A/N: Okay, I called Clyde's sister Megan. It's quite a popular name, and has Irish origins, like his does. Just to stop any confusion you may have.

There's No Tacos in the Nile

"So how was your date last night?"

"It was... unexpected, but it was like, actually amazing."

Craig smirked. "Did you end up getting lucky then?"

From across the school hallway, Clyde could see Kevin giggling; he was trying not to let the cuteness, and irresistible sense of urgency to kiss those giggling lips, distract him. There weren't many other people around, and Kevin could hear everything the two boys, plus Token, were saying. It amused him greatly.

Clyde's face tinged with red as he frowned. "Shut up, dude," he mumbled.

Token patted Clyde on the back, grinning. "Oh it sounds like you didn't, tough luck, Donavan."

"Well did you at least make out?" asked Craig.

Clyde looked mischievously over at Kevin then. "Yeah, I got a good kiss out of it."

Kevin bit his lip, feeling suddenly shy, seeing that no one else was watching him, he made a small wink in Clyde's direction. Clyde felt he was blushing again and grudgingly turned his attention back to Craig, but God damn it was hard to not look at those blue eyes.

"I've never seen her, does she even go here?"

"No, she goes to ermm... Adam's County. Yeah, I met her at a... barn dance." Clyde ran his hand through his hair, wondering where the hell that lie came from.

Craig looked at Clyde in surprise, "You went to a barn dance. Do you think you'll see her again?"

Clyde smiled softly. "I hope so."

"Wait a minute, stop the presses. Our resident fuck and runner sounds like he's after going steady!" exclaimed Token, raising his arms in semi-mock shock.

"I don't... fuck and run half as much as you say I do." Clyde was looking at Token, but Kevin could tell the sentence was directed at him. It wasn't exactly a surprise that Token called him that. Kevin knew all about Clyde's reputation, it was after all a big thing in their school.

"Would you like me to list all the girls?"

"NO!"

Token continued anyway. "There's such an array, you don't even have a type. Blondes, brunettes, tall, short, on top, und-"

Clyde shoved his hand over Token's mouth. "Shut up, dude. I have a clearer type than you think." But there was no way Token was finding out that type.

"Kelsi must be pretty important, or just possibly the best looking person around to have this effect on you," commented Craig as they began to walk towards their English class, this involved passing exactly where Kevin was stood.

Clyde felt too embarrassed to reply, he just muttered something along the lines of 'shut up' under his breath. On the way past Kevin, he purposefully bumped into him, slipping a small note into his hand.

"Watch where you're fucking going, Stoley," growled Craig, noticing the contact, but not the silent exchange.

"I think it's Donovan who needs to watch where he's going," retorted Kevin, slamming his locker and walking away, but clinging tightly to the note. He reached a safe difference and read it, a smile illuminating his face. 'Phone out of battery- want to come to mine tonight? X'

"Why do you dislike Kevin so much?" asked Clyde, at the door to their English class. He made it sound like just a passing question, but he was very concerned to know the answer, it didn't make sense what Kevin had done wrong, if anything. He knew Craig very well though, and holding a grudge was what he did best.

Craig shrugged. "I guess he's okay, it's just that, I'm just as smart and I get overlooked, because he's the perfect, gifted, straight A's boy."

"Well he doesn't get detentions like you do, plus he doesn't skip class..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. But I still get the teachers fucking good results."

"Then it's not his fault, it's the teachers'. Don't take it out on him."

Craig glared at Clyde. "Why do you care so much?"

Clyde raised his hands in defence, palms spread wide. "I just like to see people given a fair trail!"

Craig rolled his eyes. "Don't you mean trial?"

"You see, now who's being the smart-ass?"

Clyde grinned smugly at Craig, who glowered at him in response. Knocking Craig's chullo off his head to show the black hair, something he did often when he was looking to irritate his friend. Clyde quickly ran into the classroom, taking his seat. Craig flipped him off, standard reaction, and reluctantly followed.

Kevin tried to spend the morning focused on his studies, he really did. He came close to forgetting about him for a few seconds during P.E class, when he was almost wiped out by a dodgeball thrown by the temporarily furious Pip Pirrup, (dodgeball was how he took out his anger.) But after picking himself up off the floor, his thoughts immediately sprung back to the hazel-eyed, brown-haired, Jock, by the name of Clyde Donovan.

He didn't even care, he was that happy.

He had managed to hold a normal, as the two boys got, conversation with Bradley about an upcoming movie they wanted to see, but even the thought of a band of superheroes joining forces to save the world, hadn't kept Clyde out of his mind.

Kevin returned to the gym later that day, for a different reason. He made sure before he entered that every other member of the basketball team had left, it was incredibly lucky that Clyde often stayed behind to shoot solo hoops, otherwise Kevin's plan wouldn't have worked.

That would have been a shame.

It did work though, and Kevin watched from the door with wide eyes at the look of concentration on Clyde's face, as he lined up to take a shot, and then threw the ball, almost gracefully, into the air, sending it diving through the hoop, with hardly touching the sides at all. He definitely deserved to be captain, there was no disputing that. Clyde was dripping with dedication... literally.

"Ahhh there's the sweaty Jock, living up to his sweaty name in the sweaty gym."

Clyde's eyes shot to Kevin in shock. He didn't even attempt to wipe the beads of perspiration from his forehead, he just nodded. "Okay, you win. I'm a sweaty Jock." He dribbled the ball towards Kevin, stopping just short of hitting him. "What are you doing here?" he asked with pleasure.

"I took a chance."

Clyde looked concerned. "What if I hadn't been the only one left."

"I would have said I'd become a basketball prodigy overnight!"

"Want to prove it?" asked Clyde playfully, eyes glistening.

"I would, but..." Kevin held up his hands, which were heavily stained in paint. He had tried to wash it off, but acrylic was very difficult to get out, it took time.

Clyde stared at him with a bemused expression. "Your hands are covered in blue... paint is that?"

"Yeah I'm thinking about becoming a smurf, I just need the hat."

Clyde laughed. "And to shrink like five feet."

"Well I'm not giving up hope," pouted Kevin.

Clyde smiled, gazing into Kevin's also blue eyes. He dropped the basketball, sending it bouncing across the floor, the bounces getting steadily less and less, until it was left slowly rolling. He reached out his hand leisurely, and took Kevin's, the sweat from his skin instantly having an effect on the dried paint. "Never give up hope." He closed his eyes and bent his head down, lips melting onto Kevin's. Content in the knowledge that the other boy was still happy to kiss him, he parted their lips. Getting caught that close was the last thing either of them wanted.

"So why are your hands blue?" asked Clyde, still holding them.

"I was painting the ocean in art class, and I decided that to get the best texture, I should just use my hands."

"You're so out of your mind, dude."

Kevin licked his lips. "I know."

Unable to stop himself, Clyde stole another quick kiss, this one deeper and more desperate than the last. Seeing Kevin lick his lips had an effect on him that he couldn't explain.

"So you want to see me tonight?"

"Yes, if you, you know can." Clyde rubbed the back of his neck.

"So what, do you want to study again, on a Friday night?"

Clyde gave Kevin a confused look. "No, of course not."

"But you want to see me?"

"YES! I want to see you, for you, fool. And not just your amazing lips." He blushed. "I've been thinking about you all day actually. Thinking about last night, it was unexpected, but very... I can't even think of the word."

"Me neither, but I know what you mean. I never expected to well..." Kevin trailed off, unable to finish what he wanted to say. "I've been thinking about you all day as well."

They looked into each other's eyes, both wanting to ask the potentially disastrous question, the one that could scare the other away, or bring them even closer: 'Just what is going on here?' But neither of them did, instead Kevin agreed to hot foot it to Clyde's as soon as he could that night.

Clyde left the gym with faint blue stains on his hands, thankfully no one noticed, and he rushed into the shower, where the hot water soon washed away all traces.

"Clyde, there's a sort of Asian looking and kind of cute person here for you!" Clyde's sister looked Kevin up and down and smiled. "I'm Megan. I've never seen you before. It looks like Clyde is getting better taste in friends, rather than all those lunkheads."

Kevin blinked in bemusement. What could he say to that? "Well... thank you, Megan. I presume by lunkheads you mean the various players from the basketball team?"

Megan smirked. "How did you know?" She led Kevin into the front room, where Clyde was talking to his dad. Kevin smiled to himself as he remembered what had happened in that kitchen, only yesterday. "But I don't mind Token and Craig, especially not Craig, because he doesn't even play basketball, and he's so gorgeous. My brother used to be friends with a twitchy kid as well, Tweek, but he's not anymore."

Clyde looked over at his sister and frowned. "I'm still friends with Tweek, Megan. It's Craig that had the fall out, and then Tweek found better company with Kyle and Butters and people."

"Denting your reputation?"

"No that's not it! No one knows the reason him and Craig stopped talking, and Craig wouldn't like tell me, so I just forgot about it really." Clyde looked past his sister to Kevin, who was standing awkwardly in the doorway. "Hey, dude," he said grinning.

Kevin smiled. "Hi." He turned to Clyde's dad, who was standing with a coffee mug in his hand by the sink. "Hello again, Mr Donovan."

"Hello, Kevin. I've heard about my son's clumsy behaviour last night, surprised you weren't scared away. He may knock over something heavier than a boiling pan next time." Roger Donovan laughed. "In fact it's very likely. How he manages not to injure himself in basketball is beyond me."

"Did he tell you that he squeezed toothpaste all over his nose as well?"

Clyde's dad sighed. "That sounds like my son alright... we're so proud."

Clyde grunted in annoyance. "Need I remind you that your son is the captain of the basketball team and just got a B on his last test?"

"You know I'm ecstatic for you about both those things." Clyde's dad turned to Kevin. "Clyde told me you helped him prepare for that test?"

"Well... yes, I did, sir."

"That's extremely patient of you. I hope he gave you something worthwhile for your time." Kevin nodded, yes, he certainly did do that. "Just a quick question," continued Clyde's dad, "are you alright for dinner?"

"Yes, we're going to Taco Bell," said Clyde.

"Oh well there's a surprise," muttered Megan. She turned to Kevin. "Whether you like tacos or not is irrelevant, you'll end up having to eat them."

Clyde grinned. "Everyone likes tacos, the people who don't are obviously in the Nile."

Megan gave Clyde a look of exasperation and exhaustion, with what she considered his overwhelming stupidity. "Well, you know, it's hard to get tacos delivered to that part of Northern Africa."

Clyde didn't understand what she was trying to say. He pulled on Kevin's sleeve. "Come on, Kevin. Let's get away from these two loons."

Clyde began to drag Kevin by the arm. "Nice talking to you, Mr Donovan," said Kevin quickly.

"Well you're much politer than any of the others, happy to see you over here anytime."

"Kevin only lives about ten houses down, with the Stoley's because he's a Stoley, and their son and stuff... so we may be holding your word to that."

Kevin allowed himself to be led out of the kitchen and into the living room. The two boys talked and watched mindless television programs for a few hours. They found that the time passed very quickly as they asked each other question upon question. They had a curiosity to know everything there was to know, even the bad stuff. The chemistry between them did not go unnoticed by Megan, who watched reruns of Two and Half Men with them. She saw the brush of their hands against each other, and the blush that appeared on both of their faces. Unlike her brother, she wasn't an idiot.

Kevin really liked Clyde's family. He thought about how easy they were around each other, and how relaxed the atmosphere was. He looked at the family pictures hanging on the walls, particularly the ones featuring Betsy Donovan. It was clear that she was missing from the equation, and he could see the effect her death had. Roger Donovan looked older than he had. You got the sense that he was always tired. Clyde said his dad's date had gone well though, both he and his sister were really fine with this; they wanted to see their dad happy. They were a close family, the three of them, no pressure being anything they didn't want, they could just be themselves.

Kevin felt like crying at that point so he turned away from the holiday photo and agreed with Clyde's suggestion that they should go get something to eat.

Clyde was sat cross-legged on his bed, opposite Kevin, eating tacos, it was the way apparently the proper way of eating them (at least according to him they were.) He crossed his fingers surreptitiously behind his back and held his breath. He needed to know what was going on. They'd had such a lovely evening, he didn't want to spoil it, but he needed to know.

"Kevin, I was just kind of wondering what your, you know, thoughts were... about us?"

Kevin nearly choked on a piece of chicken in panic. "Well I'm not after anything, you don't need to attach strings!" he blurted out. He knew he couldn't expect anything else from Clyde; he could easily have anybody he wanted.

Clyde hung his head, trying, unsuccessfully, to hide the disappointed look on his face. He knew that Kevin wouldn't be interested; he could get someone much more on his intellectual and academic level, a really smart person, who can play duets on the violin with him. "Oh, right then."

Kevin's heart skipped a beat. "Unless of course you want to." He took a deep breath, tearing small strips off his taco wrapper. He knew the moment Clyde raised his head, and their eyes connected that he should just be honest. "Because I want to, I like you, Clyde. I have feelings for you, and if you want to then, yes, I want to. I can't imagine why you'd want to though."

"What do you want to do?" asked Clyde, unsure of whether he'd heard Kevin correctly or not.

"I want to... I want you. I think last night confirmed my feelings for you." Kevin usually sounded confident in what he was saying, but he stumbled as he exposed his feelings to Clyde. "I've never really felt anything for anyone before. I've always considered people only as friends. I've not bothered or wondered why I haven't had f-feelings for anyone. And then you started talking to me! And suddenly I was feeling them... and it's all so fast, and it's confusing, and it's messy, but I do- I really like you. You're something special, and not for the reasons everyone else thinks you are."

Was cloud nine real? Because that's where Clyde was.

He beamed, his hazel eyes showing all the joy he felt. "I'm so glad you're feeling that way, because I am too. Dude, I've never wanted to be in a relationship with someone before, but you like come along with your covalent bonds, head massages and Oreo's, and suddenly you're all I can think about. I have to concentrate hard not to grab you and kiss you in front of everyone! So I guess what I'm asking is, would you like to be in a relationship with me?"

Surely Kevin was dreaming. "You want us to go steady, be exclusive, and not see other people?"

"Aren't they like all the same thing? But yeah, I would, if you can stand the confusion and how hard it may be." Clyde blushed, something that seemed to happen often. "Unless you don't want to that is."

"Well Clyde, looks like you have a boyfriend. And I have a boyfriend... we both have boyfriends. I have to ask, because I'm a little confused. Are you gay?"

"Yes."

"But, the girls?"

"Oh the ones I slept with?" Clyde rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, terrible I know, but I didn't have any feelings for them. Actually the only other crush I've ever had, was on Kenny." He cringed. "But I feel nothing for that pervy guy at all now. I think any psychiatrist would say I slept with all those girls because I was overcomp... overcompulating."

"Overcompensating?"

"Yeah that's the one."

Kevin raised his eyebrow. "Were you in the Nile?"

Clyde nodded his head, again oblivious to his mistake. "I think I was. So what about you, dude? Are you gay?"

"Like I said, I never really thought about it until a week ago... and it's a dangerous thought. We are going to have to keep this top-secret."

Clyde nodded. "It wouldn't be good, for either of us if people found out. Some of them are pretty homophobic, and we get close in basketball, hell we even shower together. But I've never looked at any of them like that, and I wouldn't. Not that the... ermm, reassurance would matter to them one bit if they found out, they'd still feel completely uncomfortable and ruin everything." Clyde couldn't take a big chance like that, not with his future career hanging in the balance. Not many basketball players are openly gay, and the likelihood of still getting his scholarship would be very small.

"And I can't risk my parents finding out. My dad may be alright with it, but not my mom."

"Why?"

"Even though my dad was raised in China, he was brought up, by my granddad, with Western views. But my mom wasn't. In the community she was in there, romance isn't important. It's all about responsibility to the family and parents. Spontaneous expressions of love are particularly not considered appropriate. She is less strict about me having a romantic relationship than that though; they want me to find a girl who makes me happy. As long as she's smart, respectful, and can guarantee marriage... and children." Kevin heaved a sigh. "Yep, I'm screwed."

"That's like... the opposite of me," said Clyde quietly.

"No it isn't, Clyde. You're really respectful, and loving, and kind."

"But I'm not smart, or a girl and I definitely can't guarantee children. I don't want to make your life hard, Kevin."

"You'd make it harder if you weren't in it, because then I'd be miserable. I'm not losing this. I've never felt so wanted... apart from by the Chess Club when we're in a tournament."

Clyde pouted and leapt forward, tackling Kevin down, into a massive hug. "Well the Chess Club is just going to have to share you."

Kevin cried out in shock, and then wrapped his arms around Clyde's back, nestling his chin into the crook of Clyde's neck. He'd been waiting all night for this contact. "Well the basketball team is going to have to share you, even if they don't know they're doing it."

Overcome with happiness, Clyde smacked their lips together. Who the hell needed a captain anyway?

A/N: The paint thing... that's what I did in art class, but I was painting the ocean red, and somewhere along the lines I cut my finger, so yeah I was painting it with blood... hmmm

Not actually much Clyde and Kevin physical action in here, but I couldn't make the chapter any longer! :L

Thank you for the reviews, they are so greatly appreciated, and give me the motivation I need to supply you with Stolovanyness.