A/N: Thank God it's Tuesday again. I couldn't wait to give you a few answers to your questions.

I hope all of you had a wonderful and romantic Valentine's Day. Mine was not so wonderful but that's a different story.

Anyway, I'd like to ask you all to give a round of applause for my fantastic betas EdwardsMate4ever and evelyn-shaye who polish my words and make them shine. I also want to thank my prereader Vampgirl79 for always being there for me when I need her. You ladies are wonderful and I wouldn't know what to do without you.

Now I'll let you get to it. See you at the bottom.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight but I'll be eternally grateful to Stephenie Meyer for giving all our fantasies a chance to live.

******POMH******

Chapter 23 – A Ghost From the Past

Negotiations are coming to an end. Finally. Can't wait be home. - E

I was reading Edward's most recent text while I waited for my coffee to-go. I smiled at his impatience to return to Seattle. Unfortunately, he'd been too busy to call me over the last few days, so our phone sex on Wednesday was the only time we'd actually talked to each other since he'd left. Although we'd exchanged numerous text messages, I was missing him badly and couldn't wait to see him again on Saturday.

It was Friday afternoon, and I was on my way back to the studio after an appointment with a client. My evening with Alice the night before had distracted me from my current loneliness, as well as the insecurity about having to tell Edward how I felt.

I sent a quick text back, telling him that I was happy he'd been successful and that I was looking forward to seeing him again as the boy behind the counter handed me the cup.

Scrolling through all the messages Edward had sent me over the past days, I left the cafe when I unexpectedly bumped into someone.

"Sorry," I murmured, and without really looking up from my phone, I turned to walk toward my car.

"Bella?" a deep, husky voice called after me.

I froze where I stood. I would recognize that voice out of a million. It had been resounding in my ears for what felt like a lifetime.

Unable to turn around and look at the man whose memory had been haunting me day and night for years, I stayed rigid. I was feeling paralyzed while dozens of different emotions rushed over me.

"Bella Swan, is that you?" he asked again, trying to get me to look at him.

I took a deep breath, turned around slowly, and for the first time in seven years, I laid eyes on Jacob Black. He seemed to be as surprised to see me as I was. I'd never expected to run into him in the streets of Seattle when he was supposed to be living in New York. At least that's what I'd been told.

His expression was pained but at the same time relieved. After hesitating for a good while, he slowly walked the few steps over to me.

"Jacob!" was the only word I could choke out. I felt strange. For years, I had imagined a situation like this, running into him unexpectedly. In the beginning, I'd been sure I would cry when all the pent-up hurt and love came crashing down on me. Then later, when I'd begun to get over him, I would have bet everything I had that I'd scratch his eyes out and knee him in the crotch, releasing all the anger I'd harbored for so long — taking revenge for the way he'd fucked up my life.

Now that he was really standing in front of me, I felt none of said emotions. There was neither a need to attack him nor to kiss him. I couldn't believe it, but just that second, I realized that all the passion I'd felt loving him as well as hating him was gone. It had probably vanished a while ago, and I just hadn't noticed.

Standing there, looking into each other's eyes, neither of us seemed to know what to say. We'd known each other forever, and now we weren't even able to exchange a few pleasantries.

Jacob hadn't changed much. His brown eyes were still bright, his black hair short and glossy, and his beautiful russet skin was only starting to show a few lines around his eyes. He still looked fit.

"Bella," Jake started after a very long moment. "How are you? You're looking great." His voice sounded a bit shaky.

"I'm fine. What are you doing here in Seattle? Last thing I heard, you were still living in New York." I clutched the strap of my purse to hide my nervousness.

"I am. I'm here on business. I just flew in this morning, and I leave next Saturday." He uneasily shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "So you still live here?"

"Yes. I lived with Alice until she and Jasper bought a house three years ago."

We were both quiet again, and I hated the awkwardness between us. I'd never been good with uncomfortable situations.

"Bella, I'm actually really glad I ran into you. I wanted to tell you once again how sorry I am for everything that happened between us all those years ago." His expression was sincere, and I was sure he was about to continue.

I interrupted him before he would get any deeper into it. "Jacob, this is neither the time nor the place for that conversation."

"Are you in a hurry, or can I buy you some coffee, and we can talk?" His face was hopeful, and I decided that, since no client was directly involved, I could do the rest of my work later that day or tomorrow.

"I have a little time."

We went back into the cafe where I had just bought my coffee to-go and sat down at a table in a quiet corner. Only after the waitress had taken our order, Jacob began to speak.

"I was hoping to meet you while I'm here. It's a good thing we ran into each other like that, because I doubt I'd have mustered the courage to call you." He paused to clear his throat before he continued. "I'm sorry, Bella, for everything I did and said the last time we saw each other. I've been beating myself up about it for so long. I'm still embarrassed." He hung his head, his apology honest.

"Jake, for years I've been wrecking my brain over and over to understand what happened, and I came up with nothing." Maybe he could finally explain his behavior, and I could put my inner unease about that to rest.

Again there was nothing but silence. The waitress brought our order, and I started to sip my coffee. Jacob put cream and sugar in his cup and stirred for a good while before he took a deep breath and finally began to speak again.

"You caught me by surprise. When I came home that summer, I'd expected to find the little sister I'd left when I went to college. But time didn't stand still, not even in Forks." He gave a short humorless chuckle at his own joke. "You were no child anymore and barely even a teenager. You had become a woman — a beautiful woman. I instantly fell for you. But I wanted to keep you as my friend. I was torn between my need to be close to you and the feeling that it was all wrong — like incest in a way." He scrunched his nose, not looking at me while he went on explaining.

"There was no future for us, anyway. You were here. I was in New York. And that night, I was suddenly overcome by my desire for you. I let my guard down, and it happened. I felt that it was wrong immediately after, and I didn't know how to handle it. So I ran away. It was unfair to you, and I'm really sorry for that." His voice had not been much more than a whisper. Somehow what he said made sense, and I was surprised to find that talking about all that didn't hurt anymore.

"Jake, I kind of understand that, or I'm trying. But what happened in New York is beyond my comprehension." Even though I hadn't intended it, my words came out like an accusation.

"I was embarrassed and sorry for what I'd done to you in Forks. But I was also so very happy to see you again, to have the chance to make things up and be your friend again. You were so important to me. You still are." One of his hands reached out to touch mine. But he thought better of it and placed it on the table in front of him instead. I was relieved. So I carefully let out the breath I'd been holding, afraid of Jacob touching me in such an intimate way.

"Then everything got out of hand. I said some things that came out wrong and I didn't want to say. And when you tried to leave, I panicked. I couldn't let you go like that. But when we were standing so close to each other at the door, I just lost control. I needed you so much. I wanted to make everything up to you. I told you the truth when I said I loved you. And I really wanted to be with you." His eyes bore into mine as if he could make me believe him with his stare. "Then, right after, I realized that I couldn't."

I nodded shortly. "Because you had a girlfriend you didn't tell me about." It was said matter-of-factly. I had come to terms with it long ago.

"Not only that. I didn't love her, and we broke up soon after you left. But there were still my rivaling emotions, feelings like I had defiled my sister. And then, Bella, I wasn't boyfriend material. I was never faithful to my girlfriends back then. I was egoistical, I was stupid, and my career always came first. I didn't want you to be a part of that, and I figured it would be better to hurt you that once than having to hurt you again and again if we'd been together. I wasn't ready for a serious commitment, but you deserved nothing less than that. I've been thinking about that night a lot, and I've been regretting it ever since. I'm so sorry."

He seemed to have given the whole thing a lot of thought over the years. His expression was that of a sinner who was waiting to be absolved from his sins. And I was the only person in the world who could give him that. I wanted to redeem him of his guilt because I'd moved on and was finally in a good place. But before I could do that, I needed him to know what he'd really done to me.

"Jake, what happened back then has affected me for so long. I felt cheap and easy for losing my virginity to someone who didn't even take me out on a date. It has taken me years to open up to a man again. If we'd met any earlier, I might have tried to kill you on the spot. But I want you to know that I'm over all of that. My life is back on track, and I'm happy. I forgive you. I think I forgave you a long time ago. I just didn't see it." I felt relieved when I noticed that Jake's expression changed, like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

"Thank you, Bells. That means so much to me." Now he dared to place his hand on top of mine that was lying on the table, squeezing it emphatically. Although it was strange to feel his touch, I let him be.

"I think I'm saying this as much for my own sake as I'm saying it for yours. I've been carrying this around long enough." I flashed him a small but genuine smile, and he mirrored it.

When I looked at Jake now, with all the pain and regret behind us, I realized how much I'd missed him all these years. Not the guy I'd been in love with, but my brother — the boy that had known me almost my entire life. And I longed to reconnect with him in some way.

"Bella, is there any chance of us being friends again?" he asked, almost holding his breath while waiting for my answer.

I really wanted that. "We can try. Tell me about you. What have you been doing?"

And he told me that he was still working at the bank. He'd bought a condo a few years ago. Once, he'd almost gotten married but chickened out. He hadn't seen his father in years and missed him, but he'd never dared to come near Folks.

It was nice to learn about him again. The longer he talked, the more the awkwardness disappeared, and he turned into my Jacob again; the guy who'd played with me, the one we'd had family barbeques with.

"So, what about you? What's there to know about Bella?" he asked when he was done reporting about himself.

"Nothing much," I answered.

I talked about my job, how I worked with Jasper. That Alice and I were as close as ever. I told him about Charlie and Sue and news from Folks. What I didn't talk about was the thing that was really dearest to my heart. Edward was constantly on my mind, and he was the whole reason I was able to forgive Jake. But since I didn't really know where we stood on the whole relationship thing, I decided it would be better to not mention him at all, and Jacob didn't seem to dare ask whether I had a boyfriend.

We had a good time after the heavy stuff was said and done with. We sat in the cafe for about an hour, catching up and laughing a lot.

"Jake, I have to go. I have to talk to my assistant before she leaves the studio for the weekend. Maybe we can meet some other time this week. Why don't you call Jasper, and we can do something together?" I said as I stood up to leave.

"I'd like that. I'll give him a call." He stood up as well, looking at me as if deliberating something before he hesitantly closed the gap between us and gave me a cautious hug. I stiffened slightly, but when I realized that there was nothing inappropriate or sexual about the gesture, I relaxed a little and hugged him back.

"Bye, Jacob." I pulled away from him and walked towards the door.

"Bye, Bella," he said just as I left the cafe.

Now that I'd finally gotten some closure, I couldn't wait for Edward to come home so that I could move on with my life. And for the first time in my adult life, I was looking optimistically into the future — a future with Edward.

********POMH********

A/N: Why do I get the feeling that it won't be that easy? Right, because I'm writing this ;). But don't worry, as I already told you several times, there will be a HEA.

So, do you believe Jacob? I hope you see now that he's not all bad. He really cares for Bella although it didn't seem that way back then.

I apologize for the lack of Edward in this chapter but he's just not yet back from New Orleans. I promise he'll be back in chapter 24.

And what's next? Well, it's about to get a little rough. Here's a teaser:

… "So, Bells, is Edward here your boyfriend?" Jake asked the very worst question in the world in a light, conversational tone. …

Oh, oh! Poor Bella! What's she supposed to answer? Tell me here or on FB in the group Payton79's Fanfiction.

See you next week with some explanations.