Chapter 14
"Bobby!" Sarah exclaimed, running into his hospital room and flinging her arms around him.
"Hey there girlie." He said returning her hug.
Just then the doctor walked in to go over Bobby's results. The doctor looked at the three visitors and tried to politely ask them to leave but Bobby spoke up and said a simple, "They're staying."
The doctor then said a lot of things that didn't make sense to any of them so Bobby said, "What are you trying to say?"
"I'm sorry, Mr. Singer, but you are unlikely to walk again."
"Unlikely to walk again?! Why, you snot-nosed son of a bitch! Wait till I get out of this bed!" Bobby yelled at the doctor causing him to flee the room. "I'll use my game leg and kick your friggin' ass! Yeah, you better run!" He looked over at Dean and Sam, "You believe that yahoo?"
"Screw him. You'll be fine." Dean said as Sarah moved forward and grabbed Bobby's hand.
"So, let me ask the million dollar question. What do we do now?" Sam asked.
"Well… we save as many as we can for as long as we can, I guess. It's bad. Whoever wins, heaven or hell, we're boned." Bobby said.
"What if we win?" Dean asked. Bobby and Sarah stared at him. Sam turned to face Dean. "I'm serious. I mean, screw the angels and the demons and their crap apocalypse. Hell, they want to fight a war, they can find their own planet. This one's ours, and I say they get the hell off it. We take 'em all on. We kill the devil. Hell, we even kill Michael if we have to. But we do it our own damn selves."
"And how are we supposed to do all this, genius?" Bobby remarked.
"I got no idea. But what I do have is a GED and a give 'em hell attitude, and I'll figure it out."
"You are nine kinds of crazy, boy." Bobby said.
"You got that right." Sarah added looked at Dean curiously.
Dean looked over at Sarah quickly then said to Bobby, "It's been said." Then patted Bobby's shoulder. "Listen, you stay on the mend, we'll see you in a bit." Then he headed to the door, followed by Sam.
"Sam?" Bobby said. Sam stopped and looked back at Bobby.
"I was awake. I know what I said back there. I just want you to know that… that was the demon talking. I ain't cutting you out, boy. Not ever." Bobby confessed. Sam paused in shock. Sarah's eyes filled with tears as she held Bobby's hand a little tighter, then she noticed the look in Dean's eyes. He looked almost pissed.
Sam sighed in relief, "Thanks, Bobby."
"You're welcome. I deserve a damn medal for this, but… you're welcome."
Dean and Sam walked out of the room. Sarah bent and kissed Bobby's forehead, saying, "Try not to kill anybody tonight."
"Spoil sport." Bobby mumbled as she left to catch up with the boys.
Sarah made it outside just a couple of moments after the boys and saw them talking.
"I just said a bunch of crap for Bobby and Sarah's benefit." Dean yelled. Sarah quickly hid behind some bushes. "I mean, I'll fight. I'll fight till the last man, but let's at least be honest. I mean, we don't stand a snowball's chance, and you know that. I mean, hell, you of all people know that."
"Dean…" Sam said causing Dean to stop and look at him. "Is there something you want to say to me?"
Dean paused then said, "I tried, Sammy. I mean, I really tried. But I just can't keep pretending that everything's alright. Because it's not. And it's never going to be. You choose a demon over your own brother…" Sam rolled his eyes, "and look what happened."
"I would give anything- anything- to take it all back." Sam said.
"I know you would. And I know how sorry you are. I do. But, man… you were the one that I depended on the most. And you let me down in ways that I can't even… I'm just… I'm having a hard time forgiving and forgetting here. You know?"
"What can I do?" Sam asked.
"Honestly? Nothing."
Sam nodded a little, looking down, not surprised.
"I just don't… I don't think we can ever be what we were. You know?" Dean said. Sam nodded again, still not surprised. "I just don't think I can trust you."
Sarah wiped her eyes and slunk back over to the door of the hospital. Then walked over to the impala like she'd just gotten outside. She joined the boys silently and they traveled to a new motel for the night.
Sarah got up the next morning, her muscles sore from the cot. She quietly got up and walked into the bathroom for a shower, trying not to wake either boy. After getting cleaned up, she started to work on her laptop. A while later, Sam got up and showered then joined her at the table. When she saw Dean get up and go in the bathroom, she said to Sam, "Hey, why don't you go get us some coffee and breakfast?"
Sam looked up at her with a slightly confused look then said, "Why?"
"Because… I'm hungry… and…"
"You want to be alone with Dean, don't you?" Sam asked catching on and giving her a 'really' look.
"Not like that, you dork!" Sarah said sarcastically. "No, I just want to have a talk with him."
"You know, now's not really the best time to talk with him." Sam said.
"Hey, it's now or never. I have to get some things clear between us. So will you go? Please?"
Sam sighed then nodded, "Alright, but you better put a sock on the door if stuff happens. I don't need that sight in my head." Then he grabbed his coat and left.
A few minutes later, Dean walked out of the bathroom and looked around. "Where's Sam?" he asked not in a good mood.
"He's getting us coffee and breakfast." Sarah answered trying not to stare at his shirtless chest.
"Hmm… yeah I bet…" he mumbled as he looked in his bag for a shirt.
"Hey. None of that. I asked him to go." Sarah said defensively.
"And why'd you do that?" he asked sounding annoyed, while pulling out his phone.
Sarah got up from the table, walked over to him and snatched his phone from his hand, earning a nasty look from Dean. "Because, we need to talk." She said emphasizing the 'we'.
Dean sighed heavily, "Sarah, I am not in the mood for one of our chats. Can we just talk later?" He asked moving to take his phone back.
Sarah quickly moved out of his way and stashed his phone in her bra. "Nope. We need to talk. I have to tell you something. Now sit!"
"I'll go in there and get that. Don't think I won't."
"Just give me a few minutes. Please…" Sarah begged.
He sighed and sat down on the edge of his bed and Sarah preceded to tell him about her reason to rejoin them after the Sandover incident. Her continued mental torture from the angels and eventual physical torture.
"Well, that's it." She said, "The moral of the story is that they will go to any lengths to get us to do 'our destinies'. And for me that's being your companion and giving birth to your kids after the battle."
Dean sat there thinking over all that she had said, "So what now?"
"Well, I think we have to try and stay away from the angel's plan for us."
"Does that mean you're leaving?"
"No. I will continue this fight with you and Sam. We have better strength when we're together. But…"
"But what?" Dean asked sharply.
"But… we have to decide here and now about us… about what type of relationship we are going to have." She said trying to find the right words. "Are we going to continue on our destined path and be intimately involved or are we going to sever those feelings and continue on just as friends?"
"And you can do that? Just work beside me and not want more?" Dean asked looking her in the eyes.
Sarah stared into his eyes a moment before looking away and saying, "It's not easy. It's never been easy, but I've done it before, I can do it again." She said looking back up at him, "With some ground rule, of course."
Dean rolled his eyes, "What rules?"
"Oh you know, just no kissing, hugging, sex, holding hands. As little physical contact as possible."
Dean thought for a moment, "And this is what you want?"
"I want what's best for both of us in this fight."
"And you know what's best?" Dean snapped. "You always know what's best for me don't you? That's why you always leave, because that's what's best!"
"Dean…"
"It's time to go check on Bobby. Give me my phone." Dean said changing the subject.
Sarah stared at him a moment before sighing and giving back his phone. "I guess that's it then." She muttered, watching him walk away.
Once at the hospital, Dean disappeared and left Sarah and Sam to go see Bobby. Bobby just sat and stared out the window not wanting to talk to anyone. Sarah leaned against the wall just inside the room while Sam leaned in the doorway.
Dean walked up a while later holding a manila folder. "We got to cheer him up. Maybe I'll give him a back rub." Dean joked.
"Dean." Sam cautioned.
"Well, what then?" Dean asked.
"Look… we might have to wrap our heads around the idea that Bobby might not just bounce back this time." Sam said then noticed the folder Dean was holding, "What's in the envelope?"
Sarah turned to look at them, acknowledging for the first time that Dean was there.
"Went to Radiology." Dean said pulling out some x-rays. "Got some glamour shots." He then held up a chest x-ray that was covered in strange markings. "Let's just say the doctors are baffled."
Sam started to examine the writing then breathed, "Holy crap."
"Yeah, well, Cas carved you both one too."
Sam's phone started to ring. He went to answer it as Sarah took the x-ray to examine.
"Hello?... Cas?" Sam asked into the phone.
"Speak of the devil." Dean mumbled.
"Ah, St. Martin's Hospital. Why? What are you… Cas?" Sam asked then hung up when it was obvious that Cas was no longer there.
A moment later, Cas walked up and joined them.
"Cell phone, Cas? Really? Since when do angels need to reach out and touch someone?" Dean quipped.
"You're hidden from angels now- all angels. I won't be able to simply…" Cas explained before Bobby cut him off.
"Enough foreplay." Bobby said gruffly, causing everyone in the room to look over at him, "Get over here and lay your damn hands on." Then added when nobody moved, "Get healing. Now."
"I can't." Cas said bluntly.
Bobby turned his chair to face Cas, "Say again?"
Cas walked over to Bobby. "I'm cut off from heaven and much of heaven's power. Certain things I can do. Certain things I can't."
"You're telling me you lost your mojo just in time to get me stuck in this trap the rest of my life?"
"I'm sorry."
"Shove it up your ass." Bobby replied then turned back to look out the window.
"At least he's talking now." Dean said trying to make a joke.
"I heard that." Bobby said grumpily. Sarah smacked the back of Dean's head.
Dean scowled at her and mumbled to her, "No touching, remember?"
Cas walked over to them and said, "I don't have much time. We need to talk."
"Okay." Dean said turning his attention to Cas.
"Your plan to kill Lucifer." Cas stated.
"Yeah. You want to help?" Dean asked.
"No. It's foolish. It can't be done."
"Oh. Thanks for the support." Dean said sarcastically.
"But I believe I have the solution. There is someone besides Michael strong enough to take on Lucifer. Strong enough to stop the apocalypse." Cas said.
"Who's that?" Sam asked.
"The one who resurrected me and put you on that airplane. The one who began everything. God." Everyone looked at Cas skeptically, so Cas added, "I'm gonna find God."
Dean quickly shut the door before asking, "God?"
"Yes." Cas stated.
"God." Dean said again.
"Yes! He isn't in heaven. He has to be somewhere."
"Try New Mexico. I hear he's on a tortilla." Dean quipped.
"No, he's not on any flatbread."
"Listen, Chuckles, even if there is a God, he is either dead—and that's the generous theory" Dean said getting angry.
"He is out there, Dean." Cas snapped.
"I mean, look around you, man. The world is in the toilet. We are literally—at the end of days here, and he's off somewhere drinking booze out of a coconut. All right?"
"Enough." Cas snapped at Dean. "This is not a theological issue. It's strategic. With God's help, we can win."
"It's a pipe dream, Cas." Dean sighed.
Castiel advanced on Dean, causing Sarah to move closer protectively. "I killed two angels this week. My brothers. I'm hunted. I rebelled. And I did it, all of it, for you, and you failed. You and your brother destroyed the world and I lost everything, for nothing. So keep your opinions to yourself."
"You didn't drop in just to tear us a new hole. What is it you want?" Bobby asked.
"I did come for something. An amulet." Cas admitted.
"An amulet? What kind?" Bobby asked.
"Very rare. Very powerful. It burns hot in God's presence. It'll help me find him."
"A God EMF?" Sam asked.
CAS nodded.
"Well, I don't know what you're talking about. I got nothing like that." Bobby said.
"I know. You don't." Cas said then looked at Dean then dropped his gaze to Dean's necklace.
"What, this?" Dean asked.
"May I borrow it?" Cas asked.
"No." Dean said quickly.
"Dean. Give it to me." Cas said seriously.
Dean sighed and took off the amulet, then said, "All right, I guess…" he then held it out to Cas then pulled it back and added, "Don't lose it." Castiel grabbed it. "Great. Now I feel naked."
"I'll be in touch." Cas said before disappearing.
"When you find God, tell him to send legs!" Bobby yelled.
After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, Sarah said, "Well, I need some coffee. I'll be back." Then she walked to the door.
"Make mine Irish!" Bobby yelled after her.
Sarah made her way down to the cafeteria and picked up four coffees. She was only gone about 10 minutes. When she returned to Bobby's room she saw Sam and Dean walking quickly down the hall in the other direction.
"Where'd those two run off too?" She asked once back in Bobby's room.
"Rufus just called. He's under attack." Bobby said.
"Oh my! I'll see you later Bobby!" She said kissing his forehead and running out the door. 'I wonder why those two haven't called me yet.' She thought.
She caught up to them at the impala. "You two ready to go?" She asked causing Dean to turn toward her as he neared the driver side door.
"Geez you're fast." Dean muttered.
"What were you planning on leaving before I could catch up?" she said jokingly then noticed his awkward look. "You were going to just leave me? … Seriously?" Dean looked over at Sam for help. "No, Dean, don't look to Sam for help. This has you written all over it."
Sam gave Dean a 'you're on your own' look and got in the impala.
"Look, Sarah…"
"Know what? Save it. It is very clear how your taking our earlier chat, but even you have to realize how much of a dick move this was." She said, her eyes burning with hurt and anger. "Well, one dick move deserves another." She then grabbed his jacket and pulled him close before kissing him with everything she had. She ran her hands all over his upper body. When she slipped them under his shirt, he let out a low moan. That's when she pushed him away. He gave her a bewildered look, very confused about what was going on. Sarah then opened the door to the backseat, grabbed her bag of travel supplies and turned to walk away.
Dean snapped out of his daze and asked angrily, "What the hell was that?"
Sarah turned around and said, "That was the last kiss you'll ever get from me." She then continued to walk away.
Dean grabbed her arm and asked, "But… why… wh... How was that a dick move?"
Sarah looked at him and removed his hand from her arm then said, "Because, Dean, I want you to realize that this is what you chose. It wasn't me this time, it was you. I want you to remember how much of a coward you were and how you couldn't just tell me your decision." She turned and walked away but added over her shoulder. "Don't call me, unless it's an emergency." Then she headed back into the hospital and back up to Bobby's room.
"What are you doing back?" Bobby asked.
"I thought it would be better to hang around here with you." She said giving him a small smile.
"Hmph…" Bobby mumbled, "Well, who said I wanted ya?"
"Oh can it you old fart. You're stuck with me until I get you home." She said sitting in the chair and staring out the window. A minute later, her phone buzzed. Looking down she saw a text from Sam saying, 'sorry'. She closed her phone and continued to stare out the window.