't correct things with research after the fact... but just fair warning to detail nazis...
Anyway... thank you, those of you who reviewed! I'm not used to existing! (When it comes to Az and my stories, that is...)
Review, please! And thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed~