Thanks guy I appreciate you all :)
Rachels POV
A lot has changed since I met Jesse, not in my heart but in my everyday life. He's a lot like me and he wants the same things that I want, to be famous no matter the cost. But no matter what I feel for him Finn still consumes my every thought. A few days ago he texted me, I was too afraid to open it so I still have it waiting there for me. I don't know what I expect it to say but I don't think that it's something I'm ready to read. In history class I bribed this guy to switch seats with me but I still know he's there and I can feel him every time he looks at me. When I'm with Jesse I do everything in my power to think only about him, and not about Finn or Finn and Santana and how they walk down the hall holding hands like nothing ever happened.
But Jesse makes me smile, he does everything to make sure I'm happy and that is how I deserve to be treated. I deserve to be someone's only choice, and kiss and hug the man I care about whenever I chose.
It was a few weeks after I'd met Jesse, he surprised me at school, it was quite romantic. He texted me and told me to meet him in choir room noting that he thinks I feel more at home there than anywhere else in Lima. He was right, that's where I go when I want to think or just be alone. When I got there he had set out a whole picnic of everything that I love, vegan of course. When I saw him I felt like I butterflies were in my stomach, we sat and talked for the whole hour of lunch and he decided to walk me to class. On my part it was the dumb mistake I'd ever made but with everything going so great I completely forgot that it meant Finn would see me and Jesse together. Either that or subconsciously I knew and wanted to pay him back for all the times I had to see him and Santana together. I would never confess to that by the way, anyways we arrived about the same time as Finn and I stopped in my tracks. His face with white and blank it looked like his soul had been ripped out of him, he stared walking towards us and my hear starting racing. Finn wouldn't hit him would he? I mean he doesn't have the right. I let him go and he should do the same for me.
"Hey man, you must be new..I'm finn!" he says holding his hand out to Jesse, what is he doing? Talk about awkward. "No I'm just here visiting my girlfriend, Rachel." He says shaking Finns hand. "Do you know her?" I honestly thought I was going to pass out my heart was going so fast, and my face was burning up. Finn looks at me and shakes his head, "No, I thought I did at one point, but I guess I never did." He turns and walks away. "Cool dude, a little cryptic..but cool." Jesse says and kisses me on the cheek and walks away. I stand at the door I feel like I can't move my legs like I'm cemented to the ground. What does he mean he doesn't know me? Finns knows me better than anyone. But whatever if that's how he's going to be act then I can't say or do anything about it. I finally put my chin up and walk into the class.
I don't look over at Finn but I could feel him staring at me, when I sit down I take a deep breath and decide that now is the time I'm finally ready Finns text. Nothing could hurt me anymore at this point so why not. When I open the text I tear starts to fall down my cheek I could feel it but at this point it was not stopping them.
"I don't want to live without you, and I don't care what I have to do but I'm going to make this right give me time to make things right. I realized that I care about Santana and I don't want to hurt her, but being with her and loving you is the worst kind of betrayal. It might take me a few days or weeks to get her to understand but she will, and you and I will be together Rachel Berry, because without you nothing in my life feels real. I hope you believe me, I hope you feel the same way. I love you more than words, Finn"
Damnit.