Chapter Eighteen: Ancient History Relived
Harry was having nightmares since his visit to the subconscious. And would dream of his time at the Dursley's and the abuse he suffered at their times he'd dream that he and Ginny had died and Teddy was stuck living the same hated life that he had suffered.
"HARRY!" Ginny said seeing her fiancé trashing around the bed and sweating.
"Ginny…what's wrong?" Harry asked as he eyes popped open. He looked like a ghost, all pale with wide eyes.
"You're still having nightmares." She said it as if it was a statement and not a question. "The agreement was that you'd tell me about them." Ginny sat up and hugged him trying to calm him down.
Harry took a deep breath then said, "Okay, I'll tell you. Every time I have a nightmare it's one of the same. I'm either reliving my time at the Dursley's or I'm dreaming that we have died and Teddy was forced with the same loveless childhood I had." When Harry was done talking he looked like he was the same eleven year old boy she first saw on platform 9¾ all those years ago.
"Love…please just please tell me what it was like," Ginny said looking worried about Harry's wellbeing.
"Please don't ask that of me Ginny…I just don't want to relive it," Harry said his eyes fighting back the tears.
"Harry…I think you either talk to me or to your parents about what happened during your childhood." Ginny said looking straight at him.
"I'll tell you but only if you agree not to tell my parents. They'd just feel responsible about it. That's why when I got that Pensieve I kept those memories out of it," Harry said to her. He looked battle worn from his trying to battle his nightmares alone.
"Okay deal. But let's go to the kitchen or library," Ginny said getting out of bed.
"Library," Harry said without a second thought. When Ginny gave him a quizzical look he said, "I love that room." Ginny shrugged her shoulders and they walked together to the library. "Okay Gin, what do you want to know?" Harry asked when they had shut the door behind them.
"What was your first memory of that house?" she asked sitting on an old armchair.
"I was two…Dudley had decided to punch me around. He broke my nose and a finger I think…all I remember was my tears healing them…I think it was my first piece of magic," he said ducking his head as if he was trying to hide his tears.
"What was your worst memory growing up there?" Ginny asked holding his hand trying to sound as sympathetic to Harry as possible to hide her anger, which was currently growing near the point of overflowing.
"It was my fourth birthday. I never had a cake until Hagrid came for me when I was eleven but that year I saw this lovely chocolate cake on the counter and my hopes were so high so we ate dinner then Petunia mentioned the cake…it was for Dudley because he learned to play football, she then told me to go to bed and I did…back under that fucking cupboard like every other day," Harry said now visibly crying into Ginny's top.
"Harry…my last question is this, how did you manage to love anyone with that kind of hatred being all you received when you were young?" Ginny asked stroking his hair and rocking him softly.
"I met people who were like me. They weren't as hated as me, I mean Ron had all of you and Hermione had her parents. Hell even Neville had his granny, me, I had three people who referred to me as 'freak' at all times. Then I met Hagrid and he showed me the world I truly belonged to. He was also the first person who showed me love. Then Ron and Hermione showed me friendship…I never had friends the kids at the Muggle School were too afraid of Dudley to befriend me so when I found friends I cherished them. And then later when I met Sirius, I finally had a family member that loved me and when I lost him for those years I felt empty. But when I started having feelings for you, I knew it was true love. But I tried to dismiss it as a brotherly love but now if I didn't have you, Teddy, Ron and Hermione I don't know if I would still be alive." Harry said holding Ginny close to him.
"You really are an amazing wizard Harry, but not because of your spell work or defeating Riddle, but because you found what he didn't. You found love Harry and that in its self is truly amazing." Ginny said taking his hand and guiding him back to bed. They lay down together. Harry still had his arms wrapped around her and his face was still wet from the many tears that he had shed that night.
Harry pretended to be asleep and waited for Ginny to dose off. After he heard her snoring gently he went downstairs to his study, the smaller of the libraries, which had more Potter family diaries and heirlooms than the bigger library.
"When did I grow up?" Harry asked himself,looking at the picture of him, Ron and Hermione from their first year and then a picture of him, Ginny and Teddy taken after the adoption.
"The day you were forced to fight Riddle in the graveyard I think my son," James said entering the study.
"How did you get here dad?" Harry asked looking around confused.
"Ginny secretly contacted us telling us you're having nightmares. She wouldn't tell what about though," Lily said entering and sitting beside her son.
"Smart girl that Ginny," James said putting an arm around his son's shoulder and holding him close. "Is this regarding your past Harry?"
"Just old scars I don't want to remember," Harry said looking at his father.
"Like living with Tuni and Vernon," Lily said putting Harry's head on her lap.
"Yes," Harry said looking into his mother's green eyes a true reflection of his.
"Harry…let us see the life you lived…please…it would not upset us I swear that to you," James said rubbing his sons head.
"Okay…but you can't say I didn't warn you…you won't like what you see," Harry told them extracting a full Butterbeer bottle worth of memories and handing them to his parents.
"We probably won't Harry, but at least we will know. I can't promise we won't be angry at the Dursley's but we deserve to know," James said hugging Harry and leaving the room to retrieve his father's Pensieve from the attic. "My father designed this Pensieve to allow whole life's of a person be it is just you're years in the Dursley's it should work."
Harry watched as years of neglect and hatred were now visible. He was watching himself be hated for being a wizard and of his worse days being shown for what they were, it took the entire night but by the end of it Harry, James and Lily had watched the nightmare of sixteen years eleven months three weeks six days of Harry's life in number four Privet Drive.
"Why did you forgive them my son?" Lily asked looking horrified at the thought of all she had witnessed.
"I knew Petunia was sorry, she broke down crying because she missed you so much," Harry said looking at his parents' faces wishing he had never given the memories.
"Harry…you suffered more hatred in those years than humanly possible and frankly I don't understand it. I mean I know that your ability to love is strong but…they were nothing short of prison guards with you," James said looking at his son,his eyes full of respect and love.
Harry looked between his parents and said, "I accepted the fact that the Dursley's were cruel for years but I have to say if not for what I have now, I don't think I'd have lived that night in May." Harry pulled out a letter he had been given the week following the battle from Kingsley and showed it to them.
Dear Harry and Ginny,
Andromeda has explained the situation and I feel we need some discretion.
I have told the committee that Teddy is your biological child.
Arthur and I are working on a cover story as we speak and are hopeful it will work.
Harry having known you and your parents I can honestly say they would be proud.
Ginny I have always respected your family but now I must say I respect you the most.
I will be in touch soon,
Kingsley Shacklebolt.
Minister for Magic
"You mean to tell us that you adopted Teddy out of guilt Harr?" James asked him.
"No. Not out of guilt but out of friendship and guilt was a factor, but only an extremely small one," Harry said. He looked over to the picture of Teddy on the desk and smiled.
"Why did you live there Harr…I know you needed protection but really I mean if you had just had Sirius or Remus or even Pete…I mean-" James cut himself off realizing what he was going to say.
Harry looked at his father then told him, "Wormtail was killed because he helped me…he owed me a life-debt and it cost him his life that's why I commissioned a headstone for him in the graveyard."
"-it's nice to know Wormtail tried to repay you my son," James said finishing his cut off sentence.
"We need to finish the wedding plans I think." Harry said trying to shift the topic to something elsewhere beside the lost man.
"You're not changing the subject darling…like father like son." Lily said laughing at the two men.
"Well it was worth a shot. But I'm serious about what I said mom…if I didn't have my friends and my family I would have when Kingsley said he could bring you both back I was worried it was a trick then punched him, but then I knew I had to ask the two of you before I did anything. I also wanted Remus and Dora to come back but they were happy with their choice of life for Teddy," Harry explained looking between his parents and thinking of how much he loved them.
"We're glad you found love Harr and we love Ginny and to mention Hermione and Ron and all of those who have helped you." James said hugging Harry and leaving in a Disapparation quiet as a mouse.
"We'll be up a while love and relax," Lily said kissing Harry on the cheek and following her husband's Disapparation.
A/N: This was my current favourite chapter to write as it is a true emotional one. Review and remember name the baby.