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Final Fantasty VI: The Sands of Time

Book 2: The Goddess War

Chapter 9 - The Wanderer

9.7 - Love and Hate

It was the darkest hour of the night, but the town of Antissa was bustling with activity, and as bright as day. The magical fires of Cerberus still raged, and withstood every effort of the villagers to extinguish them. They were waning without their master's power to fuel them, but nothing the villagers did hastened their gradual demise. In the meantime, Antissa was burning.

Into this chaotic scene Maduin stepped carefully. He knew he was at least partially responsible for this disaster, and did not want to meet the accusing eyes of any townsfolk. Elphis was hurt, though, and he had to find somewhere, someone who could help her. But everywhere he looked, all he saw were panicked people, running from one stubborn flame to another in a desperate attempt to save their homes.

There was nothing to do but quietly help, and hopefully not make a bigger mess than he already had. He knew instinctively that his magic should be able to quench the magic of the dead hound, but he wasn't sure how to go about doing it. And more importantly, he was exhausted. He doubted he had enough power to put out more than a few blazes. But he had to try. This was the closest thing to a home he had left.

Holding Elphis gently under one arm, he tried to cast a wave of coldness at the nearest flame. The attempt was feeble, and it took every ounce of strength Maduin had just to put out the medium sized fire. There was no way he could do this.

Clutching the Nacre at his throat, Maduin once more tried to release its power, hoping for a miracle. The string of pearls glowed at his touch, but Maduin felt no surge of power, heard no heavenly voices, saw no miracles. He let the Nacre go, and hung his head, at a loss. How could the gods be so cruel? Even Elia, who seemed the kindest of them all, was silent to his pleas.

Maduin shifted Elphis back into his arms and moved cautiously through the village. He knew there was a local doctor here, but he knew not whether his house was still intact, of if he was even still alive. Along the way he stamped out what small fires he could, and even grabbed a bucket of water that had been left in the chaos and did what any living thing could do to put out the flames. His attempts were no more successful than the villagers, but at least he was trying. If anyone saw him lurking through the flame-lined streets, they said nothing.

Eventually he found what was left of the doctor's house. It was almost completely destroyed, but the doctor was alive, and treating an army of wounded outside its charred remains. He only had a few people to help him, and very little supplies. Trying to fight off the growing tide of burned, wounded and dying was as impossible a task as trying to put out the fires.

Maduin crept onto the edge the triage camp the doctor had set up, trying not to be noticed. Most people were either too busy or in too much pain to pay attention to anything around them, but one person saw him as soon as he stepped into the clearing. In fact, it seemed he had been discovered even before he stepped out of the shadows.

"You there, Esper, or whatever you call yourself," the voice hissed from a few feet away, as hidden in the shadows as Maduin. "Stay there and don't show yourself, you can't do any good here."

Maduin looked around, but saw no one. In a moment, he felt a light tap at his elbow. Whirling around, he saw the strange woman from the battlefield. She was apparently unharmed, but her face was sooty, and her once-immaculate black dress had singe marks and more than a few holes burned into it. Up close, he realized the woman was not nearly as young as he had supposed from her graceful movements and lithe body. She was in her forties at least, but had the energy of a wild stallion dancing in her face and eyes.

"Stop staring!" She said in a sharp, clear voice that didn't carry one step beyond where the two stood. "If I thought you had a single gil to your name, I'd make you pay for a new dress. If you were any kind of fighter, this wouldn't have happened." She straightened out her tattered dress, grimacing as her fingers found new holes.

Maduin was speechless. The lady was as sharp and to the point as her weapons. "Who...?"

The lady cut him off. "Again with the questions? Just shut up for a moment and let me ask the questions."

Maduin mouth snapped shut in surprise.

"Now then, let me be blunt," The lady laughed primly at her words, as if she had just made a joke. "You are Dune Karn, correct?"

"How do you...?" Maduin began, but was cut off again by a fierce glare from the woman. "Yes." He answered like an obedient pet.

"Where is the Lord Dunn-Raven?" she asked imperiously, a dagger flashing from between her fingers.

Maduin had no idea who she was talking about. "I have never heard that name before. But please...this girl is wounded, I have to..."

"Ah, the girl!" the lady exclaimed, veering away from her question and hovering in front of Maduin to look at his precious cargo. "She is blind, correct? I watched her with you before the fighting began. She has a remarkable feel for her surroundings, and is absolutely fearless!"

"Please..." Maduin said piteously.

"Don't beg to me," the lady said coldly. "Don't ever beg to me, understand?"

Maduin was taken aback by the unexpected callousness. His eyes went involuntarily to the dagger in her hand again. Who was this woman?

Following his eyes, the woman smiled. "Yes, that's right. I am not some sappy woman to fawn over children. I am a killer." Her eyes went back to Elphis. "But, this girl has remarkable potential. The Stradivari could do wonders with her..."

Maduin suppressed his natural inclination to ask who she meant, and simply repeated his request more firmly. "The girl, I have to help her."

"You can do whatever you like, but you will tell me what I need to know first." The woman's face regained its hardness, and she abruptly went back to her questioning.

"I told you, I don't know this Lord you named." Maduin repeated impatiently. He had to get Elphis to the doctor, even if he had to go through this woman to do it.

"Oh, but you do," the lady said slyly. "He went by the cover name Agent Phantom while he was under contract to the Narsillians. His mission was to follow you." She pointed one accusing finger straight at Maduin's face.

Maduin thought back to his days following the orders of the Committee, and still drew a blank. He had never heard anyone mention an Agent Phantom. "I still don't know who you mean."

The lady huffed in frustration at Maduin's ignorance. "Hmph, I guess 'Phantom' did his job a little too well. Either that or you're even more oblivious than I thought. His last message to us was that he had come into contact with you directly, but had been repelled and forced to flee. That was almost five months ago, on board the vessel called the Maiden of the Sea, and we haven't heard from him since. Where is he now?"

There was a murderous gleam in her eyes that told Maduin if she did not like his answer, the results could be deadly. But he did remember the unknown intruder from the Maiden, and he remembered an intruder on the Figaro as well. It was believed by the crew that these two intruders were one and the same - a ghost-like figure who evaded all attempts at capture or identification. This must be who the woman meant, and Maduin did indeed know the pathetic fate of her comrade.

"I won't tell you anything until Elphis is safe." Maduin said with a boldness he didn't really feel.

The woman laughed merrily and hid her lethal daggers back in her pockets. "Ah, so the whelp does have a bit of a spine! Good, good!" She stopped laughing suddenly, a very business like look on her face now. "Very well. I will take the girl to the doctor myself and see that she is treated. As soon as she is out of danger, you will tell me what you know."

"Thank you." Maduin said, handing the girl to the stranger reluctantly. He certainly did not trust her, but at the moment, she was the only person offering to help.

"Your heart makes you weak, Esper. If you ever want to realize your warrior's potential, I suggest you rid yourself of it." the woman said, taking the girl from his hands quickly.

"You sound like that three-headed monster now."

"He was right, but he couldn't follow his own advice," the lady quipped coolly. "I saw the way your fight ended, and it was disgraceful. The dog was consumed with his own hatred, and died because of it. Love and hate...both must be discarded to become a perfect warrior."

"I have no desire to become a warrior of any kind. I only want to be left alone, and to protect the ones I care about."

"Very well," the lady said, flipping her wild red hair unconcernedly. "Do as you please, but remember, I will be back tomorrow, and we will talk. Until then...follow your 'heart' and see where it gets you." She turned and left with Elphis in her hands, laughing rudely.

Maduin watched her closely, making sure she kept her promise. True to her word, she gave the girl to the doctor, and then blended into the throng of people, vanishing like a specter in the night. He did not like the woman's attitude, but she had saved his life, and now Elphis's as well.

With Elphis out of his hands, there was only one place left to go. Maduin melted into the wall of flames behind him and made for the Laperdeau's house. He could do nothing about the fire, but it could do nothing to stop him, either. No one would see him by this path, of that he was sure. When he reached the house, he found it half destroyed by the fire. The thatched roof was gone, and there was one wall missing, but the fire guttered out before it could consume the entire house. Much of the village was in the same state. By morning, half the town would be destroyed, but there would still be half a town left to rebuild what had been lost.

As Maduin approached the house, he spotted Mr. Laperdeau picking through the blackened rubble inside. The old man had bandages around his waist, chest, and left arm, and a blood-soaked bandage around his head, but he was alive, and determined to put his life back together as soon as possible.

"Mr. Laperdeau! Are you alright?" Maduin called out, appearing from the flames like a demon.

Mr. Laperdeau started at his name being called, turning warily from his work. When he saw Maduin materialize in front of him, he grabbed his sword in his right hand and waved it threateningly.

"Mr. Laperdeau! Max, it's me...Dune!" Maduin said, startled himself at Mr. Laperdeau's reaction.

Mr. Laperdeau sighed and lowered his weapon, but did not lower his guard. "Dune, why have you come back? Has anyone seen you?"

"N-no...I didn't think my presence would help things. I've tried putting out the fires, but I don't have the strength."

"It wouldn't matter." Mr. Laperdeau sighed again, turning back to his work. "I would leave now if I were you."

"I'm not leaving without seeing Mae!" Maduin burst out. "Where is she, is she safe?"

"You still don't have a clue, do you? Mae is fine." Mr. Laperdeau said tiredly, then shot Maduin a dark look very unlike his usual peaceful self. "As is my wife, thank you for asking."

"I...I'm sorry, but it's been a bit hectic for me." Maduin said uncomfortably, scratching the spot on his nose where he once wore glasses. "I've defeated the monster, and the town is safe from his attacks now."

"Is it?" Mr. Laperdeau said, throwing down the broken picture frame he had been handling. "Look around. It will take years before Antissa is back to the way it once was. And for too many families, it will never be the same. We were lucky, but the majority of the men of the village died in that fight."

"I can't bring back the dead, but I can help rebuild the town. With my power..."

"Your power is the problem! Don't you understand? You're not welcome here." Mr. Laperdeau passed his hand over his face, calming himself. "Dune, everyone knows what you did for Antissa tonight, but they all know what you did to it, as well. I have no ill will towards you, but my wife and most of the others don't feel the same."

"Mrs. Laperdeau," Maduin said slowly, thinking. "She's turned the town against me, hasn't she? What has she been saying?"

"The usual things," Mr. Laperdeau replied. "Nothing they didn't already believe. She's been busy while you were up in the mountains."

"And Mae?"

"My child has always been her mother's daughter. She is as stubborn about her opinion of you as Elle is with hers."

"And that opinion is?"

"That you're a monster. And that she loves you. Beyond that, I do not know."

"I have to see her."

"I won't stop you. I can't stop you. But, Dune..." Mr. Laperdeau stopped his work and walked up to Maduin, putting his hand on his son-in-law's cold chest. Glowing blue blood still flowed down his body in tired trickles, passing through Mr. Laperdeau's fingers. He took his hand away, inspecting the strange substance. It was definitely not the blood of something human.

"Don't hurt her." he said at last, turning away and going back to his futile labors. After a minute of silence, he said quietly over his shoulder, "She's out back, tending what's left of the garden."

Maduin said nothing, walking past the man and around the ruined face of the house. He expected Mrs. Laperdeau to jump out at any moment to scream at him, blame him for everything that had happened, tell him to leave and never come back. The woman had never forgiven him for taking Mae away from her quiet life and into the bustling world of Narsille. He was a stranger even then, and even worse, an intellectual. If he didn't earn his bread by tilling fields or building houses, he was worthless in her eyes. Antissa had no use for scientists, and neither did Elle Laperdeau.

But Mae had made her choice, and Mrs. Laperdeau grudgingly accepted it. The woman had her honor, and if her daughter chose to marry someone like Dune, she felt it was Mae's duty to be as faithful and constant in her marriage as Mrs. Laperdeau was in her own. She had put up with the marriage back then, but now she felt Dune Karn was dead, and this ghost from the past had no place here.

The recent catastrophes both in Narsille and Antissa had only cemented her opinion of both city life and himself. Narsille's dependence on technology and the lazy lifestyles of its inhabitants were just as much to blame for the current crisis as monsters like Cerberus and Maduin, according to Mrs. Laperdeau. To her, Dune as Maduin represented everything that was wrong with the world combined into one person, and he knew she would never forgive him now, or even abide him. She would fight him with every weapon she had, and right now her strongest weapon was her own daughter.

Thankfully, Mrs. Laperdeau was nowhere in sight, but that didn't mean she wasn't waiting somewhere, ready to pounce at a moment of weakness. As Maduin turned the corner of the house, he saw what was left of the tiny garden that Mae had always tended with care back when she was young. Mrs. Laperdeau had kept it safe while she was gone, but now it was ruined. Most of the plants were burned to nothing, and the ground charred past the point of ever growing anything again. There was a single resilient rosebush still poking through a small patch of untainted soil in a far corner, and that was where Maduin found his wife.

It was right here where he had first laid eyes on Mae Laperdeau, tending her flowers the same as now. Perhaps that was why she had retreated here, hoping to find refuge in one of the few places with pleasant memories she had left. It almost seemed too cruel to intrude on her moment of peace amidst the destruction around her, but now was the only time he had left.

Maduin walked as softly as his size allowed him. He stopped just outside the garden, and stepped back into the shadows again, not wanting Mae to see him. He would never forget the look on her face the first time she had seen him as an Esper.

"Mae..." he called out from the darkness, watching her raven-black hair jerk back as if he had pulled it. Her head slowly turned around, then stopped before Maduin could see her face.

"Why did you come back?" she said without looking away from her flowers.

"I had to see you. I had to make sure you were safe."

"I was safe!" Mae yelled, her voice breaking. "You shouldn't have come here."

"I love you," Maduin said simply, hoping that would be all the explanation he needed. He was still hidden from her sight, and she made no attempt to find him.

"You loved me enough to leave me alone in Narsille, and go off on those damn expeditions. And look what it got us." Mae bent lower to the ground and carefully straightened a drooping rose. The petals fell apart in her hand, and she dashed the dead thing to the ground in frustration. "Just leave!"

"I was a fool, but you have to believe that I never stopped thinking of you. Even after...everything...I still never stopped thinking about you. Please, just look at me."

"Do you think if I just turn around and look at you, everything will be forgiven? You've destroyed everything in our life, even yourself. Our apartment is gone, all my Narsillian friends dead, and now, you've done the same thing here. Everywhere you go, chaos follows!"

"I am trying to protect everyone, not destroy them! Please, you have to understand!" Maduin slowly stepped out of the shadows as he pleaded, but Mae stayed rooted to the earth like one of her dying flowers.

"I don't want to understand!" she shouted. Her hands were on her ears. "Don't you see, it doesn't matter? You mean well, but you're caught up in something I don't understand, and don't want to understand. I just wanted to be your wife, have kids, live a quiet life in a beautiful city." For the first time, she turned her head in her husband's direction, but did not look at him. Her eyes were glued to the ground, afraid. "Can you honestly say you can give me that now, looking like...that?"

"I can try. I don't know what this body can do. Maybe..."

"No!" Mae said vehemently, shaking her head. Maduin could see the falling tears reflecting in the fire light. "I don't want to try! I..." Mae struggled with herself, willing herself to raise her head, to look at the monster now standing over her.

"Mae...just look at me. I am still your husband." Maduin said softly, reaching out his hand to touch her. But he could not, not without looking into her eyes first.

With a monumental effort Mae succeeded in lifting her face, but her eyes were shut. She started to open them, but as soon as she perceived the giant form looming over her, she shut them tight and turned her head. "I can't see you like this. Why won't you just leave me alone!"

Maduin couldn't take it anymore, and grabbed her gently by the shoulders, urging her to look him in the face. "Mae, look. I can't leave you here without knowing for sure."

"Dune," Mae said, feeling faint as the foreign claws touched her. "This is too much. I can't live the life you're leading now. There's no room in it for me, and I have no room in my life for you. Why are you dragging this out? Leave!"

Maduin soften his grip, but did not let go. "This is your mother's doing, isn't it? She's convinced you that I'm nothing but a monster. That you'll die if you stay with me. It's not true!"

"Wake up, Dune!" Mae shouted. "Look at yourself! You are a monster!" Her eyes were open, and they were staring intensely at Maduin's face. There was a look of deep disgust in them, and Maduin winced at the awful look that stole across her delicate features.

"I am not just a monster, Mae. There is more to me than this body." Maduin felt weak, and wasn't sure if he even believed his own words.

"I loved you, Dune. But it's just not enough. The man I loved is gone, and along with it the life I had wanted to live with him."

"No! I am still here. We have to at least try! Forget the rest of the world, let it burn for all I care. I still want to make this work."

"Let go of me, Dune. You're hurting me."

Maduin quickly let go of Mae, and stepped back in horror. She rubbed her shoulders where he had been squeezing harder than he had realized.

"There's nothing left." She said calmly, averting her eyes from Maduin's face. "I've thought of this moment ever since I left Narsille. I've tried to find some way to make it work. It just isn't possible. A human and an...Esper? It's a fantasy, and we're both too old to kid ourselves."

"How do you know unless we try?" Maduin said frantically. "How do you know?"

Mae touched her breast, still not looking at Maduin. "The heart knows, and that's enough. It's over."

"Mae, I can't just leave you here! I won't!" Maduin stepped forward, accidentally crushing several struggling flowers.

"You will." This was not Mae's voice, but the harsher, older voice of her mother. She had been inside the house, but now she felt her presence was required to put this scene out of its misery. "Leave, beast."

"I will not! I won't leave this town until it is safe."

"It won't be safe until you leave! Why can't you understand that this is all your fault?" Mrs. Laperdeau shouted, her eyes blazing with hate.

"What if another Esper comes here? What will you do?"

"We'll do what we must, without you!" Mrs. Laperdeau spat, shaking her finger at him as she walked towards the garden. "We are not completely helpless. And if we must, we'll leave, and go somewhere else. You gave the men false hope, and led them into a needless battle. How many died tonight because of the bloodlust you instilled in them?"

"I never intended..." faltered Maduin.

"That's your problem! You just stumble into a situation without thinking of how it may affect us! You did the same thing when you blundered into this village ten years ago, and now you return, just as impudent and full of a man's pride as you were before! Just go away!"

"I won't leave Mae here. It's too dangerous."

"And where would you take her? The mountains? The hellhole behind those gates? The worse place on earth for my daughter is wherever you are!"

"I..." Maduin stuttered. He had nothing to say to that. He looked back at Mae for support, but she had turned to stone, ignoring the fight. "Mae, please..."

But she said nothing.

"I can't leave like this. Surely there is some place for me here?"

"There isn't," Mrs. Laperdeau said savagely, poking her hard finger right into Maduin's chest. "You have no place here, among people. If Mae can't accept you, do you really think any one else in this village will? After what you've done?"

"I know one person who will stand by me." Maduin said, remembering Elphis. He looked back at Mae again, urging her to say something. "If Elphis can accept me, can't you?"

Mae shuddered, but remained silent. This was agony to her, and she just wanted this unpleasant, but necessary moment to end.

"Elphis is only slightly above the likes of you," Mrs. Laperdeau continued. "She is a vagabond, stealing and leeching off our already strained resources without giving anything back. Why don't the both of you just vanish?"

Maduin said nothing, and only stared at Mae. "Will you let your mother speak for you, Mae? Don't you have anything to say? Do you really want me to just vanish?"

Mae shook her head, but Maduin couldn't tell if she was agreeing or disagreeing with his words, or if she even heard them at all.

Maduin lowered his shoulders, and shook his own head. "If I leave, I won't come back this time. There will be no hope for us, no third chance. I don't want to leave you, Mae! Say something!"

Mrs. Laperdeau walked over to her daughter and put her arms around her, trying to get her to stand. "Come, Mae, you don't need to say anything to this brute." She gave one last venomous look at Maduin and ushered her daughter back towards the house.

"Wait!" Maduin shouted desperately from the ruined garden. "Mae, don't leave me like this! I am still your husband! I am still Dune!"

Mae jerked as if shot, but did not turn her head or stop her slow progress back into the safety of her house. Then she finally broke her silence.

"My husband is dead."

Her words were like daggers, and Maduin felt a part of him die as he heard the softly spoken death sentence.

And then she was gone, the door slammed shut against the night. Maduin stood by himself for several minutes with the crushed roses underneath his feet and the smell of death in his nostrils. The words echoed in his mind endlessly, growing louder and louder until he had to shout to drown them out. His roar sounded completely inhuman, and he made no attempt to mask the feral tones. Mae was right, her husband was dead. Dune Karn was no more. There was only the beast, the Esper, Maduin.

In wild anguish Maduin launched himself into the sky, utterly destroying any sign of the garden or its dead roses. All that was left was a crater, his grave.

"Why have you done this!" Maduin railed at the heavens as he rose higher and higher, a blazing blue comet in the night sky. "You could have stopped this! None of this had to happen!" Maduin rose higher, reaching the cloud layer and shooting through it, heedless of his rapidly waning strength.

"Why? Why am I here! Answer me, dammit!" Maduin exploded in grief, letting his cold energy ripple away from him into the clouds. He rose above the clouds on wings of pure chaotic energy, letting his power pour out into the surrounding sky with reckless abandon. The clouds recoiled from his assault, shaking with an almost alive intensity.

In a moment he was spent, and fell to the earth like a rock. Where he landed he didn't know or care. The force of the impact and his own utter exhaustion knocked him senseless, and the pathetic creature was lost to the world for the time being. No one disturbed him in his bed of destruction. More than a few people spat on him as they passed, hoping that he might be dead.

While Maduin lay unconscious on the cold ground, the skies above him opened briefly, perhaps disturbed by his passing. A warm rain began to fall lightly over the town of Antissa. The light rain soon became a downpour, but the drops fell gently, soothing all they touched. The fires abated, the wounded gained some of their strength, and the dying quietly passed on without pain. Those with fear and sorrow in their hearts suddenly felt lighter, like a loving parent had put their arms around them and told them everything would be alright.

High above the bleeding town, deep inside the seething clouds above, the shape of a massive face appeared, stern and roiling with suppressed emotion. Hovering in front of the face in the clouds was the faint shimmering figure of a breathtaking beauty, clothed only in gossamer threads of soft cerulean blue. Whether either apparition was really there or not, no one knew for sure, but everyone who saw the vision was touched profoundly.

"I weep for all my children," the female vision said softly to the clouds.

"We were told not to interfere," the giant face in the clouds said in smoldering tones.

"Listen to them wail, brother," the woman said sadly. "I cannot stand it any longer. Even if it is only the briefest respite, I must show them that they have not been wholly abandoned."

"You always had too much of a heart for these simple beings, sister. Emotion will ever be the downfall of all things, including the gods." the male voice of the face in the storm said, his own hard features softening. "Altimus will not be pleased."

"I cry for whom I please, Uranos." the shimmering female vision returned in her gentle, but powerful voice.

"So be it," the male voice said, the face turning inwards and melting back into the clouds. "Adamastor, hurry and finish your task, and leave this cursed realm."

"Yes, Master," a second male voice said, rumbling from within the storm. "Mistress?"

"You may go," the female voice said, now bodiless in the empty skies above Antissa. " I have done all I can."

And as quickly as the rain had started, it ceased, leaving not one ember of fire below and not one cloud above.

The healing rain had left its mark on Antissa, and when the sun rose in a few hours, a newfound sense of hope would pervade the village, if only for a time. There was still much to be done, and much to be mourned. The rain would soothe the weary hearts of the people tonight, but with the rising sun, the grim work of rebuilding would begin in earnest, and her tears would be joined by the hundreds of men, women, and children who's lives had been altered forever by forces they couldn't even begin to comprehend.

For how many more towns would the tears of Elia fall before the madness of her fallen brethren was spent?