Heroes of the Past and Present

Disclaimer: Do not own Victorious, do not own the video game

A/N: It has a mention in this chapter, no lyrics mentioned or anything, but a song I want you guys to listen to. Antes de las Seis by Shakira. A softer song in which the meaning can be interpreted as such: The woman is telling her lover that she is leaving herself open, vulnerable, that he knows every part of her and has the power to hurt her if he so wills it. She is saying that she is trusting her lover with her heart, her soul, trusting him not to tear her apart. For this story, that song is one of many songs for Trina from Shakira that hold significant meaning and impact. Further ado, here is the chapter.

Chapter 31 (Baring the Soul)

"Shut up? As if it's that easy…" Trina fought against herself as she walked with her weary and lethargic sister through the darkened streets of Darktown. She was letting her legs do the moving as her heart lead the way, just as her ancestor advised. "Varric talks about how the dwarves believe ancestors are something to be revered, that people are to honor and respect their ancestors. Even in our time, there are religions and groups of people that believe that still…He must be enjoying himself with all of us." She looked towards Tori, smiling slightly as her sister made eye contact.

"Is there a reason we have to do this in the middle of the night, Trina?"

"Yes." She couldn't help what her heart wanted, she understood that now, and she wanted to tell Sinjin before anything else got in the way. She wanted to talk to him before her own brain was able to start preventing her, before her insecurities ran away with her. "I have this sudden strength, this confidence…and I need to talk to Sinjin. Now."

"Funny, why didn't you find this strength tomorrow morning?" Tori yawned loudly. To the right, a Carta gang member was running towards them, blade raised. Without missing a beat, Tori created a wall of fire in front of the man so he could not come after them. "Instead, we travel at night when we're not only tired and cranky, but bad guys are out."

"What? It's just like LA, right?" Trina laughed nervously, remembering all the times she would leave the house in the middle of the night to go meet up with Sinjin or Lindsay, much against her father's wishes. Criminals often ran rampant in the streets, but she made sure to stay safe and portray an air of confidence that would keep criminals from coming after her. "So no different, really. It's just urgent…it can't wait, I don't want to wait until I can't bring all this up."

"Did you call him?"

"Did I…um…" She did not call Sinjin, she didn't often use her phone around here anyway. Plus, she rarely called him when he was at the clinic. Other people were usually there as well. "No."

"Lovely…" Tori picked up the pace and walked in stride with Trina, slowly shaking her head. "I can't stand all this fighting. Killing and everything is just…I don't like it. None of us do, but it's necessary."

"I know, but worry when it does become easy. It just means you're human." It was never easy to kill another living human being, but even the darkspawn was difficult, though they were demons. "It's nice to know my little sister is still human, right?" She smirked and Tori rolled her eyes.

"Ha-ha, very funny."

"You know I love you, Tori."

"I love you too, sis. Always have." Tori smiled warmly and Trina absorbed the words, letting them build her up. Upon reaching Anders's clinic, Trina began to knock on the door. After a minute, it slowly opened and Anders gazed out with a surprised, yet exhausted look.

"What are you doing here? No offense…what's the problem?"

"Um…would you believe heart issues?" Anders raised an eyebrow, then opened the door fully and motioned to a cot in the back.

"Sinjin's sleeping, but I guess you can wake him, surely he won't mind."

"He won't, I know him. I wake him up at times like three in the morning all the time." Tori raised an eyebrow and Trina rushed in side. With each step she took towards Sinjin, a growing fear rose up inside of her, telling her to simply give it up. The idea of loving someone would never happen for her. She closed her eyes and shook her head, tearing the thoughts away. "Shut up, shut up, shut up, I deserve this. I deserve to be happy…for once in my life…"

With that fueling her, she slowly lowered herself to Sinjin's cot and quietly moved onto it, curling herself beside him. She buried her face against his chest and brought her knees up between the two of them. Sinjin opened his eyes and stared into hers for a second before realizing she was there. "Trina? What…"

"I wanted to talk to you before I talked myself out of it. I need to tell you something, and it's very important." She looked to the makeshift bed, now realizing what she was laying on. It was a rock with a sheet thrown over it as well as a pillow stuffed with feathers. Not quite as comfortable as an actual bed, but not bad at all. Sinjin's smile filled her with warmth and confidence, of course she was amazed he'd be smiling at all when she woke him from sleep.

"Are you okay?"

"I love you." She just wanted to get it out before she stopped herself once more. Her emotions were clawing at her inside, like a demon ravishing her very soul. She took a deep breath and looked into Sinjin's calm, passionate gaze. Either it was his lack of sleep, or his understanding of her feelings, but he wasn't reacting with surprise. Instead, she gained a sense of love from him. Subconsciously, she cuddled closer to him and exhaled. "It's hard for me to let this out, but I need to. Before I lose you."

"You won't lose me, Trina. You know that."

"Bull, I almost lost you just the other day. Twice apparently." She moved her hand to his chest, curling her fingers around the shirt he was wearing. It was a simple white shirt, probably something Anders had laying around. "Emotionally and physically, I just can't lose you. You don't understand. I can't, you're the only person in my life right now that means as much as you do…in the way that I mean, do you understand?"

"Yes, and, I love you too." Her heart skipped a beat and her cheeks turned magenta. She didn't really want to get into his fight with the golem, they'd been through it already. She had more important fish to fry. "So, you're struggling to tell me this? How can I make you feel more secure?"

She thought back to the various romances on the television screen and pondered if she could pull a line from them, but she really wanted to be serious. "Hold me and don't ever let me go?" Of course it slipped out, much to her embarrassment. Whenever she was nervous, she fell to such disgraces. Annoyed, she narrowed her eyes and mentally cursed herself. What other movie-inspired dialogues would she throw out now.

Sinjin seemed to pick up rather easily, he put his arm around her and gave her one kind smile and gently kissed her forehead. As he pulled away, he whispered three words, "As you wish." A play off a movie she, Lindsay and Salome would watch constantly. Though there was every bit of meaning, power and love in the way Sinjin said it that calmed her and pulled her towards him. She put her arms around him and set her head beneath his chin, nuzzling his neck. "So tell me what is on your mind. You're trembling."

"Because I'm nervous." She didn't even realize she was trembling, it seemed so natural to her. Sinjin hugged her close and her tremors started to simmer.

"No need to be so nervous. You know you can tell me anything, right?" He glanced past her to Tori and Anders talking to one another at the door, then glanced back to her. "You dragged your sister here too, I see."

"Yeah, I realize I probably didn't have to."

"You shouldn't be out here by yourself anyway, even if you could deal with the thugs. I don't think your father would like very well if something were to happen to you."

"What about you?"

"Me? Well. I would hate for something to happen to you." He reached up and groomed her hair back, tucking a strand of the hair in front of her face between his fingers and gingerly moving it to the side. She swallowed her breath and closed her eyes, struggling to stay awake but also struggling not to get up and run, or say something stupid that might distract them from this moment. "You mean the world to me, Trina. I can't imagine what my life would be like if you weren't a part of it."

"Boring?" She gave off a subtle smirk and lifted her shoulders. Her brow furrowed and her face fell flat as her lips thinned. She shook her head and felt a stray tear come to her eye. "I…am so afraid, Sinjin. Not of you or anything, it's just…I'm a bit worried whether I will scare you off. You know me better than anyone, and I'm scared…scared my insecurities and emotional damage will be too much. How do I know you won't leave me too?"

"I haven't left yet and I don't plan on it. Like it or not, Vega, you've got me. It isn't possible for you to scare me off."

"You mean like I did the others?"

"That wasn't you, and your friends know that. They each had their reasons for growing distant, and Lindsay is making her way back to you. You're something special, Trina. For you to impact someone's life so much that they either can't stop thinking about you or come back to you in the end…even Tori's friends, who are trying to become friends with you…That is talent in itself." She wore her heart on her sleeve, letting his soft-spoken words cradle her, lifting her spirits. She drew in a quick breath and held it for a moment, gazing into his confident eyes and longing for the embrace to continue through the night. "You're something else, you have a compassionate heart that…once people get through all of that exterior you have around yourself, they can truly see the hidden jewel that you are. You put one hundred percent into everything, you care about people, and you try your best."

"Well if you think I'm such a good person, why was it so damn difficult for other people to think it? What, did I try too hard or something?"

"All stuff that's in the past. You didn't do anything wrong, and those who have hurt you are trying their best to make it up for you. Finally seeing you for the person you are. Beautiful, headstrong, compassionate, and willing to do anything for a friend. You genuinely care about your family and for people, whether or not they deserve it, and you try not to talk down about anyone behind their back. You're a great person, a good person. Maybe you never volunteered at an animal shelter or something, like some might think your sister would do. Maybe you didn't convince a karaoke place to change their ways, or introduce a friend to an old crush, or other things that you talk about your sister's friends doing. It's the qualities I mentioned that make you, as I said, who you are, and those are what I fell in love with you over. Those qualities right there."

Trina was speechless, her thoughts were jumbled and her heart was beating a mile a minute. "I could volunteer at a kennel if you wanted me to…" She worked to regain her composure, still flushed as Sinjin let out a deep, melodious laugh. If ever she was attracted to him before, it was not nearly as much as she was in this moment. "Thank you…You know, you're a good person too. You care the world for your sister, never let anyone talk down to you and you have an amazing amount of love for my family…I think I take that for granted sometimes. If so, I'm sorry."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

Here she was, finally ready to bear her soul to the one man that she trusted. She had every right to be fearful of men, but not this one, he was different than most. She'd been cheated on, deserted, abused, and even assaulted. Not that she told anyone what Ross ever did to her, though Sinjin understood. He was different.

"Six. Six men before, all shit and none ever would say something like that. I wonder if maybe seventh wouldn't be so bad?" She dipped her eyes for a minute, studying her fingers on his chest, then slowly glanced back to him. "When I said you know me more than anyone else…Have you heard Shakira's song Antes de las Seis?"

"Yeah?"

"Well…she sings it, it's to her lover. She's saying that while she knows that he knows all the points on her body, she's leaving herself open to him. Vulnerable. Trusting that while he has the power to hurt her, because he knows so much of her, that he won't." Tears began to work their way down her cheeks and Sinjin slowly brushed them away with his thumb, smiling softly into her gaze. "I…I leave myself open to you. I want you by my side, and I…I trust you not to damage me like others before. I love you that much. If I…do that…"

"I'm not perfect, you know I'll make mistakes, but I'll do my best. I would never harm you. I'd love to have you by my side, more than a friend. Besides…" He chuckled and gently kissed her forehead. "Let Lindsay reclaim her 'best friend' title. Boyfriend…holds a better ring for me, don't you think?" Her cheeks flared up once more and she pressed herself closer to him, holding on tight.

"Yeah. I think so."

"You're safe with me. I promise, I won't hurt you."

"Holding you to it. As for Lindsay…I still don't know…That's not a trust issue or anything, I just-I'm not sure."

"We'll see when we get back home. For now, let's focus on one thing at a time. Your ancestor." She closed her eyes, slowly nodding in response. Sarah was perhaps most important right now. Trina reached up timidly, giving him a quick and gentle kiss on the lips. It wasn't something she thought about, but rather, a quick gesture that surprised her afterwards. It did send a shockwave of peace roaring through her body and down to her heart, it was startling. Before either of them could react to the kiss, she let out a loud yawn and began to drift off into slumber, forgetting that her sister was still waiting for her to get up so they could go home. "Trina?"

It would be fine, Tori could sleep here in the clinic somewhere. They'd leave in the morning.

So what are your thoughts here? And yes, Trina actually has been slowly moving past all those traumas of her past (This chapter being her biggest leap forward yet). Gotta remember friends, it takes time. Even when the story's finished, realistically, Trina would still have some issues to resolve, mostly with what her boyfriends did to her. She's still got insecurities but she's moving past them, and actually has been starting to move past them since Tori's friends rescued Sinjin). I've been waiting for her to get her ancestor's advice, but it was taking a while, that's why I threw in the last chapter. As for this point, rescuing the ancestor and so forth has the centerpoint, though you'll still see some hints of insecurity within Trina, but that's normal, because it's real. All those traumas, a person can't move past them in a couple weeks time. What's important is, she is getting much stronger.

So enough of that, tell me your thoughts on this chapter? Hopefully you went and listened to that song (Can I help it if I myself got hooked on Shakira? *sigh*), it's a very nice song. Now that Sinjin and Trina are together, they'll still take the relationiship carefully of course, not rushing into anything too huge.