Disclaimer: Fairy Tail is not owned by me. If it was, Blue Pegasus would end up having more business ventures. As shown in this paragraph.
AND IM BACK GUYS WITH MY EXAMS DONE! Well, I've got one left but all I have to do is read for that one~
Oh yeah there may or may not be the balls of wrecking in this chappie.
AND NATSU + LUCY IS INTRODUCED OMGZ! And I hope I have all the characterization done correctly, I don't know if I've managed to catch their characters properly :/
So like always, the OC list of introduction will be at the bottom, and I hope you enjoy enough to review~
Sometimes, Carbuncle wonders if he had angered a deity in a past life.
Because seriously, any time he thinks it might go wrong, it does go wrong. As evidenced by the massive spectacle occurring right in front of his face. Malevolent glare set in place; he had to resist the urge to hunt down the owner of Heartfilia Konzern and destroy him.
With a chair. To the face.
Carbuncle didn't understand which genius had the idea - it was a Cobra standard idea, as he's taken to calling all stupid ideas - to ask the Trimens to have a gig here. Why on Earth they decided to hold a concert here, in a train station of all places, was beyond him. Though he wasn't an entrepreneur, or a businessman, and he certainly didn't go to any business specific guilds like 'Love and Lucky', he knew as much as to not holding any music related event somewhere where there were horns.
That was just plain old common sense. But rich people are not exactly known for their common sense, after all.
He was just lucky that they didn't recognise him; otherwise things between them would quickly spiral into a situation that would end with conflict. It was just how they were, and after the Karen Lilica incident they had never been able to see eye-to-eye with the other, as that was just something that they just could not put behind them.
The staccato pitter-patter-pitter-patter of the rain had yet to relent, the punishing droplets crashing heavily into the stain-glass windows that were only there to show how wealthy the station was. But he'd got to give them credit. After all, they built a special room just for hosting gigs with soundproof walls from the outside and everything. The ground, a lustrous and shining marble, took a heavy beating from the dancing fangirls, pulsating from the amplified vibrato of the singers on stage.
Wait a sec - do they have fanboys?
Eyebrow raised, Carbuncle could only stare in disbelief at the amount of male fans that 'The Trimens' had, considering they were infamous for their womanising ways.
Women tended to call Winzip a 'Hundred Nights' for a reason, you know?
And that's a thought I really don't need in my brain space, thank you very much.
Cringing both physically and mentally, he was more than thankful now that he had manage to secure this little niche for himself in the corner, out of the general view of the hormonal teens partying.
Which he still couldn't get over. They were in a train station, not a stadium or an arena or wherever else musicians perform at. Apparently those so-called businessmen will do anything for a little extra cash.
Brought out of his musings by the cries of the horde (that's what the crowd has been dubbed now, as they must've not been the sharpest tool in the shed if they like The Trimen's music), Carbuncle was curious enough to pay attention to the performance, before quickly averting his eyes in disgust.
They were serenading a girl with love songs. Just how low could they go?
Snorting, he moved from the relative safety of the doorway and onto the platform, which was completely deserted. Or he would have, if he wasn't stopped by a call for the 'fiery red headed woman' to get away from the 'doorway' and into their 'embrace'.
Oblivious to the envious gazes of the crowd, he was about to leave. Or he was, before a tall, incredibly muscular bodyguard (for he didn't know what he was, just that he has the look of a bouncer – and by the looks of his muscles, they are obviously steroid-enhanced) stopped him and gestured him towards the stage.
Oh.
Oh.
They meant him.
…What? Was the only thought he could think as he was gifted with the sight of the Horde parting, if only reluctantly, for him to head straight for the stage. Leading him directly into the questionable clutches of the male prostitutes beckoning him towards them – and he knew enough about The Trimens to know where this was going.
He had already had one experience with a male prostitute, and he certainly didn't need another one. Hell, he still couldn't even remember what went on last time he was around Cobra, but he could only assume he didn't want another event like that to happen.
But the question that was on his mind was how they thought he of all people was a girl. Yes, he may have long hair, but that doesn't mean you are instantly a girl. Plus, his current disguise didn't make him look like a girl – he was wearing what he assumed normal people wear, a baggy 'Heart-Kreuz' shirt and jeans.
The only variation was the fact that he had red-hair now, as he dyed it to fit in with his disguise. He didn't want to make people link 'Carbuncle' with this persona, which he has yet to name.
Though if he wanted to really make it effective, he'd have to add a classy fake moustache – they are surprisingly effective, especially if they are of high quality.
…He was being completely serious.
Feeling a nudge from behind, Carbuncle threw a ferocious glare at 'Steroids', who didn't even have the decency to look fazed - he just nudged him forward once more. Getting the idea, he purposefully smacked the guy as he walked away, smirking gleefully as he heard the audible groan as his elbow dug deep into the guy's gut.
Well, might as well get this over with. Carbuncle was half-way there when he was hit with the most glorious of ideas.
He could ruin them. And get some revenge whilst he was at it.
Maybe this could be a good thing after all. A very good thing.
All but running at the stage, he looked more like a demented crab than a human – if, you know, crabs could run forward. But the semantics really don't matter at the moment; all that matters is the possibility of his long awaited revenge.
Revenge is good. Carbuncle likes revenge. Especially when it involves annoyances like Winzip.
Climbing up on stage, the disguised Carbuncle prepared himself mentally for one of the most glorious moments of his life so far.
"So what's your name – not that I care or anything." Tsundere spoke, facing away from him in an attempt to act alluring.
Carbuncle was too busy trying to understand how he could walk in them tight jeans.
"Oh Em Gee," He certainly hoped that Zimi didn't have her catchphrase copyrighted or anything, because he may or may not slightly misuse it in the future, "Like omg like omg-omg-omg-omg-omg-OMG like ERMAHGERD. My name is…" Thinking fast, he threw out the first name that he could think of. "…Angel."
Well, she is a badly dressed stripper, so I'm sure she wouldn't mind being serenaded by the Tri-whores.
"So Angel, did it hurt falling from heaven?" Ignoring the disgusting 'aww's and 'ooo's of the crowd, Snowflake's cheesy pick-up lines made Carbuncle's head hurt.
"Like omg yes it did I had like this killer migraine when my head smacked off the escalators I was like gawd get your act together but did they? No they didn't. Because they aren't even alive and it was so depressing because I had fake nails on and I broke one of them and then my stilettos cracked and my nose got broken and my dress was ripped and my boobs were showing and I fell on a dirty old midget who tried to touch me inappropriately..." Spouting all this in the most obnoxious and pretentious voice in the world, he was quickly stopped by Winzip, who was trying to salvage the situation.
"That's…nice? So what song do you want us to sing to you?" Winzip leant over, trying to look seductive. It might have worked.
If the person he was trying to woo was an actual girl.
"Could you sing 'Wrecking Ball' please? I like so want you to wreck me." Carbuncle wanted so badly to clarify that he would love to wreck them by breaking their heads through a wall, but refrained from doing so – all for his revenge.
"I'd wreck you all night long."
"Yeah…Don't get your hopes up." He had almost forgotten how much he hated Hibiki, but then he remembered his personality.
"So before that, how old are you?"
"Don't you know it's rude to ask a lady her age?" Flicking his hair dramatically, he made a great show of spurning Winzip, getting some heckles from the crowd as a result.
His personal favourite had to be that he looked like a 'drugged up squirrel'. That guy- for it was a guy - had to be given an award for originality at the very least.
"How else am I supposed to know if you are legal?" Carbuncle grudgingly realised that Hibiki knew how to take advantage of situations like these, taking the opportunity to deliver a backhanded compliment as he did so.
"Like, you don't even need to know - I have these things called standards." Too bad for Winzip that Carbuncle was better with words - even if he was currently trying to conform to as many female stereotypes as possible.
"So how do I fit these standards of yours, angel?"
"It's Angel: not angel. Rude - learn to, like, capitalise. And I'm sorry, but for you to fit my standards is if for you to not even exist."
"Harsh babe."
"Like don't even call me 'babe' - it makes you sound like a peadophile." They had been talking for too long, and the crowd was getting restless "Don't you have a song to sing?" Diverting their attention to the matter at hand, Carbuncle was happy to see
them get back on track.
Until they started singing, then Carbuncle desperately wanted to return to the pseudo-flirting – all he had to protect himself from the music was his own thoughts.
Blocking the rest of the world out, Carbuncle did what he did best.
Ignore people.
-(WARNING WRECKING BALL LYRICS + CARBUNCLE'S THOUGHTS ON THEM YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED)-
"We clawed, we chained our hearts in vain," Oh god WHY DID I SAY WRECKING BALL?
"We jumped never asking why," Please just jump off a cliff.
"We kissed; I fell under your spell." I better not have herpes now.
"A love no one could deny," Why do I feel the need to shout OBJECTION!
"Don't you ever say I just walked away," I want to just walk away
"I will always want you," I feel the same. If want is now synonymous with burn in a fire, that is.
"I can't live a lie, running for my life," The irony is killing me right now. Literally.
I will always want you." That feeling is not-so-mutual.
"I came in like a wrecking ball" That's what he said?
"I never hit so hard in love" Domestic abuse is never a good thing.
"All I wanted was to break your walls" You destructive bitch
"All you ever did was wreck me" I would make a joke but I'm too classy for that.
"Yeah, you, you wreck me" I'd love to wreck you - just get me a S.E truck to hit you with.
"I put you high up in the sky" You forced the 'shrooms down my throat
"And now, you're not coming down," They must be some good drugs
"It slowly turned, you let me burn," BURN THE WITCH!
"And now, we're ashes on the ground," WE? I don't remember burning too...
-(WRECKING BALL LYRICS OVER NOW CONTINUE)-
As the crowd started to get more into the song, Carbuncle was steadily becoming more and more ireful, as the music got louder and louder. It was getting to the point where he was hoping someone- anyone would come and save him from this torment.
It didn't matter who it was – it could have been Cobra and he wouldn't have cared.
Though that would only feed the rabid shippers that were a part of his team – he was still confused as to how that particular ship became a thing anyway.
Deciding enough was enough, he discreetly scanned for any exit that he could take advantage of, noting with some dismay that there wasn't any. He could just run off stage, though that would bring far too much attention to him. But at this point he was desperate and annoyed and angry and just didn't particularly care about his public reputation when he was in this disguise.
Because of the whole disguise he's got going on at the moment.
Fishing around in his pocket, he nonchalantly plucked out his Lacrima, smirking in satisfaction as he found that he had two messages.
Actually, make that four – he just got two off Zimi and Eevee respectively.
Making a show of lifting the lacrima to his ears, he widened his eyes exaggeratedly.
Gasped audibly.
And turned on the water works.
Running to the left, he launched himself off the stage, running out of the room. The only thing that got in the way was a pair of guards, who quickly fell to a quick kick to the 'special place'. Leaping over the writhing bodies, he graced them with an insufferable smirk that just spoke of how amusing he found their pain to be, before he escaped out the room.
He wasn't followed, oddly enough. They must have been glad to have him out of the way of their performance.
He continued to run, until he made it to the main lobby. Collapsing onto a nearby wooden bench, he got rid of the crocodile tears before grinning in victory, but not before being interrupted by a young kid who had walked over to see how he was.
"Are you okay?" Looking up, the first thing that he noticed about the child was that he was young and dark and edgy.
But not as dark as 'Arrow', who was the king of edgy. And not as pointy as Cobra, who took the grand prize for making Legolas jealous of his pointy-ness.
In Carbuncle's opinion, the kid looked like he belonged in school, not walking out and about at this time. Geared up in a stereotypical school uniform, he was wearing a navy, almost dark, blue blazer engraved with a dragon sigil on the breast. Beneath was a stark white, neatly pressed polo shirt that was fully buttoned. His trousers showed some sign of wear, but over than that it looked like a variation of a school uniform. The tie, a sanguine red, was done up correctly – then he noticed the chains on the belt hoops, and knew he was trying to be trouble. Other than that, he had a red cap covering his messy white hair, and his eyes were a light blue.
All in all, Carbuncle placed him as kind-of-edgy-but-not-really-and-should-probably-go-back-to-school.
"I'm okay." Not in the mood to talk, Carbuncle tried to get him to go away, though he failed at that.
"That's good," The child, he was around twelve if Carbuncle had to guess, said, before sitting next to him, "what made you sad in the first place?"
"The Trimens." Giving a white lie wouldn't hurt the young boy, he decided.
"Why, what did they do?" The inquisitive boy asked, receiving a monstrous glare in response.
For some strange reason (that he instantly regretted), his temper reached its limit.
"I've just met you. I don't even know you – I don't even know your name. Why in the name of Fiore would I tell you something personal because you asked?" Standing up, he ignored the guilty sensation of lashing out at the kid, and walked away before he hurt the kid's feelings anymore.
"My name is Hale…" Hale shouted.
He didn't get a response, as Carbuncle was long since gone.
Out on the platform, he decided on actually checking his messages now that he was out of public scrutiny. Flipping through the multitude of menus, he peered curiously at their contents. Selecting the first one, he couldn't help but face-palm.
It was off of Cobra.
I saw you getting chat-up by the Trimens.
You should have stabbed them whilst you had the chance. I would have let you charm my snake if you did.
I'll get you two acquainted when you get back, then we can go out and torture Naked Mummy.
Carbuncle didn't even deign that with a response – other than a little text that simply said 'Crimson Nail', 'Ok' and 'You're an Idiot'.
He casually ignored the fact that Cobra knew he was in disguise and why exactly Cobra was in the area
The second text was off Jayne, and was the message that he was most interested in.
Hi~
I saw what mission you picked, and I'm grateful for it – I don't think that I would be able to wipe out an entire guild by myself. Actually I doubt that I would be able to kill anyone at all, so ten million thanks for taking the most unpleasant mission out of the bunch!
I told the others what mission you are going on, and most of them were also hesitant to go with you. Zimi wanted to desperately go, but we managed to persuade her to not chase after you by taking… extreme measures. Let's just say that when cosplaying as a yaoi couple, don't force Eevee to be the other pair.
But the roleplaying was fun... I wrote the script! :D
But that doesn't mean that you'll be alone. We've all decided to try and keep in contact with you, and Blaine said that she'll meet with you at the platform.
The other teams are Zimi and myself, and Eevee x Arrow (who are 200% made for each other, by the way.) Though, I did hear some strange information from Eevee that a red-haired girl completely wrecked The Trimens. That, I would've paid good money to see.
Anyway, stay safe, if not for us then for the mission.
XOXOXO
Not knowing what to say, other than a simple 'Will do', Carbuncle was slightly stunned by the care that was put in the message. Everyone knew that Jayne was naturally a nice person but having it aimed directly at him was something he'd certainly have to get used to. Knocking himself out of the odd sensation he moved onto Zimi's, though he already feared what it might be.
Though he was curious about the yaoi couple…
ER. MER. GERD. ME. AND. JAYNE. ARE. INFILTRATING. DORA. THE. EXPLORER.
DID YOU KNOW THAT SNIPER NO-SNIPING IS ACTUALLY A MIDDLE AGED MAN GOING THROUGH A MIDLIFE CRISIS? NO? SAME. AND WHO HAS TO CONSOLE HIM? ME.
I HATE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW. But lol good luck have fun.
Don't have too much Yaoi fun-times with Cobra without recording it~ xx
Now that was a text that he didn't even bother responding to, and just left it as is. He was most curious about the text from Eevee however.
Hi Carbuncle,
I just wanted to say good luck during your mission, and that I don't mind being teamed with Arrow. And he also says good luck.
Hope you stay safe.
He just replied with a quick 'thnks, u 2', and was about to put his phone away before getting interrupted by another text off of Cobra.
I knew you were the type who'd love to feel the blood of the weak on your hands.
We should get together one time and go man-hunting.
Good Luck with your murder, I know you'll love it.
Oh yeah and watch out for this guy roaming around trying to murder people.
Carbuncle could only read in mild disbelief at the text, before realising that Cobra has evolved from a man-prostitute to a sadistic gigolo.
Impressive. Real impressive.
"Pardon me but have you seen a guy with blue hair around here?" Turning rapidly, Carbuncle came face-to-face with a worried looking Blaine, who hadn't recognised him in his disguise. "I'm not used to this, so any help would be good…"
What does she mean 'Not used to this'?
"Blaine. It's me. I am Carbuncle."
"No you're not. You do not have blue hair."
"It's magic hair dye."
"How quaint. What is that?"
Why did he feel like this was going to be a very tiring mission?
"Sorry, pardon me, but we have to sit down."
"…I never realised people were so rude."
"Blaine, we are off to Narcisca. Everyone goes there."
"…Really?"
"Yes Blaine, yes indeed."
Carbuncle frowned, trying in vain to get a seat for the two of them to sit down on, but failing massively. The pair of them had to fight their way to the very back of the carriage before one became available for them to use, and it wasn't even vacant – they had to sit opposite another pair, who didn't look to be in the greatest shape in the world.
The salmon-haired male looked to be in horrific shape, his clothes absolutely tattered showing of his muscles, and he looked as if he could keel over and die at any moment. The blonde looked slightly better, with only a few scrapes on her body and her clothes only slightly ruffled. Though his eyes did catch sight of a few zodiac keys around her waist, curiosity rising when he picked out three of the Ecliptic Zodiac.
They are rare after all, with it being that only twelve exist.
He wasn't surprised that people haven't sat next to them, due to the state they were in – but they had to sit somewhere, and Blaine didn't seem to particularly care about their state so he'll have to suck it up and be a man.
Despite the fact that the pink man looked as if he would keel over and throw up any second now. And the blonde looked as if she wasn't the happiest person in the world with the situation.
"Is it okay if we sit here?" Carbuncle asked, knocking the girl out of whatever reverie she was in. Being given the go ahead, the duo sat down, with Carbuncle being given the window seat.
This may seem like a good thing, but he was in the direct path of the sick one.
That means that he may be covered in sick at any possible moment.
That was bad.
Very bad.
He did not want to be covered in sick. Wait - who does want to be covered in vomit anyway?
"Is he okay?" Blaine asked, and Carbuncle seconded this notion. He didn't want to be seen as a witness to murder. The girl just awkwardly laughed, muttered something nonsensical before replying.
"He…he is okay. Well, I think he is. He supposedly gets like this all the time when he is on public transport." Giggling awkwardly, the blonde seemed to be at a loss as to what to say, the fragmented laughs being punctuated by the occasional 'aye'.
…Aye?
Both he and Blaine were caught unaware as a blue cat rose up from behind her, wielding a piece of fish like a blade and floating with a large pair of angel wings.
Okay, I want to get me one of them bird-cat things. I will call it Fluffy and I will love it always as he will be mine, and we will rule the world with a legion of multi-coloured bird-cats that will strike fear into the hearts of millions. Ignoring the mini-rant coming from his subconscious, Carbuncle felt slightly lost as to why he wanted one so much. He blamed exposure to Zimi and Jayne's brainwaves.
But, whilst Carbuncle knew that the thing was cute (though his masculinity loathed saying it) it didn't remove the question of just what that thing is.
A sentiment shared by Blaine, who asked the question on both their minds.
"Oh, Happy is an Exceed," Smiling beatifically, the blonde's smile belied some form of not-quite-innocence, but something entirely. She seemed nice.
"An Exceed…I've never heard of them before…how intriguing." Tilting her head to the side, she pulled out a notepad from a tiny bag at her side – he was legitimately surprised that he hadn't noticed it until now. "Please, elaborate." She seemed eager to learn more about the race of winged cats.
Not to say he didn't want to know: just that he did not share the same enthusiasm she did.
"Oh…well…I don't particularly know the details myself. Oh yeah, my name is Lucy, I completely forgot to introduce myself." The newly named Lucy (no surname, which was slightly suspicious to Carbuncle) introduced herself, holding out a hand and a smile to the both of them.
"Pleasure to meet you, Lucy. My name is Alex, Alex Leblanc." Carbuncle introduced himself with a fake name, before introducing his team-mate for her as Blaine seemed far too busy learning everything she could about the cat to do it herself.
"Nice to meet you. Oh yeah, this is Natsu." She gesticulated towards the almost comatose boy, who only grunted in response and muttered a brief 'hello' before going back to bemoaning his own existence.
To Carbuncle, his Crystal Magic felt uneasy around the pink-haired man. It felt as if he was a Slayer of some kind, but that was absurd considering the rarity of the magic.
"So where exactly are you two going?" Reclining backwards, he over-heard about the 'Aera' magic that the flying cat wielded, and was slowly becoming interested in that more than the conversation.
"Well, Natsu and I are making our way towards Narcisca – how about you?" Lucy, growing exasperated by Natsu's moaning, laid his head down on her lap before answering the question.
"Narcisca? Why would you go there? Are you two getting married or something?" Ignoring the sarcastic 'like you and Cobra' from Blaine, he felt that it made sense. In his mind it made sense – the two of them looked like a couple who had been together for a long time, so why wouldn't they go to a town known for being beautiful to have a wedding.
And he may be a man, but even he could tell that they looked right together.
"Me? And Natsu? Getting married?" She seemed to mull over the prospect, despite her outburst at the thought of it. "Wait, where are you going?"
"We are going to Narcisca too; we need to sort some things out there to make our own life easier." Shrugging off the question, he asked a question of his own.
Or would have, if he wasn't interrupted by Natsu's delayed reaction.
"Am I not good enough to be married to you, Luigi?" despite his currently beleaguered state, Natsu exploded at her, inciting her own annoyance as they degenerated into arguments.
But even he could tell they were the type of arguments only friends go through, where they knew the other wouldn't get hurt by what's being said.
He even remembered being called 'a horny squirrel' once and not being insulted by it.
"Luigi I've already been promised to someone you can't marry me."
"Why would I want to marry you anyway? You're the type of guy who'd end up leaving his tighty-whities on the bathroom floor."
"What are tighty-whities?"
"…I forget that you're an idiot sometimes."
"Wait why couldn't we be married? I sleep with you anyway."
It was at that point that Carbuncle realised that he might have been better off standing up.
He felt like a fifth wheel, without anyone to talk to.
Oh well.
He'd be the best damned fifth wheel in the world.
Chapter 5, Fin~
OMG GUIZ IM BACK I MISSED YOU ALL! I hope this chappie was worth the wait. Normally, I wouldn't put the warnings, but I know how people feel about Miley Cyrus so I broke the rules and put some warnings.
So anyway, here's the OCs so far;
So onto the OCs already shown in the story (other than Carbuncle):
The Lazy Bitch's: Zimi
QueenKazza's: Jayne
Hikari-Angel143's: Eevee
motordog's: Blaine
Arcobaleno-Lover's: 'Arrow'
Cute-Kawaii-Girl's: Hale
Oc's mentioned:
Saiyan-Styles': ? - (Hidden to avoid spoilers :D)
Hollow-Kyuubi's: ? - (Hidden to avoid spoilers)
Now that that is done - THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR CONTINUED SUPPORT :D - Your reviews are awesome! We are at 28 reviews/ 14 Follows and 9 favourites~ I hope you liked this one enough to continue reviewing~
So until next time,
HalcyonNight.
P.S: Remember - Any questions, just drop me a Pm and I'll answer them to the best of my ability - even if it is something as simple as what a word means~