AN: Hee hee.

Chapter 66

"Don't you love dancing?" My kid asked with a smile.

"No, Fred Astaire, I don't like the Cha Cha." I tried to pull out a Triscuit. I was hard, because I was pinned by his arms. "My middle name isn't Ginger Rodgers."

"Who are they?"

Sometimes I forget if it doesn't have a ball or a dragon, Baseball Boy is clueless.

"Famous dancers."

"Oh! Are they on Dancing With the Stars?" He asked with that pretty, blank eyed smile. I wanted to rub his pretty head. The one with hair.

"They're dead."

He looked wide eyed at me and stopped dancing. "That's so sad! Did it happen recently?"

"Umm...no." He was giving me a headache.

A rain drop hit my head. Maybe it was a fluke.

"Is it starting to rain?" He asked.

No, Sherlock. It must be Uncle Jim Bob spitting on you. Actually, at this party it was a good probability.

"It seems so, kid...maybe we should..."

It has been said that rain on a wedding day was good luck. I don't think the rocket scientists that came up with that belief took into the consideration the torrential downpour that rained down on us. It made the guests look like a drowned rats.

Cousin Skeeter yelled at Grandpa Paw Paw, "I told ya to bring an umbrella!"

He punched poor Paw Paw in the face. What was wrong with these people? The man was frail and ninety.

I was surprisingly concerned over nothing, as Baseball Boy pulled me towards the house. Paw Paw crashed into Skeeter and started to rip out his mullet. Skeeter cried, "Paw Paw, stop! Help!"

Chief Charlie, soaking wet stomped over grumbling, "Damn Paw Paw! That geezer is a menace."

I wasn't able to watch the elderly man wrestle my father to the ground, because the stampede of the drenched pushed my kid and I towards the front porch.

The giant's gargantuan father came out of the house. He yelled, "The shitter's backed up and shit is all over the carpet. Y'all need to get some buckets and rags. Boy, get your daddy a beer and a mop!"

He pointed at a glum giant. Everyone else ran towards the abandoned cars on the lawn.

My kid pulled me towards a rusty KIA and pushed me in the backseat. He landed on top of me with a grin. "Hi there."

"Are you going to try and seduce me in a dirty, old car?" It smelled like skunk.

He kissed my hair. "I thought we could make-out a little and wait for the rain to stop."

I liked his lips.

"Sure."

We started kissing and that's when I heard the giggling. My kid and I looked up to find a leering Grandmaw staring at us.

"That's how I conceived Emmett's daddy! It was in the back of my daddy's Studebaker," the old woman cackled. "It seems this wedding has free entertainment!"

Worst wedding ever.