I finally updated, sorry about the delay!
IMPORTANT: I was checking over some stuff and I realized there were some parts where Makoto was a bit too OOC for my tastes and it annoys me to no end. Especially concerning his issues with Rin. The more I think about it, the more I can't imagine Makoto ever being angry or holding a grudge against anyone. Pretty sure Rin could murder somebody and Makoto would be all like, "It's cool man, it's cool." So I'm changing some of the dialogue to match and fixing some backstory back on the bulletin board of ideas on my computer. It's nothing major where you have to re-read, just showing a more regretful Makoto and you know, sad, instead of being angry or bitter because it just doesn't seem to fit his character all too well.
This chapter has been beta-ed by my majestic beta-reader: Know-Your-Place
Disclaimer: I don't own Free! because 1.) I got no contract or technical stuff 2.) I can't draw to save my life
"Nee-chan, will you be staying with us tonight?" Ran asked, holding Haruka's hand and swinging it as they walked along.
Haruka made a noncommittal sound and jerked his head in Makoto's direction. The oblivious brunet was carrying a chatty Ren on his back. The little brunet was pointing at various things and talking incessantly as Makoto nodded and went along with the conversation. Ran made a disgusted face and turned back to look at the blue-eyed teen. "Nee-chan, what's that locket you're wearing?" She pointed to the rusty little locket that swung from his neck. "It looks really, really old! Did Onii-chan give it to you?" She looked a little annoyed at the last part, and glared at her brother.
Haruka clutched the old thing to his chest. "No, someone else gave it to me."
"Ehhhh? Who gave it to you Nee-chan, if it wasn't Onii-chan?" She pulled on his arm insistently, trying to get him to lean over so she could inspect the locket herself.
"A friend."
Ran pouted, "Mou, you didn't answer my question at all Nee-chan!" She puffed her cheeks and swung Haruka's hand more roughly. Thankfully, she switched topics, "So will you be sleeping over again Nee-chan? If you do, I promise I'll share my marshmallows for you!"
Apparently, Ren had overheard and screeched, "Those aren't your marshmallows, they're mine!"
"So?! I'm gonna eat them with Nee-chan and Onii-chan and you can't have any!" she said, sticking her tongue out at him.
"Nu-uh, I'm gonna eat with Onii-san and Haruka-san. Only big kids get to roast marshmallows!"
"Only big kids walk on their own, you're the baby who's being carried by Onii-chan!" she said, pointing and glaring at Makoto, daring for him to contradict. The brunet simply sighed.
"That's because Onii-chan offered to carry me, he obviously likes me more than you!"
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
Makoto jostled Ren in his arms a bit, as the young boy was starting to slip. "Oi, oi, I like both of you just the same. If you guys keep fighting, Haruka isn't going to want to stay."
That shut them up quickly, but that didn't stop the dirty glares they threw at one another every so often. They walked back to the Tachibana house in silence. Haruka didn't mind the quiet. He wasn't really good at talking to people in the first place. Upon arriving at the house, the merman spoke up, "I'm going home."
The twins' faces fell. "But, but Nee-chan, can't you at least stay for dinner?"
"Yeah, Onii-san's cooking may suck, but it'll be fun, we promise!" Ren said, pulling himself away from his brother and tugging at Haruka's other arm.
"I can't…" Haruka felt lost, unsure of himself when he looked into those innocent, pleading faces.
Makoto sighed and walked over, placing a warm hand on his shoulder, "If you're going to go back, will you at least let me walk you home this time?" The children gave their brother incredulous looks.
"But Onii-san, if you're married, you have to spend the night together!" Ran piped in.
Ren followed along, "Yeah, you're supposed to be persuading Haruka-san to stay, not to go away!"
"No, definitely not!" the brunet said, turning red, "We're just… just friends, okay? If Haruka needs to go home, then he needs to go home, understood?"
The twins looked at their feet, crestfallen. Feeling guilty that he had caused all the commotion, the merman knelt down and patted both of them on the head. He pulled out the flower clip that Ran had given him and placed it in her hair. "I promise I'll be back," he said in what he hoped was a reassuring voice. The twins lit up and hugged him tightly, screaming goodbyes and prattling about plans for when he would return.
After getting the kids safely inside, Makoto accompanied him on the way to the beach. They walked in silence, Haruka opting to look at the ocean instead of the sweet brunet by his side.
"Ne, Haruka," the taller male said suddenly, "when will you be back? Did I… Did I scare you?"
What? Where did this come from? Haruka looked at him, confused, "Why would I be scared of you?"
The green-eyed teen rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, "Well, I said some really weird things at the park, and I must have embarrassed you when I fell on you, so I just wanted to apologize…."
The raven sighed. "You don't need to apologize."
"But-"
He flicked the brunet on the forehead, "I said you don't have to, stupid."
"I'm sor-… All right then," Makoto finished awkwardly before letting silence fall around them again. At the crossroads between the docks and the beach near the pier, Haruka stopped.
"You should go home." The brunet looked taken aback by the statement. "I'll be fine, you should go be with your family."
Makoto grabbed his shoulder, "But you're my friend! I don't want you to get hurt like last time I let you walk by yourself…"
Haruka smacked the hand away, "I'll be fine," he said, a little irritated. "Go home already." The merman immediately regretted his words as the brunet pulled back as if he had been stung. The teen dropped his hand to his side and sighed, his expression a little disappointed.
"If… If you're fine, then I guess I'll go…" He turned, but the raven grabbed his arm. He hadn't meant to say it like that. He just needed… air. A contradictory statement coming from a mermaid like himself, but he just needed some time to think. He was struggling with these… feelings, and he wasn't sure what to think. Makoto's presence didn't help clear his head at all, it just made him feel even more flustered, confused.
"I don't mean it like that," he said quickly, "I don't want you to waste your time with me is all…"
Makoto turned and slowly smiled. "I understand, you want to be alone for a bit, right?" Haruka blinked, the human seemed to read his mind like a book. "I guess I have been a little clingy." Before the merman knew it, he was being embraced by the taller human, "But just remember, if you ever need help, you can come find me, okay?" He pulled away, "Just… Just be careful, all right?"
The raven, dumbfounded, could only nod and Makoto let go.
"I'll see you later then, Haruka?" Another quiet nod.
"Okay, um, I'll see you. Bye, Haruka," the brunet waved and walked away, albeit slower and somewhat dragging his feet. The merman walked away towards the beach, at last by himself. He struggled a bit, making his way through the sandy dunes to get to the little cave Rin had shown him once before. He eventually just stopped. He turned to watch the sunset, the sky painting the sea an orange hue. He had missed the water greatly, but for some odd reason, he didn't think about it at all when he was with Makoto.
Now that he was alone, his was skin itching to be swimming in the cool water again. But his heart was aching. Pinning for what, he wasn't sure. Before, he thought it was just because he'd missed Rin, now it seemed he was missing something more.
He shook his head and tried to get rid of those odd thoughts. He couldn't wait to get away and was all but ready to take off these annoying clothes when a familiar voice called out to him. He was so sure he was hallucinating, until he turned around.
"Rin…" he said, astonished. The redhead was waving to him and walked over to him.
"I missed you," Rin said simply. He offered a hand and Haruka found himself being pulled roughly back onto land.
They sat at the park again. It was just them, sitting at the swings as it was already night time. Haruka sat there, hands clutching the chains tightly. He wasn't sure why Rin was being so… nice. He thought that he would have to be the one to find Rin, and even then, he wasn't sure if the redhead would even accept his attempts to apologize.
The swimmer was currently getting a drink for each of them from a vending machine nearby. It wasn't that he didn't like Rin being nice to him, but it was odd. From their last meeting several years ago, the redhead had made it abundantly clear that he hated him. The memory made his chest tighten.
So far, his attempts to apologize would be cut off. The swimmer would simply direct the topic to something else, like Haruka's well-being, how was Iwatobi without him, and the like. Rin seemed distracted too, when they were walking. He had a hard time looking at the merman, and whenever they made eye contact, the redhead would turn away to look at something else. It bothered the raven a lot. What was wrong?
Something cold touched his forehead, and he flinched. Looking up, he saw Rin standing over him, holding a cold drink. "Here, I opened it for you already," he said, passing the drink over to the startled merman. Hesitantly, Haruka took the proffered drink, but didn't drink it.
"So…" Rin began awkwardly, "How have you been…?"
The merman couldn't help but sigh. "You can't think of anything better to ask?"
"Oi, just gimme a minute!" he paused, "How's your fish?"
Haruka rolled his eyes and turned away to look at the rock beside his feet. It felt almost like nothing had changed. Like all the things that had passed never happened. It was making him nervous.
"Rin."
"What?" The merman looked at the swimmer, his expression was blank, and for once, unreadable.
"I… I'm sorry," he said softly. He squeezed the swing's chain and looked resolutely on the ground. "I should have done… something that day. I'm sorry."
Rin stayed quiet before giving a noncommittal grunt. He was looking off into the distance, as if he was unsure of what to say. An uncomfortable silence settled over them. Normally, the merman was perfectly fine with silence, but the quiet was starting to get to him. He was going to say something, anything, to clear the mood, but Rin beat him to it.
"That's nice."
Really? What was that supposed to mean? He was about to ask when Rin suddenly leaned in very close. Haruka jerked back immediately and pushed him back reflexively while dropping the drink in his hands. The redhead frowned and grabbed the swing's chain, ensuring the other couldn't back away this time. He reached forward and the raven closed his eyes. He was holding the swing's chains so tightly that his hands were becoming numb. He jumped when he felt Rin's hand cup his cheek and then trail down to his neck.
He seemed to be searching for something… The raven's eyes shot open when he realized what the swimmer had grabbed. The locket. That old, rusty locket that Rin had given him many years ago. "You still have it," the redhead stated. His voice sounded relieved almost, and then he smirked. "I bet you don't even bother keeping clean huh?" He pulled away, much to the merman's relief. "Don't take it off, got it?" He brushed off nonexistent dust from his shirt and then looked up at Haruka as if he just realized he was there. "I'll see you later."
He walked off, leaving Haruka there to stare at his back in shock. The merman got up and yelled, "Wait!" The redhead stopped, not bothering to turn around. "Rin… Rin, will you forgive me?"
At this, the swimmer turned around. He gave the other a lopsided smile, "What do you think?" He turned around, his back facing Haruka again, "I don't have any intention of staying friends though, so tell Makoto to back off."
"What?" But the swimmer had run off, not bothering to look back even once. The merman was tempted to chase after him, but he stayed put. He stared at the puddle where the drink fell and grimaced at the stickiness on his hands. He walked towards the beach again. Before long, he broke into a jog. He couldn't take off those clothes fast enough and jumped into the water without a second thought. He swam outwards, not caring where he was going so long as it was away from there.
Rin didn't want to be friends. He didn't want apologies. He didn't know what he wanted at all. The only thing he got from that conversation was that Rin wanted him to stay away from Makoto.
Makoto… The thought of the kind human made him turn back. He popped his head out of the water when he was nearing shore again, ensuring that no boats or people were in sight. Coming closer to the beach, he found the discarded clothing and wrapped them together in a tight, wet ball. Swimming quickly, he went back to that little, rocky crag he called home.
Going in through the little tunnel, he rushed past all the fish that had gathered there in his absence. They crowded around him and a few audacious ones nibbled at his tail. He flicked them away with a swish of a fin. He didn't really eat these fish, too small to make a proper meal, but they were good company. Well, good as a pet. He broke the surface and placed the soaked clothes on the somewhat dry ledge at the side of the cave. He stacked the clothes as neatly as possible and placed a rock on top of it so it wouldn't float away.
He leaned on the rock and placed his head down, staring at the rumpled clothes in front of him. He sighed and thought about the odd brunet that had given them to him. He kissed him. The memory made his cheeks burn, though from embarrassment or something else, he wasn't sure.
Makoto… being around him was just comfortable. Like being in the water, calm and stable. It was always warm around the brunet, a welcoming air that promised peace and quiet.
Tired from the day's events, the merman finally shut his eyes. The last thing on his mind was a certain brunet and the kiss they accidentally shared.
Makoto was taking out the trash. If he thought the house was a mess before with Haruka's arrival, he was dead wrong. At one point, when he was cleaning up, he found there were footprints on the ceiling. He wasn't sure how they even got to the ceiling, but they were there. As soon as Haruka left, the twins pretty much went nuts. Now that there was no need to compose themselves in front of a guest, they went all out. At the moment, they were playing some weird, pretend game downstairs with Ran as the invincible princess and Ren as the invincible knight locked in some sort of duel involving marshmallows.
He could hear the noise even from outside. He should probably tell them to quiet down, but just one night of fun wouldn't hurt. After all, they had probably missed being at home, even if they were only gone for a week. Throwing the bag inside and slamming the receptacle shut, he was about to go inside when he saw a redhead standing in front of him.
"Rin?" Makoto rubbed his eyes. Did he get hit by something or… something?
"Hey," the swimmer said, nonchalantly. His stance was less aggressive as it had been at the supermarket, but his posture was still tense. "Let me get to the point, stay away from Haruka."
The brunet widened his eyes. "How… How do you know about Haruka?"
"Does it matter? Just back off, I saw him first and I don't intend to lose him to you," the redhead said with an surprisingly serious expression.
He was going to regret it later, but, "And if I don't want to?"
Rin's eyes flashed, "Then it's just going to be a lot more painful for you. I'll spare you the heartache and say that he's mine and always has been." He spun on his heel and began walking away, "See ya later, Mako-chan."
"Wait!" And the brunet tried to run after the redhead, but ended up tripping over the trashcan, spilling its contents onto the sidewalk. "Gah, Rin, wait-" But Rin was gone. Makoto sighed, and ran a hand through his hair exasperatedly. Why did he have to be such a klutz? And what the heck was that all about? Haruka's mine.
He was surprised when he found himself feeling a bit annoyed rather than guilty at the statement. He liked Haruka, perhaps more than he should. Rin had met Haruka first and surely knew him better... But another part of him was indignant and jealous, and… maybe a teensy bit possessive. He smacked his forehead, what was wrong with him? Sure, he could acknowledge that he was holding affections for the other, but it was just a teensy little, maybe-a-bit-clingy, crush.
If Rin was happy with this, if they could all be friends again, shouldn't he accept this? It would be nice to have all of them together again. He could never put his own feelings before the others, who so obviously missed the redhead. He couldn't possibly jeopardize a possible return of friendship by thinking of himself. So he picked up the trash, almost robotically, trying to tell himself not to feel or think about the raven-haired boy that was occupying his thoughts.
When he went back inside, the kids had passed out on the floor. The floor of all places! There were two perfectly comfortable couches in the living room, but they had decided to lay down on the hard, wooden floor. He sighed and picked both of them up, Ran was slung over his shoulder while Ren was carried in the crook of his arm.
Thankfully, they were already changed and he had forced them to brush their teeth and refused to allow them to eat any of the marshmallows they were playing with before so it was safe, he supposed, to tuck them into bed. Making sure they were nice and snug, he gave each a peck on the forehead before going downstairs to survey the mess. Honestly, the living room looked like a hurricane passed through. Which meant it was utterly perfect.
Makoto didn't really like messes, but he was happy to no longer be alone in the house. At first, it had been nice to have some peace and quiet coming from the noisy everyday antics of his family. But he quickly grew bored of it. Perhaps that was why he had become so attached to Haruka. He was someone who happened to catch his interest during a time in which he felt… well… lonely. I mean, who wouldn't be interested in finding a beautiful mermaid like him? But maybe he was just being clingy and annoying, like he always had been.
It would pass. Like it had before. "I'm fine staying like this. I can't be selfish…" he muttered to himself, in a sort of mantra as he picked up the various toys that littered the floor. Repeat something enough, and it will eventually come true as the saying goes. "I don't like Haruka like that, he's just a friend," he said over and over again. But no matter how many times he said it, it didn't work. All that served to do was intensify the crushing sensation in his chest. It was awful. The night was awful. The morning was awful. It was just… awful.
Was he being a pushover? No. He was simply preserving their friendship. That's what it was. A traitorous voice inside the brunet sneered at him, it said that he should fight, do something for himself. He silenced the voice. Getting breakfast (cereal, because Makoto would burn the house down with anything otherwise) for the kids, Ren noticed that his older brother wasn't feeling well.
"Ne, Onii-san, what's wrong?" Ren asked, being the more tactful, and observant twin.
Ran jumped on the uptake and began to question the eldest child as well, "Yeah Onii-san, you can tell Ran-chan-"
"You can tell us," Ren said with a look.
The girl rolled her eyes, "Fine, Ran-chan and Ren will help Onii-chan if you have problems!"
Makoto looked up from his cereal and smiled, "I'm fine guys, there's nothing wrong!"
The twins shared a knowing look. Ran spoke up, "Is it because of Onee-chan that Onii-chan is sad?"
The older brunet flinched and then stared at his younger sister, "How… ?"
The girl looked smug and smiled mysteriously, "Okaa-chan says it's woman's intuition!"
Ren groaned, but didn't argue about his twin's supposed intuition, "Do you miss Onee-chan that much?"
"Ugh, no guys, it's not that, it's just…" the eldest sibling trailed off and ran a tired hand through his hair, "Me and Haruka are just friends. Haruka likes someone else, and I-"
"Then fight!" Ran exclaimed, standing on her chair and putting a foot on the table. She held up her spoon like a sword, posing like a knight. "Defeat Onii-chan's rival for Nee-chan's hand in marriage like… like… uh…" she paused before brightening up, "Like Romeo and Juliet!"
All Makoto could say was, "Eh?"
Ren facepalmed, "Onii-san, how can you be so dense?'
But the female twin continued her impassioned speech, "You have to fight for your love Onii-chan, so that way you can be together forever and ever!"
"Ran, you do know that Romeo and Juliet died at the end, right?" the male twin deadpanned.
"E-Eh?" she turned red and then puffed a cheek in indignation, "They did not! They lived happily ever after and Onii-chan and Nee-chan should too! Onii-chan can't give up, because I know that Nee-chan really likes Onii-chan too! So Onii-chan has to keep on fighting till the end!"
Ren gave a long-suffering sigh, "I agree with Ran, Onii-san. You have to fight to get what you want. Onii-san can't be so nice and let someone take Haruka-san away, don't be the victim of bullying Onii-san," the boy said, nodding his head sagely.
Makoto sighed, "I suppose you're right…" Then he laughed, "Am I really so dumb that I need my little siblings to teach me about love?"
"Of course!" they said at the same time. He was being pathetic, he'd admit. He liked Haruka a lot. Not just as a friend, he was sure that the blushes and the butterflies were clear signs of that. He wanted to be with him and he couldn't let Rin rule his life and dictate his actions. This… This was different. What he had with Rin, inside he knew it wouldn't be the same as before, it would never come together to what they had and any other would be a mockery of the past. He needed to move on, and if learning to step up and make a claim…. Okay, that sounded wrong… Well, if he had feelings for the merman, then there shouldn't be anything holding him back from trying his best! Except Haruka was a merman… not a human … Loved water… didn't understand the human world…
The previously riled up atmosphere died down to one of uncertainty. He put his head in his hands and groaned, "Why does this all have to be so complicated?" And with that, smacked his head back onto the table. The twins just shrugged their shoulders and continued eating. They were sure that Makoto would get back to being himself soon. Well… as soon as Haruka came back.
Haruka sneezed. He looked around, half-expecting Makoto to be around and fussing over him, but was somewhat disappointed to see that he was alone… again. It had only been a few days. Why was he so focused on this human? Affections should die down quickly. Given time, they disappeared, weakened. He hadn't felt so exhausted even during his time with Rin.
So he did what first came to mind. He toyed with the fish, occasionally poking and nudging a few here and there. He watched as they got up and went about their daily lives. Eating, sleeping, cleaning, fighting over mates, then the actual, well… mating. He swam off when that started as it tended to dirty the water a bit. He would wait till the tide washed out the muck.
Next was hunting… which was done and over within an hour. Eating hadn't taken much time either as he usually just ate it raw. He had eaten cooked fish only a few times. Sometimes with Rin, and closer to the present, with Makoto. He fondly remembered times when Rin would arrive, bearing whatever lunch he had to share.
He remembered bringing shells, herding fish, and searching endlessly for pearls to give to his precious friend. He didn't remember when that fire began to sprout in his chest, that fire that burned solely for Rin. He also didn't remember when that fire began to die away only to be replaced by… something else? It was difficult. All this time, Rin had assumed the only place in his heart, but now, it felt as if someone else was moving in as well. Each not willing to concede to the other. It was hard to believe he could care for someone else like that so easily, so why… ?
He spent another hour drifting about, thinking these things and then reminiscing. When that was over, he returned to his humble home. The fish had finished, and hopefully, the sperm produced had been washed away, and at the very least, diluted, and no longer painfully present. He stared at the clothes sitting in a pile. They were still wet, but not as they were the night before, and were now slightly damp.
He touched the cloth and breathed into it. It smelled foreign, like that sweet smell… aromatic and spicy, yet oddly sweet. What was it? Cinnamon… that was it. He leaned into it and closed his eyes, using the pile as a pillow. It took another moment to realize that Makoto smelled like this the last time he saw him. Makoto had used the cinnamon in the tea he had given, and he hadn't changed his clothes since that night. The smell must have rubbed off on the merman's clothes when they fell asleep together.
Funny how that smell could survive dirt and the ocean. Haruka was grateful for it. And another pang of loneliness hit him. He never truly comprehended how lonely his cave became over the years. Everyone was gone… gone to somewhere else he couldn't follow or gone to someplace better. He alone, stayed behind. He thought that as long as he had water and fish, he would survive. He could enjoy solitude. But it seemed that that was not the case.
"I'm going," he said aloud to himself, and then he turned to look at the fish swimming below. "I'm going. Take care of the house." The fish didn't respond, only continuing to swim throughout the coral reef, darting in and out of every nook and cranny.
He picked up the set of clothes and held them tight to his chest. Before long, he was speeding towards shore, back to the beach where he could see that face again.
As you can probably tell, I don't really like Rin. He gets on my nerves, don't really know why, he just does. Anyways, please drop a review on your way out! :D Thanks again to those who favorited/followed/reviewed/actually-bothered-to-take-the-time-to-read-this-story and everything.