Disclaimer: I don't own South of Nowhere.
Author's Note: This will be a two-part story. The second part will be up in a couple days.
Part 1:
Ashley pulled back slightly, gazed up at Spencer with a soft smile. "I've missed this." Her thumb traced gently over Spencer's hip bone. "It just feels like everything's perfect again, doesn't it?"
She leaned in to kiss Spencer again, but Spencer pulled back sharply. "No."
"No?" Spencer moved further and turned so she was no longer facing Ashley. "What is it? What's wrong?"
Spencer sighed and shook her head slightly. "I was so in love with you, Ash."
"Was?" Panic welled up inside.
Spencer looked back at Ashley suddenly, an angry look of disbelief flashing across her face. "You broke my heart, Ash!"
Ashley couldn't stop the slight flinch at the bitter tone. She averted her eyes, unable to meet Spencer's gaze.
"When you and Aiden were together at-"
"No." Suddenly, her discomfort meant nothing to her. Ashley had to correct this misunderstanding.
"at the prom-"
"No, no! Nothing happened between me and Aiden. I told you that." She had to make Spencer see. Aiden was a friend, but Spencer was the only one she had wanted ever since her little bitchfest at the lockers.
Spencer just stared at her for a long moment. "Look, this doesn't even matter now. I mean, when you were in Europe, you didn't even call me back - for weeks."
"I know," Ashley spoke the words so softly that she couldn't even be sure Spencer had heard them.
"It was like- Like out of sight, out of mind."
"No." The clear hurt in Spencer's voice pulled at Ashley. "No, god, that's not even what it was." She had to fix this - somehow. Ashley knew that she had made so many mistakes - especially over the summer - only, she had no clue where to even begin.
Spencer stood quickly, needing to put some space between herself and Ashley. "My brother died, and..."
Ashley stood quickly, the panic nearly overwhelming her as she followed Spencer.
Spencer turned back to her. "And you just left."
"I know. I was stupid. I told you that, okay. I- I don't do death well. You know that." She took a breath and tried to calm herself a bit. "I swear, that every night I was away, it was great because you were in my dreams; but every morning I woke up it sucked because you wouldn't be there. I know I sound cliché, but it's true."
Spencer shook her head gently and looked away. "I hate this," she said quietly.
"I love you." Spencer still wouldn't meet her gaze. "Spencer, I love you." Ashley glanced down. She could practically feel Spencer pulling away from her, and she had no idea how to stop it. She didn't notice it right away, but when she finally paid attention to what she was seeing, she couldn't help staring at the two black lines. The lines were gently curved, coming together to meet at a point nearly an inch above the waistband of Spencer's skirt.
"It's not enough." Spencer looked up, shaking her head. "I just can't be-" Spencer stopped abruptly when she realized what Ashley was staring at.
Ashley pulled her gaze away from the tattoo just in time to see Spencer pale noticeably. "Spencer? Are you alright?"
"I'm fine." Spencer tugged her shirt down self-consciously, trying to hide the mark from Ashley. A pointless gesture since she knew Ashley had already noticed it.
"You got a tattoo." Ashley nearly winced at the obviousness of the statement. "When did you do that?" Paula must not know. She would've freaked out, and Spencer would likely be grounded for the rest of her life.
That must have been the wrong question to ask, since Spencer met her eyes almost defiantly before she settled into a mask of indifference. "A bit before prom," she shrugged as if it was no big deal.
It clearly was though. Spencer was obviously angry, possibly resentful about it. She had gotten it before prom though, so, it couldn't have been something she got in memory of Clay. She was starting to get that horrible sinking feeling again.
"So, um, I'm thinking about getting a little tattoo on the inside of my wrist - a script 'S'."
Spencer looked up at her, a huge grin on her face. "Shut up! You're crazy." The smile said that she thought otherwise. "Alright," Spencer stood on the bed, almost - but not quite - giving Ashley a nice view of what was under her skirt. "I want one too - an 'A'."
Ashley smirked up at her. "Where?"
Spencer's smile became a bit too innocent as she slowly dragged down the waistband of her skirt. She stopped right by her hipbone, "Right here."
Ashley let out an overly dramatic gasp, "Spencer!"
"What?" Spencer's tone may have been innocent, but the look on her face was anything but.
"Tease," Ashley muttered, causing another laugh from Spencer as she pulled the blonde down on top of her - kissing her only partly to silence her.
"An 'A'," Ashley said softly. Her eyes sought out Spencer's for confirmation of her thoughts. The panic-stricken look on the other girl's face told her she was right.
It took Ashley a few moments to realize she was in her driveway. The whole drive home had passed in a blur. She sighed and rested her forehead against the steering wheel for a minute, trying to collect her thoughts.
Finally, she cut the engine and climbed out of the car. As she started down the pathway, she heard voices. Kyla. Aiden. Another sigh escaped her lips. He was the last person she wanted to see now.
"Shut up! It doesn't say that."
"Whatever, you're being boring. Think you could tell Ashley I was looking for her."
"Yes, I can, and I will... butthead."
"Well, thanks, butthead."
Ashley stepped around the corner. "What are you doing here?" Kyla quickly turned back to her book, trying to stay out of it.
He shrugged. "I was looking for you. I called your cell, but it went straight to voicemail."
"Yeah, I was with Spencer. I think she might have broken up with me."
Kyla glanced up curiously from her book at that. School just started; what could she possibly be studying already?
"I'm sorry," Aiden offered.
Ashley shot him a look. "No, you're not."
"Fine. I'm not. The reason I'm not-"
"You need to leave."
"What? Why?"
Ashley sighed. "Because I can't be around you at the moment."
"Because of Spencer?"
"No, because of you! I'm not in love with you, Aiden. You keep trying to push me into something that I don't- that I can't feel for you, and I don't need that now."
He just stared at her for a moment, jaw set tightly. "Fine."
To be continued...