A/N: Originally submitted to IYFic for their Prompt Two's Company. Won first place.

Inuyasha couldn't understand what the big deal was. In his mind the whole picture was pretty clear: He had to find the shards of the shikon jewel as soon as he could; already he was slowed down by a pathetic girl who knew nothing about archery or the skills necessary for combat; the last thing he needed was to adopt a homeless brat, who essentially was a motormouth with sass to match but of no real use in battle.

His only fault was that he had shared his very valid concerns with Kagome, using maybe…just maybe, a little colourful language. That could have warranted a frown or perhaps a cross word or two – he was ready to grant that much. What it did not warrant were the string of 'osuwari's issuing on and on out of her filthy, slavering lips.

As Inuyasha pushed himself off the ground and dusted the earth and dry leaves clinging to him, he reconsidered his earlier thought. Her lips weren't exactly filthy and slavering – more of a nice shade of cherry and quite soft – he knew from the occasions when she had fallen asleep against him. They were nice, bow-shaped lips – further contemplation revealed – lips that he would very much like to kiss. A blush crept up his cheeks as he hastened to chase the new thought out of his mind. Life was hard enough as it was, without having to complicate things further. Besides, he'd had it with mortal women.

Lost as he was in his own reverie, he had hardly noticed when Shippou had sat down beside him.

"Wow, that Kagome could be scary!" the kitsune said with a shiver.

"Tell me about it," Inuyasha grumbled.

"I, for one, would think twice before ticking her off," he shook is head slowly.

"Keh! Pretty much everything I say ticks her off for some reason," the hanyou sulked.

"Well, you could use a shade more control when talking to her," Shippou opined thoughtfully.

'That does it.'

"Who the hell are you to lecture on how I should talk to Kagome?" Inuyasha yelled at the top of his lungs, "If you think I want any advice from a spoilt, shit-headed, measly, idio-"

"Why don't you like me, Inuyasha?" Shippou cut him off in the middle of his tirade.

The hanyou shut his mouth with a snap. Then opened it and shut it again.

"Wh-what an idiotic question," he finally managed to say, "have you ever looked at yourself?"

"I think it's got nothing to do with me," Shippou nodded his head sagely.

"Yeah, right!" Inuyasha replied sarcastically, dearly wishing to kick the kitsune up in the air. Only Kagome's ire prevented him from suiting action to the thought.

"I know what's going on around here," Shippou continued, unperturbed, "you have a thing with Kagome."

"What thing?" Inuyasha retorted.

"I don't know that, I'm just a kid. But that's what people say, when two people don't want a third to hang out with them. Two's company, three's a crowd, they say."

"Who?"

"People. Sheesh! You're even worse than I am! Anyway, that's what your problem is. You have a thing with Kagome and you want to hang out only with her and now I'm here so that's ticking you off."

Inuyasha snorted. "I hardly think that's the situation here."

"You know, you can use me to get closer to her," Shippou continued with a sly grin upon his face, "Kagome likes me quite a lot, so if you protect me and always dote on me and sacrifice your share of the food to fill my belly Kagome will see your sensitive side and like you all the more for it."

Inuyasha considered the option. If he was nice to Shippou – it was difficult but he could manage it, he supposed – then Kagome wouldn't be mad at him. That meant no more osuwari.

A voice of reason shattered his Utopia – 'There would always be reasons for her to get mad at you. The osuwari will continue as long as she's with you. And you won't have the satisfaction of being mean to the kitsune either.'

Reason ruled over passion.

"No, thank you," said Inuyasha as he gave vent to his frustration with a hearty kick to Shippou's backside.

"Kagomeeeeeeeeee!" he wailed as he sailed through the air.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome's shrieked echoed from within the makeshift hut they were staying in.

Inuyasha was prepared for what was to come. He was already lying on the ground.

"Totally worth it," he thought as a fresh round of osuwari revolved harmlessly around him.