45: Family Redefined.

Carl came to get me when it was time for dinner, his face still happy to see me. I was still happy to see him. I stood up and followed him out. I figured the less I had on me, the less they had to fear me, so I had taken off all of my weapons except the large hunting knife that sat in the sheath around my thigh that I kept my towel tucked into. I might want them to relax, but I wasn't going to leave myself defenseless.

"Thanks for the gift," I ruffled his hair as we made our way to the stairs.

"Did you like it?"

"Of course." I let him walk down before me, "I loved it."

"I'm sorry that you got bit," I couldn't help but appreciate the honesty in his voice. He was a good kid. He was a good person.

"Don't worry, it all worked out in the end." We were still just out of earshot of the tables so I took the opportunity to say something I'd wanted to all day, "I'm sorry I wasn't here to save them."

"I don't blame you."

I didn't ask him what he meant by that. There was no need to, he would tell me when he was ready. Instead I just followed him to a table where Beth and Maggie were sitting with Judith. There was complete quiet as I took my seat across from Maggie and the baby. I hated it. They were acting like I was going to turn right then and there and go on a cannibalistic rampage. If I'd wanted to do that I would've already. Now I just wanted to get to hang out with the only person there who I cared about, who cared about me. Carl set a plate of food in front of me before sitting down to his own. Upon noticing me the small thing reached out in my direction and made a gurgling sound, "I've been coddling her all week and all you have to do is walk in and she's immediately in love with you."

"She just recognizes our big sister," Carl reached over and rubbed the top of the baby's head.

I nudged him, "Who are you calling big?" It was nice to know that things with us hadn't changed. He was still my little brother. We were still family in his eyes. I took a small bite from the plate as I waved at the child, "Hey, little ass-kicker."

For some reason my word choice caused a burst of snickers from a few of the people around me. I shrugged it off. "Can Annie hold her, Rick?" Maggie looked behind her, "She'll just keep fussing, and my arms are getting tired."

When he looked at me I gave a weak smile. I didn't want to overstep any boundaries with the man, now I was a guest in his house. And just because Carl and Lori had considered me a part of their family didn't mean that kindness extended from him as well. I tried to read his face. He assessed the danger, that was clear, but there was something else. Sadness. "Sure, just be careful with her." The others at his table seemed a bit shocked about his decision, especially Daryl. He'd trusted me before, what changed?

"I will," I chimed as Maggie stood up and handed her over to me. The happiest noises came out of that child at that moment, and I couldn't feel bad anymore. I couldn't feel unloved, or unwanted, because it wasn't true. Those tiny eyes loved me, and that tiny smile wanted me there. "You're amazing," I said to Judith as various other conversations picked up. This was what I'd wanted, not all of it, but this part, this baby, was exactly what I hoped to find when I found them. I made it through my plate with her still in my arms. Carl would sometimes try to include me in whatever he was talking to Beth about, but I couldn't keep my eyes off the miniature human in my arms. The way she looked up at me was hypnotizing. Her eyes followed my every move, and every now and then something I did would amuse her to the point of laughter. This was worth it. This was all worth it. Whatever had happened out there, however difficult it had been to get through, the look on that child's face made it all feel like a distant memory.

"Carl, can you hold Judith for a minute? I have to have a talk with Annie." I carefully passed her over and joined Rick just inside one of the cells. This couldn't be good. Rick talking to me was never good. What would it be this time? Leave? I'm sorry, but we'll have to kill you?

"What's up?" I tried to sound as nonchalant as I could, regardless of my inner dialogue.

"You brought a lot of good supplies in that car," meaningless words. Pointless conversation. It must've been my extended time with Riley, but now polite chit-chat bothered me.

"Knew it would make me showing up a bit easier to stomach."

He nodded a few times, and stared at the wall. He had something to say, I didn't doubt that, but he took forever searching for the words. I wouldn't rush him though. "If I had just let you come with us," his voice was shaky.

When I realized what he meant I put my hand on his shoulder. He blamed himself for what happened. I tightened my grip slightly, "I wish I could've been her to protect…" I trailed off. The way he stood told me enough. He knew that if I had been with them, they'd be alive. The hunch of his shoulders, it must've been eating at him all weak. There was nothing I could say to make it better, but I still tried, "Can't do anything about it now." I heard a sigh escape him, "I'm sticking with those two from now on, though. I won't let anything happen to them, you can count on that."

He was silent again for a while. "Carl always talks about you like you're family. Lori did too, when she was…" I took my hand off of his shoulder with a pat and leaned against the bed frame. He turned to face me, and any weakness that he'd shown before was gone, but softness remained in his face, "As far as I'm concerned, you're a Grimes." I couldn't help the smile from parting my mouth and showing my teeth. A full-blown smile. I was one of them. I was part of the family, even to him. His hand clasped on my shoulder, "You keep those two safe, no matter what happens, you hear me?"

"Loud and clear, Pops."

-o0o-

I couldn't sleep. My mind wouldn't shut up, even when I tried to count sheep. I didn't like being caged up. I guess it was the animal in me, but being in that cell set me on edge. Like I was on display at the zoo or something, or I'd done something wrong and was now being punished. It would take some time to get used to, that's for sure. I rolled out of bed and sat on the floor, catching a bit of the moon and stars from the windows across the way. That helped. It helped to see the sky.

I heard footsteps coming down the walk, and soon a shadow covered me. "Couldn't sleep my first night here either."

The new woman in the group leaned against the wall just inside my cell; I gave a low chuckle, "Just when I'd thought I'd never be confined again." She stood there for a moment before my manners returned to me. I reached out my hand, "I'm Annie."

She gave it a quick shake, "Michonne."

"It's nice to meet you."

She nodded a few times, "So you made it out there on your own."

"Yeah, for the most part." I didn't want to get into what had happened with Riley. I didn't even know if I'd tell anyone about her, at least not for a long time. Riley was my own personal Jesus. I wasn't going to share her.

"The walkers don't notice you."

I held up my arm, "Guess it's a side effect."

"Would make things easier on the road, wouldn't even need to put anything down. Just walk right past 'em." There was a slight upturn to her last word. This was a test. She was testing me.

"I kill ever walker I see," my tone was sterner than I'd hoped it would be. I overcompensated with a smile, "Another side effect."

I think I saw a hint of a smile on her face then. I'd passed, and with flying colors no less. "Sleep," she turned and stepped out onto the walkway. I climbed back onto the mattress and went straight to sleep then. Part of me thinks it's because she told me to.

-o0o-

The next morning at breakfast Michonne joined Carl, Rick, and me at our table. Today I noticed how the others looked at her. It was not far off from how they were still looking at me (with the exception of my family), and considering her show of kindness I decided to try to do her the same.

"So, do you three want to hear how it happened?" I noticed several other ears perk up at my words, but chose to ignore them. Rick, Carl, and Michonne. They were the three who would get to hear the story. Carl nodded eagerly from his bite, and I got a small nod from the woman in front of me while my surrogate father kept on eating. "Well, so I had a nice safe place and these lovely people stayed with me for a bit. But they had to leave," I looked to Carl, "I'd gotten pretty attached so once they left I went a bit… I kept myself real busy." Michonne laughed at that for some reason and I felt myself loosen up, "So I wasn't sleeping or anything, just trying like mad to prepare the place for whenever I got the guts to leave. Then one day, I was so out of it I forgot to close the fence."

"You always close the fence," it had been the first words Daryl had spoken directly to me. I turned to look at him for a moment and then focused back on my table.

"I always close the fence. But that day I'd lost it. I was chopping away at a tree and started seeing things. Saw my dead brother," I laughed a bit, remembering the exchange I had with the ghost. "He told me to sleep, so I did. Slept like a baby that night, but when I woke up the place was over run." I pulled the towel from its place tucked into the sheath. It was still drenched in the blood of those men, so I held it up to my face to remind myself. I am human. I am fine. I made it out. The smell didn't even bother me; none of the smells bothered me. It was just proof that I wasn't alone anymore. I picked back up on the tale, "My last count was 236 of them. But I fought my way downstairs, needed to get to the car. Only problem was that I'd forgotten my things in the house so I had to go back."

"Could've gotten new things," he spoke again, only this time I didn't look at him. His voice didn't even sound like it used to.

I did my best to ignore what he'd said and carried on, "There were a few things that I couldn't have replaced, like your gift, little brother. So I went back. There was just one small blind spot. And that's when it got me. I was bleeding all over the place, but I made it to the garage to patch myself up a bit. Then," I held my fingers to mimic a gun, "Got to use all of my fancy guns. It would've been fun if I hadn't thought I was dying. Went quickly, too. Then, when the 236th soul had returned to the underworld," I got a bit of a laugh out of Rick, "I got a little drunk, and finally got around to reading Carl's notebook." The smile slipped from my face a bit, "Figured I was dying, it would be nice to not feel like I was alone at the end."

"You were willing to come back as one of those things?" Michonne took another bite, an air of false apathy around her.

"Bullet in the head had been the plan since all of this started, but on the day I didn't even… thought never crossed my mind. I just locked myself up and waited for the end."

"And you didn't die," she looked up at me.

"Nope, guess it's a good thing I didn't go killing myself," I laughed weakly, "I still thought I would the first day, I cleaned the house and everything, waited for the change, but nothing happened. Then I took a blood sample," I knew it would be unwise to share the whole truth, "I was fighting off the infection." Rick stood up from the table and took his empty plate with him. I took a lazy bite from my plate, gripping the cloth a bit tighter when I thought of what happened in the months that followed, "I knew I had to find my buddy here." Smiling, I poked Carl in the side before I continued in a straight face, "Near life experiences have a way of putting all the ducks in a row."

One of the other new faces took Rick's spot, "What's with the towel?"

My smile returned as I quoted Douglas Adams once more, "Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still know where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with."

Michonne's smile was obvious then as the man looked at me in confusion, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means she knows where her towel is," she grabbed her now empty plate and walked away.

She must've read that book, too. I smiled to myself as I took another bite. She said I knew where my towel was. It was a small validation, but it gave me something else to cling to. I extended my hand to the new man, "I don't believe we've met yet."

"Axel," he shook my hand and I noted the prison uniform. He was obviously still alive here when they'd arrived.

"Annie."

"Pleasure to meet you." I nodded and went about finishing my meal.

I didn't even make it to lunch before I felt the strong need to get out of there. I wanted fresh air. I wanted trees. I wanted less grey. I needed to do something. Something else to prove my worth. Something else to make this transition easier. I checked on Carl and Judith, then went off to look for Rick, finding him outside talking to Daryl about something. Focus Annie. Whatever might have happened back at the house was just a freak accident. Things only happened because you were there, no feelings. If there were feelings he'd have been happy to see you. I approached the two, but spoke only to Rick.

"I'm going hunting this afternoon, going to check if Michonne will go with me in case I get something big, if that's alright with you?"

Rick had opened his mouth to speak, but Daryl beat him, "There ain't nothing in those woods except walkers and squirrels."

I shrugged and waited for Rick's response. The way he looked at me now was nothing like when we'd first met. He'd meant what he said. We were family. "Only if she goes with you, and be back before sundown." The way he spoke to me was fatherly, and I couldn't restrain my delight of that fact.

"Thanks, I'll go get her and we'll head out," I hurried back to the cellblock. It was easy to get her to agree to join me. She felt cooped up, too. She wanted to be out of the fences, back into the wild. She followed me as I walked, bow drawn, through the forest. Following my nose. Yes, there were lots of squirrels out here, but I could smell something better. Coyote? Maybe a deer? The walkers around us didn't notice our presence until there was a katana in their face. I didn't even have to tell her to do it; she just followed and picked off whatever dead-head she could get close to. No need for superfluous phrases. She, too, knew where her towel was.

An hour in, when I saw the buck, I held up my hand to her to stop and keep quiet, then I re-aimed and let go. Clean shot. We walked over to the behemoth. "Right in the eye," she said in admiration as she looked down at it.

"We can either both carry it, and get back quick," I removed the arrow and wiped it off on my towel, "Or I can carry it and you can take care of the walkers, and we get back safe."

"Safe," I nodded and handed her my bow and quiver. She slid them on just as I pulled the beast onto my shoulders.

"All those squats are finally coming in handy," I chuckled at her as she unsheathed her sword, I could just make out her shoulders trying to conceal a laugh.

New Chapter out, and in record time if I do say so myself. :) Thank you for reading and reviewing and everything! I can't even express how motivated you all keep me, and I hope you're all liking this fanfic. A big thanks to my beta-reader for putting up with my quick updates!

So, question time: Annie found a new partner in Michonne, do you think it's because she reminds her so much of Riley? The baby loves Annie, which is great for her, but how do you think the other women will react to the child's obvious preference? Now that Annie is a part of the group officially (in Rick's eyes) what role do you think she'll be playing? Can't wait to hear what you all think! (I love my readers!)