"Did you ever see The Magic Flute?" Myka asks.
"No, I've never really enjoyed German-language operas."
"I think you'll like it." she confidently adds. Tomorrow afternoon, we have a flight out of Munich, heading back home after a few days in Bavaria. Myka suggests we do a quick detour to Bregenz for a night of opera on the lake, enlisting Claudia to pull some strings to get us a room in Lindau for the night and tickets to a performance of The Magic Flute. Myka always excels at coming up with excellent last-minute date ideas and this one is certainly at the top of the list.
We stand side-by-side on the top deck of the ferry, looking out at Lake Constance as the sun is setting. Lucky for us, the weather is cool and there is no rain. I'm thankful Myka encouraged me to wear my old grey linen jacket. I dislike it immensely; however, it is perfect for weather and times such as this. Myka is busy looking out at the water, glaring at the lights of the towns dotting the coastline. Sometimes, I enjoy merely watching her face as she studies something. Her focus, her mind, her instinct processing everything surrounding her, it's what makes her an exceptional Warehouse agent.
I try to forget what happened the last time we came to this part of the world and look at my wife. I press on once more. "Penny for your thoughts?"
Myka turns her head, curls blowing every direction in the gentle wind and she takes my hand in hers. "I love you." She nudges her head against my shoulder.
"Love you too." She gets quiet again, turning her direction back towards the lake. "Myka, it seems as though something is troubling you." She keeps hold of my hand and we continue looking out at the lake. After a couple sighs, swigs of water from the container she always carries and fidgeting legs against the railings, I can no longer have her stay so silent. "What's the matter?"
"I don't want to go home tomorrow." Myka doesn't whine when she says it, she's resolved to her responsibilities and work. One can sense from her tone how much she has enjoyed our side trips and spending time together. "We're still catching up on things. I feel as though we have spent so little time together recently with your Regent activities and my overnight cases. I miss you."
Rather than stand together by the guardrail, I gently tug Myka's hand towards a nearby vacant bench and we sit. Myka snuggles closer to me, putting her head on my shoulder. She doesn't usually partake in this sort of behavior in public, but since the incident a couple months ago where she was badly injured, Myka has been particularly "hands on" with me when we go out.
"I've missed you too. You know I don't like being apart from you at all." I assure her whilst kissing the top of her curls. Her arm moves around my waist to tightly hold me. "You recall last month? We had a very similar conversation and we both promised to be more forthcoming with these discussions?"
She nods her head against my shoulder.
"I'm trying, Helena. Sometimes though, I shut down, I get introspective and don't say much, but I'm working on that. Even though it's so hard when you're away for a couple weeks and all we get to do is e-mail, text or Skype. Ever since the spring, it just seems to me that you're going away a bit more. So when we finally get a chance to be away from it all, I never want it to end."
Myka is holding back tears, trying to be so strong. It's not that I want to be away, it's that at times, it's necessary for work. My cases and missions aren't dangerous ( I do promise her that much at least); however, they tend to keep me away from Myka whenever she seems to need me the most. At first, I thought it would be alright, something to which we would grow accustom (sometimes she goes off with Pete, sometimes I go off to...wherever it is it appears I'm needed), but each time we are apart and then come back together, Myka needs me a bit more each time.
I find when I'm away and return, I'm needing her just as badly.