For those of you just starting in this chapter…beginningconversation between Ryo-Sensei (my own character) and Hatori.

"Now, how could you have received e-coli poisoning?"

Doki…doki…doki…my heart is beating harder and faster than it ever has before in my life. "B…but you told Shigure I have the flu!"

"I didn't want to worry him. He obviously cares enough about you that such information would have the potential to make him gravely ill—to put him into shock. Now the question is, how did you cut your arms?"

"…"

"Hatori-Sensei, I need to know! It is dire that you receive the correct treatment as soon as possible or you could die! Do you really want that?"

I think for a moment. I had wanted to die, I didn't think I had anything to live for. But now? I had promised Shigure that I would hold on…for him. "No." Admitting it is so hard. Simply living will take all the tenacity I have.

"Good. So I need to know—how did you cut your arms? You didn't even tell the truth to Shigure-San, did you? I need to know the truth."

"I told him…I told him part of the truth. I told him I cut myself with a razor."

"…and?"

"And I had been holding on to an old rusty razor blade for such a purpose."

"When did you start feeling this way?"

"What way?"

"Hopeless."

When did I start feeling hopeless? I think I've always felt that way. Such is the fate of the Sohma. For a short while, I thought I could escape, with Kana, but after facing Akito about her… "Since I was born."

"And how many times have you tried to commit suicide?"

"I don't think I ever truly tried before…I felt I should live with the punishment that was life."

"So…why do you want to live now?" His face is questioning, of course, but yet it is also…wise. He seems so…composed. How does he understand so well?

"I…I have Shigure now…" What am I thinking? I can't burden Shigure! If he and I maintain a serious relationship, it will end in Hell for both of us! Akito will never allow it! "D…don't worry about it."

"Don't worry about what?" Ryo-Sensei asks in surprise.

"The treatment." I answer. "I would love it if Shigure and I could live happily together, but our family head will do everything in his power to prevent that."

"You may not believe me when I say this," Ryo-Sensei begins, "but I know how you feel."

"Sure…." I answer.

"I'm serious." He continues, "My full name is Takayashi Ryo. I was in love with a girl once and we went to my family head to request to be married. However…"

I lean in as much as I am able, listening intently. "However…?"

"He wouldn't hear of it. I found out that for quite some time the family head had been madly in love with me. Late one night…he followed me into my bedroom…and tried to rape me. After that, I cut myself, I starved myself, I even tried to commit suicide."

I am astounded. I could never imagine any family outside of the Sohma going through so much pain. How selfish have I been? "So…then…?"

"How am I here to talk to you today?" he asks, finishing my question. "Remember the girl I told you about? She stuck in to the estate one night and we ran away together. Together, we found medical treatment. I started feeling like I could cope with life again. Eventually, I studied medicine myself and became a doctor."

"But…what happened to the girl?" I ask. I have noticed that he wears no wedding ring and it seems to me that if they had wanted to get married and were able to run away together…that they would do so.

Ryo-Sensei's face is stone cold. "Your IV is almost finished and I'll have to give you some injections to combat the poisoning. I can hear some footsteps approaching so end of discussion for today, all right?"

"Oh…okay…"

Shigure and Ayame soon walk in. "Ha-San!" Ayame fawns, "I was so worried! You have no idea! I had to go and tend to the shop of course and I was simply out of sorts. I attempted to make an extra-special outfit too, you would adore it Ha-San, but it was only turning out well, when I wanted it marvelous! I spoke with Mine and I decided that I simply must come comfort you, I couldn't stand it any longer!"

"Has he been like this the whole time you were "comforting" him, Shigure?" I ask. "Pretty much," he replies, giving me a quick peck on the cheek. "Sorry we took so long. Has everything been okay?"

"Just wonderful," Ryo-Sensei replies with a smile. He is wearing his gloves and has alcohol and clothes to remove my IV. "I'm going to take out the IV and administer some injections now though, so you might want to calm that shopkeeper down."

"Oh Ha-San!" Ayame swoons, "Injections…plural…as in MORE THAN ONE! Oh my poor thing, as soon as you are out of here I shall prepare some tea for you and we will have a wonderful siesta together!"

Ryo-Sensei takes out my IV…both Shigure and Ayame are appalled by the blood. He then gives me three injections. "These are going to make you pretty woozy. I'll turn the lights down and let you sleep it off okay? I'll be checking in whenever I can, probably every 45 minutes, at least while you're in what I call the "danger zone"." He motions to Shigure, "See this button by his bed? If anything happens, give it a push and I'll come running." Shigure nods.

Fifteen minutes after Ryo-Sensei leaves, I begin to feel the full effect of the drugs. I have been drunk very few times in my life, but I know well enough that that is the effect the drugs are having on me. "Hey, Shigure!" I yell in a high pitched voice.

"Hatori? What is it?" he asks in surprise. Ayame is asleep in the guest chair, the emotional day has overpowered him.

"I like you…I like you Shigure." I reply with a big smile.

Shigure chuckles, "I like you too."

"You know what would make be happy?" I ask him.

"What?"

"If you gave me a bi-i-i-i-g kiss "

"Oh really?" He walks over to me and presses his lips against mine. I feel his tongue against my mouth and I slowly open my mouth partway to let it in. Our tongues touch. We stay still like that for a few blissful moments, and then part.

"You know what Shii-Chan?" I ask.

"What?" he asks, seeming both surprised and delighted that I called him Shii-Chan.

I give him a big dopey smile. "When I'm with you, I feel happy. It doesn't hurt so much inside. You know, I always had this pain right here in my chest and I felt it all the time, even with Kana. I've been searching and searching for a medical explanation and I can't find one, but when I'm with you it goes away. I don't understand it, do you?"

"N…no, I don't. Hatori, I think you should get some sleep now, okay?"

"Not quite yet," Ryo-Sensei counters, walking into the door.

"I didn't hear any footsteps…" Shigure tells him, his eyes slanted.

Ryo-Sensei just winks. "I have to check on the patient before I let him fall asleep. How are you feeling, Hatori-Sensei?"

"I feel really good." I tell him with a smile, "in fact I was just telling Shigure about how that awful pain in my chest is gone. You don't understand that, do you?"

Ryo-Sensei looks strangely serious, "Oh, I do."

I give him a quizzical look. "You'll understand…in time," he reassures me. "Don't try too hard when the medicines are playing with your brain." He smiles.

"Now that you mention it, I do feel a little…light…headed." I yawn.

"Well, your blood pressure and oxygen levels are all right, so I'll let you sleep."

"All right." I'm out like a light. In a few minutes I hear the door close and feel someone get into bed with me. I suppose my body reflects my surprise because Shigure whispers, "don't worry, Hatori. It's just me; I'm here to protect you." With that, I slowly drift back into sleep as his arms fold around me.

Notes:

Senseidoctor

Akito is female but referred to as male, as in keeping with the manga.

Dokisound of a heartbeat.
Name order: Family Name, Given Name. Example Sohma Hatori.

Shii-Chanpet name for Shigure, the type of nickname a high school girl would give herself