Together, forever
I will never, never let you go
Seem like soon as we say that, we at war
Surrender, is somethin' we don't know
It's somethin' between us, certain fire in our love
It's unreleasable, unbelievable
We're miserable apart, but together it's so hard
All I need to know, oh all I need to know
Olivia sang out loud, her bright pink headphones in her ears as she pushed around the vacuum cleaner across the living room carpet. She had long gotten rid of the cleaning service Fitz hired for her, first blaming it on the fact that she found cleaning therapeutic, but deep down inside she knew she was gradually freeing herself from him.
Every time we break up, we turn around and we make up
Mama wonder when I'm gon' wake up, but he love my face with no make-up
And every time I call him, we end up havin' a problem
And I know I'll probably never solve it, but damn I really love him
She sang her heart out to the lyrics, having turned to Sevyn Streeter's extended play as her saving grace for the past few months. Her voice wasn't perfect and she missed a few notes here and there, but no one couldn't tell her she didn't sound like a million bucks.
I leave him, go back to him, then leave him again
What we doin'? I wish I knew it, I really don't understand
He love me, he love me not. What the hell are we doin'?
I need to know, I need to know
She was about to sing the last run of the chorus when a call came in, cutting off the music on her iPhone. She scoffed, upset someone ruined her moment, when she pulled her phone from her shorts, smiling when she saw the name and picture flashing across the screen. She cut off the vacuum while she slid her finger across the screen, answering the FaceTime call.
"Good morning Olivia!", she sees the rapid movement of a hand waving on her screen.
"Morning Kellz. Why are you so bright and cheery this morning?", she smiles, waving back. It's another one of their almost daily calls.
"Because I'm talking to my most favorite person in the world right now!"
"Yeah right!", the women briefly giggle, before continuing the conversation.
"How you holdin' up today Liv? And how's my little niece/nephew in there?"
"Little Pepperoni is doing fine. He or she is in here moving around like they're in a swimming pool!"
"That's quickening right? I read that in one of the baby books!"
"You're reading baby books too? Boy, you would think you were the one carrying this baby!"
"Yeah yeah, give me a close up of my little munchkin please!"
Olivia sighs, rolling her eyes as she angles the camera to get a shot of her stomach, lifting up her shirt to show off her barely noticeable, yet rounded belly.
"Hi my little Pepperoni! You're getting so big in there! Aunty can't wait for you to come out and I'm sure Mommy and Daddy can't wait either!"
"Yeah, I'm sure...", Olivia mumbles.
"Liv, you're still coming tonight, right?"
"Kelly, I wouldn't miss it for the world. I'm so proud of you! And I hope you don't forget about me and Little P-Roni here when you're up on stage, accepting your Grammy!"
"But of course not! 'Where would I be without my P-Roniiiii?!'", she screams out, mimicking the rapper Ja Rule.
Olivia bursts into a fit of giggles, nearly dropping the phone on the floor. "Kelly Grant, I swear I don't know what I'm going to do with you. You might wanna kill the comedy tonight before I give birth on the floor!", the girls continue to laugh, tears streaming down Olivia's cheeks.
"I can't wait to see you Liv. And my little Pepperoni. Mom and Dad and the twins can't wait to see you either. And Fitz too..."
"Yeah...", Olivia responded, her voice laced with sadness.
"Liv... I know that this is your baby, but he has the right to know..."
"I know. I'm not ready yet. Maybe tonight. I don't know. Hey, can I bring a friend?", she asks suddenly, trying to change the subject.
"Is this friend a male or female?", Kelly asks, a smirk on her face as she raises an eyebrow.
"He's a he..."
"Is he hot?!"
"Somethin' like that..."
"Oh, well then definitely! And make sure he brings another friend, who's even hotter. Just for me!"
"Oh, whatever Kelly!"
"I'm totally kidding. But hey, I've gotta run. Gotta get some last minute stuff in order for tonight. You take care of the precious cargo and I'll you tonight. Love ya sis!"
"Love you too, bye!", she waved at the camera before the screen went black. Forgetting she was previously playing music before she took out her headphones for the call, she was frightened when the loud music started playing out loud.
"I thought the purpose of headphones was to keep the noise at bay. First, I gotta hear your screeching, now I gotta hear hers!"
"Oh shut up, Mr. Grumpy Pants. Help me off the couch, will ya?"
"Oh, but I'm the 'Grumpy Pants', huh?", he reaches for her hands, holding her steady as she lifts herself from the couch. "Morning love", he pulls her in for a hug, kissing her cheek softly. "Have you eaten?"
"Not yet?"
"And why not? You've got that little creature in there starving.."
"I was cleaning. And I was waiting for you.."
"Me? For what?"
"To give me some sugar..", she smiles at him bashfully.
"I've told you about rearranging your cupboards, so you won't have to risk breaking your neck trying to use a step stool to reach the top shelf."
"Oh, just shut it and pass the sugar!"
"Well, when you ask for it like that..."
"Finch, I will skin you with my bare hands and feed you to my unborn child!"
"Sheesh Liv, it was just a joke!", he reaches for the sugar container, placing it on the counter before her. "Now, what are we gonna feed that thing today."
"The usual."
"Liv, aren't you tired of eating pepperoni pizza? You've eaten it every single day!"
"Well, since I'm already gonna look and feel like a huge fat whale for the next few months, I might as well take advantage of it, right?"
"Nonsense Liv, you look absolutely stunning. More stunning than the first day I laid my eyes on you."
She blushes, lowering her head. "You still didn't say I don't look like a whale!"
"You don't look like a whale Olivia."
"I still don't believe you. Anyways, what are you doing tonight."
"Well, not Georgia, that's for sure."
"Gross. Come with me to a party tonight? We get to dress up and there will be lots of rich, famous people."
"And leggy blondes?"
"Yes, 'leggy blondes'", she mimicked his accent and he poked her arm.
"I'm definitely there. So, have you figured out what you're gonna do with the check yet?"
"I've already said I want nothing to do with that money..."
"Olivia. You're sitting here with a million dollar check. You went for blood and you got it. This woman ruined your reputation, almost made you lose your job. I mean, they did offer it back and you turned them down, so technically she made you.."
"Ahem", she clears her throat as a
warning.
"Sorry, I forgot. But, thankfully she's rotting behind bars and you're rolling in dough!"
"The money doesn't matter to me. I don't care about the money. I only care about..."
"So why are you still pushing him away?"
"Just order the pizza...", she hops off the bar stool, walking out of the kitchen and back to her bedroom.
His head falls back on the pillow and his chest heaves. He reaches his arm up to wipe away the sweat the formed on his forehead, at the same time, he's trying to catch his breath. It's been the same pattern: a few minutes of self-pleasuring, followed by the brief moment of satisfaction that quickly turns into shame, guilt, hurt, and loneliness.
It had been three months since she let him go; three months of not speaking to her, of not seeing her, of not being inside her. Three months of ignored e-mails and being sent to voice mail. It was killing him. He knew he messed up, he knew she'd be crazy to take him back, he knew he didn't deserve her. But, he still wanted her, he still needed her. He felt disgusted in himself, having to rely on old memories of their lovemaking to bring him to orgasm.
He rolled out of the bed, heading into his bathroom to take a shower. He stepped in the shower, letting the warm water run over his body as he lathered the soap across his chest. He stuck his head further under the stream flowing from the shower head, springing his curls to life. Looking down, he noticed himself still standing at attention. He sighed, rolling his eyes as he adjusted the water's temperature to get a bit colder.
"Pull it together Fitzgerald. For your sanity, please pull it together." He stepped out the shower and proceeded to get ready for his lunch date.
"Fitzy! Over here!", she flagged him down as he walked in the cafe.
"Hey Melz, afternoon", he placed a soft kiss on her cheek, sitting in the seat in front of her. "Sorry I'm a little late, have you ordered yet?"
"No, I haven't. I was waiting for you. Don't worry about being late, you're here now!"
Ever since the case ended, they had begun to work on rebuilding their friendship. They were both in a similar boat, having causing hurt to someone because they let their horniness lead them astray. For the most part, Fitz was glad that Mellie was back in his life. He needed someone to talk to and these days, Kelly seemed a little different when they spoke, usually rushing him off the phone. He wondered if she was still upset with him about Olivia and hoped that it didn't create a wedge between him and his sister.
"And what will you be having, sir?"
"Umm, cheeseburger and a coke."
"Alright Fitzy, first things first. We've got a few offers on the house. Wanna hear em?"
"I'm not selling the house Mellie, not yet.."
"Fitz, I'd hate to break it to you, but..."
"I said no."
"Fine. Next order of business. Now that Amanda's locked up and your settlement check has finally come in..."
"I don't want the check.."
"What?"
"I don't want it."
"Fitz..."
"I come from money Mellie. And besides that money, I've done pretty well for myself, minus the short decrease in work because of this foolishness, but financially, I'm okay. We went to trail, Amanda's imprisoned for false accusations and I received an unneeded settlement for deformation of character, as well as from the hospital. The money was not the motive, so I have no use for it."
"If you say so Fitz...", she said reluctantly, gnawing on one of her french fries. "Now that we've gotten 'business' out of the way, have you figured out what you're wearing to Kelly's party tonight?"
"A suit, I guess. You?"
"Well, I found this really nice dress..."
"Ugh! I'm a huge, fucking whale!", she screamed out, struggling to conceal her growing tummy and breasts in the dress she pulled over her head.
"Livvie, you need help in there?", he called out, knocking softly on the door. "Do you need me to come in?"
"Sure Stephen, if you can find space to stand around Shamu in here", she answered back angrily.
"Liv", he opened the door, walking in the room to find her sitting on the edge of the bed, her head buried in her lap. "Sweetheart, are you crying?", he asked after hearing a few short sniffles.
She lifts her head up, tears running down her cheeks. "This thing inside of me is ruining my life! I can't control my emotions, I'm finally able to keep down my meals, and my body is changing in ways that I was not even prepared for. He did this to me and he doesn't even have to suffer. I hate his fucking guts!"
"Olivia, you do not hate him. You couldn't possibly love that little baby growing inside of you and hate the man that helped produce him. I know you're hurt and confused and frustrated, but you can't let these things control your life. Well, at least not for the next four months of my little god son or daughter growing inside of you."
"Steven, why would Georgia ever cheat on
you? You're such a good person and you've always been such a great friend."
"People make mistakes Liv. Unfortunately for us, Georgia kept remaking the same mistake over and over again. But don't compare Fitz to my situation. From what I've heard, he's nothing like Georgia. He made ONE mistake Olivia, how much longer are you going to punish him?"
"I don't know."
"Well, let's not worry about that tonight. Let's worry about finding you something to wear that'll make you knock him dead!", he lifted off of the floor, heading into her closet to find her a dress, while Olivia wiped away the tears from her cheeks.
"I'm so happy you're here. Thank you for being here."
"No problem Liv.."
Fitz sat at the bar, nursing a glass of straight scotch. To be honest, he lost count of the amount of drinks he already had since arriving to the party, but he needed something to help ease his nerves. He looked around at the scene before him; family and friends all united to celebrate Kelly getting her very own record deal. Smiling faces and champagne toasts filled the room. He looked at his baby sister, her smile brighter than he'd ever seen it before and he felt happy.
He raised his glass to his mouth, taking a large gulp and letting the strong alcohol burn his throat as he swallowed. His cup was empty and he still felt antsy. "Another one won't hurt, right?" He turned back to the bar, placing his glass on the counter, signaling the bartender for another drink. As he watched his glass being refilled, a scream of excitement pierced through the air.
"Oh my God! OLIVIAA!", a clearly drunk Kelly called out.
Fitz nearly lost his balanced as he turned around, watching as Olivia and Kelly hugged one another. His eyes immediately roamed her body, covered in a silk turquoise strapless sweetheart line dress, that fit snug around her chest, showing off her slightly larger breasts. He involuntarily licked his lips, noticing how the dress flared out, falling to her feet that were adorned in a pair of gold stilettos. Her hair, freshly curled, framed her face that seemed natural, but glowing.
He quickly gulped his drink, beginning to make his way across the room when he noticed her quickly grabbing the hand of a man standing next to her, introducing him to his sister.
"Who the fuck is THAT?!"
AN: I seriously have no excuse to why this update is so late, but here it is guys! I've been getting you guys' comments, reviews, and PMs about me updating. I think I had another episode of temporary writer's block again lol. I do apologize! I hope everyone enjoyed or is enjoying their holidays!
The songs mentioned in this chapter were:
nEXt - Sevyn Streeter
and Put It On Me - Ja Rule Featuring Lil' Mo and Vita
AND if you haven't heard Sevyn's new EP "Call Me Crazy, But…", you seriously need to get your life!
Hope you all enjoyed and as always, thanks for reading and your continuous support!