A/N: Began: 3/29/13 End: 3/30/13

Doctor Who is ALMOST FREAKING HERE. I am so excited! In terms of Doctors, I love 10 best, but Matt Smith is beautiful. I just hope the companion doesn't become a love interest. I want another Donna-like companion. No romance, just really cool and awesome friend buddies. Lots of people hate me for this but really do you WANT to see the Doctor snog every freaking girl in London? It's a bit tiring.

All things in italic type face are lyrics to a song called Iron Man by the band Nico Vega. Give them a listen. They're pretty legit.

More related A/N later

"I wish that I could keep you happy, I wish that I could keep you young."

Remus Lupin stared across from Sirius Black, his eyes cold flat. The bags under his eyes were more defined, as he squinted at the man opposite him. The now-escaped prisoner shifted under the harsh glare of Remus, swallowing. With a mechanical movement, Remus reached across the table, holding out the palm of his hand. Sirius grasped it, the hand was hardened with callouses and scars and relative age.

"He isn't James." Remus said. Sirius nodded. "You must understand that no matter how hard you try to make him James, he won't just wake up and become his father."

"He looks so much like him; he's the only one who looks like one of us anymore." Sirius felt the cold hand tighten.

"We aren't sixteen anymore. Move on." Remus' voice was devoid of any emotion. "Move on and grow up, Sirius."

"Is that what happened to Moony? Did he grow up, or was he always this stiff and distant?" Sirius spat. His face softened a little. "I just…" Remus knew what Sirius felt. Sirius felt like he didn't spend enough time with James growing up, and was thinking Harry was a second chance.

"I know you just want to be happy again… but recreating James is not how you go about it." The hand loosened and Remus stood, walking out. Sirius was left sobbing into his hands.

Remus stayed outside the door of the room, hearing the sounds of sobbing and the occasional "You were human enough."

He wondered why that phrase. That was the phrase Sirius recited that one month that Remus was in an odd state of apathy and self-loathing. Now that Sirius was going through the same thing, perhaps Sirius thought the words would give him the same comfort.

"Please just be happy…" Remus forgot how to help Sirius. He didn't know what to do to fix this, because he felt the same way. Fourth year was the year they really forgot about who James was, because they were too obsessed with each other.

OoOoOo

"You are relentless in the way that you love me, and I'm afraid of the thoughts that you are making."

James Potter was going to take Lily Evans out on a date. It was official. He was going to go on his first official with the most beautiful girl in Hogwarts. As he sat in his usual throne in the common rooms, his face beamed in pride as he broke the news to the rest of the marauders.

"You aren't the only happy ones, Padfoot and Moony!" he proclaimed. In past chapters, I hope you readers were aware that James was not the happiest over the romance sparked between the rebel and the werewolf. But the king finally had his day, as Lily Evans accepted his invitation to Hogsmeade for a romantic lunch for two. On the five hundred and sixty-fifth time he ever asked Lily out on a date, she finally said yes. It was a good day for the king. If only the rebel were as happy as he.

"Fantastic." Sirius muttered, reading What to Expect when Expecting a Werewolf Attack.

"Lovely." Remus said, he was reading The Dangers of Newly Transformed Lycanthropes. "You tried so hard and you finally got her, good on ya, James!" Remus seems especially pep, unlike his boyfriend.

"Why thank you, Remus. I'm still amazing I finally got Lily… how did I get Lily, right?"

"Yes, isn't it great? Now quiet, both of you. Trying to read." Sirius glared at the pages in front of him.

"Oh lighten up a little, Padfoot! Prongs picked up a lady friend now." Remus grinned and nudged Sirius. "We should go find Lily and celebrate."

"Like I would ever celebrate with Lily Evans." Sirius kept his eyes on his book. This was kind of a put off for Remus.

"Well if you're going to be like that…" Remus looked suddenly sad.

James looked at them both. "Look at you, the both of you! Four years and already an old married couple. Wait… three or four? We were in third year the first date, sixth year now. Huh, it's only been three years? Well that's even worse, three years and you're both an old married couple!"

"I'm not legally allowed to marry Sirius according to muggle laws, of course according to muggle laws; their code was set up for humans. Seeing as I'm not human…"

"Oh here we go again!" Sirius slammed his book shut and dropped it. "James, does Remus not have human skin, hair and facial features?"

"He… he has all three traits." James felt as though this wasn't an argument he wanted to get into.

"What happens once a month for me, James? Do say it quietly; don't want the secret getting out." Remus closed his own book sitting up in his chair.

"You turn into a werewolf." James whispered. He spoke a little louder. "But considering that once a month we all turn into…"

"Animals, correct James. Which brings me to my next point here; if you aren't human because you can turn into a wolf, I'm not human because I can turn into a dog." Sirius crossed his arms, feeling he proved his point.

"You idiot, that's magic. I literally have wolf DNA in my body, it's not just a magical thing; it's a science thing." Remus held out his arm and pushed back is jumper and shirt, revealing his bare arm. "See my arm? All the cells on this arm are part wolf. You on the other hand, you are 100% human, with magical abilities."

"Yes, part wolf, but guess what? You're also part human." Sirius tilted his head back, grabbing the sides of his head.

"But not full human." Remus said.

"Human-freaking-enough!" Sirius got up. "I am no longer talking to you until you realize that I could not give less of a damn about your condition, god dammit!" he stormed through the portrait hole and out into the hallways. Some Gryffindor students, who only that part of the argument, looked around awkwardly. James huffed.

"You all ruin my fun." He picked at the hem of his pant leg. "I'm going to go out with Lily…"

"I'll just leave." Remus walked up to his room, glaring at the floor the entire way there. He threw open the door to the dorm and sat on his bed. Did Sirius just cut off contact with him? Why couldn't Sirius just accept the fact that Remus was a dangerous part-monster who could and almost killed the rebel? That's what Remus truly believed. Sirius was hanging onto a fantasy. James came into the dorm and looked at Remus.

"Are you okay, Moony?"

Remus grinned. "Perfect!"

OoOoOo

"I wish I could tell you something, but I'm a hostage of my pride. I'll take all the heat you're packing."

"My date with Lily went amazing. She said she will consider a second one." James puffed his chest in pride. "I kissed her on the cheek and she didn't punch me."

The four boys were in transfiguration. Each one of them was busy trying to turn a chicken into a goose.

"So glad she was finally able to put her pride on the shelf about this." Remus said. His chicken had mallard colors, but not much else duck related. He was happy again. Today was going to be a good day and he was very much happy about that.

"Unlike someone," Sirius said, flicking his wand too hard and accidently turning his into a peacock.

"I thought you weren't talking to me." Remus snapped, good feelings were suddenly all gone. James sighed. Peter looked about the room, harboring a secret of his own. He had been talking to Reg about the dark lord.

"A lot of people think that degrading yourself is a selfless act." Sirius went on, pretending he didn't hear Remus. "In actuality, excessive pride comes in plenty of forms. You can either build yourself up to be a god, or put yourself down as an animal. I find it simpler to just consider a good, a bad, and an ugly side, and embrace all three. Constantly focusing on one particularly nasty side of you is just… annoying."

"Did you stay up all night learning those words, Sirius?" Remus flicked his wand and his chicken grew a cat tail.

"Have you ever once considered that people don't instantly see you as a giant bloodthirsty wolf, Remus?"

"I'm dating Lily Evans…" James whispered.

"Have you ever once considered the fact that I have my own beliefs on werewolves, Sirius?"

"I'm dating Lily Evans…" James repeated.

"Have you ever once considered that I think your beliefs are so terribly wrong in every way and you should change them, Remus?"

"Lily Evans… I'm dating her." James looked over at the two.

"Have you ever once considered that you don't own me and you can't tell me what to think, no matter how wrong you think I am, Sirius?"

"I'M DATING LILY EVANS!" James screamed. The entire class, including Remus and Sirius, turned over to look at James. The Lily Evans herself turned a dark shade of red. The class laughed and the werewolf and the rebel were not amused.

"We're all very happy for you, Mr. Potter. Perhaps you should focus on your chicken now, though." Professor McGonagall gave a tight lipped smile in spite of herself. "Five points from Gryffindor for shouting in class."

Lily gave James a dirty look and whipped her head forward, going back to her work. James looked coughed a little and began in a much quieter voice.

"Now that I have your attention, the two of you have been fighting about this rather boring topic for far too long. Maybe it's time both of you put the good ol' pride on the shelf and decide 'hey! We will never freaking agree!" and this way, I will be happier!"

"This isn't about you, James!" Sirius turned his peacock into a tea cup.

"Stay out of this one!" Remus nearly broke his wand turning his chicken-cat into quill.

By the end of class, Remus stormed out of the classroom. He couldn't let James be happy, he couldn't let anyone be happy. Remus was not happy right now, and as far as he was concerned, no one deserved to be. His thoughts constantly brought him down. They were playing over and over like a broken record ever since that night on the astronomy tower. Remus was not a human. He was a monster. He was a werewolf. Funny thing was, there were moments when Remus could forget that he was a monster. There were times when he could just be Remus. Sirius growled, following after him.

"Please forgive me for the distance, but I'm an Iron Man."

Remus marched into the dorm room, feeling a sense of deja vu. This time, Sirius followed him in.

"I refuse to let you think you can degrade yourself." He began. "And before you even start with me, Remus Ja—." Sirius was cut off by Remus' lips.

"Just… shut up for two seconds, dammit!" Remus pulled away, he began to walk away. He didn't want any more bad feelings. He was done feeling bad feelings.

"Just as long as you do to, bastard." Sirius pulled him back.

"I'm a monster." Remus' voice broke a little. They were creeping back into his mind. He was a monster, he was a werewolf, he wasn't human

"You're human enough." Sirius kissed him, and soon they were slipping off their sweaters. Soon they were undoing each other's buttons. Soon they were slipping off their shoes. Soon they were locking the door. Soon they were on Sirius' bed.

OoOoOo

"I wish that I could know the difference between your smiles and your frowns. Now I'm buried in the armor, cuz I'm an Iron Man."

"…So that's what that is." Remus whispered. He was still yet to catch up with the rest of his body, which lay tangled in Sirius' Black's sheets in a Hogwarts dorm room, next to Sirius Black and stark naked.

"That was…" Sirius stared at the ceiling, in just as much shock as Remus. "That was angry sex… our first sex is angry sex…"

"'Our first sex', Sirius? You are the worst speaker ever." Remus grinned and looked over at Sirius. "Our first sexual encounter was angry."

"I think I like angry sex." Sirius scooted closer to Remus, and Remus rested his head on the other boy's chest.

"Are we the unhealthy couple who just had angry sex?"

"Yes."

"Fuck."

Sirius hummed and wrapped an arm around Remus, hand resting on his bum, because Sirius was still feeling quite cheeky. "That's what we just did."

"I know that," Remus felt his hand and his body went stiff. "But it was angry."

"Well… are you angry anymore?" Sirius moved his fingers through Remus's hair. "Because if you still are I am more than happy to-."

"I'm not angry anymore…" Remus said quietly. "Hold on, I was angry. Then I got in your bed and now I'm not angry. Did we make love or… or anger? I'm so confused!"

"You know, most people would probably say 'thanks for the sex, Sirius' but you question whether to call it love or anger. There are reasons why you scare me sometimes, Moony."

"I'm sorry! I did the whole… after sex thing wrong. Shit… Thank you for the sex, Sirius. There."

"You're hopeless."

"I'm no longer considered a virgin, I believe. Should I tell anyone? Maybe my parents should know or…" Remus seemed suddenly confused, as if he finally caught up with his body

"Never tell your parents anything about this," Sirius shook his head Remus frowned, looking at Sirius bare chest. Sirius could see he was still kind of juvenile when it came to this. "You should smile more… I forgot what it looks like."

A/N: Bit about this chapter: one can safely assume that Remus is actually going through a bit of manic depression, otherwise known as bipolar disorder. Many celebrities have made headlines because of this disease, but very few really understand it. The basics of it are when a person has extreme mood swings, usually sudden happiness followed by sudden anger or sadness. Anything can set him off to suddenly go from chipper to melancholy. Sometimes it's what a person says; he lets that consume his mind. Other times it can just be a thought that's a product of his own mind and delusions. Whatever the cause of the sudden mood swing, it can last anywhere from a few minutes to hours. It also can lead him to do rash things.

There could be a number of reasons why he's going through a bipolar spell. He could be feeling insecure about his life. It's been known he is fairly uncertain about being about to keep Sirius. He also hates himself for being a werewolf. This could be the stem of his delusion that he shouldn't be considered human. Bipolar disorder can stem from insecurities, regrets, worries, anything.

If you or someone you love is going through this, I highly suggest seeking mental help of calling a friendly hotline for crises. It's a serious disease that when left untreated, can lead to suicidal thoughts and tendencies.