Sorry for the wait! New episodes, so writing it can be a bit touch and go. ENJOY!

65: Home

We had only been sitting up there for an hour longer when I got this feeling in the pit of my stomach. I'd gotten it a few times before in my life and it had always been a bad omen. Today would be no different. The message was clear. Something was wrong. Something bad was about to happen, and I couldn't just sit here. I needed to try to be proactive. I needed to try to contribute. I needed to keep my mind off of everything that had been nagging at me. I needed to do more than look through binoculars.

I looked down at my still swollen ankle. I wish it were just better already. I didn't have time for crutches, not with this feeling in my gut. It wasn't safe to be without the full use of my hands, let alone slowed down by anything. How do I fix it?

Splint.

That would be the only way to let it continue to heal and free up my hands. It was my best bet to start helping again. Whatever I was feeling, however lost or empty, it would have to wait. Maybe forever. For now I needed to free up the use of both of my legs. I needed to make a splint for myself. And I know just how to make one. I could use parts of the crutches and some rope, and then I'd be almost back to normal. Normal enough to go out into the woods and try to sniff out the Dixon brothers. I pulled some rope from one of the cabinets and carefully crawled onto the floor to work.

"What are you doing, Annie?" Carl watched as I began hastily taking the crutches apart, throwing the spare parts to the side of the room.

"Making a splint," I didn't look up at him, I just kept my eyes on the task at hand. I put one of the height adjustments on either side of my calf and began to tie the pieces together carefully, "So I can walk by myself."

"Why?"

"I can't just sit here," I glanced up for a second, my hands still tying, "I gotta check the woods, try and find Daryl."

"But," he stopped pacing for a moment, "What if the Governor's men come?"

"That's why we need Daryl," I tightened the makeshift brace around my knee, "Merle can help, too."

"I meant what if they come while you're gone?"

I looked up at him and realized that he was worried. He was worried just like me. Maybe he had a gut feeling, too. I nodded to his gun, "Then take care of them."

"But we need you here."

"I won't go too far," I stood up and took a few testing steps, "I promise."

When he looked at me I could see the disappointment on his face. Maybe it wasn't a good idea for me to go combing the woods, but what else was I supposed to do? Just sit here and wait? I just couldn't do that. When I walked for the door he came with me, "I should go check on everyone."

"Good idea," I patted his shoulder as he passed me and started down the stairs.

His head turned slightly to the side, "Be safe out there."

"I will be." Once we reached the bottom we went our separate ways. "Should probably tell Rick what I'm going to do," I scanned the fields. I couldn't find Rick anywhere. But I did find Michonne picking around an old overturned bus, and I saw Hershel hauling serious ass on his crutches, "Where the hell is he going?" I yelled over the field, "Hershel, you know where Rick is?"

He motioned to the forest with one of his crutches, "Went off into the woods."

"Shit," I mumbled before speaking up once more, "If you see him tell him I went looking for Daryl!" Once I saw a nod I decided it might be best if I had someone with me. Maybe Michonne could help? I made my way over to the bus, tripping a few times over the uneven ground. I still wasn't at full capacity, but it was far better than those crutches. "Michonne," I leaned against the splint for a moment as I caught my breath, "I'm going to head out to—"

Bang.

A loud gunshot rang out through the air and we froze. Then came the rain of gunfire. There was burning and I couldn't tell where the sounds were coming from, not with my ear hole bandaged. Shit. I ducked low and crept closer to the bus for cover, "What the fuck is that?"

Michonne's eyes were filled with focus as she spoke, "Get down."

"Shit," I peaked out from behind the bus being careful not to stick my neck out too much, "I thought we'd have more time." I heard more gunfire. It felt so close. Why did it feel so close? Something is wrong. I felt wrong. What's wrong?

"Just stay down," she pulled me back behind the protective metal of the grey bus, "They'll run out of ammo eventually." She was right. It sounded like they were using automatics. Waste of bullets. There weren't that many of us, they knew that. Why would they be wasting so many bullets? Why… why do I feel so lightheaded?

"I don't feel so good," I swayed slightly as I tried to look myself over. My right arm was bleeding now. When did that happen? Why was it bleeding?

Michonne quickly grabbed it to get a better view. "Just a graze," she nodded to my gun, "Got a bunch of steel protecting us. The others need some cover fire. A diversion." I nodded and readied the piece before leaning out and popping off a couple rounds into the forest line near the car. None of the shots seemed to hit anything.

"Shit," I could see my hands shaking as I attempted to steady the gun. There'd be no way in hell for me to hit any of them, not with my arm like this. "My-my aims off."

"It's just to distract 'em," her words reassured me, "Buy the others some time." We heard two loud clangs and watched as a van came barreling through the front gates and over the field.

I couldn't help myself but ask the obvious as my mouth gapped open, "What the fuck is that?"

"Don't know," Michonne pulled out her katana, "But it doesn't look good."

"Don't suppose it's just the ice cream man? Could really go for a snow-cone right now." I leaned against the sweltering metal, wrapping my hand around my new wound. I couldn't lose any more blood. Not now. Not after I lost so much yesterday. I ripped the bottom of my shirt and dressed the knick as best as I could. I couldn't keep getting hurt like this; I'd be dead by dawn. Once it was secure I peaked out from behind Michonne. We watched in horror as the back of the van dropped opened. Then they came out. Walkers came running out. Damnit. At least they didn't have guns.

"We gotta try to take care of them," she turned back to me, "Got your knife?"

I pulled it from its home at my thigh, "I'll be right behind ya."

She gave me a nod, "Let's go." As we ran out, into the deadies, into the nightmare, everything else disappeared. I hobbled as fast as I could, taking out whatever was close enough for me to sink my blade into. A few yards in front of me I could see the glint of the katana as it sliced through the muck like butter. It was just us slicing through the snarling dead. Whatever else that was happening around us didn't get through. Just the sounds of flesh being sliced apart. It was all there was.

When there was another roar of an engine I searched for the source, hoping that it wasn't another truck full of biters. That's when we saw the silver pick up. One of ours. Thank God.

"Get in!" It was Glenn, climbing out of the driver's seat, "Get in!" We followed the orders, piling in the cab and panting.

Hershel's voice rang through as we started to move again, "Any of you hit?"

I grunted as Michonne spoke for me, "Annie was grazed."

"Looks like there leavin'." There was relief in Glenn's voice.

I couldn't see Hershel, but I could hear the confusion in his tones, "Why?"

They didn't understand. They didn't understand just who these people were. I spit out my words, "Got what they came here for."

"We're still alive though?"

"Broke the fence, shot all those extra rounds to draw every dead-head here for a couple of miles. Figured the walkers will take care of any survivors," I stared out the window as I wiped the sweat off of my face.

Glenn's words were quiet, "The noise."

Michonne spoke up, goal driven as ever, "What are we gonna do?"

"We'll take care of it once we've regrouped."

When the car stopped we got out. I could see Carol in the distance, kneeling beside a body clothed in black. Axel. No. Damnit. I looked around. Beth, Maggie, Glenn, Michonne. Where the hell is Rick? Shit. I started to make my way over to Axel's body when I noticed Carl. His face was expressionless.

"Buddy," I nudged him with my splinted foot as I walked by, "You okay?" He too was looking over at Carol, but I saw him nod faintly. He might've been lying, but he's a fighter. He'll make it through. We'll make it through. I trained my gaze over to Carol, silently crying beside the motionless body of her friend. Would she be okay? I felt as my feet dragged their way off in her direction. I knew we weren't friends. I knew she didn't like me. But maybe those things don't matter now. Maybe what mattered was that I needed a mom and she needed a friend, maybe even a daughter eventually.

I closed the gap between Carol and the myself. She was just sitting beside his body; I could see the subtle contractions in her shoulders as she stared down at him. They had been with each other all day, helping to fortify. She must've been with him when it happened. I don't know why exactly, but I just couldn't stand seeing her like that. I couldn't stand her being there, alone. She shouldn't be alone at a time like this. I knelt down beside her and she snapped over at me, "What do you want?"

I ignored her hostility. She'd lost a friend. Anger is a natural reaction to loss. Anger is a natural reaction to most things these days. I let go of my wound and wrapped my good arm around her shoulders, scooting closer to her, "I'm so sorry."

Her voice was almost hollow, "It all happened so fast. I didn't know what to do, so I…"

I pulled her in closer. It reminded me of when my mom used to cry, that powerless feeling. There's nothing worse then when a child sees their mother cry; all you want to do is make it stop, make it better. That was all I wanted to do for her now. I wanted to do something, anything to ease the pain, even if she hated me. I didn't hate her, I couldn't. I wiped my bloody hand on my leg and wrapped her with both arms. I could feel her sobs grow more severe, "You're safe now." I rubbed her back as I sat there with her; it might not have been the hug I'd wanted earlier, the roles had reversed, but it was what she needed. That's what families do. Even when things don't go your way, you have to get past it. You have to help each other when you can. I spoke softly down into her ear, "He protected you?"

Her hands grabbed my sides, "I didn't have anywhere else to hide." I looked over to the body. Riddled with bullet holes. Total overkill, they must've been trying to get to her. That must have been awful.

"He'd be glad," I rubbed the back of her head, trying to calm her down, "Glad he could help keep you safe."

She pulled away slightly, "Why are you—"

"Shh," I pulled her back in. Of course she'd be confused as to why I was here. She wouldn't understand why I wanted to help her, not yet. I'd tell her later, once things relaxed, but for now she didn't need to know why. She just needed someone here. I could be that person. We were two people who'd lost their families, why couldn't we form one of our own?

"You shouldn't be here!" I heard Glenn's raised voice faintly behind us.

"We just helped save his ass," who the hell was that? "You ungrateful—" This wasn't the time or the place for an argument.

"Do you mind!?" I turned my head as I shouted towards the bickering group. Then I saw the owner of the other voice. Merle. And behind him there he was. Daryl. The Dixon brothers, the people I was going to go try to find, right here. He came back. I could feel the shocked expression on my face fade as Beth approached us.

"I can sit with her now," she nodded for me to join the rest of them. I stood up slowly, getting my still unfamiliar footing as a ball of anxiety filled my stomach and my vision began to blur. He was back.

Merle smiled over at me when I got to them, "Look who it is. Ol' One Ear."

I couldn't help but laugh as I reached out to shake his hand for the first time. He looked at it for a second before giving in, "Glad it all worked out for you."

"Wish I could say the same to you too, Killer."

I nodded and let go of his hand. He'd let me live. He didn't kill me. I furrowed my eyebrows; "You didn't kill me, does that mean I owe you now?"

"Didn't kill me neither, Blondie."

I let out a low laugh, "Good." I turned to Daryl, wanting to say something, but before I could open my mouth I was being called on.

"Annie," Hershel clacked over to right beside me, "Let's get you inside."

"Can't I…?" I nodded over to Daryl.

He shook his head and nodded down to my right arm, "I'll need to patch up your arm right away."

I just stood there for a second, trying to figure out what he meant. Then I remembered. The bullet graze. "Oh," I looked down at the bit of fabric covering the gash; it was still oozing blood, "I forgot."

-o0o-

As I sat on the bottom bunk of the vacant cell with Hershel failing at his attempts to re-bandage my arm all of my concerns flooded over me. I couldn't shake the feeling that maybe I was supposed to die in that room in Woodbury. I couldn't fight the rage that filled my heart when I thought about the Governor shooting Axel. I should have killed him. I should have killed him the other night. I should have killed him today. He should be dead, or maybe I was supposed to be dead. Either way, one of us has to die. As the blood continued to flow I started to lose my focus, my control. I felt as the hot tears started to fall from my face.

"I'm sorry," I softly whimpered as I tried to wipe what I could from my eyes.

"No need to be," he continued his work, "Reckon it's been a hard couple of days for us all."

I nodded as he pulled a suture needle and thread from his bag. Great. More stitches. I already look like a busted ragdoll. It'll help with the healing though. He started to tug at my skin and I sighed, "I'm tired of getting hurt."

He let out a small laugh, "I'd imagine so." I don't know why, but his words made me feel just a bit better. I wish I had a bedside manner like his. It's crazy to think he was just a vet before all of this.

I watched carefully as he sewed the last few stitches. "Don't ya think it's funny," a smile cracked over my lips, "Us medics look so much worse for wear than the others?"

He leaned back onto his crutches with a calm grin of his own, "I guess I never had time to think about it."

I motioned to my various wounds, "Think all this means I'm brave? Or just stupid?"

He bent down and reached in his bag again, "I think sometimes they are the same thing."

I nodded for a bit until he found whatever he was looking for, "Daryl's here."

He wiped as much of the blood from my arm as he could, "I saw that."

"His brother's missing a piece too. Like us," I reached up to where my ear used to be, "Maybe we can form a club or something." He just laughed and started wrapping gauze around my forearm. It occurred to me that now that I didn't have to go combing the woods, or sit around waiting for the Governor's men to show up, I had no idea what to do with my time. I lazily voiced my worry to Hershel as he taped up the edge of the gauze strip, "I don't know what to do now."

"You need to get some rest, I'd say." Rest. Yes, technically my body needed to recuperate. But if I stop now, if I try to relax, then everything I'm trying to push out of my mind will find its way in. I didn't want to deal with it. Not now. Not until the Governor is dead.

"No," I pulled myself off of the bed, "I can't stop yet. Not now anyway."

"I don't think so," his hand rested on my shoulder, and I saw the sincerity and sweetness in his eyes, "You need time to get your strength back." I knew he was right, but I just couldn't stop. Not yet.

"Besides," I nodded out of the cell, "There's something I need to take care of."

He picked up a water bottle that was sitting on the floor and handed it over to me, "Drink plenty water at least."

I twisted off the cap and took a swig, "Sure thing, Doc."

I went off in search for Daryl. I needed to just get this done, then I could find Carl and maybe he could tell me what happened on his end of the firefight. Or we could go take care of the field with Michonne or something. But first things first…

"Hey," when the brothers looked over to me I suddenly snapped back to awareness. Everything came back into focus; the hushed conversations, the weeps from Carol, the strategic discussion. I looked down at myself and realized that I looked about the same as I felt. My shoddy splint, the blood smears all over my legs and shorts, the large section of shirt that was now lying on the floor of the cell. I was a mess. Everything about me screamed that I shouldn't still be standing. Just get it over with, Annie. Just spit this out and then you can move on. I looked back up to Daryl, my voice coming out weaker than I'd hoped since the shock of seeing him back hadn't faded yet, "I need to talk to you."

"Can't it wait?" I took a deep breath, to regain some of my confidence after his retort.

I shook my head; "I'll make it quick."

"I'll leave you to yourselves," Merle's smirk was undeniable, but what really threw me off was how he winked at me before leaning over to mumble something to Daryl before he walked off.

As my stomach twisted around I figured it would be best to just cough it up as quickly as I could. It came out in a jumble, "We'd be stronger together, you know." My cadence slowed slightly, "Unbeatable once I'm healed up all the way."

"So?" Of course. What had I expected? Did I really think that just because he was with the group that saved me from that hell it had meant anything to him? Just say your piece, Annie. Just say it and get on with your life.

"I get it," I sighed. I guess I could understand where he was coming from. Bitten, raped, who would want to deal with all of that? I had to try though. Really try, just for today. I continued, "After what happened with the bite and in Woodbury I'm probably not very attractive to anyone anymore. I know that. But I'll be good to you." I paused for a second, hoping he'd say something. Anything. No luck. My voice cracked, "Is it because I didn't go back in to save you?" Nothing. "I wanted to, you have to believe me. I hated that I couldn't; hell, I almost did. If I could have gone back, I would have. I swear. I just, I knew I wouldn't make it back out." After the words were out I stood there trying to read his expression. It was impossible. I just stood there waiting for something, some words, anything at all. As the seconds ticked by my eyes fell to my boots.

The silence broke, "Merle told me what happened in there."

I shifted my weight, but couldn't find it in me to look at him, "And?"

"And nothing."

What does that even mean? It might have been the blood loss, or the slow string of long days that had begun to form in my life, but for whatever reason I was tired. I was tired of everything needing to be complicated and confusing. My voice came back with a iota of conviction now, "You saved me, even before you all showed up," I pointed at him, "You, not them." I brushed back a few loose strands of hair from my face, "Now I can stand a lot of things," I stepped closer, "I can stand being alone for months on end. I can deal with everything I've lost. I can stand losing ears and being bitten. I can stand wondering if I'm even human anymore. I don't even mind Death; I think he's actually a reasonable guy. And one day I'll even be able to come to terms with what happened to me in that room," I took another step, putting the last part of me on the line, "But I can't stand this. It's bullshit how convoluted this has become, because it's really simple. We should be together."

There you have it! New chapter! (Super glad the Dixons came to the prison, oh my goodness) Thank you for reading! Be sure to review with your critiques and comments, helps me stick with this story and such.

QUESTION TIME: Annie's running on fumes now, how long do you think she can keep it up before breaking down? How about her attempts at reaching out to Carol? And Annie and Merle, BEST FRIENDS FOREVER (jk?), what do you think about that (talk about potential hilariousness)? And what effect do you think the end conversation will have on the Daryl/Annie dynamic?

I'd love to hear what you have to say! :)