Pray
Dean and Cas pray, they have.. feelings.
Destiel Warning
"Forgive me father, for I have sinned." Cas sank to his knees in a field not far from the city where himself and the Winchester's were working a case. "I broke the rules, I sinned in the highest. And I will forever try and repent my mistake." he prayed to his father.
"What mistake could you have possibly made Castiel?"
"Our task all those millennia ago, was to watch your creations, and never interact. Then little over a year ago, I was given a task, a mission, if you will. Watch over the human vessel, for Michael." Castiel picked one of the poppies that was growing in the field where he knelt. He twirled it in his fingers as he spoke, "The task seemed easy enough," he said,
"But you believe you have failed, my son?"
"That is not where my failure lies. Dean Winchester, is still very much alive." he stared into the centre of the flower.
"Then, where have you failed me?"
"Is it a sin to fall in love, father?" Cas muttered.
"A sin to fulfil your core purpose? Not at all Castiel."
"What if the person you'd fallen in love with wasn't a person you should love?" He asked.
"There isn't any human on this earth that does not deserve love."
"What if the bible says it isn't right?" He plucked a petal from the flower and let the breeze carry it a few meters across the grass. "'Man shall not lie with man, as he lies with his woman.'"
"Castiel, I did not write the bible. What it says is what people have interpreted from my prophets."
"But what if you still feel it is a sin?" He plucked a few more petals.
"All the more reason to act upon it. Love is your purpose, Castiel."
"But Father, it hurts. The person doesn't feel the same way. It hurts to know he- they're there, and they don't know, and will never return the emotions." More petals.
"That is love, son. Tell him what is in your heart, you my be surprised at the response."
"It feels a sin to think the words, I cannot speak them to, father." The flower run out of petals.
"Speak them to me. Tell me of your love. Begin to fulfil your purpose."
"I- I- I- I can't." He twinned his fingers in the grass.
"You can."
Cas laid back in the grass and closed his eyes, he took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of poppies and mud. Smiling he said, slowly and clearly, "I love Dean Winchester."
***
Dean perched on the end of his motel bed, an unopened bottle of beer in his hands. Cas was out doing 'angel stuff' and Sam was off having some 'man time,' leaving Dean in the motel alone. He closed his eyes,
"Alright big man, you know I don't often do this. But I can't pray to who I normally do, can I?" He cracked open the bottle with the bottle opener that he'd left on the bed. "I have a problem with someone and I haven't got a clue what to do. I can't talk to Sammy, and Cas it would just be... Awkward and really problematic." He took a gulp from the bottle, "So, I thought its easier just to talk to the man in the sky. Ya know, the guy that put us all here and then threw in all of crazy for me to handle. No awkwardness though, yeah."
He down half the beer, "So, my problem... I s'pose I should do it the conventional way." Dean tucked the bottle in between his legs and put his hands together.
"Dear God, I've got a feeling I've never had before. And I think it might be love, but I swore when I left the Pit I'd never care about anything anymore. I get this feeling every time he- they look at me, every word they speak. And I don't even know what the hell to do. I s'pose the objective of this praying-thingy is I'm in love with someone I shouldn't be in love with, and I don't know what to do. Amen?" He downed the rest of his beer.
As if someone had open a window in a storm, a huge gust of wind swept through the room flicking open the bible that Sam had left on the table after doing research for their case.
Dean pushed himself off the bed and walk across the room to the table, placing the empty beer bottle on a clear space. It had landed open on a page in 'John.' He picked up the book and scanned the page, all the text seemed tiny, to small to even read, apart from one line,
'And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.'
Dean said it aloud a few times, trying to make sense of it. He knew that if he couldn't work it out, he wouldn't be able to ask Cas or Sam.
"The truth? What truth? And this truth will set me free? What truth? Free of what?" He snapped the bible shut, and tossed it on the chair.
He walked over to Sam's bed and pulled out the laptop, and googled a bible translator-type-thing. When he entered the verse it gave him a simple response,
'Say what the truth is, and it will set you free/make you happier'
Dean shut the screen, "So I have to say what this is about and it'll make me feel better?" He said to himself aloud. He put the laptop away and laid back on his brothers bed, he stretched his hands behind his head, and closed his eyes,
"If its the only way to do this, then I s'pose, I am in love with Castiel."
***
"I love Dean Winchester."
Cas open his eyes and smiled, saying it aloud wasn't as hard as he thought it'd be. He sat up and then moved to a kneel.
"Father, you have once again shown me my true path, and allowed me to work out how I am to proceed. For this, again, I give thanks. Thank you, amen."
"Cloud your eyes, should you must. But your brain must remain ever unfogged, if it is to see your path."
Castiel stood up, let the rest of the flower flutter away in the breeze and flashed back to the motel.
***
"If its the only way to do this, then I s'pose, I am in love with Castiel." Dean breathed heavily, his eyes still closed, it was strange, he half expected to feel different now he'd said his feeling aloud, but the reality of his predicament seemed almost all to clear, and as though they were outlined in bright lights, engraved in his brain.
Castiel cleared his throat quietly,
"Uh, Dean?"
Dean opened his eyes and sat up quickly.
"Damn, Cas! How long have you been standing there!?" He almost shouted. Cas rubbed the back of his head,
"The best part of about 15 seconds." Dean looked at the floor and sighed a little,
"So you heard..?" He asked. Cas sat on the other bed, facing Dean,
"Yes, Dean. I heard your... confession." Dean swore under his breath.
"I suppose, there's no real denial to try and give then." Castiel smiled, uncertainly.
"I suppose not. But there is something I need to say, as, I suppose, and extension of what you said." Dean looked up, confused. "I came back to talk to you about a problem I have, and you are, quite possibly, the only person I can really ask."
"Go on." Dean pushed.
"I went to a field today, because it was a peaceful place I could go and think. But when thinking failed, I turned to asking my father, and he gave me the answers I think I needed." Cas continued.
"Yes?" Dean prompted.
"I told him about a problem I had. A problem with how I felt in here," he put his hand on his heart, "And my father told me to speak my problem aloud, and let it help me, and give me strength to fix the problem."
"And the problem?" Dean pressed.
Cas flashed so he was knelt in front of Dean, hands resting on the mans knees.
"Dean Winchester, I cannot help but share your love. I think perhaps, if I do not tell you now how I feel, I will explode. I love you." Dean put his hand atop the angels',
"I can't help but return how you feel. Its like a pain burning through me, worse than anything I've ever experienced, worse than Hell. If I hadn't said it today, I think I might have exploded with you. I can't help it, as weak as such emotion makes me feel, I love you to."