Ducks.

Bruce decided that he officially hated ducks.

Feathery little demons, impossible to find, and they fly away the moment you do—it was impossible! It really is impossible, Bruce thought. We'll never get all these ducks, much less before Tony gets back. He winced. From the moment Tony had invited him to live in the tower, he'd worried that he'd…make a mess. Bruce supposed that this was the inevitable mess he'd been waiting for.

Of course Bruce had figured the mess would be less feathers, and more smash and green.

"I'm never leaving you alone with Bruce again," Clint commented as he searched his floor for ducks. He was speaking to Harry, who was still in the baby carrier on his back. Clint sort of wished he could see Harry as he spoke—what was the baby's reaction to Clint talking? Was he paying attention? Could babies pay attention? "You know, I really wonder what it feels like to be you right now. Maybe then I could figure out what I'm supposed to be doing with you. What's the deal with the ducks anyways? I mean, I didn't like that couch much either, but I don't shoot arrows into it." Well, Clint thought. That actually isn't such a bad idea.

"Ducks!" he called. "Come out, ducks! I won't hurt you! Tasha says I'm not allowed." He tried to look over his shoulder, at Harry. "Natasha says I can't shoot things in front of you… 'No killing in front of the baby!' Nah, she didn't say it like that, of course. Still kinda funny, though." He smiled as he walked, still looking for the elusive ducks. "Natasha's a mother. Now there's one I definitely didn't see coming. Didn't see you coming. But you know," he said thoughtfully. "I'm not that surprised that she's taken such a liking to you. I mean, you are a pretty likeable baby. But the more I think about it, the less strange it is to see Natasha hold you."

Natasha was having considerably more luck that her teammates. She'd already caught three. It was easier than the fight with the Chitauri. It was a little more aggravating though. She'd had a little more difficulty within the last few minutes; she hadn't been able to find any. She suddenly recalled what (or who, depending on one's definition of a person) else was in the tower, and why hadn't she thought of it before?

"JARVIS," she called.

"Greetings, Ms. Romanoff," the AI answered.

"Ducks," she said simply. "In the tower. Can you track them for me?"

"I've already been monitoring them. Shall I inform you of where the one nearest to you current location?"

"Yes, please."

"Third door to your right. That is the last duck on this floor. May I suggest going down to Thor's floor next?"

Natasha gave a small smirk. "Thank you, JARVIS."

When Steve came home to the tower, he initially thought that it was like it usually was. Nothing had changed. One would never think that it now housed a magical baby. Steve continued to think this until he made it to his bedroom.

He opened the door.

Well, he hadn't seen that coming. Ducks?

There were two ducks in his room.

Steve blinked, and looked around. Was somebody watching this? Was this a joke?

Those ducks…they were…

"Oh." Steve's cheeks flushed. He took off his shirt…got closer, quietly, slowly, ignoring what they were doing in his room.

All at once he leapt to them, as they tried to fly off, he took the shirt and used it like a bag to catch them.

It worked. They were struggling, and Steve worried that they would get away. Shirts, after all, weren't made to be used to hold ducks. But what was he supposed to do?

He frowned, and once again looked around. How did those ducks get there? Stark? For a moment Steve wondered if it was some sort of prank Tony was pulling. If it was, he realized, Tony was probably watching from another room. Steve put a very fake, very annoyed, smile on his face.

"Ha, ha, yeah. Very funny, Tony. Put a pair of… mating ducks in my room. You know, you're one of the oldest members of the team, but you just…" Steve trailed off, peeved at Tony. "You know what Tony? You really just…I try my best to get along, but this is just…I've had it. You like these ducks? You can have them. You can have the ducks do things in your room."

Steve left his room, still using his shirt as a net. Never, ever had he encountered anyone as infuriating as Tony Stark.

"…And Tony's just great company. I mean, he's not the sort of person who's just nicety, nice fake. He sort of annoys you, but you learn to like it. Steve's still learning. But I'm just glad to have them. Hell, that's almost as much of a surprise as you, Wizard Baby. But I bet you'll love growing up with all of us. Tasha as your mom, and Steve, Thor, Bruce, and Tony as your uncles—we'll spoil you rotten, of course," Clint said, grinning. He hadn't had any luck finding the ducks, but he'd actually enjoyed being with Harry, who'd just giggle occasionally.

"Duckee!" Harry giggled. Clint turned around quickly (he hoped that turning fast wouldn't be harmful to Harry) and true enough, there were four ducks. Clint raced towards them and they flew away. Clint chased after them. They kept on flying down the halls.

Ugh! He'd never catch them! He looked over his shoulder. "Don't tell your mother about this," Clint said conspiratorially. He took Harry off his back, set him on the floor of the hall, and took out his bow and an arrow. He saw the ducks further down the hallway.

He aimed, he let the arrow fly. It burst into a net, and swallowed the ducks up. Clint grinned. Harry giggled, amused. Clint looked down at Harry as he picked him up again.

"You like that? Hmm. Wonder how wizards are at archery. You know, I may just have to teach you."

Bruce was on the edge of turning green when Thor came back from Asgard. The moment Thor saw the green tint in his friend's skin, he came and tried to calm him down.

"What is wrong, Doctor? What angers you?"

"Ducks!" Bruce said. He rubbed his temple, and tried to calm down. Harry was in the tower, he reminded himself. Seeing Thor's confused expression, he explained. "…and we really don't want Tony to find out about this mess. I've found four of them, but they're so ridiculously hard to find, much less to catch."

Thor gave a huge smile. "It would be a pleasure to assist you, my friend."

Bruce gave an embarrassed smile back. "Thanks."

Soon enough, Natasha, Bruce, Clint, and Thor had rounded up twenty one ducks. They were pretty certain that this was all of them. They tried to decide what to do with them. They wondered if they could get Harry to turn them back, but ultimately decided not to test it. Harry, after all, was a baby and probably didn't have much control. The last thing they needed was for the ducks to be replaced with lions, or something.

Bruce's phone rang. He checked who it was. He groaned, looking at the others. He answered. "Hi, Tony."

"Bruce! Nice to hear you. How's Harry?"

"Harry's doing fine. Clint, Natasha, and Thor all got back, and he's been spending some quality time with Clint."

"I'm jealous. Can't wait to get home and spend some time with him myself! You know, on my way back, I've been thinking of some ideas for toys—don't worry, they're kid friendly, I assure you. No fire, or anything."

"And…when are you going to be home exactly?" Bruce couldn't keep his anxiety out of his voice.

"Two minutes top. Why-"

"Talktoyouthen." Bruce said quickly, snapping the phone shut. He looked frantically at the others. "Get the ducks outside, now."

The four avengers scrambled to get the twenty one ducks outside. Thankfully, they flew away. They all tried to look normal for when Tony got back. Bruce had his glasses on and read a random book he'd found. He didn't particularly like it, but it made it look normal. Clint turned on the TV. He'd wanted to watch The Woman In Black, but Natasha insisted that it wasn't appropriate to play in front of Harry.

("He's not actually watching it," Clint pointed out.

"It's a horror movie. Even I know better than to put a horror movie on in front of a baby.")

If you asked Clint, what they were watching now was much more horrifying.

Thor, like Bruce, grabbed a random book. His was in Chinese. Thor stared at it intently, pretending to absorb information.

This was the scene Tony arrived to. He greeted everyone, and went over to say hi to Harry, who was in Natasha's arms now. He found the situation…strange. It was normal…but not.

Just then, Steve walked in, not wearing a shirt.

Tony raised his eyebrow. "Did Harry puke on you?"

Steve raised an eyebrow back at him. "Sure Tony. The baby puked on me." He frowned. "Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you."

"I just got back. Why? Do you need something?"

Steve suddenly got this grin. He shook his head. "No, I don't need anything. I just wanted to say thank you."

Tony blinked. "Uh…you're welcome? What are you thanking me for?"

Steve laughed. "You know what for. I returned 'the favor.' It's in your room."

Tony blinked again. And again. "What the hell did you do to my room?" He turned to go to his room, but stopped for a moment. He turned to Thor. "Hey, Thor, buddy. You know you're reading that book upside down, right?"

Thor looked at the book. He hadn't understood the characters if the language, and had been holding it upside-down the entire time. He nodded. "Thank you."

"No problem." Tony raced to his room wondering what the hell Captain America of all the freaking people had done to his room.

"When'd you get back, Steve?" Clint asked. Bruce and Thor both put down their books.

"About an hour ago," Steve answered.

"Really?" Bruce said. "Shame we didn't see you earlier. We really could have used more help."

Steve looked concerned. "What? What was wrong?"

"Our first encounter with magic," Bruce answered.

"He turned the couch into a bunch of ducks," Clint said (was that pride in his voice?)

Steve froze. "Ducks? He turned the couch into ducks?"

Clint nodded slowly. "That's what I just said."

"These ducks…where did they go?"

"Everywhere," Natasha replied.

"Worry not, Steven," Thor said. "We have already captured them all, and set them free."

"Oh, no," Steve groaned. "No, no, no."

"What's wrong?" Clint asked.

"I found a pair of ducks in my room. Doing…things. I thought it was a prank. I thought Tony…so I took the ducks and…" Steve stopped, blushing.

Bruce leapt up from his seat. "What did you do with those ducks?"

Steve winced.

The five avengers heard what sounded like a scream, muffled by the floors.

They waited for a few moments.

Tony appeared, gaping at Steve.

"Ducks?"

Hello again! I really hope everyone enjoyed this!

Heads up, next chapter's going back to the wizarding world.

Um...what else is there?

If you want to know how I see the Avengers moving in together, I'm also writing a fic about that. So...please review?