When I reached his door, I was beating it down. I debated on busting in, but thought better of it in case he wasn't dressed. When he opened the door, he was in guardian mode.

"Rose, it's late-."

"Dimitri, it's Lissa… She's dying. Take me to the academy, please."

"What? Rose, are you sure?" He asked. I was hysterical. He knew I was serious.

"I don't have time to explain now, I'll explain to you in the car. Please, Dimitri. Take me to her… I can't lose her." I begged him. He nodded. He put on his boots as I ran upstairs to grab my shoes. We met back at the front door. Eddie and Guardian Liam must have heard the commotion because they rounded the corner as we exited.

"Where are you going?"

"I don't have time to explain, Eddie." Dimitri said.

"Belikov, think about what you're doing." He said. Dimitri shook his head.

"I know what I'm doing." He snapped at him before we ran to the van. Tears were streaming down my cheeks as we both jumped in. He threw the van into reverse and hauled ass out of there. "Now, what's going on? Are there strigoi, do I need to alert the others?" He asked.

"No… She… She-." I stopped, realizing what I would be doing if I told.

"Rose, I don't have time for this. I need to know what's going on." He demanded.

"She cuts herself. She cuts herself a lot, and this time… it's bad, and she keeps doing it. It's like she can't stop. There's something dark inside of her, and when she needs release that's what she does, but this time she keeps doing it. She's covered in blood, she's lost so much, I don't know how she was conscious." I told him, tears streaming down my face.

"Rose, she's gonna be okay."

"She's not… Dimitri, they're going to put her on all kind of medicine, and people are gonna make a big deal about it, and she's never going to forgive me." I told him. He reached over and took my hand in his.

"Look at me, Rose." I turned to him. "She's going to be okay, and she'll forgive you. You're a good friend for this. You could be saving her life." He said. I nodded once. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to slip back into her head. She was barely conscious now. She couldn't stand, even though she kept trying. Her bathroom was covered in blood. A slight sob rocked through my body. I felt Dimitri squeeze my hand. In this moment, I needed that, just that slight pressure to let me know that he was here for me.

"Is she okay?"

"She's barely conscious now." I whispered. When he pulled into the gates and the guardians let us in, I didn't even let him get the van parked. I jumped out, and started running. He shut the van off, and followed after me. I ran upstairs in the moroi dorms and tried to open Lissa's door. Locked. By the time Dimitri and the dorm matron had reached me, I stepped back and kicked her door in.

"Lissa?" I called, running to her bathroom. There she laid, half unconscious, covered in blood. It was worse seeing it through my own eyes then seeing and feeling it through hers. I hit my knees beside her in the pool of blood surrounding her.

"Rose, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I couldn't stop. I don't know what happened." She cried. I pulled her bloodied body into my arms and just held her while she sobbed. Her arms were bad. They'd take months to heal from the looks of the gashes. "I'm sorry."

"Shhh… It's gonna be okay." I promised her. Dimitri stood at the door, staring down at the two of us. I looked up at him, looking for some kind of moral support, which his eyes gave me. He nodded at me once and gave me a small smile. The dorm matron had already run off to get help.

"We're going to get you some help, Lissa." He promised her. She looked up at me.

"They're going to think I'm crazy. They're going to put me in an asylum." She whispered.

"No, they're not. You really think I'd let them do that to you? Not a chance." I promised her.

"We're going to have to tell them about you two though." Dimitri told us. I just nodded.

"I know." I whispered. I hadn't ever wanted Lissa and I's bond to be public knowledge, and I sure as hell didn't want it to become public knowledge like this. A few minutes later, Kirova, Alberta, and the short redheaded lady from the clinic were in the room. Kirova and Alberta frowned down at me.

"What's going on? It's very obvious we've been left out of some serious loop." Kirova said. Bitch. The nurse frowned at them for being so inconsiderate.

"Those are going to need stitches sweetheart." She told her. I knew they would. "We need to get you down to the clinic."

"I'll carry her." Dimitri said. I shook my head at him.

"I've got her." I said, simply. He nodded once, not going to argue. I was covered in her blood already anyways. I helped her to stand, and then scooped her up into my arms. Lissa was little, and wasn't heavy. I noticed that she still had the razor blade held tightly in her palm. "Lissa put it down." I whispered.

"Rose… I-." I gave her a look.

"I know. It's over now. Put it down." I said. She nodded and threw the razor blade onto the floor. I nodded and carried her out of the bathroom and down the stairs. As we walked, Dimitri looked at me.

"You okay?" He asked.

"I'm fine." I told him, my voice hard. I was trying to conceal all of the emotion I was feeling to be strong for her. It was then I saw someone running towards us. As he got closer, it recognized it to be Christian Ozera.

"Oh my god, what happened? Lissa, what did you do?" He asked her. She didn't answer him. She just buried her head into my shoulder. A lot of the students were standing outside now. New traveled fast here and I'd known that. This had spread like wildfire. I kept my head up high as we walked past each and every one of them. I took her into the office and laid her down on the cot. Kirova and Alberta pulled Dimitri aside while I stayed with Lissa. I knew he would have been a lot more calm and collected to explain it to them than I would have been.

"Rose, don't leave me… please." She begged.

"Lissa, I'm not going anywhere… I'm right here." I promised her. She nodded. The nurse went to cleaning her up, revealing how deep the gashes actually were. They were horrible. Lissa cried and winced every time she touched her. I held her hand as she cried from the pain. "It's okay… It's okay Lissa." She finally numbed her arms so she could stitch her up. I winced for her then, as she drove the needle through her skin, sewing her back up like she was a rag doll. The image made me angry, so I took a few steps away, calming myself.

"Rose?" Lissa called.

"I'm right here." I said, still not walking back over to her.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

"I'm fine." I promised her. The nurse wrapped her arms up, and told her she was through. I helped Lissa sit up, and met her gaze. "Look what you've gotten us into kid." I teased.

"I'm so sorry, Rose." She said, a tear leaking down her face. I shook my head.

"Don't apologize. We're going to get through this, like we've gotten through everything else. If I doubted it, I'd have snatched you up and ran with you, but I haven't. As much as I want to do that for you, I can't. We're going to survive, like we always do." I told her, taking her face in my hands.

"I can't survive here without you, Rose."

"You're going to be fine. Lissa, I know it's hard, but we're gonna make it." I promised. She shook her head. Kirova and Alberta walked in then, followed by Dimitri.

"We'd like to talk to Lissa alone, please Miss Hathaway." Kirova said.

"No… don't leave, Rose… please." Lissa begged. I turned to Dimitri.

"Come on, Rose. They just wanna talk to her for a minute." He promised me.

"We don't have to leave right now, do we?" I asked him, my eyes falling back on her.

"No… Not right yet. We've got things to deal with." He told me. I nodded. I turned back to Lissa.

"I'll be right back, okay." I promised her.

"Rose, don't leave… please." I took her face in my hands.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right outside. I'll be back, I promise." I told her. She just nodded and watched as I walked away. I didn't want to leave her, but I knew they wouldn't let me stay. Dimitri shut the door behind us as we exited. I didn't stop in the office. I walked straight outside into the morning air, letting it wash over my face. I stared off into the horizon, taking deep; deliberate breathes hoping to keep myself in check. I felt the tears forming, but I did my damndest to blink them back.

"Rose?"

"What are they talking to her about?" I whispered.

"They're asking her about the bond. I explained everything the best I could from your point of view, but they wanted it from hers." He told me. I just nodded, still not looking at him.

"What are they going to do to her?" I finally asked.

"They said there were some drugs they could try, that should help her. They're going to talk to her and see how she feels about it." He said.

"She'll turn them down."

"She really has no other options here. If she does turn it down, we're gonna need you to talk her into it. Unless you really want her sent to an asylum, where she can't hurt herself anymore." I turned and swung, punching the brick wall next to me hard. It was in that moment, everything I was feeling came flooding out of me. The moment the words left his lips, it was like he opened a flood gate. The tears began streaming down my face, as I swung again, my fist connecting with the wall again. The pain felt good only because for a split second, it took my mind off all of the shit going on around me.

"Rose… Rose, stop." Dimitri said, trying to grab me. I shook my head, trying to break out of his hold. He finally was able to grab me, and stop me from moving around. "Hey… you're going to get through this." He assured me. I shook my head. "Yes, you are. I'm going to help you through this. Lissa is going to be fine. They're going to take care of her here."

"But not like I can." I growled.

"I'm sorry, Rose. I'm sorry that you can't be here to take care of her. You've got to let them do it. By being away, by being with us, training… You'll be able to take care of her better. Remember, one day you might be out in the world, where the wards won't protect you. She'll need you then, more than ever." He told me.
"It's not the strigoi she needs protecting from. It's herself. I can do that. I can protect her better than these people can. They won't know when she's lying, when she's screaming out for help but no one can give it to her because they don't know. You don't understand, and you won't ever, Dimitri. Stop pretending like you know where I'm coming from because you don't." I cried. He shook his head, and took my face in his hands.

"I'm not pretending to understand, Rose. I know that I couldn't understand if I tried. I'm trying to help you. I know by helping you, I can help her. You have to be strong for her. It's obvious that she needs you. Roza, you have to get her through this, and to do that… You have to be sane, and right now… You're not." He told me. It was in that moment, all the fight and anger flooded from my body, because I found myself lost in his eyes. I think he noticed, but he never looked away. It was then that I broke out of the trance when someone approached.

"How is she? Is she okay?" He asked. Ozera.

"She's fine." I growled.

"I knew she was cutting, but I didn't think it was that bad. I don't understand, what happened? Why did she do that?" He asked.

"Look, I'm sorry to sound like a bitch, because it's quite obvious that you care for her, but I'm really not in the mood to discuss this with you. You can talk to her later, and I'm sure she'll explain it all, but right now, I just want you out of my damn face." I said. He stepped back, and nodded. He finally turned and walked out, obviously caught off guard by me basically jumping him. "Damn it… I didn't mean too-." I cut myself off.

"It's okay. I think he understood that now wasn't a good time." Dimitri said, looking to where Christian had disappeared. I just nodded. I finally looked up at him, and sighed. I heard the door open, and turned to find Kirova and Alberta.

"She's agreed to the medication to see how it works. She said if she doesn't like it, she won't take it anymore." Alberta said. I just nodded, happy she'd agreed to that much.

"She's also going to be paying the psychologist a visit every three days. We'll evaluate her that way, and see how much she's progressed and maybe the medicine won't be necessary anymore." Kirova said. I nodded. It all sounded good for the most part, except I'd been half expecting them to ask me to return to the academy. I was disappointed when they didn't.

"Why didn't you say anything to us about this, Rose?" Alberta asked.

"It wouldn't have changed anything. I ran away with her, you were going to kick me out regardless. It was a need-to-know thing. You didn't need to know." I said, my voice clipped and hard. Kirova just looked away, proving I was right. "What is the medicine you're giving her going to do?" I asked.

"It'll block her from whatever magic she possesses, meaning whatever is causing her to feel the need to cut herself will be shut off." Kirova said.

"She won't be able to use her magic anymore?"

"No… We think that the magic is what's making her crazy." Alberta said. "Vladimir and Anna were bonded, just as you two are. Anna ended up killing herself from the madness it drove her too."

"Was she the bonder or the bondee?" I asked. Alberta looked down.

"Bondee." She finally said. I nodded. Perfect, as if I didn't have enough to worry about.

"And Vladimir?"

"He was a spirit user. It's the rare element that some moroi wield. It's what Lissa's specialized in, which enabled her to bond the two of you, and is the reason she's going through these darkness spells." She told me. I nodded.

"Can I go see her now?" I asked.

"Yeah, go ahead. We need to talk to Dimitri." She said. I threw an apologetic glance back to him, and he gave me a reassuring smile. I walked back inside, and to the bed Lissa was sitting on the edge of. I smiled at her, as I walked in.

"Did they tell you?" I nodded.

"Yeah. I'm glad you agreed on your own terms. If you would have turned it down, I would have had to talk you into it." I told her. She smiled slightly.

"I figured as much." She said.

"How are you doing?"

"I'm alright now. My arms don't sting as bad anymore. They gave me some pain reliever." She told me. I nodded.

"Good." I said.

"I'm sorry you had to rush all the way here to save me." She murmured.

"I wasn't going to let you lay on the bathroom floor and die, because I had a feeling that was where it was heading." I said.

"I didn't mean to do all of that. It was like after the first cut, I wasn't able to control myself. Whatever's inside me is bad. It's dark. I don't like it." I shook my head.

"Me either, but it's a part of you, so it's something we have to deal with." I said. It was obvious that it was a part of me too since I was the bondee. I wasn't going to bring that up though. I was hoping it wouldn't come to that. "Will you do me a favor?" I asked.

"Yeah, of course." She said.

"When you see Ozera again, apologize for me, please."

"What'd you do?" She asked, obviously concerned.

"I didn't do anything. He came up to me outside and asked about you, and I sort of lost it on him. I yelled at him. I didn't mean too, but I did. I didn't mean too. I kind of lost it outside, and he was there at the wrong time." She just nodded. "He cares about you."

"I know he does."

"Do you like him?" I asked her. She looked away from me, meaning that she did. I shook my head. "Boy, we're a mess." I told her. She nodded. Dimitri then walked in.

"Rose, we probably need to be heading back." I nodded.

"Can I help her back to her room?" I asked.

"Yeah, they've got her bathroom pretty much cleaned up." He said.

"Good." I told him. I turned to her. "Can you walk?"

"Yeah." She said, standing. She was a little wobbly, so I wrapped an arm around her waist, and helped her to her room. When we got there, they were spraying the bathroom to get the metallic smell out that all the blood had left. I helped her into bed and sat down.

"You gonna be okay?" I asked. She nodded.

"I should be now. Thank you… for coming." She said. I smiled.

"I told you I'd always be here to save you. I just making good on my promise." I told her. She nodded. I hugged her, and went into her bathroom, picking up the bloody razor blade from the sink. I rinsed it off, and put it in my back pocket. I then walked back into the room and hugged her one more time. "If you need me… well, I'll know." I said. She smiled.

"Dimitri?" She asked. He looked up.

"Yes?"

"Thank you, for bringing her here." He smiled.

"Not a problem, Princess." He said. We turned and walked out, leaving her. I was silent on the walk to the van. We got in, and started back to the estate. The ride there was pretty much silent.

"I was half expecting them to ask you to stay." He finally said.

"I was too." I whispered. I stared out the window. The van fell silent. When we got back to the estate, the sun had set, so everyone would be awake soon. When we got out of the van, I grabbed Dimitri's arm gently.

"Hey…" I said. He turned.

"Yes?"

"Thank you… for taking me to her." I whispered. He nodded.

"It's obviously a good thing I did." He told me.

"After what Eddie said, I was sort of scared you'd change your mind." I admitted. He shook his head.

"I knew the decision I was making." He told me. I smiled slightly.

"I don't know what I would have done without you today." I admitted. It was hard for me to admit that I needed anyone, but it was obvious that I needed him today. I saw something shine through his eyes, before he looked down.

"It wasn't a problem." He finally said. I wrapped my arms around him, hugging him tight. He wound his arms around my waist, and held me. I buried my face into his chest and took a few deep breathes to keep myself composed. He pressed his face to my hair. "You'll get through this." He assured me. I just nodded. I took a final deep breath and pulled away.

"Thanks." I said, before walking inside. When I walked in, Landon looked up and gasped. It was then I realized that I was still covered in Lissa's blood. I looked like I'd committed a murder.

"Rose… what happened?" He asked. Eddie entered the room, as Dimitri came in behind me. He looked to me, and then to Dimitri.

"What's going on?" He asked, looking at Dimitri.

"None of your concern, Castille." I growled, still upset about his words earlier.

"Watch it, Hathaway." He snapped, taking a step towards me.

"Fuck you, Eddie." I snapped at him. He started to come after me, but Dimitri stepped between the two of us.

"Don't… Eddie, let it go." He said.

"Did you hear how she spoke to me? Dimitri, you're letting her get off with way too much. You're not disciplining her. You're letting her do as she pleases, and giving in to her every whim." He said. Dimitri's eyes met mine. He was asking if he could explain to him, so he wouldn't keep getting grilled for what was going on.

"Go ahead." I said, before walking straight through the house and out the back door. Landon called after me, but I didn't bother turning. I didn't want to deal with any of them. I sat down against the fence, staring up into the night sky. I pulled the razor out of my pocket, glaring at it. All of this was caused by nothing but a small piece of metal. I ran the blade over my finger, slicing it open. The blood rushed to the surface, and I sighed. It wasn't long before the door opened. I expected Dimitri, so I didn't turn. I smelt clove cigarettes and soon realized it was Adrian.

"Rough night?" He asked; glass of what looked like liquor in his hands.

"Rough would be an understatement." I said. He offered me the glass. I attempted to raise an eyebrow, but he just moved closer with it, showing that he was being serious. I took the glass and downed it. It was vodka… hard vodka. I didn't make a face though. Adrian smiled and sat down beside me.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"How are you supposed to feel when you find out you might end up going crazy and killing yourself?" I asked. He smiled.

"Well, you're asking the right person, since I am pretty much crazy." He said, chuckling.

"I'm serious." I finally said. He sighed.

"I heard that you're bonded." He finally said.

"You know? How?"

"I have my ways. Word travels fast at court. Then, word gets back to me." He said. I nodded.

"Awesome. Now, everyone knows."

"I could help you guys." He told me.

"How?" I asked. He took my hand in his, and closed his eyes. I felt his magic flare up, and looked down to see where I'd cut myself with the razor was now gone.

"You're a spirit user too?" I whispered. He nodded.

"Surprise."

"Woah…I had no idea. I'd never heard of anyone else like-."

"Because I kept it under wraps just like you guys did." He told me.

"How could you help us?" I asked. He shrugged.

"I don't know, but I'd do my damndest to try." He promised. He looked up at me. "I knew you were bonded the moment I met you, Rose."

"How?"

"I can tell in the colors of your aura." He said.

"My what?" I asked.

"Your aura. It's the colors that surround you. Spirit makes you perceptive. Each person has a color, a distinct color. Yours was a dark purple, sometimes black. It's the darkness from Lissa's spirit, and the same color as hers." He said. I just nodded, not knowing how to respond to that. We sat in silence for awhile, before he stood up.

"You want another drink?" He asked.

"I'd love one, but I don't know if Dimitri's gonna make me practice." I said.

"He's not. He hasn't gotten any sleep. He'll be grumpy. He'll probably call it off for today." He told me. I sighed.

"I better pass this time." He shrugged.

"Suit yourself." He said, walking inside. A few minutes later, Dimitri walked out. I sighed.

"I'm sorry about all that. I don't know what happened. I had an outburst. I'm sorry. I'll apologize to him if I need to." I said. He shook his head.

"No… He understood for the most part." I just nodded. "We're not practicing today, if that's why you're out here."

"It's not. I just wanted some fresh air, and for no one to follow me to my room asking me what was going on. I figured I was safest out here." I told him. He smiled slightly.

"You should go change out of those bloody clothes and get some sleep." He said.

"I couldn't sleep now if I wanted to." I muttered. I stared up into the dark sky at the stars and the moon, and sighed. I turned to him. "What if I really do go crazy? What if I go off the deep end worse than Lissa, and kill myself, like Anna?" I asked.

"It's not going to happen." He said, firmly.

"You don't know that. I don't know what this bond brings. What if it gets really bad? What if there's nothing I can do?" I murmured. He grabbed my face.

"You are not going to lose it. You're strong. You'll fight your way through this." He told me.

"I don't know if I'm strong enough to fight what's inside me." I whispered. He knelt down and met my eyes for a second.

"You're strong, Rose. You'll fight through this." He said, conveying everything he was feeling that moment in his eyes. I was lost in them, and my mind was like an egg on hot pavement… scrambled. I didn't know what I was doing, what I was thinking. Everything was so messed up in my head, that when it happened, I was in complete shock. He was so close, and I was so lost and confused. I don't know what willed me to do it, but I leaned forward… and I kissed him. What shocked me more than anything, was that… he had kissed back. The moment I realized, I stepped away from him, my hand flying to my lips. The razor blade I'd held in my hand clattered to the ground. I didn't look down.

"Oh my god…. I'm-." I didn't know what to say. I quickly gathered myself, and ran for the house, upstairs and inside. The moment I was in the safety of my room, I locked the door. I laid my back against the door, taking deep breathes trying to calm myself down. I'd just fucked up… royally.