AN: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. I really do appreciate it. If you flounced, I apologize for the stupidity. Wait I minute, you wouldn't be reading this anyway.

Let's just keep the stupid coming. :0)

Chapter 71

I like kissing Baseball Boy, even more than watching TV. However, the combination of kissing and watching TV makes the perfect Saturday afternoon. If only I could add in eating. I really could use an ice cream sandwich.

I had one eye on an old I Love Lucy while we locked lips on my bed. I really would watch anything that was filmed in black and white. Lucy and Ethel were once again getting into all kinds of mischief. I was trying not to laugh at their antics. That would be rude to my kid.

He pulled away when I was attempting to shove my tongue in his mouth. I was left looking like a frog trying to catch a fly. "What?"

"Bella, I was thinking about what we want to do tonight," he stated.

I wrinkled my nose. Which he instinctively kissed. That should get him back into the mood. "I thought we could do this all night. Almost all night. We can order a Chinese and eat it here."

"On the bed?"

"Off my body, if you'd like." I tried to look innocent, but that wasn't a look I could pull off easily.

Baseball Boy's eyes went dark and his grip tightened on my waist. Eureka.

I had just threw in my line and I only needed to reel him in.

Oh God. Chief Charlie and his obsession with fishing was finally catching up to me. Hopefully, I would actually catch something unlike my father.

Instead, my kid stood up. "We should probably cool things off."

"Are you ending this?" I questioned. I was not a happy camper.

He went back to me and wrapped his arms around me. That wasn't really necessary. "Of course not! I just think if we stay here that we'll go too far. I want to wait a bit longer."

If he just said that we wouldn't had to have all the hugging. He was suffocating me with those boy muscles.

"Oh yes. We're back to the marriage talk. We're going to be ninety year old virgins. I take that back. We'll be one hundred and nine year old virgins, because I think we need to take our time to get to know each other before taking such a big step like marriage."

He ruffled my hair like I was his dog. Oh no. That is not happening. He said, "You're so silly. I was thinking prom night we can profess our love with our bodies."

Oh come on now.

"That's a little cliched," I replied. "Prom is already going to be horrible, so why add in our destined horrible first time. I say, let's just do it and get it over with. We then work our way up to an actual pleasurable experience."

He pouted. "That isn't romantic!"

"Neither will the feeling I'll have when you try to cram that large rod into my small hole. First times are not romantic. Movies and television shows lie, but the girls in the locker room don't. Well...about that. Everything else that comes out of their traps is questionable."

"Our prom night will be magical!"

I doubted it. Then I had a nefarious plan.

"Mary Jane told me that it was Forks High tradition that the guys come up with elaborate ways to ask their dates to the big dance," I stated, as brightly as I could. The thought of these displays made me want to mock them, not to be the one getting one.

Baseball Boy, as expected, got excited. "This is fantastic! I can dress up like a knight and..."

"I like pirates." I tried to smile at him.

"The scourges of the seven seas! They are dastardly beasts!" He started running his fingers through his hair in distress.

My kid hated pirates. All pirates. This plan was foolproof.

"We can just hangout here instead," I suggested.

"Captain Hook is a menace," he complained bitterly. "How can you like a cartoon?"

Of course, his brain would immediately go to Disney.

I shrugged. "I was thinking the attractive one on TV. Of course, there's also Captain Jack Sparrow. He can shiver me timbers."

My kid was getting pale. It was time to pull back a bit.

I grimaced a little and hugged him. He immediately smiled and curled into me. Baseball Boy was just like a puppy.

"We should rent some prom inspired horror movies and I'll let you ravish me while we watch them. Of course, we can celebrate our deflowering with pizza. It will be fun."

I rubbed his head. He just made a weird purring noise. It was like taking candy from a baby.

Victory was mine.