A/N

Thank you LoveShipper, MissWeasley8 and tephriam for your reviews!

Summary of previous chapter:

Ally rejected Austin's proposal. It was awkward. They went home and found out her dad died. There were a lot of tears.

Ok, so something that I though I should tell you guys is that my mom is my editor, she has to check what I write. This is why they haven't kissed yet, she read the chapter that I was planning on having them kiss in and kinda banned me from anything "intimate". THEY WILL KISS IN THIS STORY THOUGH. On the good side of this, I have someone who reads over these to check for stupid mistakes, on the bad side, she said she can only read oneish a week so…yeah.

Disclaimer: Don't own Austin and Ally

I sit on my bed, hugging my knees as the numbers change yet again on my phone. It's now three in the morning and I can't sleep. I've never had insomnia before and I'm so tired that I would cry if I had any tears left, but I don't. I can't believe my father is actually dead. My bed is strewn with old albums of when I was really little, before everything happened. Dad didn't want them so I took them when I moved out; he said it was too painful to look at them. I understand what he means now, but at the same time I'm drawn to the pictures. I flip the page and look at a picture of myself and my parents at the beach. We all look so happy, my dad smiling, blue eyes twinkling, my mom laughing as I in my little red bathing suite and pigtails hold a crab in my hands, looking awed. I wish I could go back to that moment and hold it forever. That moment when I was so young, innocent and happy. That moment when my parents were alive and we were all there for each other. That moment before I had experienced what the world can throw at you.

I touch my dad's face in the picture, I wonder if he even remembered me, if he mentioned me before he died, if he missed me. I sigh, I wish I could talk to someone, Rydel is probably asleep though and I pushed Austin away. Why did he still try to help me so much after I rejected him? It's the eleventh; I only have twenty days left of summer. I lay back on my soft blanket; I should try again to sleep. Sleep won't come to me though, my mind keeps jumping around; Austin, Dad, camping, school, work, tears, the dryness of my feet. Songs also play in my head, not full ones, just snippits of them.

I need your love

I need your time

When everything's wrong,

You make it right.

And when the daylight comes I'll have to go

But tonight I'm gonna hold you so close

'Cause in the daylight we'll be on our own

But tonight I need to hold you so close.

If our love is tragedy why are you my remedy?

If our love's insanity why are you my clarity?

Tell me what you want to hear

Something that were like those years

I'm sick of all the insincere

So I'm gonna give all my secrets away.

The songs playing are all fairly different; I Need Your Love, Daylight, Clarity and Secrets aren't songs that would usually mix. I can't stop the songs that keep coming though and they keep me awake.

-Line Break-

After hours of laying on my bed, thinking and unable to rest, the gentle rays of sunlight peek in through my window. I can't believe it's already sunrise, which although it's summer and the sun rises pretty early, means that it's around five in the morning. I don't feel like doing anything today, the nice weather mocks the dark mood that hangs over my shoulders. Since I'm not getting anywhere with sleep I decide to go downstairs. The house hasn't been cleaned thoroughly in a long time and I need something to distract my mind with, if only until Austin comes and I can be with him so I set about doing all that stuff that no one bothers about unless there's company. I clean the toilets, dust everything, and beat the rugs like they did in pioneer days with a large spoon. The beating of the rugs was a great way to get rid of any frustration; I beat the life out of those things. After that I swept and mopped the floor, mowed the lawn, swept the drive way, washed the windows, scrubbed the tubs, washed both Trish's and my cars and baked some banana bread with old, but not yet rotten bananas. To make the floor look especially shiny, I decided to wax it as well, my thoughts drifted while doing this though and before I knew it tears were dripping off my cheeks. I quickly wipe away my tears, finish and flop down on the couch thinking that some TV would be nice.

There is nothing on that I want to watch, but I leave it on Travel Channel if only for background noise and something to look at every once in a while. I thought that now would be a good time to talk with Rydel. As I turn on my phone, I catch a glance at the time, it's noon, I have the revelation that I'd been working for seven hours with no sleep no wonder I'm so exhausted. None the less, I still call Rydel. On the fourth ring she picks up.

"Hello, this is Rydel. Could you call back some other time, we're rehearsing right now. Thanks," she says nonchalantly.

"Um, Rydel, this is Ally. I have something I need to talk to someone about," I'm so upset with myself right now! Why can't I even just say that without my voice cracking?

"Oh, ok. We can talk now, one sec." I can tell she's not talking to me when her voice is slightly muffled as she yells, "I gotta take a break boys!" Her voice back to normal tone she asks, "What's up, Ally?"

"Austin proposed to me, but I couldn't accept because I was scared and then I got home and received the news that my dad died while I was camping!"

"Oh dear. Do you just need to vent?" I shake my head and then remember she can't see me through the phone.

"No, but thanks, Rydel. I kinda vented last night, I was just gonna ask your advice."

"Ok. You can tell me or ask me anything, Ally, just know that."

"Thanks. Well, I was wondering if you think I was wrong to not accept Austin's proposal."

"Hmmm. You two definitely have strong chemistry, but I think you should go at your own pace. I can tell that he really loves you and you love him back though so take that into consideration." I nod, but once again, she can't see it.

"Thanks for your input. I realize now that all my previous fears can be handled…except my dad. Once I recover a little from the blow of his death, I think I'll accept. I'll have to get him alone and stuff like he did to me."

"Ooooh! Can I see a picture of the ring if you have it with you?"

I laugh, "Sure, Rydel. I'll also tell you about how he did it." I take a picture and send it to her before launching into how Austin proposed while we were camping. We continue talking until I start yawning continually and have to tell her goodbye. I lay down from my sitting position on the couch, grab a nearby blanket and drift off to sleep.

-Line Break -

I hear the lock on the front door clicking; I jump off the couch and run into the kitchen to grab a weapon. I grab a frying pan because I just wouldn't feel right using a knife. The door opens and in walks Trish. I give a sigh of relieve and put down the frying pan.

"Hey, Trish. How was Cassidy's?"

"Good. Why are you still in yesterday's clothes?"

"Eh, couldn't sleep and was too lazy to change," I tell her. The truth was, I hadn't even thought to change, my mind was too preoccupied.

She shrugs, "'Kay. Well, I'm going up to sleep 'cause I got none."

"Ok, sleep well." Trish nods and goes upstairs groggily. I check my phone, it's five in the afternoon; I wonder why Austin isn't here yet. My stomach grumbles and I'm reminded that I haven't eaten anything since the sandwich I had for lunch yesterday. I order pizza and sit back down on the couch. That guy who travels around and eats random, gross stuff is on TV, I think the show's called Bizarre Foods or something. I cover my eyes as he eats sheep eyes and chicken intestines, eww! How could someone even eat that stuff? I change the channel to Food Network, but that just makes me hungrier so I go On Demand and watch the new episode of Face Off. About halfway through the doorbell rings, I pause my show and answer it excitedly, it's not Austin, but pizza is just as good right now. Taking the whole box, I return to the couch and dig in. I inhale three slices without even tasting them and then slow down some so I can enjoy it as well as fill myself.

Checking the time, it's six now, Austin should definitely have been here by this time. The pizza is safely stashed away in the fridge for later and so I decide to text Austin. I leave the TV on Food Network while I text, it no longer makes me hungry 'cause I stuffed myself with six pieces of pizza.

Hey, Austin. I wait for about five minutes before texting again. Austin I thought you were coming over today. Again, there's no response. Austin answer me! Why aren't you answering me? You were so understanding yesterday! Don't leave me! Austin! Austin! Austin! I send the texts, but still no answer. I decide to call him instead, he doesn't pick up and I leave a message. I'm a little worried, I know that I hurt him, and yet he was so loving yesterday night so why is he acting this way now? Did he just realize to the fullest that I rejected him? I want him; I was confused; those twenty-four hours were insanity! I call again and he doesn't pick up again. I shake my head, fine; if he doesn't want to see me then he doesn't have to, but I can't stop my eyes from tearing up. I want to scream, I'm so angry at myself for all these tears, I'm not a weakling, it's because I let Austin melt the wall protecting my heart.

I go upstairs and get into my shower, figuring that the warm water will soothe me. I wash and condition my hair and then just stand there, letting the water flow over me. The entire bathroom is steamy and warm; I relax, finally in a fairly good mood. Unfortunately, the hot water only lasts so long, when in starts to cool down, I turn it off and step out. I get into my comfy music note pajamas and crawl in bed. I yawn and snuggle into the covers; I'm super tired even though I had a nap earlier. Dougie is in my arms and I let the worries of the day disappear, if only while I lay in the safe embrace of sleep.

Darkness surrounds me as I fall. The voices of my family members echo around me. "Why didn't you come to see him in the hospital or at least to his funeral?" my aunt says.

"She's an uncaring little brat. You know she hasn't even talked to her father in years!" That was my stepmom. I try to tell them why, but I can't speak. My mouth moves and yet no sound comes out. I clutch my throat.

"Really?! I expected so much more of you Ally!" Even the kind voice of my mother is used against me. I feel my eyes start to water and I curl my hands into tight fists, trying to fight them off.

"What's this? Angry are we?"

"Ha! You deserve this, you miserable girl!"

"How you rejected that guy who loves you after you said you loved him too; just cruel m'darling!" My anger dies as I feel my cheeks dampen. I sigh heavily.

"Feeling remorse now?"

"Maybe you should wake up and tell him how you really feel!"

"Wake up, Ally!"

"Wake up, Ally!"

I open my eyes and I'm not falling; I'm laying on my bed and Trish is looking at me. "Oh, good, you woke up. You were kind of moaning in your sleep and I thought I should do something. Well, 'night," she says and walks out. I guess even sleep isn't safe right now so I go downstairs. I sit on the couch and dig into a tub of my favorite ice-cream; fruity mint swirl. I watch a few episodes of Mystery Diners and feeling better from the sugar and interesting show, I decide I can go upstairs and sleep again. I get back into bed and drift into a deep, dreamless sleep.

A/N

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~Maggie