Chapter 13: Insecurities

Maybe I babied Atsushi too much. Maybe I should learn to let him live while I did some living on my own. But then again, what type of friend would I be? I refused to leave his side. Whether it would be now or by the end of our high school year. I wouldn't follow Atsushi to wherever he may plan to go, but I'd surely accompany him on the journey via calls and messages. We were brother and sister, after all. Family was something that you could never take for granted.

And right now, I was busting my chops to save my only sibling from a dangerous sugar intake.

Pumping my small, thin legs even more I run wildly through the cold, night breeze as I try to keep my dress from riding up. And quite frankly, running in one was nothing but easy. My dress was riding up, the top half was dropping downwards into a dangerous, exposed deep v and my hair was all over the place. I was positive the small headband had fallen out, but that was the least of my concerns. Until I remembered Sakurai's sister had made and, would probably like one of her work of arts back for future wear for other people. So I had to take an extra couple of minutes and retrace my steps, searching for the vibrant, tiger printed headband in the nearby streets. Finding it in one piece, I began to book it once again towards home.

Taking a sharp left, I've finally arrived on my street. And thankfully my house was the third one over. Possibly enough, I had somehow managed to run even faster as I saw Atsushi's tall, intimidating shadow walk throughout the kitchen.

Bursting through the front entrance, I kick off my shoes within a blur as one of them goes flying off, knocking over one of my mom's expensive art pieces she had brought from America.

Ignoring the damage for now, I hop expertly over the few glass shards as I fall to my knees in the kitchen. Panting breathlessly I stare deeply at the wooden floor, contemplating whether or not to fall asleep right now.

"Eh? Tor-"

Snapping my head upwards, I drag my body eerily across the floor towards my dad who sits on the chair, as he places his book down bewildered to give me a much heated look.

"What are you wearing?!" he asks solemnly, as his grey eyes narrow judgingly at me as he eyes my very exposed attire.

Brushing the matter off, I begin to shake his pant leg as I ask him where Atsushi was.

"Hm? I think he's with your mother in the-"

Dragging my body back to where I had come from, a shadowy figure suddenly overcomes me as I feel an intimidating presence stand before me. Judging by the pair of slippers, it wasn't Atsushi.

"Young lady, what exactly have you done to my vase?! More importantly, what exactly are you wearing?!" yells my mom in horror, as she grabs me by the arm pulling me upwards.

"A-Atsu-"

"Yes, yes, he's right behind me. Tora, what-"

Suddenly Atsushi appears behind my mom with a clear, sad look on his face as he stares at me deathly with his hands dug snug in his pockets.

Confused, I ignore my mother's lecturing as I begin to examine Atsushi's body to make sure he wasn't hiding anything. Checking under his arms, through his hair and even lifting up his shirt, I found no sweets. Nothing. Don't tell me he already ate everything!

"M-Ma! Did Atsushi eat all the-"

Rolling her eyes at me, she ignores my question as she walks towards the pantry. She rummages around for a few seconds before she pulls out a now, metal box with a rigid lock attached to the front. On the top had Atsushi's name on it, a skull face printed right beside it. Behind me I felt Atsushi's temper flaring slightly.

"B-But I-"

"Tora, there are two grown-ups living in this house as well. We worry just as much about Atsu-kun as you do. But I am glad you've returned home. Now, go upstairs and change!" she orders sternly, as for effect she crosses her arms over chest. She was trying to act as the traditional and angry mom, but she just didn't have it in her. None of my parents did. Which made me ask myself as to where I got my temper from.

Slouching my head down in disappointment, I turn around dejected as I brush past Atsushi.

"Neh, Tora-chin. I know you have a flat chest and all, but it doesn't mean you should let the twins out for-"

Glancing down at my chest gloomily, I suddenly notice that I had forgotten to pull up my little outfit. Growing terribly red, I nearly yank it up to my chin but then I realize that it wouldn't make up for the much needed extra clothing at the bottom. Scowling angrily, I punch Atsushi as hard as I could into his arm as I ran upstairs towards my room.

Here I was, worried out of my mind all for nothing. Who knows how money people I possibly flashed?!

Turning on the bath, I pull out my phone to quickly text Taiga and let him know that I was fine and that I was sorry about running off. Some things just needed an extra eye upon. Clearly I had been wrong.

As I'm about to put my phone to the side and take a much needed bath to wash away all the grime, sweat and guilt, I notice that I had just received a picture message. Opening it up without much thought, I suddenly find myself playing catch with my phone as my fingers had magically turned into butter. Finding a hold on it and holding it with two hands carefully, I stare at it almost unwillingly as my face begins to grow hot at the sight.

It was a message from Aomine.

You know the saying, "A picture says a thousand words"?

Well this was a novel in the works.

There were many things going on. First, it wasn't just one picture. As I opened up the first, a second one had just been received. And then after I opened that, another one was sent as well. It was sort of like a flipbook. A flipbook of Aomine stripping.

Or that's what I was led to believe.

The first picture was of him in his Touou basketball uniform, fully dressed. The second, his shirt had mysteriously disappeared. The third, his…pants, had as well, mysteriously disappeared. After the third came a final fourth. Clearly dreading opening this one, I almost had to out of curiosity. Bracing myself for something large and…foreign in my eyes, I begin to laugh as it turned out to be a picture of Momoi smiling at the camera, as it looks like she had just thrown a pillow and Aomine's clothes back at him in the background. He sits on the ground with an open mouth from, what I assumed, yelling at the poor girl.

Continuing to laugh at the last picture, I contemplate on what to send him back. Something that would just as equally send him over the edge. Just like he had almost done with me. Eyeing Aomine-chan that sat on my bed, I grabbed its fluffy arm and dragged it with me to the bathroom.

Stripping and climbing into the warm, bubbly bath, I hold Aomine-chan behind my neck as a cushion, trying not to get it wet. Snapping a picture, and this time making sure nothing was out of place, I send him the picture before I go to bed, not wanting Momoi to be there if and when he opened it, with the caption, "This could be you."

With that, I saved the draft text message on my phone and set my phone down, revelling in the peace and quiet that I hadn't received in awhile.

XxXxXxX

"Get your ugly face out of my way!" I growl out irritably, as I try to desperately dribble pass my very persistent vice-captain.

Today was Monday. The weather was terribly gloomy, depressing and rainfall was to be expected. Instead of waiting for Atsushi this morning by our usual spot by the convenience store, where Atsushi would pick up a few snacks, I had decided to leave him alone to walk. I needed some time to cool off. I was still mad at him from yesterday. Even though he hadn't ended up eating all the food, I just knew that if my parents hadn't been there he would've gladly had helped himself.

Not only that, but because of his actions I was grounded for a month because I broke my mom's vase which had apparently cost her nearly $200. Which then I went on to argue as to why she would purchase something so ugly looking for such a high cost.

"Well I gave birth to you, right? Look how much money that's been costing me!"

After being defeated by the insults of insults, I caved into my mother and had promised to reimburse her for the lost $200 from my future salaries. From now on, I'd basically be working for free, with none of my earnings going into my pocket.

And that was what annoyed me. The fact that Atsushi had no restraint. No will power.

Now here I was. In the middle of practice and Atsushi hadn't even considered showing up. Almost always we were partners for any warm-up activity at the beginning of our practices. Since he was a no show, I had to partner up with the vice-captain, the second shortest of the team, Fukui.

It's not that I hated Fukui, to say. It's just that he got under my skin quite a bit, although unknowingly. He was one of those types that expressed themselves through humour. Although funny and lovable at one point, he could turn annoying and plain abusive during the other half. Well, mainly towards me considering we loved to pick on each other due to our small height.

But right now, Atsushi not showing made me slightly, well greatly rattled up. The nerve! I knew he didn't care for basketball and found it boring but he always showed up for practice because in his words, I was there to keep him entertained. Something I hadn't been sure of to take as a compliment but I had figured out what he had meant.

I liked being that outlet of escape for him. I liked holding that special place in his heart. And the fact that he could care less about his little escape of reality made something inside of me singe up and down in the back of my esophagus.

"Someone's a little angry," mutters a sweating Fukui, as he pushes his blonde locks back while also defending me from making a basket.

Dribbling the large ball back and forth from left and right between my small hands, I take a quick, hard step to the left to which Fukui quickly counters. Losing control of the ball, Fukui grabs it and immediately runs past me as he goes in for a basket.

Still angry, I decide to follow him; the idea of him winning the one on one would most likely be the icing on top of my terrible attitude today.

Pumping my legs like an engine, I end up beside him as I jump onto his body, clinging onto his arm where the ball drops from his grasp, rolling to the side. Taking Fukui and I both down to the floor, I end up on his chest as the both of us begin to breathe raggedly in sharp, stressed intervals.

"The hell was that?!" he asks in slight amusement and shock as he refers back to my sudden attack on his large, tan arm.

"You were pissing me-"

"We were playing-"

"You're ugly."

Slamming his head onto the gym floor, Fukui rubs the sweat from his face with both hands as he groans irritably into his palms. Rolling off of his chest, I lay on my back sprawled out beside him as I stare up at the large, open ceiling.

"Fukui?"

Mumbling into his palms he asks me what was wrong.

"Do you think I worry too much about Atsushi?"

"Someone has to. He's a kid. He needs someone like you-"

"But eventually I'm not going to be-"

"Like I said. He's a kid. Kids grow and learn. By the time you and he are done school he'll have grown. Trust me."

Sighing at his words, I turn on my side as I causally pinch his nostrils together, cutting off his breathing. As he begins to control his breathing with his mouth, he asks me in a nasally voice if I had anything else on my mind.

"For a stupid looking vice-captain, you can give some great advice," I joke lovingly, as I give him a small, airy smile in return for his helpful words.

"For a little mouse, it sure looks like you like your cheese," he jokes in response, as I watch in horror as reaches down towards my lower abdomen, bunching up my skin to make it look like I had a bunch of flab.

Men. How come none knew how to handle a woman properly?

Pinching his nostrils tightly and clamping my hand dangerously over his mouth, I watch with a look of amusement as he begins to struggle for air. Enjoying the tormented look on his face, I'm suddenly pulled up by the back of my shirt into the air. In an all four position suspended from the ground, I cross my arms over my chest as I begin to pout and look the other way.

"Tora. Please tell me you weren't trying to kill-"

"Tora didn't do anything wrong!" I say innocently in third person, as I look upwards towards the large, intimidating fellow. But underneath his rough exterior, my captain, Okamura, was nothing less of a sweet, kind man.

It was a shame that he couldn't find a girlfriend. She'd be very lucky to have someone like him to wake up to.

Sighing in exasperation the large man sets me delicately back onto the floor as he kneels down towards a wheezing Fukui.

"What'd you say this time?"

"I called…her a little mouse…and called…her fat," pants Fukui, as he and Okamura begin to laugh at the lame joke.

Although Okamura was a gentleman, he was still a boy at heart. A cruel, immature boy that is.

Searching around for something to throw at the two to stop their obnoxious laughing, I decided to take off my shoe, chucking it at them. Fortunately for them they both dodge from my terrible aim and instead, the three of us watch it hit our tall, 203 cm player, Liu.

As it nails him in the lower abdomen because of his height, he stares at us blankly as he suddenly begins to yawn.

Picking up the shoe as if it were a foreign animal, he tosses it towards me where he nails me in the forehead unexpectedly.

"Wow! You got her good," muses out Okamura, as I hear him walking towards me to make sure that I hadn't died from anger from the sudden blow.

"Liu's our mouse trap to Tor-"

"Thee should have been looking, Tora," states Liu apathetically, as I watch, from the help of Okamura, Fukui standing up with Liu's help. Those two together. They were the worst.

With Fukui's snarky attitude and Liu's unknowingly cold, dead-pan insults, it was not a good time. Especially for me.

As to what Fukui had thought of as a brilliant prank, he had convinced Liu into talking in an old-fashioned way, stating that it was the new thing. Gullible, Liu had fallen for the mishap and has ever since spoken that way.

Lunging viciously towards the two idiots before me, Okamura holds me back. Ultimately resulting in me being thrown out of the gym, ordering to be cooled down before coming back in.

After 10 minutes in the cold, frosty morning air, I had realized that I was not going to cool down. So I decided to kill time by spamming Fukui and Liu's phone's with pointless messages and pictures.

To Liu's phone I had walked around the school, quickly gathering snaps of everyone's shoes to then I which sent to him captioning, "Hit me again and these will all be coming your way."

As for Fukui, I took a picture of a rock and sent it to him, captioned, "Even this rock has more value than you…ugly."

Content with my juvenile ways, I had then walked back into the gym much happier.

The captain did say to cool off after all. He never specified as to how.

XxXxXxX

Grumbling in annoyance as I walked up the gruelling flight of stairs up to the roof, I knew for sure that Atsushi had to be up there. I wasn't sure what he had meant when he told me this, but he told me that he could get a better feel for things up from the school.

Something I didn't understand because let's face it, couldn't he already see much before him already?

After skipping practice and from what I heard math as well, I needed to find Atsushi and figure as to why he was suddenly misbehaving. Generally speaking, Atsushi was a good student. Although he didn't look like the type, he enjoyed learning now and then.

And today it seemed odd for him to skip both classes before lunch.

Nearly kicking the door open with my foot, I tiredly walk into the cool, open air as I find his tall figure sprawled out across the furnace. His hands lay crossed behind his head as he overlaps his legs together.

And of course, he had a lollipop in his mouth as he stares up at the sky, peaking at my figure from the corner of his wide, tired eyes.

Upon walking closer to his lounged form, I notice that he has his hair tied back. Something he rarely did.

"What's with the hair?" I ask casually, as I move his legs to the side to take a seat. Due to my short height, I had to jump up to sit on the white furnace and for some reason, probably because of the morning's practice; I couldn't quite get on top. Struggling, by now Atsushi would've already pulled me on, but for some reason he continued to look up in despair.

"Atsushi," I whine out helplessly, as I tug on his pant leg to get his attention.

Still. He was ignoring me.

"Where were you this morning? I was-"

"You noticed?" he finally says, his voice meek and clearly full of…annoyance? Besides the pony tail, this was rare as well. Atsushi was never annoyed. Well, when it came to me.

"Y-Yes. I noticed, silly. What's-"

"I feel like you've been forgetting about me lately," he says softly, as I watch him close his eyes tightly, twirling the lollipop into the left side of his mouth with his tongue.

"What…what do you mean?" I ask hesitantly.

Sighing out, Atsushi sits up right as a few strands of his hair begin to unravel from the matching coloured holder. "Back at Teiko, when all of us were still a team. Mine-chin had Kuro-chin. Kise-chin had those two. Mido-chin was fine on his own. Akachin didn't need anyone because he had everyone. And then there was me. I got along with mostly everyone, but I didn't have someone who I could walk home with everyday. Hang out with everyday. Until you and I met. I hated high school the first week I started. It was the same as Teiko. I had no one. But then you walked in the gym. You were my…-"

"Salvation?"

Atsushi flashes me a light, playful grin before he continues. "I was going to say the Twinkie to my life, but if you say so. I had finally found a friend like everyone else. I've never had someone like you so I don't know what's acceptable and what isn't. Like going into your room, inviting myself over for dinner. All that. Tora-chin's my best friend. And now she has all these people like Mine-chin and Kagami in her life and I'm suddenly not needed. Tora-chin has so many friends and I'm still alo-"

Clamping Atsushi's mouth shut, I angrily yell at him to shut up.

"T-Tora-"

"I said shut up you big idiot!" I yell out with more hostility, as I find the corner of my wide eyes beginning to overflow with tears.

Shaking my head furiously in disagreement, I begin to explain to him as to how wrong he was. "A-After Taiga, there was no one. Even during our friendship he was my only friend. I had no female friends because all I could talk about was basketball. No one understood me until I stumbled upon this…this lost boy who I knew would love basketball if he allowed himself to grow and love. A-And he did. After he left me, I was back at the beginning. I had no one. And when I came here, I didn't expect to rejoice with him or anything. We were childhood friends. We were almost adults now, it was time to move and make new friends. A-And then I met you. You were exactly like Taiga. So lost. Someone who played basketball but needed time to grow and love as well. You're m-my friend, my brother, my idiot. Back in America Taiga was number one in my life. That was my old life. My new and present one is in Japan, here with you. And right now, always, you'll be my number one pri…ority. Hearing you say that you feel all alone makes me- makes me-"

Rubbing my eyes with the sleeves of my uniform, I find myself breaking down as I begin to cry uncontrollably like a lost child in a supermarket that cannot find their mother. Their loving mother who would then come to grab their hand whole-heartedly, a safe haven that would always love them, hold them and wipe their tears away. Someone like Atsushi who did all those things for me.

Without hesitation he pulls me into his chest as he holds me tightly, resting his chin on the top of my head. All he does is rub my back, starting from my spine, to the middle of my back. In a repeated motion that was all he did. Nothing was said. No words hadn't been needed for an explanation. For our tears did everything.

I began to cry even more as I felt something wet from above drop onto my cheek, running down and joining with my tears as they slid off my face. Rain was to be expected in the forecast today, but I knew the droplet of water was not rain.

This was the first time Atsushi had cried in front of me. And that was all I needed to know that he loved me unconditionally. That he would do so until it was time to part.