Roy threw down his pen and leaned back in his chair. The paperwork's completed!
"Finally! Havoc, take it out of my sight!" He ordered, and Havoc made to stand up, but just at that moment, Riza walked in, clutching another stack of papers.
"Nonononononono!" Roy yelled, staring at the papers in horror. He didn't want to do another batch! That took him way too long! Two hours in fact! Riza looked at him, looking mildly startled (in actual fact, she was very startled, but she managed to keep her expression calm enough to only let a little of that show), then at the stack of finished paperwork on his desk.
"Well done sir. I'll take that paperwork to the proper destination." She offered, placing the other stack on Roy's desk and picking the finished stack up. Her hand briefly brushed Roy's hand as she did so, and, for some inexplicable reason, Roy suddenly felt calm and relaxed. A bit lightheaded, even. But then Riza stepped back, putting a new stack of papers on his desk. Roy looked a little confused for a moment, then, at the sight of the papers, he became his usual lax self again. Roy looked at the papers with distaste, and pushed it to the far side of his desk, as furthest away from him as possible. Riza gave a small smile.
"That's Edward Elric's report, sir. It would do you some good to look at it." She informed, and left the room again. Roy looked at the door in which she had exited for a moment.
"...W-well that was brief. Eh, I'll read Fullmetal's report." He mumbled. He was confused. Why had he felt that? It was a new feeling, really. How did she do that? Finally, he shrugged it off as something that would never be solved, and picked up a red pen with which he would mark the spelling and grammar errors. The boy was extremely smart, but often spelt things wrong.
"I had been taken through the portal of truth to the planet Earth, a planet where alchemy isn't practiced, and mechanics are highly developed instead. I struggled there for a while, wondering how to get back to Amestris with my ability to use alchemy obilerated." Roy muttered, then circled the word 'obilerated' and writing in the margin 'obliterated, Fullmetal... I thought you were smart?'. He grinned, then a yawn came over him, and that's when he looked up at his crew, to see that they were not working, but whispering to each other. They appeared absorbed in their conversation, so Roy decided to sneak up on them and see what they were talking about.
"She totally likes him." Fuery whispered.
"You're just saying that so that you'll win the bet." Havoc hissed.
"She does like him. Fuery's right." Breda insisted.
"You're just saying that so that you'll win the bet!" Falman said.
"You've all got to win for me to win." Breda informed.
"Why did you choose a bet like that? We'll all win money if you win!" Havoc said.
"I... Don't... Know..." Breda muttered.
"I'm going to win money for definite, at least." Fuery grinned.
"Hawkeye does not like me." Roy told them, and they jumped.
"Sir!"
"We, we didn't know you were there Colonel!"
"How did you sneak up on us?"
"I'm not part of this conversation!"
"Shut it!" He yelled, and they all shut up. "Lieutenant Hawkeye does not like me. She would never like me. After all, how could she like someone who doesn't do their paperwork unless forced to?" He reasoned, looking towards his window for no apparent reason. "Now stop soiling Lieutenant Hawkeye's name, or you'll do my paperwork for me!" He threatened, and they went back to their work. Roy tried to go back to his (no, really, he did), but he just couldn't. Finally, he stood up. It was a sunny day outside, casting a nice glow into the large room.
"I need some fresh air." Roy said abruptly, and exited his office. The corridor was deserted, so he leaned against the wall freely. Why are those four so adamant? It's annoying! Hawkeye cannot like me! We are polar opposites! But then he remembered that feeling he felt when Hawkeye had brushed his hand. What was that? Annoyed and exasperated, he walked down the corridor, only to see one Edward Elric, who was, by the looks of it, going to go to Roy's office. Roy decided to talk to him. First day back at the military, and I get to tease Fullmetal. Looks like things are finally looking up for me!
"Hello Fullmetal." Roy greeted pleasantly, and Edward's head abruptly turned towards him.
"Hello Colonel Idi- What happened to your EYE?" He exclaimed, staring at his eyepatch. Roy gingerly touched it.
"I was shot in the eye by Frank Archer after my fight with Bradley." He replied, in a matter-of-fact tone. Edward looked shocked.
"You weren't able to defend yourself?" He asked. Roy shook his head.
"Hardly. I had Selim in my arms and I had been stabbed in the shoulder, and I was losing blood fast." Edward shook his head.
"You idiot, Colonel Mustang. You could've died!" He yelled, fists clenched. Roy was a little taken aback. What's this? Fullmetal doesn't hate me with a passion? Roy shook his head this time.
"Lieutenant Hawkeye. I had complete faith in her. She knew I was with Bradley, and she was on scene when Archer attacked me. She was the one who shot him down. She saved me. I could never have died whilst she was on scene. One, because she's a brilliant sharpshooter. Two, I can't bring myself to die in front of her." Roy explained, smiling. Edward's fists relaxed as he looked at the colonel.
"Thanks." He said abruptly. Roy's eyebrows furrowed.
"For what?"
"For defeating Bradley." He said, and Roy patted his head.
"Anytime...shorty." He grinned as Edward's reluctant smile turned into a scowl. He lunged at Roy angrily.
"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT HE CAN FIT IN A BABY'S FIST AND NOT GET CRUSHED BECAUSE THE FIST CAN'T CLOSE THAT TIGHT?!" He yelled heatedly, and Roy deflected his blow with a strong block.
"You're not the only one who knows martial arts, Fullmetal!" Roy informed, as Edward dived in for another attack. The two continued like this for some time, until Roy got bored and snapped his fingers, turning Edward's martial arts stick into a pile of burnt ash.
"Clean that up Fullmetal."
"WHAT? I didn't make the mess, you did!" Edward objected, pointing an accusing finger at Roy.
"You started the fight." Roy said.
"You burned it."
"You created the stick."
"You made me."
"That's an order Fullmetal." Ed jutted his chin.
"What if I don't want to obey it?"
"Then you'll be given more work to do." Roy retorted. Edward shot him a dirty look, then proceeded to create a dustpan and brush, and tidy up the ashes, muttering profanities as he did so. Roy tutted.
"Language, Fullmetal. When I was your age I didn't curse at all." Roy scolded, mocking him.
"You might not have cursed, but you were probably a womanizer even back then." Edward retorted, but Roy, amazingly, shook his head.
"No, I didn't have a date everyday like now. But I still had girls fighting over me. There was this one time in grade 6 where I got asked out by ten girls in the first week of school... I declined every one of them, of course. But who could resist my charms? The sexiest guy in school was a sixth-grader! With my sleek black hair, dark and mysterious on the outside, but can pull off a sarcastic comment when needed, dressed in smart waistcoats... You get the idea. " Roy reminisced, smirking superiorly.
"Yeah. I get the idea that your a morally bankrupt colonel with a god complex. But I would've thought you'd have dated all ten." Edward said, snickering.
"My grades would've been shot then."
"How so?"
"Well, when your teachers make you sit boy-girl, and ten out of fifteen girls are your girlfriends... I wouldn't have gotten time to do my work. Seriously, they were all hopeless lovesick girls... Then again, I struggled to get my work done even then. They just wouldn't stop asking me out..." Roy explained, with a hint of a smirk on his face.
"Why have you turned into a womanizer now then?" Edward asked, shifting the dustpan and brush to the side. Roy stared at him for a moment, then shrugged.
"I honestly don't have any idea. I started when I became Colonel. I acquired my team... Then I started going out with women left right and centre." Roy said.
"To be honest, I like sixth-grader Roy better. Reminds me of me, actually." Edward said.
"Apart from the fact that you don't have millions of girls liking you. And that you're not as good looking as me." Roy smirked.
"I am too!" Edward insisted. Roy laughed, then pretended to look all around for something.
"Hmm... You don't have a girlfriend though. I, on the other hand..." Roy gave a short laugh.
"Shut up. I don't want one." Edward claimed.
"Fair enough. I suppose you'd be hard pressed to find one who's shorter than you though!" Roy mocked, and Edward went into a tangent again, but it was short lived, as at that moment, Riza Hawkeye came down the corridor, thankfully, this time, with no papers in her arms.
"Colonel, Edward, what are you doing out here?" She asked curiously. Roy and Edward both smoothed their clothes out hastily.
"I was on my way to Colonel Mustang's office to hand my last two pages in. I lost them for a while!" Edward replied. Roy, in the meanwhile, was simply staring at Riza. Then, before she turned to look at him, he shook himself to clear his head. However, Edward was looking at him a little curiously.
"I needed fresh air." He said simply. Riza nodded.
"Have you finished reviewing Edward's report?" Riza asked. Roy looked into Riza's dark brown eyes, and grinned sheepishly.
"I couldn't concentrate." He explained, truthfully enough. His crew was being too annoying.
"Sir, you know as well as I know that you need to finish reviewing Edward's report. With all due respects, Colonel, I suggest that you go into your office and do your work. I assume you have had enough fresh air? As for you, Edward, I'll take those last two papers." Riza said, holding out her hand. Edward placed the papers in her hand, and she took them and walked towards Roy's office. Roy made no attempt to move. Instead, his eyes were fixed on the back of his subordinate. Her walk was rigid and composed, yet held something that could only be elegant beauty.
"Are you coming, Colonel?" She asked, turning her head to look at him. Her sharp eyes were fixed upon him, carefully observing him.
"Are you feeling alright, Colonel?" She enquired, and Roy, snapping back to reality, nodded his head. What was that all about? I hate this. I really do. All this confusion in my mind whenever I meet Lieutenant Hawkeye. It's insane. I don't like her. If I did, I wouldn't go on dates with other girls.
"I told you Hawkeye- I need fresh air." Roy reminded. Riza's eyes softened slightly. Just ever so slightly. But they still softened.
"Only fifteen minutes more, Colonel." Riza said, smiling, and went into the office by herself. Roy turned back to Edward, who was staring at him with an evil grin on his face.
"What's with that evil grin, Fullmetal?" Roy asked, puzzled, but smirking himself.
"It's you." He replied vaguely.
"What about me? The fact that I'm so dazzlingly handsome that even you have fallen for me?" Roy teased, flicking his head so that his hair fell over his eyes in the way only he could do.
"HELL WOULD FREEZE OVER BEFORE THAT HAPPENED, COLONEL IDIOT! No, it's just that I now have a new way to tease you." He replied angrily.
"Oh yeah, and what's that?"
"Mustang and Hawkeye sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g! First comes love, then co-AARGH!" Edward sang, but was interrupted by a flame burning away the sleeves of his robe. He angrily glared at a livid Colonel Mustang.
"Don't ever utter those words again, Fullmetal. Especially never in front of Hawkeye." He ordered threateningly.
"But it's so obvious that you like each other!" Edward said, exasperated.
"How so?" Roy asked, calm again, but still bearing a dangerous tone in his voice.
"For starters, you couldn't keep your eyes off her! And when she asked you a question, you were weirdly absentminded!" Edward informed.
"I needed fresh air! My head wasn't feeling right!" He growled.
"That doesn't explain it! You seemed perfectly fine when you confronted me! And, Lieutenant Hawkeye's eyes were kinder when she spoke to you! Lieutenant Hawkeye doesn't do kind!" Edward yelled.
"Why do you care?" Roy asked. Edward hesitated, then spoke.
"Because. You and the lieutenant have suffered too much. You had your frikkin' eye taken out! Hawkeye has had her life cut out, trying to protect you! She never gets a moment's rest, constantly worrying about you! It's not fair! So you two will goddamn get together, or so help me, I'll kill you! The least you guys deserve is a life together! You've suffered so much together. Now don't you dare mention this conversation to anyone except Al and Lieutenant Hawkeye. I hate being nice to you." Edward explained, his voice lower, but still heated. Roy stared at him for a moment then smiled. A genuine smile.
"Thank you, Edward. But I still won't accept it. Even if I did, we wouldn't be able to get together. The military has anti-fraternisation laws." Roy explained. Edward looked up, and gold met black.
"Well then, become Führer. You'll be able to change the laws." Edward responded curtly, then turned his back.
"And, another reason why this topic affects me. Winry and Al won't get together. They both like each other. I can tell. But apparently, Brother likes Winry." Edward admitted bitterly.
"And do you?" Roy asked.
"No." Edward replied simply, then walked away. Roy smiled, then turned his back. Do I really like Lieutenant Hawkeye? Then he walked back into his office, and sat in his chair. Riza looked at him beside her.
"Sir, is your head cleared now?" She asked, and Roy looked up at her calm features. He smiled.
"Yes."
A/N- Well, I listened to you guys! This is a record for me, by the way. Two updates in less than a week! I think I've earned some more reviews, don't you? And, as an extra incentive to review, I've got a link to an epic Royai youtube video, created by OuranFowl! Here it is, folks:
/watch?v=ogaIRxUHDRk
Stick in front of it. It won't let me put it. Review for my generosity?
Anyway, thanks to Serpents Cross and artemis road for reviewing! I thank you most graciously!
I'm sorry for the OOC Ed... I just wanted to make him 'nice', for some reason. And I like WinryxAl, so that'll become a side story (I think).
I loved making Ed and Roy talk, I find their 'friendship' that's based on hate to be most amusing! Especially when Roy says (in the anime) 'It hurts, I'm gonna pee my pants! So tough.' It's so funny, just the way he says it!
And, constructive criticism is approved, but no flames, please! Unless they're flames from Roy. Then I don't mind!
Oh, and I thank Serpents Cross for answering my question!
Now, here's a fun little fact:
The name 'Roy' is Old French for 'King'.