I loved reading all of your reviews last chapter! Some of you are oh so sharp. Parts of Wade's 'secret' have been scattered throughout this story and you didn't miss them. You're about to learn it all... I also really loved your thoughts on the scene between Earl and his granddaughter. Sadly, I can write that from first hand experience having lost my grandpa over the summer and dealt with the hospice nurses and the like.
Remember that I named Wade's mom 'Mary Ellen' before we knew her actual name. And if you didn't know it already, I'm a Tennessee graduate and am NOT a fan of the Crimson Tide. ;) Song inspiration for this chapter is "Broken Bottles" by Sons of Bill.
THINGS I OWN: A sewing machine that I have no idea how to use. THINGS I DON'T OWN: Hart of Dixie
"I hope this weather ain't any indication of what we should expect for summer," Roger Miller said as Wade topped off his glass of sweet tea.
"Ain't that the truth?" Wade replied. "Hotter than a squirrel in a wool sock out there and it ain't even April."
"According to J.J. Reynolds, we're in for a big change in a few days," Dash DeWitt said, inviting himself into the conversation from the next table over. "Did you see his latest weather predictions in the paper? Says a cold front will blow in day after tomorrow. And you all know what that means."
"Twisters," Roger said seriously. "Supposed to be a right big outbreak from what I've heard."
"I saw somethin' 'bout that on the news this mornin,'" Wade said. "Probably a good time to dig out the candles, bottle up some water and put fresh batteries in the weather radio. Springtime in the South and all."
"Not a bad idea," Dash agreed. "I'm gonna blog about that – good reminder to my readers to keep an eye on the sky and be storm ready." Wade refrained from rolling his eyes at Dash borrowing the local news channel's severe weather tagline.
"I'm supposed to head out on a fishing trip tomorrow but I might should reconsider," Roger said. "I don't want to leave the wife home alone with the boys. They give her a run for her money on a good day. Last thing she needs is to be corralling all four of them while we have our own version of that Twister movie playing out."
"Y'all do me a favor and don't mention tornadoes to the Doc," Wade said. "She's right scared of storms. Give her two days to fret about tornadoes dropping out of the sky and none of us will be able to stand her."
"Well she's going to find out when she reads my blog," Dash said. Wade grinned.
"Doubt we'll have to worry 'bout that," he said, knowing few people in the town actually read Dash's blog, despite what he liked to think. "She'll find out soon enough with all the news she watches and how everyone talks 'round here. Might as well let her live in peace for as long as we can."
"I'm sure you'll look out for her," Roger said with a knowing grin.
"Always." Wade winked at the pair before walking away to take another order.
He had a nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach about the change in the weather. Predicting a tornado was almost impossible until it was falling out of the sky but it sounded like conditions would be favorable and that made him nervous. A myriad of things coursed through his mind as he brought re-filled drinks and jotted down a burger order – would his father's house be able to withstand a severe weather outbreak? Did Lavon have his storm cellar stocked? Did Zoe know what to do when a tornado hit? He started making a mental list of what he needed to do before the weather shifted and as it got longer, started jotting it down on a napkin. He heard the bell over the door chime, signaling another customer, but as it was the lunchtime rush, he didn't bother to look up.
"Wade?" came his sister's voice.
"Hey, Mere," he said. He finished writing 'buy Zoe flashlights' before he looked up. The color drained from his face in surprise. There, standing before him, was Earl. "Dad?"
"He wanted to come," Meredith said softly, understanding Wade's surprise. She helped him onto a stool in front of Wade as Wade gathered himself. Earl hadn't set so much as toe inside the place since the day their mother died. The hush that had fallen over the lunch patrons showed Wade wasn't the only one surprised to see him. Earl, looking weak, squirmed uncomfortable on his seat.
"Thought it was high time I came and saw what you did with the place," he said quietly.
"Shouldn't you be restin'?" Wade asked. Earl shook his head.
"Plenty time for that when I'm dead, ain't it?"
"Daddy!" Meredith exclaimed. "Don't talk like that."
"Hush, girl," Earl chastised. "I ain't no fool. I know I'm a dyin.' Doc ain't frettin' over me for no good reason. And them hospice people ain't comin' to the house for their health neither." Wade swallowed the lump that formed in his throat any time he thought of the hospice nurses. They were sweet, compassionate, middle-aged women, one who stayed overnight and another who was with them for much of the day. They'd been coming for a week now and as much as Wade liked them, their presence did nothing to make it easier to accept that his time with his father was coming to an end.
"Where is Hattie anyhow?" Wade asked, referring to the nurse that was with them during daytime hours.
"Stayed at the house," Meredith answered. "She thought it'd be nice for us to get out of the house for a little bit – but we promised to be back within two hours."
"I'll go back when I want to go back," Earl said stubbornly. Meredith rolled her eyes and Wade chuckled.
"What can I get for you, Dad?" he asked.
"How 'bout a glass of sweet tea?" Earl asked. Meredith opened her mouth to protest but Earl beat her to the punch. "Nothin' from you, missy. I'm 'bout sick of you tellin' me what I can and can't eat and drink. If I'm goin' out, I'm goin' out with a full belly."
"You're incorrigible," she retorted.
"Don't know what that means but I reckon it's an insult," Earl said as he took the glass of tea from Wade.
"I'm going to the Dixie Stop to pick up a few things," Meredith announced. "Wade, you're in charge of him." She turned on her heel and headed out the door before either of them had a chance to respond.
"Piece of work, that girl," Earl muttered.
"She means well. Just a little high strung is all," Wade answered. "Want somethin' to eat?"
"Whatcha got?"
"Well… Most all of Momma's old recipes," he answered, watching Earl carefully. As he suspected he would, Earl tensed up at the mention of his wife. "Got a few other things we've added to the menu. Got some good, fresh catfish and chicken and dumblin's are the special today."
"Got any turkey hash? Spread over a couple slices of toast?"
"I'll see what I can do," Wade said. He left Earl at the counter and went back to his line cook. Turkey hash was a special, usually on Wednesdays, but if his dad wanted turkey hash, Wade would make sure he got it. He explained to his cook who was more than happy to help him out. When he returned, Earl was sitting with his back to the bar, taking in the place. Wade was surprised to see no one talking to him, but he figured Bluebell knew Earl and his story well enough to know to give him his space for the time being.
"Sure has changed," he said when he sensed Wade come up behind him and lean on the bar. "Your momma used to have a bunch of copper molds hanging on that wall yonder. And it was all pink and yellow. Some mint too. Pastels. Damn pastels everywhere. Looked like an Easter egg had exploded in here."
"I've still got those molds," Wade told him. "They're in a box on a shelf in the back. Didn't make sense to keep 'em up when I took over and decided to make it into a bar, but I couldn't get rid of 'em neither."
"She had a cold case just over there," Earl said, pointing to where the jukebox was now. "It was always full of salads – chicken salad, tater salad, macaroni salad, broccoli salad. Made it all fresh every day. Never did know how she found the time, takin' care of you kids and me like she did."
"The bakery case was right over here," Wade said, pointing to a place that was now part of the bar. "I learned how to cook from her but I never did get good at bakin' the way she did."
"Can that Zoe of yours cook?" Earl asked, surprising Wade with the change in subject as he slowly turned himself so he was sitting back at the bar. Wade chuckled.
"That girl can't boil water. I done saved her in the kitchen more than once. That's why she's always eatin' here. Reckon she likes the bartender too."
"I reckon she does," Earl agreed. He took a deep breath, wincing as he did so.
"You alright?" Wade asked. Earl nodded but didn't answer. He took another long look around the place then looked at Wade.
"You done real good," he said. "I know I ain't never told you that, but you did. I'm real proud of you." Wade looked down at the bar, not sure how to respond. He didn't do emotions well as it was but when it was with his father, it went to a whole other level of uncomfortable. "I was mad as hellfire when I heard you was changin' the place into a bar. Your momma worked so hard on her restaurant and it meant so much to her. Took me a long time to realize it was the only way to keep it goin' and in the family."
"I remember that night," Wade said quietly. "I had to sing you down from the old fire station. That was the first time you started the rooftop business." Earl looked ashamed.
"I'm sorry," he said. "For a lot of things, but for the singin' especially. Humiliated us both." Wade nodded in agreement but didn't say anything further. "Anyway, I just wanted to see the place before…" he trailed off but they both knew how the sentence ended. "You did real good. Your momma would've been proud too." Wade was searching for a way to reply when the cook came out and set a plate of piping hot turkey has in front of Earl.
"I took the liberty of adding a side of catfish," he said. "You don't want to miss out on that stuff, Mr. Kinsella. It is goo-ood."
"Thank you," Earl replied. He picked up his fork with a shaky hand.
"Thanks," Wade added. He'd be sure to put a little something extra in the cook's check that week. He waited while Earl chewed his first bite. "Well?"
"Not as good as your momma's, but nothin' else can beat it." Wade chuckled.
"Nothin' here will ever be good as Momma's," he agreed. He saw a couple of Earl's old high school friends approaching. "You sit here and enjoy your meal, visit with your buddies," he told his dad. "I'm gonna get back to work."
Earl smiled and nodded at Wade. There was a tear in his eye, but it disappeared just as quickly as it came as he turned to greet his old friends.
Zoe signed her name with a flourish.
"Let it be known that old man Jackson didn't fool me this time," she announced to Addie as she passed her his chart to file. "Not only did I know he memorized the eye chart, I bought a new one – one with numbers instead of letters. He didn't know what to do with himself."
"Mighty proud of yourself for fooling an old man," Addie said, giving Zoe a pointed look at she sat the chart aside.
"Don't give me that look. That man took full advantage of me on my first day in Bluebell. If he thought I was gonna forget that, he's got another thing coming." Addie shook her head in amusement.
"Zoe! There you are!" Brick rounded the corner from his exam room looking rushed. "Can you head over to the high school? The whole football team has a nasty case of athlete's foot and its keeping them from practicing well. It'd be easier for you just to make a house call, if you will, rather than get all them here. And I've already told the coach one of us would be along to take care of it." Zoe frowned.
"You want me to go treat a bunch of teenage boys' stinky feet? Because they can't practice well? It's not even football season!"
"It's spring practice," Brick said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "They've got the annual spring game coming up this weekend. And I know it's just a scrimmage between the offense and defense, but it's a big deal around here and the whole town will be there to watch. There's even going to be college scouts there. I'd do it myself but I've got Mr. Banton waiting with what looks like a pretty bad case of strep throat and Walt Jefferson is coming in for a physical in a half hour."
"You realize you're practically begging, right?" Zoe asked.
"I am not begging," Brick said, too proud to admit he'd overbooked himself. "Now can you go?" Zoe did a mental recount of her afternoon schedule. She had a 3:00 appointment and another a half hour later but barring a walk in patient, she was relatively free.
"Fine," she relented. "But you owe me. Teenage boys are the worst."
"Thank you," Brick said. "Try and not priss around too much while you're there. Teenage boys are impressionable and, well, that dress is a little short." Zoe scoffed as Brick hurried away.
"He's unbelievable," she told Addie. "I'm going to go get my bag. Can you get me…."
"A whole case of foot spray from the supply closet?" Addie guessed. She set a box on the counter. "Brick told me he was going to send you. I figured I'd do my part."
"Aren't you a saint?" Zoe asked, except she half meant it. She grabbed a snack from Brick's stash in his office figuring it was the least he could do, then got her bag, collected her foot spray and headed out the door. She made a spectacular attempt to juggle her things while eating a pack of crackers. She'd hoped to make a late lunch at the Rammer Jammer, if for no other reason than to see Wade for a few minutes, but with all the time she was spending taking care of Earl, she had to see other patients when she could. And with Wade understandably spending so much time with his father, she missed him.
An hour later, she passed out the last can of foot spray and issued one last stern warning for the team to use it as instructed. Feeling like she desperately needed a shower after being in a boys' locker room for nearly an hour, she wandered through the high school, trying to find the exit. The dismissal bell had just rang and the halls were swarmed with students rushing out the door.
"Zoe!" Zoe stopped and allowed Rose and her friend Tonya to catch up. "What are you doing here?"
"Oh you know, just hanging out with the football team," she answered.
"Treating their foot fungus, I hope," Tonya said, making a face. "My brother's feet are disgusting."
"They should be on the mend soon," Zoe assured the girl. "But I wouldn't accidently wear any of his socks for a while." She noticed the girls were loaded down with all sorts of paper, scissors and what looked like metallic stars. "What's all that?"
"We're changing out the bulletin board in the main entrance to advertise the Spring Fling," Rose said excitedly. "This year's them is 'Under the Stars.' We're turning the gym into a planetarium. How cool is that?"
"Very," Zoe answered. In her mind, she saw visions of slowly rotating disco balls and plastic stars and moons hanging from the rafters while teenagers danced too close. She walked with them towards the entrance, half listening as that chattered on about who they hoped asked them and what they should wear, promising she'd take them dress shopping in Mobile without realizing what she was agreeing to. Just as she was about to leave them to their bulletin board, a massive trophy case across the entrance caught her eye. She wandered over to it, sure it would be full of Lavon's achievements. Sure enough, there he was, his career with Bluebell High School as well as shots from his college and pro days spanning much of the trophy case. Someone named Leon Mercy had been a track star in his day, it seemed and a Roger Warrick had been an all-state basketball player. Next to a team photo with him and a state championship trophy front and center though, was a photo that made her gasp in surprise.
"Wade played football?" she asked, staring at a photo of a younger Wade in his Big Blue uniform. His smile and eyes hadn't changed at all, but his hair was longer in the photo, shaggy and dripping with sweat. There were more photos of him, plaques with his name on them, a state championship trophy next to a framed newspaper clipping with the headline 'Kinsella Leads Big Blue To First State Title In Five Years.'
Rose and Tonya appeared on either side of her as though they'd been summoned.
"Duh," Rose said. "He was like, the star quarterback. He's a legend. Fredrick Dean – and every quarterback since then – only wish they could be as good as he was." Zoe shook her head.
"He hates football," she said, thinking back to all the times she'd been wrapped up in a football game, both on TV and at the high school, yelling and cheering alongside Lavon while Wade had been uninterested, at best, and certainly never present in the Bluebell High stands. Yet she could also remember the occasional moment when Wade would make a comment about a football game, share a little nugget of knowledge about a player or a state he'd 'overheard.' Something didn't add up but she'd never realized it until now.
"No he doesn't," Tonya argued. "Or, well, maybe he does, seeing as he's like, the only person in Bluebell who doesn't come to games. He was big time. He was even better than Lavon Hayes. My daddy says he nearly caused a riot when he announced he'd be going to Tennessee in the fall. Alabama wanted him bad and he signed with the enemy."
"Wait," Zoe sputtered, finally taking her eyes off the trophy case. "Wade went to college?"
"Sort of," Rose said with a shrug. "The way my uncle tells it, he graduated high school early and enrolled in Tennessee for the spring semester but he never went back after summer break."
"Why?" Zoe pressed, wondering why he'd never mentioned it to her, how she'd somehow not known he was a big football star. She'd bought his excuse about the Rammer Jammer, how he'd assumed she'd known he owned it since everyone else in town knew, but he wasn't going to get off as easy with this one.
"Daddy said that he… Ow!" Rose elbowed Tonya, shutting her up. Zoe raised an eyebrow.
"Daddy said what?" she pressed, eyeing the girls.
"You should probably talk to Wade about that," Rose said, looking nervous. "I mean, we're young. We don't know the details…" Tonya caught on and nodded in agreement.
"Yeah, it's not like we were in high school when he was or anything. We could be entirely wrong. You know how people talk around here…" Tonya gave Zoe an innocent smile.
"Oh we're going to talk," Zoe said, feeling herself growing angry. She glanced at her watch. "I've got to go. I've got a patient waiting on me." She told the girls goodbye and left the school. As she hurried toward the practice, she went over what Rose and Tonya told her. It didn't make any sense. Wade, she decided, had a lot of explaining to do.
Several hours later, she'd accepted the fact getting to the bottom of Wade's high school glory days were going to have to wait at least until the morning. She'd gotten behind schedule by dillydallying at the high school and had then taken a walk-in patient once she'd finished with her appointments. By the time she was done stitching up Jacob Mobley, Wade had texted her to let her know he was leaving the Rammer Jammer and going out to Earl's.
To occupy herself, she climbed the stairs to Harley's apartment. She'd neglected her task of cleaning the place out lately, too consumed with Earl, Wade and the practice to fit in much else. She flipped on several lights, opened a couple of windows to let in some slightly cooler air into the stuffy and hot space and turned on the portable radio she'd fished out and put new batteries in before she went to work.
She decided to tackle Harley's study. She'd been keeping the room as a sort of prize. It was full of old medical textbooks, patient files of those who had likely passed if they were in Harley's possession instead of filed in the practice below, and, what really had piqued her curiosity, several boxes of what a peek told her contained photos, newspaper clippings and who knew what else. She'd been saving the room with the intentions of digging through it last, sure it held all sorts of information about not only Harley but Bluebell. Now, she felt drawn to it, sure it held town secrets, much like the one she'd learned about Wade. She picked up one of the boxes and sat down in the middle of the floor.
As she'd expected, the box was full of clippings and moments from and about Bluebell's residents. There were Christmas and birthday cards, several cards of thanks from patients. There were articles from the newspaper about Harley being named Man of the Year, Lavon winning mayor, Founders Day Parades and Gumbo cook-offs. There were also birth announcements, many of the names Zoe recognized. She assumed they were delivered by Harley. She giggled a bit when, midway through a second box, she found Rose's birth announcement along with a note from her parents. She set it aside, sure Rose would love to have it.
At the bottom of the box, with just a few pieces and a couple of photos left, she picked up a small folded pamphlet. When she turned it over, she realized it was a service folder. Her heart skipped a beat when she read the name below the photo of praying hands – Mary Ellen Marks Kinsella. Wade's mother. She opened the service folder and inside, found an obituary folded in half. She read the Bible verse and information about Mary Ellen's memorial service before she unfolded the obituary.
She realized then, as she looked at the black and white picture at the top of the long column of memorium, that she'd never seen a photo of Wade's mother. Wade, it turned out, looked more like Earl but he had his mother's eyes. Meredith, however, was her mother's spitting image. She read the obituary though and then read it again, taking in every word. Mary Ellen had not only been a wife, mother, sister, daughter and owner of Bluebell's favorite restaurant, she'd also been a part of the Memory Matrons, an officer in the Junior League and a Belle. She could only imagine how drastically Wade's life had changed after her passing. She placed it with Rose's birth announcement to give it to Wade later.
It was halfway into the third box – and nearing ten o'clock – when she found the first article about Wade's football career. It was a long piece, a feature article written the day after he'd signed to play for Tennessee. Clean-shaven, wearing a suit, and his floppy hair combed to the side, he stood between his sister and J.J. Reynolds, who, to Zoe's surprise, had been his football coach, wearing a Tennessee hat and tie and grinning broadly. The article recited all of Wade's school accomplishments and included quotes from him on how much he was looking forward to playing for Tennessee, why Phil Fulmer had managed to sway him from the Alabama Crimson Tide and his decision to leave high school a semester early to enroll in UT for the spring semester.
It wasn't the only article. As she continued to dig through the box, she found more, most of them documenting his play in the previous night's game. It turned out he'd been a bit of an all-arounder, also playing baseball well enough to be named to the all-region team. She couldn't believe he'd never told her any of this, even when they'd talked about their high school days. Her stories were usually about her getting into trouble with Gigi while his usually involved George and Lemon. She'd told him about all of her extracurriculars and he'd told her all the places he used to sneak around with girls. Not once had he mentioned he'd been a regular town hero.
As midnight approached, Zoe reached the bottom of a fourth box. She yawned and stretched, realizing for the first time that her muscles were protesting from sitting cross-legged on the floor for so long. Her stomach growled loudly and a trip to the bathroom became emergent. She knew Wade was staying at Earl's that night and it was too late for her to consider walking home. She went down to the practice, dug up a blanket and pillow, then returned to Harley's apartment. She made herself a bed on the couch and fell asleep thinking over how she'd approach Wade in the morning.
It was past the peak of the breakfast crowd by the time Zoe made it to the Rammer Jammer. She'd woke up early, headed to the plantation to shower and get ready for the day and had breakfast with Lavon before searching out Wade. She'd tried to wheedle information out of Lavon but he'd locked up tight, refusing to share anything with her she didn't already know. She found Wade crowded over his desk, sifting through paperwork.
"Hey, you," he said, a grin coming easily as she stepped into his office. He stood quickly and had her in his arms before she knew what had happened.
"Hey," she replied just before he kissed her.
"I missed you," he whispered between kisses. She smiled despite being upset with him.
"I missed you," she replied, kissing him again before she pulled away. "How was Earl this morning?"
"'Bout the same," he answered. "Hattie's there with him now. I hung out until she came to take over for Margaret so I got a little bit of a late start." He ran a hand through his hair, letting Zoe in on how weary he felt, something he did a good job of hiding from most everyone else. "I'm not sure how I'm gonna get everything done around here and help take care of him too. Meredith's gone home to Mobile for a few days – she needs to spend some time with her husband and kids after being here for the last couple of days. I told Lavon I'd clean up the gardens, get 'em ready for spring, sometime this week but I just don't know…"
"Hey, don't worry about Lavon," Zoe said. "He'll understand. Some Spring Fling dance is coming up at the high school – every teen boy in Bluebell will be looking for a way to earn some extra cash to take their date to Fancy's before feeling them up on the dance floor. I'm sure a couple of them will be more than happy to help him out."
"I know," Wade said, settling back into his desk chair. Zoe took one of the ones across from him. "It's just – a lot to take in." Zoe nodded in agreement, second-guessing her earlier stance on demanding to know why Wade had never told her about football and Tennessee along with finding out why he'd dropped out. He had enough on his mind right now.
"Can I help with anything?" she asked instead. Wade shrugged.
"Maybe tell me what's up with you?" he asked. "I got the impression you were upset with me. You texts yesterday were a little – short." Zoe frowned. Did he really know her that well? Could he really know she was upset with him because she'd sent him one-word responses instead of her usual more colorful replies? How did he know she wasn't just busy? She cursed his ability to read people, especially her, so well.
"Upset? Me? No," she said, trying to play it off. "I was just really busy. I had a couple physicals in the morning, another one in the afternoon… Then I went to the high school, treated the football team for athlete's foot, had a couple more appointments, Jacob Mobley cut his hand… It was just a really busy day. No one is upset. Least of all me. I'm not upset at all." She silently kicked herself. She couldn't play coy to save her life. Wade raised an eyebrow.
"You sure?" he asked. "'Cause I ain't buyin' what you're sellin,' Doc."
"It's nothing," Zoe said, shaking her head. "Just something silly that's not important in the grand scheme of things. Lavon said Earl came to the Rammer Jammer yesterday for the first time since your mom died? How was that?"
"Weird," Wade answered. "It was weird. Now don't change the subject. What's this silly, not important thing?" Zoe knew she didn't stand a chance when she locked eyes with him. He could see right through her, had been able to since day one. She sighed.
"Why didn't you tell me you were a local football hero?" she asked. "While I was at the high school yesterday, I was looking at the trophy case at all of Lavon's stuff and found out you were a star yourself." She saw Wade start to look uncomfortable but pressed on. "Rose and Tonya told me how you got a scholarship to play for Tennessee and then I found all sorts of articles about your playing days when I was going through some of Harley's things last night…. Why didn't you tell me? And why did you drop out of college?"
Wade didn't answer right away. Zoe waited, holding his gaze with her own, willing him to tell her the truth. Finally, he spoke.
"It was a long time ago," he said. "I was just doing what every high school boy around here does – playing football. I just happened to be better at it than most, that's all."
"That's not all," Zoe argued. "You had a scholarship to play for Tennessee and offers from Alabama, Florida, LSU – just about every school in the SEC as well as a few outside of it. You left high school early to enroll in UT. You even played during their Spring Orange and White game. Completed 10 of 14 passes for 112 yards, if I remember correctly. Then you quit. Why?"
"I had responsibilities here," Wade told her. "Earl, this place. I couldn't stay in Knoxville when everything here was falling apart." Zoe wasn't sure how, but she instinctively knew there was more. Against her better judgment, she pressed on.
"There's more to the story," she told him. "You're not telling me something."
"Nothin' to tell," Wade shot back too quickly. Zoe could see him tensing up in his chair, a sign that she was right on the money.
"There is," she insisted. "Wade, don't lie to me. Just tell me the truth. I'm sure Earl and this place and everything that happened with your family after your mom's death had a lot to do with it. But I know you and I know you're not telling me something. Tonya was going to tell what happened but Rose elbowed her to shut her up. Lavon wouldn't tell me anything either. So what's this big secret you're so intent on keeping?"
"Zoe, just drop it, okay?" Wade asked. "I played football. Won some championships, broke some records, got a scholarship to play at Tennessee. I tried it and it didn't work out. Now I'm here. End of story."
"Wade…
"Zoe, stop!" Wade snapped. Zoe, taken back by his tone, bit back what she was going to say. "Look, what happened back then is in the past – 12 years in the past to be exact. It doesn't matter. All that matters is what's happened since you got to town. So don't worry about why I didn't end up putting on a orange uniform every Saturday come fall."
Even as he spoke, Zoe could hear the regret laced in his words. Something had happened that had drastically altered Wade's path in life, something besides his mother's death. He was determined not to let her know what.
"Wade, just tell me," she said carefully. "Whatever it is…"
"I don't talk about it," he said firmly. "It doesn't matter."
"But it does!"
"Why?" Wade wanted to know. "Why does something that happened forever ago matter so much to you?"
"Everyone I've ever cared about has lied to me," Zoe told him, looking him square in the eye. "My mom lied to me my entire life about who my father was. My dad lied to me about everything from the fact that he wasn't my father to why he didn't make it to my school play. Even Harley lied to me, never telling me that he was my father in any of those postcards he sent. Now you're lying to me. I'm giving you the chance to be honest with me. And you're not taking it."
Wade could hear the hurt surfacing in her voice. She was shutting down right in front of him, no longer her bossy, sassy, independent self but letting the part of her that had been hurt by others, the part she worked so hard to get past, peek through her tough exterior. All the warnings he'd gotten from George and Lavon to tell Zoe the truth months ago echoed in his head. He was left with two options – tell her everything or keep it to himself. Either way, the outcome wasn't going to be pretty. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.
"Can we talk this evening?" he asked. "It's a long story and I've got to get back to work. It's my turn to stay with Earl so maybe you can come out there?" He waited for what felt like an eternity for Zoe to nod.
"I'll head out there after work," she said softly. "I want to check on Earl anyway." She stood as did Wade. "I should probably get back to the practice." Wade rounded the desk and reached for her. He was half shocked when she actually let him pull her into a hug.
"Just promise me you'll listen to everything I have to say," he whispered, holding on tighter than he normally would have. He felt Zoe squeeze tighter in return, her face buried in his shirt.
"If you promise to tell me the truth."
"It's a deal," he said. He pulled away enough to kiss her, hoping it told her everything he wanted to. She left then, leaving him alone in his office. He sat down on his desk and ran a hand through his hair. He already felt like he'd lost her.
The weight in his stomach grew steadily heavier as he sat on the back steps of his childhood home, waiting for Zoe to wrap up with Earl. It hadn't taken long for Earl to comment on the tension between the two, so thick a knife would have a hard time cutting through it. He hadn't talked about any of what he was about to tell Zoe in so long. She didn't have a clue as to what she was asking him. But even more, he was terrified. He knew it wasn't going to end well. Visions of Zoe walking away had plagued him all day. He'd gone as far as confide in George Tucker who had basically said 'I told you so.' He had, but Wade hadn't appreciated his lack of support. He was contemplating how he could rig Lavon's hybrid Zoe had driven out to Earl's to not start and thereby keep her from leaving after he told her everything when she walked through the screen door.
"How's he doin,' Doc?" Wade asked as Zoe sat down beside him.
"As well as can be expected," she answered. Wade noted the space between them. He could reach over and touch her, but she still seemed so far away. "His pain is under control and his appetite is still decent. So that's something." Wade just nodded. Zoe waited, ready to hear whatever he had to say. She'd spent the entire afternoon imagining one scenario after another. She was tired of dreaming things up. She wanted to know what he was hiding.
"I reckon you want to know why I came back from Tennessee," Wade finally said. Zoe only nodded. Wade took a deep breath. "Just, listen, okay? It's a long story and to be honest, it's real hard for me to tell."
"I'll listen," Zoe promised. Wade nodded, bracing himself.
"Okay. So you know about the football. I'd played football my entire life. After Momma died, it was the one thing that stayed the same. Daddy won't in the stands cheerin' me on no more but I was still playin.' I found comfort in the grass and dirt. It was the one thing in my world that still made sense. I made the varsity team my sophomore year and two games in, I got named starter and never looked back.
"That was the same year I started datin' Tansy. She was the most popular girl in school. Cheerleading captain, all that. It was just like in the movies. Even Lemon wanted to be her and all the guys wanted to date her. And I was just crazy about her." He paused and watched Zoe squirm. He knew he was making her uncomfortable. He also knew she was about get a lot more uncomfortable. He continued.
"We had big plans, me and Tansy. I was gonna go play football for a big SEC school and she was gonna go to beauty school and open her own salon. Might not seem like a big career choice, but it's all she ever wanted to do. Lookin' back, we were just young and dumb and thought we could take on the world but then, in the moment, we really believed we'd make it. We were in love and we were gonna do the long distance thing and when I graduated, I'd get drafted to the NFL and we'd get married, live happily ever after.
"I left high school early – hard to believe now that I had enough credits to graduate early, ain't it? I enrolled at UT so I could be there for spring practice, start learning the playbook and working out with the team. Man, Zoe, it was everythin' I dreamed it would be. There were frat parties and just because I played football, I got a free pass on just about everything. I loved it up there. I missed Tansy and my friends but I was makin' new ones, gettin' a chance to get out of here, make something of myself.
"Tansy took my bein' away pretty hard though. Her parents were always fightin' and she'd call me cryin' since she couldn't run over to my place like she used to. I came home for Spring Break and damn, it was so good to see her again. We spent the whole week together – she skipped out on the whole week of school, got in a hell of a lot of trouble. Then I went back to Knoxville.
"She stopped takin' my calls a few weeks later, got real distant. Then finals came and I was tryin' to study and do well on those. I had a couple weeks before the summer session I was enrolled in started up so when I finished my last exam, I came back to Bluebell." Wade paused and summoned up his courage.
"Long story short, after a lot of calls and sittin' around her place tryin' to get her to talk to me, I found out she was pregnant." He heard the sharp intake of breath that came from Zoe. He reached over and took her hand. This was the part he was dreading.
"I was young and dumb," he said again. "Meredith did her damnedest to talk some sense into me but I didn't want to hear nothin' she had to say. Tansy and I… Well, we went down to New Orleans, caught us a shrimp boat and got married."
"Married?" Zoe shrieked, interrupting Wade. "You were married? How did you not tell me you were married?"
"She was pregnant," Wade explained. He still had Zoe's hand and held it tighter. "I loved her. Gettin' married just made the most sense. And since I was about to have a kid to support, I couldn't be off playin' football. I needed a job, needed to make some money. That's how I ended up working back at Momma's restaurant.
"At first, it was great. We rented this little shack of a house not too far from here – it's gone now, storm took care of it several years back – and I worked as much as I could while she did odd jobs, picking up extra cash here and there. But real life started catchin' up with us pretty quick and we started fightin' a lot. Money was tight and bills won't gettin' paid.
"One night, we had a big fight – I was mad 'cause she spent money on a manicure when we needed it for food and rent and she was mad 'cause we didn't have the money to spend on things like manicures. I'd started resentin' her since she was the reason I gave up football and a college education, my chance to get out of Bluebell. The fight just got worse and worse and finally she left to go stay at her Momma's house.
"Sometime late that night her brother showed up on my doorstep. We didn't have cell phones back then and the land line had been turned off for nonpayment. They'd had to rush her to the hospital. She, well, she um…" Wade struggled to continue. "She um, lost the baby."
"Wade…" Zoe whispered. She'd had a feeling that was how the story would climax. She knew Wade too well to know that he didn't have a child out there somewhere that he wasn't involved with.
"The doctors said it was nothin' we did, that things like that just happened sometimes. And Tansy hadn't been feelin' good, but I still felt awfully guilty. So did she. We tried to make things work between us. She went into this deep depression though and nothin' I said or did would help. I hardly recognized her. The harder I tried, the worse things got. I started openly resentin' her and regrettin' my decision to leave UT. The way I saw it, she cost me my future. Things finally boiled over and we went our separate ways. I ain't really seen or talked to her much since. Just as well, I suppose."
Silence fell between the two. Wade kept Zoe's hand in his, using her silence as time to pull himself together. He still felt a lot of pain and anguish over everything that had happened with Tansy and reliving it for Zoe had brought a lot of it to the surface. Zoe used the time to process everything, sorting through whether she was mad or hurt or upset or – she didn't know. It was a lot to take in. She finally took a deep breath and turned to Wade.
"Is that all?" she asked. Wade bit his lip. As much as he'd told her, he knew he hadn't told her the part that would send her running.
"Well, almost."
"Almost?"
"Zoe, thing is… Well, I'm still – technically, legally, at least – married to Tansy."
There was a moment where Wade swore time stood still, as though the words hadn't yet made it from his mouth to Zoe's ears. He knew she'd heard him when she yanked her hand out of his and stood up quickly. Wade jumped to his feet as well.
"You're still married?" she shrieked. "All this time, you've been married and didn't think that I needed to know that?"
"Just on paper," he said. "I ain't been married in a long, long time."
"Just on paper?" Zoe repeated. "Just on paper? You're legally married, Wade! Oh my God. I've been sleeping with a married man. You realize that makes me the other woman?"
"Other woman? Zoe, no…"
"Oh my God," Zoe said again.
"Zoe, listen to me. It's not as big of a deal as you think…"
"Not a big deal?" Zoe shot back, rounding on Wade. "It's not a big deal that you're married? That I've been sleeping with you and out there somewhere you have a wife? Where is she anyway? Are you still in love with her?"
"No!" Wade said sharply. "I'm not in love with her. Not at all." Wade nearly told her then that she was the one he loved but he didn't want to tell her like that, under those circumstances. "She lives up near Birmingham. Last I heard, she was workin' in a salon. I've been tryin' to get her to sign divorce papers for years but she always sent 'em back for one reason or another. I don't know if she's holdin' on to the past or what. George Tucker's been helpin' me with a contested divorce. It's takin' some time but we're signing the final papers in another couple of weeks."
Zoe shook her head as though to clear her thoughts. There were too many things running through her head all at once.
"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked. "Why didn't you tell me any of this – about football, Tennessee, Tansy, any of it?" It was there, in that moment, that Wade realized just how much he'd kept from Zoe. He recalled what she'd said in his office earlier about how everyone she'd ever cared about lied to her, hurt her. He felt ill at the idea that he, too, had hurt her.
"I don't know," he confessed. "I just… I made a lot of bad decisions. I try to keep it all pushed into the back of my mind and just go on what's in front of me. I know that's not the best way to deal with it, but that's what works for me. I know I should have told you and I'm sorry I didn't." Zoe shook her head.
"I don't know what to say," she said. "I can't – it's too much." Wade reached for her but she stepped away. He let his arm fall back to his side.
"Zoe…"
"Don't," she said, starting towards the back door. "Just don't."
"Zoe, please…"
"I've got to go. I've got to… I just… I need to think."
"Let me drive you home. The night nurse will be here soon. I'll take you when she gets here." Wade was starting to feel desperate. He knew the moment he left Zoe to her thoughts it would be all over. He needed more time to reason with her. More time to explain himself and his actions.
"No, I'll drive myself," she said. She was on autopilot. "I'll just check on Earl one last time before I go…" She slipped back inside the house. Wade sank down on the top stair and buried his face in his hands. He heard her talking to Earl, her voice higher than normal as she tried to pretend everything was okay. He heard his dad replying to her, his uncanny ability to read people – one of the few good qualities he'd inherited from the man – seeing through her act. He listened as she told Earl she'd be back to check on him in a couple of days and to have someone call if he needed anything. Then he listened as she left the house, the front door closing behind her. He heard the hybrid start up and the gravel crunch under the tires. He only pulled himself away from his spot on the porch when the night nurse asked him for help in moving Earl from his chair to the bed.
Hours later, laying in his childhood bed, he pulled out his phone. He wasn't surprised there weren't any missed calls or texts from Zoe. He ignored messages from George and Lavon, not concerned about going fishing or who was taking care of the plantation's garden while he tended to his father. He sent Zoe a simple text.
Goodnight.
There was no reply.
Whew. There you have it. That was a lot.