Chapter 10

Eddie let go of Mara's hand, fighting the urge to continue crying. Mara had always been warm and alive that he felt as though she immediately turned cold when she stopped breathing. Her light tan had suddenly disappeared as well, as though the pigment on her skin drained along with the blood. Alice and the other nurses were still desperately trying to pull the twins out, and paid him no attention.

He remembered the first and only birthing casualty he witnessed. The father—he couldn't remember the man's name—did not stand beside his wife, but filmed the actions of Eddie and other nurses assisting Dr. Clyde as he pulled the baby out. And then the wife—some anti-drug woman who refused an epidural—began screaming louder and more frantic than she originally was. Eddie couldn't remember what had gone wrong, but once the blood began pouring out not as bad as it did with Mara, Eddie's first instinct was to lead the man out, but the man had already ran out in fear, thinking the doctors would solve it if they were alone and they could concentrate. The woman died, but the child lived, and Eddie wondered if the man hated himself for choosing to run moments before his wife died.

Eddie did not choose to run, and watched his wife die in front of him. He wondered if he would have felt better if he had ran like the patient's husband too, but told himself that he would just feel worse and Mara would never have said goodbye. The two nurses didn't even ask him to leave. He felt like screaming at them for breaking protocol, but he knew he'd refuse to be kicked out had they tried.

He leaned and kissed his wife's corpse for the last time before closing her eyelids shut. He hated to think of the fact that he would have to tell his dear in-laws the news.

"Eddie…" Alice finally looked up and looked at him with grief. "I'm so, so sorry…"

Eddie fought back the tears. I'm not a husband anymore, but I am a father. I need to be strong for my little boys. He would never forget Mara but she would have wanted him to be strong for their sons. They were his reason for living now, and he needed to be ready to welcome them. "W-where are…where are my sons?"

Instead of reaching for either of the two bundles, Alice just stood there, looking at him sadly. "Eddie…I'm sorry."

The nurses were looking at him guiltily now, standing up. The two wrapped babies were still on the table, and then Eddie wondered why the nurses weren't carrying either. For a second, he felt annoyed—he had personally asked the best pediatrician in the hospital to take care of Mara, but he ended up with the most incompetent new nurses the hospital hired. Why weren't they supporting the twins' heads and carrying it? Shouldn't they be cleaning the blood? When he had dealt with Mara's funeral and went back to work, he would make sure the hospital knew about these nurses, who acted as though his twins were…

For a second, his whole world stopped.

"No…they're not…" Eddie said quietly, the tears fighting its back. "No. They're supposed to be crying or something...not unless they're…" He couldn't even finish it, not daring to say the last word in case it came true.

Alice did it for him. "Stillborn."