I wiped my tears and dropped my head into my hands in the waiting area seat in the E.R. My mom was on her way and Demi's parents, Selena, and that Terrance guy had already arrived. I don't even know why he was here or who even told him. He didn't deserve Demi, but neither did I.
Demi had flat-lined two times already and miraculously came back to life, but everyone was loosing hope fast. The doctor said they were trying to get her stomach pumped and her body was trying to fight back but the pills were fighting back harder causing her to flat line and then come back unexpectedly.
I ran my fingers through my hair and stared at the clock in the waiting room. We'd been here for two hours already.
Selena sat down next to me and placed her hand on my back. "It's going to be-" She started.
I rolled my shoulders. "Don't touch me." I hissed.
Selena removed her hand as I stood up and walked over to the wall. I leaned up against it under the clock as the sound of the elevator door opening caught my attention. I looked up at Miley in her bare feet holding her flashy stilettos with tears rolling down her face.
She stepped out of the moving room and her face turned to confusion. "It's all your fault!" She yelled pushing Terrence against the wall. Selena ran over to Terrence and I followed. "You should be ashamed of yourself."
"Hey! Leave him alone!" Selena exclaimed cutting in between Terrence and Miley.
"You both have no right to be here!" She shouted. "You both are probably what pushed her over the edge anyway! She had a world of chances for all of you!" She paused. "I hope you both burn in hell, even you, Justin."
"Hey," Demi's dad, I'm guessing, exclaimed walking towards the commotion. "Do we really need to be fighting during something like this?" He asked.
"No, sir." Selena answered.
"The De La Garza's?" Demi's doctor's voice caught all of our attention as he walked down the hall. His face filled with sorrow and I already knew what he was going to say. "We finished the stomach pumping plus a charcoal wash but it was too late. I'm sorry."
Miley fell down on her knees sobbing into her hands. It was like the other half of her had been sucked out of her body.
Selena ran towards the room where Demi was and Terrance leaned against the wall expressionless.
Demi's parents and her sister held on to each other tightly with rivers forming on their faces.
And me, my heart stopped. My heart stopped, but it was still beating. My body was dead, dead, but alive. Tears streamed down my face. I didn't believe any of this. I ran into the room where Demi was or where her lifeless body was.
Selena was holding onto Demi's hand and crying into her own arm. Just as I wiped the tears from my eyes, a loud beating sound filled the room. Selena popped her head up as I looked at the cardiac monitor screen. Trenches were forming after mountains. I peeked my head out of the doorway and screamed for the doctor. Everyone came running to the room.
The doctor pulled out a flashlight from his coat and waved the light into Demi's eyes as some of the nurses pushed us out of room, but Selena stayed, refusing to move.
I fluttered my eyes open a little bit hoping to be standing outside the gates of heaven, but that dream was long gone, once I stared into the eyes of a mixed, bald headed doctor.
He let out a deep breath. "She's alive!" He shouted shoving the flashlight into his coat pocket. He said something else after that but his words were fading in and out and on top of that I wasn't listening either. Instead, I was focused on the other people around me.
I looked down at my right hand which was being held by Selena as she stared at me with a huge smile on her face. I took another look around the room. My parents were holding hands with Madison in front of them and they all had a sign of relief on their faces. Next to them was Miley. She was holding her shoes and hugging Justin with a giant smile on her face.
My gaze moved onto the only one I didn't want here. Terrance. He was expressionless. He wasn't happy. He wasn't sad.
Besides him, everyone seemed so happy. They all got what they wanted, but I didn't. I didn't want to be here. I didn't want to deal with the struggle of trying to be accepted by society. I didn't want to deal with the struggle of Taylor and her wrath. I was given a second chance, but I didn't want it. I refused to take it.
I sat up on the hospital bed disappointed. I felt horrible. It was like my entire insides were washed out with bleach.
"Whoa. Not so fast there." The doctor said. I looked up at his name tag that said: "Dr. L. Hartnell". "I want to keep you over night for observation and we'll see how you go from there, but right now I'm going to have someone come in and ask you a few questions. Okay?"
I nodded my head.
He left the room after having a brief conversation with my friends and family and they all followed him out of the room like a mama duck and her ducklings.
A tall lady with a briefcase and a clipboard came in after and sat on a gray tess chair beside the hospital bed that I sat upon. She looked something like a giraffe with her long neck and freckles as spots.
"Hi, Demi. I'm Dr. Waldner." She said sticking out her hand. I shook it, before she pulled out a pen from behind her ear. She was so formal and kind of boring if you asked me. Her thin lifeless hair was turning gray and her lips were dry.
"I'm just going to ask you a few questions," she continued. "if that's alright with you."
I shook my head. "It's fine." I mumbled but loud enough to hear.
This was all so new to me. I had never done anything this "extreme" that actually landed me n the hospital.
"What drove you to such a drastic decision?" She read from her clipboard.
"Myself." I said looking down at the cuts on my arm.
She danced her pen across the paper and opened her mouth again. "What do you mean by that? Were you bullied? Were you abused?"
"It's not even their fault. It's mine," I said looking up at her. "I mean, they only say that stuff because it's true. They're not going to sugar coat it."
She nodded her head and looked back down at her paper. She asked, "Do you believe there is a God?"
I shook my head. "Yeah,"
"Do you think what you were trying to do was pleasing to God?" She asked.
I shrugged. "I don't know. I never really thought about it."
She wrote something else down on her piece of paper and stood up.
"That's all for now, Demi. Nice meeting you." She said grabbing her briefcase. She didn't even bother looking at me before she left the room.
"Depending what the therapist in there says," Dr. Hartnell said with all of us gathered around him outside of Demi's room. "will determine on how we should proceed with this."
The therapist walked out of the room, pushing her pen behind her ear and slipping her clipboard below her armpit.
"I want her to see a psychoanalyst," She said looking at Demi's parents. "and I'd keep her out of school until we can really find the root of the problem. Until then, I would keep eyes on her twenty-four seven because, now, she's even more likely to try to commit suicide again." She pulled out her clipboard and her pen and began jotting something down. "Here's the address, name and phone number of my recommended psychoanalyst." She handed Demi's mom the piece of paper after she ripped it off of an unidentified paper.
Demi's dad shook her hand before she left with her long skirt swaying back and forth as she walked away.
"You guys are welcome to see her now, but just be careful what you say to her. Don't overwhelm her." Dr. Hartnell suggested.
Miley, Selena and Terrence headed into the room. Demi's mother called my name, before I could even take a step into Demi's room.
"We were wondering, since Demi has to stay home and we have to work, maybe if you could just keep an eye on her for a couple of days?" Demi's mother asked. "We'll get you the school work you need, we just really need eyes on Demi at the moment."
Without hesitation, I agreed. I was willing to do anything Demi needed to help her recover, especially if I didn't have to go to school. Demi was my top priority right now. I had to make sure that she was okay and that she'd be okay.