AN: He's such a dork. I love this idiot.
Chapter 58 (EPOV)
Journal of E. M. Cullen
Ruler of Cullenopeia, Tamer of Dragons and Captain of Forks High Baseball Team
(True Love of Maiden Isabella Marie of the Swan Kingdom)
Dear Keeper of my Innermost Secrets of the Realm,
Tonight, I am 1/2 a man!
My heart's desire has officially stated her mutual love for me! I understand that at the time she was being attacked by monstrous bloodsuckers from the insect realm, but I think she meant those words. Though to be truthful, she probably won't say it again. Or admit she said them in the first place.
That's okay, because I'm nothing if not persistent. I knew we were destined from the very first moment I first laid eyes on her. I'm sure she felt the same. My Isabella is funny. She was just joking when she told me to go away. I think.
That doesn't matter, because like Tanis Half-Elven and Laurana Kanan. We are destined! Never shall a freshly cut Christmas tree darken our door! It's like the pine needles have been created to show our perfect partnership!
Someday she shall marry me! Huzzah! I hope I don't have to wait until I'm 90.
The fair Isabella also kissed my manhood. I don't think she liked it. Emmett just told me practice makes perfect. Now I just need to convince her to practice. That's going to be a hard one.
Anyway, tomorrow my love and I will helping clean Emmett's yard. It's like the wastelands of Dragoon. I need to put on more Benadryl and get some sleep to gain my stamina. (Hopefully, my sweet will let me kiss her beautiful mounds!)
Fare thee well!
King Edward