Chapter 11: Beyond the Grave
Authors Note: Thanks for the reviews on the previous chapter. Turns out that people liked it a lot more than I had originally expected. This chapter may take a while to write as a) I am ill with flu and b) I still have to go to school. In addition as I am writing this, does not appear to be working so I cannot read anything or any messages today but hopefully it will be up and running once I finally complete this chapter. So sorry if this is a while. Once again this is a filler chapter, just something to fill the gap in between this chapter and another one, yet I have absolutely no idea what chapter 12 will contain yet but hopefully it will be good. Anyway I hope you enjoy and here is chapter 11!
10th June 2005
Ron looked around the clean quiet waiting room silently. Normally it would never be this peaceful, there would be people running back and forth to the main desk asking if there was any news. Or people would head in desperate for a room, clutching one another's hands tightly. Otherwise there would be healers racing from room to room quickly with clipboards and in lime green uniforms. Being in St. Mungo's was never the most pleasant of atmospheres. It tended to feel uncomfortably cold and was a place where happiness was elevated or was drained away from the people who were affected. Today was different though, calmer, brighter than it would have been in any other situation. Today it was them, he and Hermione and he did not think he had ever been happier or more nervous to be in this hospital before.
Hermione appeared to be more nervous than he was, but that was understandable. She was pale, and her palms were colder than normal as he reached for her hand gently. He squeezed it softly and she turned her head to look at him, after a few moments of eye connection, a small smile crept onto her face before she glanced away again, carefully moving a strand of long, wavy chestnut hair behind her ear. It was not just nerves that were over powering every other emotion in their bodies, it was also fear as well. They had waited so long for this and had been elated when they had found out that they were finally going to have a child of their own. To find out that something was wrong or that something had happened would be devastating for both of them.
"Hermione Weasley?" Lily Moon called they slowly got up and followed her into the same room they had been in five months ago when they had experienced the hurt and heartbreak that had briefly torn them apart. After that day, Hermione had some what kept Ron at a distance, thinking that it the pain would only increase if they were closer to one another. She would talk, and they would speak contently to one another, but she was not Hermione. In that time, Ron felt that she was never the Hermione he met on the Hogwarts Express or that he inevitably fell in love with or that he married. She was not herself and although she was there, he had never missed her so much before.
"So, may I first say congratulations on you being pregnant." Lily beamed and both Ron and Hermione laughed.
"Thank you." Hermione smiled.
"Do you know how far along you are?" Lily then went onto enquire.
"We think that it is around 10 weeks but that was down to bad mental calculation and a muggle pregnancy test." Ron spoke for Hermione. "Are you able to tell us exactly?"
"Actually I can. Do you mind just lying down on the bed Hermione please? Oh and do you mind rolling up your top." Lily asked and Hermione slowly sat upon the black table like bed and lay back cautiously and folded her top over carefully. There was a computer screen next to the bed facing them as Ron sat on a chair next to where Hermione lay. Lily moved slightly closer and glanced quickly at Hermione.
"This might be a little cold. Don't worry though." Healer Moon smiled as she placed the muggle device on Hermione's stomach and moved it around slowly.
"Is this something that muggles use?" Ron asked as Hermione tensed up and he squeezed her hand.
"Yes. Although we have magic and we could use other methods, turns out that the muggles are rather smart and this is the best way of doing these kinds of things." Lily informed him and he nodded. She continued to move the handle of the ultrasound machine slowly in search of something.
"Come on, little one. Where are you?" Lily murmured to herself and Hermione became paler than before upon hearing this. "This sometimes happens, it will not take long though." She reassured her as soon as she saw Hermione's expression. A few seconds later, a beating sound became apparent in the room and Ron and Hermione looked between one another confusedly before turning back to Healer Moon as if for an answer.
"What is that?" Ron asked
"That is your baby's heartbeat." And they all fell silent. Neither Ron nor Hermione had ever heard such thing before and so they knew that it must be a good sign. "There is something else I would like to show you two too." Lily added and a few seconds later a black and white image appeared on the computer screen. As the healer moved the handle part of the machine, the image changed as well. It was not very easy to tell things apart but amongst everything, was a white tiny shape that stood out from everything else they could see.
"That is your son or daughter." Lily informed them and Hermione felt her heart stop as they both somewhat saw to an extent their child for the very first time. Obviously it was too soon to know what gender their child would be but the point was that they were there and they could see them. Although they knew full well that their son or daughter existed, the fact that they were visible meant something. It was something unexplainable, but both Ron and Hermione were sure it was something.
"Wow." Hermione whispered as she looked through misty pupils to find that Ron's azure eyes were a lot shinier than usual and she was certain that they felt the same way as they looked at the live image on the computer screen in utter amazement.
"I can print a photograph if you wish to have one. A lot of people normally collect them to see how much the baby has developed." Healer Moon said and Ron pulled his eyes away before answering her gesture.
"Yes please." Ron replied and she turned away before handing him two copies of the ultrasound as Hermione sat up and pulled her top back over her stomach.
"If you do not mind me asking, how has your health been Hermione?" Lily enquired.
"Good, I have been sick once I think but other than that I have been perfectly fine." Hermione smiled and Lily nodded in response.
"Glad to hear it although the sickness may be on the increase. Are there any questions that either of you have?" Lily asked and Ron looked over at Hermione before answering.
"Actually, we were discussing it before we came in this morning. Hermione and I were both wondering at how many weeks we can find out whether the baby is a boy or a girl, should we wish to at the time?" Ron questioned
"Babies develop their genders between 11 and 13 weeks, so it is likely that by around 14 weeks it will be accurate whether your child is a boy or a girl and so four weeks. That is your next check up as well but I will only tell you the gender should you wish to find out. Do not worry it is optional. If you do have any concerns or there are any symptoms that worry you in the meantime please feel free to come here to talk to me." Lily answered and Ron and Hermione both stood up to leave.
"Thank you, Lily." Hermione said as they quickly hugged before Ron and Hermione left, large smiles worn of both of their faces.
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"Are you okay?" Harry asked as Hermione sat down next to him. After departing from one of the top floors of St. Mungo's Ron and Hermione had parted ways as well. Hermione had been given the day off due to her appointment taking place but Ron headed to the Ministry of Magic to do a half day in the Auror Office. Hermione loved living with Ron but did often enjou the quietness of the atmosphere when he was not in the house, however today was different. Today it felt too quiet like something or someone was missing. Maybe it was because they had just had a moment together that neither of them would ever forget – sort of seeing their son or daughter for the first time but it did not feel right to be alone.
She had been thankful the day before when Harry had asked her if she wanted to come over the next day. Ron and Harry didn't always have the same days off work and this was one of those days where Harry was and Ron was not. Ginny had gone out and so it was a day where both of them were alone. They did not often see each other alone apart from conversations at the ministry or times like this. Normally they would also be with Ron and Ginny, and now there was also Harry and Ginny's baby son James as well.
"It is great. Just really, really great." Hermione beamed and Harry looked at her questionably, whilst trying to work out the reasons behind her surge of happiness.
"Oh, how was your appointment?" Harry remembered and Hermione's smile grew even more. "Is everything alright?" With anyone else this conversation would have just suddenly become weird by the last statement but this was different. This was Harry, the brother she never had and she was the sister he never had. Ginny was Ron's sister and they told her things, and Harry was her non genetically related brother so she had never felt awkward in such scenarios. Instead Hermione reached into her bag and pulled out a small black and white photograph and handed it to Harry. He stared at it for a few moments in silence before he looked up and back at Hermione.
"Is that..." He trailed off and Hermione continued his sentence where her best friend had left off.
"That is your niece or nephew." Hermione added and Harry hugged her tightly before she responded by embracing him back cheerfully.
"I am proud of you both. I really am. You have both come so far. From truly despising one another to getting married and now you are having a child together. I know Ginny and I have said this to you both many times in the past ten years but we are really happy for you. It was obvious for a while that you really liked one another, you were just circling around one another not knowing what to say to the other when the moment was right and there were times when you would have a terrible argument and we all wondered if you ever would get together. But you have and everything is working out for you both and everyone is so pleased for you both because out of all of us, you two have waited the longest for this and you really deserve it." Harry said and Hermione felt tears sting her eyes.
"I love you. Not in the same way as Ron but I really love you, and Ginny, and of course James. And you are the best sort of brother I could have ever got." Hermione sniffed and wrapped an arm around him once again. They sat in silence for a while before Harry began to speak once again.
"I take it that the way you told us all that you are pregnant did not go exactly to plan?" Harry chuckled and Hermione sighed, shaking her head.
"Anything but the way that had been intended. We had no idea what we were going to saying when the time came to it, but arguing so loudly that everyone accidentally finds out was not how we ever wanted it to go. Why does it never work out in situations like this for us? Even when we got engaged Angelina spotted the ring just as we were about to tell everyone." Hermione replied
"It does not ever work out for you two because you are Ron and Hermione. You do everything the same way you have always done when you are together – problematically and unintentionally. The Romione way shall we say?" Harry told her.
"We told my parents before that and that went a lot better than when we told everyone else at the Burrow." Hermione said.
"Can I ask you something?" Harry wondered
"Of course you can. Go on." Hermione prompted as Harry looked down and fiddled with his hands.
"How did you feel telling your parents? You are a lot closer to your parents than I will ever be and Arthur and Molly are like secondary parents although I had ones of my own, but how did you have the confidence to tell them? It is not exactly a comfortable subject when you think carefully about it." Harry questioned and Hermione looked at him expressionlessly as she realised what he was essentially trying to say to her.
"You have not told your mum and dad about James have you?" Hermione whispered and Harry shook his head.
"No."
"Harry you really should tell them, even if you are not telling them telling them. Does that not mean something, to be able to tell them that you have a son?" She continued quietly.
"I want to, but I do not at the same time. It feels odd because there are so many things that they should have been around for. They should have been around for my first day at Hogwarts, meeting Ginny, and Ginny and I getting married. But they were not. This feels more important than any of those other things, because they should be here for something like this. They should be James' grandparents. But they are not and I am used to not having parents but this brings up things that I have never really thought about before." Harry answered. "How did you do it?"
"I don't know. I really do not know how I did it because I was that nervous that I almost backed out of it twice but Ron was motivating. He was the one that said that if we did not tell them now we would have to tell them at some point." Hermione said before allowing her eyes to drift away from Harry's. "Harry I know that that the circumstances are very different. I know... I know that your parents are dead, but you know from all the magic that we have witnessed in the past fourteen years that it is never really goodbye. You have seen them through the power of the resurrection stone and through many other ways and you know that they are proud of you and have always wanted you to be happy. I know that this is just my opinion but is this not the happiest you have ever been. You are married to Ginny, and now you have a son. It is certainly the happiest I have ever seen you be. Isn't that something you want to share with them?"
"Will you come with me?" Harry croaked and Hermione smiled at him softly.
"Of course I will, Harry." Hermione whispered.
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A warm breeze rustled through the green, ripe leaves on the tall oak trees surrounding Godric's Hollow as they walked along briskly, with Harry slowly pushing James in the tiny buggy in front of them. There were a few people passing by every so often but apart from that the little village located in the south west of England was pleasantly quiet, private and peaceful. They finally approached the gate of the grave yard where Harry's mother and father were buried and with very, very little hesitation Harry, Hermione and James proceeded to enter the grassy, somewhat eerily idyllic cemetery eventually arriving at their destination after much difficulty lifting James' buggy over the flat slabs with many words carved elegantly into them, and the bumpy ground which had been caused by the consistent amount of digging and then re-burying of soil and earth.
It was purely silent apart from the whistling of the wind and the occasional bird tweeting high above them in the large arms of the ancient trees. It was apparent that not much had really changed since the last time Hermione had been there seven nearly eight years ago, apart from the fact that last time she was there a thick layer of frosty snow was no longer covering the oldest of the gravestones. Instead, the sun was beaming down creating a hazy shade of spring. One other thing that was very different was that they had a child with them. Harry's son. Harry had a son. At times she had worried that something like that would never happen.
"I... I do not know what to say." Harry breathed as he and Hermione stood in front of his parents' shared grave.
"Just say whatever feels right. I know it probably does not feel like it, Harry but they can hear you." Hermione spoke quietly and he nodded.
"Mum, Dad, I would like to introduce to you James Sirius Potter – my son. You probably know that already but that is something I wish I had the opportunity to do properly – introduce him to you and for him to have another set of living grandparents. Maybe it only got to me when Ginny and I showed him to Arthur and Molly but I really wanted to have the same experience with you two and I guess that this is probably the closest I will ever get to that. I do not know whether you would mind if I called him James, Dad but I hope you do not because it meant something to both Ginny and I when we were deciding on a name for him. I know that you are watching, and that you always have been, like you told me seven years ago through the resurrection stone and I am glad. Because although you are not here here, you have seen everything and you know everything and now I do not feel like you have missed out on so much." Harry said.
"I am sorry I did not bring James here earlier, I just really did not know where to begin. The only reason I got the courage to come here today was because Hermione persuaded me to and I have no idea had you not died whether you would have had any more children or not but Hermione is the best sister I could have ever imagined. She has always been the sister that I never had, and now she and Ron are having a baby of their own and I can't help but keep thinking that she will be a brilliant mum as well." Harry said and he glanced over at Hermione who smiled softly before they walked over to the bench behind his parent's grave and sat down with Harry holding James carefully.
"I know that Ron and I have sort of already asked but how long had you two been sitting on the name James Sirius?" Hermione asked and Harry thought carefully.
"We started to think about names as soon as we found out that he was a boy. We thought it would be easier that way instead of trying to decide on a name before we knew his gender – then at least we did not have to decide on a girl's name as well. You know the idea to call him James was Ginny's idea?" Harry said and Hermione glared at him surprised.
"Really?" Hermione wondered and Harry nodded
"We were looking through a baby names book that Angelina had given her one day and she just said "Hey, what about James?"" He continued "I was speechless that she had ever considered that and before I could ask her why she said about how although they still are grandparents, they are not necessarily in the conventional sense but that we should honour them in some way because they really did not deserve to die. She said she thought one of the best ways of doing that was fitting James somewhere into his name. Then later on I said how about Sirius as a middle name as he was the next closest thing to a father that I had and it sort of fitted given that they were best friends."
"I can't understand why you did not do this earlier with Ginny, you know, just after he was born like you said you wanted to." Hermione informed him.
"I try not to bring her here too often. There was a point, and there somewhat still is, where in my head, Ginny represented everything that was good in life. Although there was so much to lose if we did not defeat Voldemort, for me she was one of my biggest opportunities of loss. I still feel the same way about her, except that there are many other things that are good too like you and Ron and James, and the Weasley's. This place just brings back memories of a very bad time. We had no idea whether we were going to win the war or not, Ron had left us, and we both wanted to give up. You were the only thing that kept me going through that, because you are my best friend. We have come on the anniversary of their death and I have come alone on Christmas eve, but it does not feel right." Harry said.
"Well, I know this is a bit random, but why don't I come with you then?" Hermione asked as she looked at Harry softly, "On Christmas Eve, I mean. I know that when you come here at that time you do not bring Ginny by choice but nobody likes to be on their own at Christmas, Harry. Ron would understand as well, actually I think he has mentioned it before."
Harry turned and smiled gently before reaching for her hand and squeezing it. "Thank you, Hermione. Things are really working out aren't they?"
"Well, as far as I can see, things can only go up." Hermione beamed
A/N: I am sorry it has been so long since I last updated – 2 weeks to be precise. Homework has kind of gotten on top of me and a lot of things have been going on. I know the second half of this chapter was a bit random but I felt that it needed to be done sooner or later. Anyway thanks and PLEASE REVIEW!