At Cora's insistence, Charles agreed to rest in the Blue Room at the Abbey. She felt he was too exhausted to walk to the attics to his old room. She had arranged for one of the housemaids to bring him a tray. "Now Carson, you must promise me you will eat something and you will try to rest for awhile. I will come and get you if there is any change. You have my word. You'll find fresh clothes in the wardrobe. I had Bates fetch them for you."
"Thank you Milady." His throat was sore from dryness and his voice hoarse when he spoke.
He is truly grateful for the care he was being shown, albeit it caused him a great deal of stress to break code and be living and acting like a guest in this grand house that had provided his livelihood for more than 30 years.
She left him and Carson stood at the window, staring toward the town where his love was. He couldn't remember a time in his life he was more exhausted or scared.
Charles changed out of the clothes that he had been in since yesterday morning. He stared at the waistcoat, the blood stain. His eyes filled with tears and he held it against him. As morbid as it seemed, it is her and it's the only thing he has at this very moment to feel close to her. He didn't eat, he couldn't. He did drink some tea and laid down in the clean shirt and trousers. It wasn't long before he drifted to sleep and his mind filled with dreams of Elsie, her swollen belly, a tiny baby in her arms. Her face was radiant with joy. She laughed carefree and kissed him and then there were many children around him. He was young and his shoulders were strong and his hair jet black. She was lovely and beautiful; her hair was long and soft curls followed the shape of her face. He dreamed of her body, her breasts full and her nipples pink and hard. His mouth was on her and they made love and he could hear her whispering his name….except it wasn't what she called him…."
"Carson? Carson?" Lady Mary shook him gently and he jarred awake.
"What? Wh….is she okay? How's the baby?" He came to and for a moment looked perplexed at Mary. "I'm sorry Milady...I was...dreaming..."
Mary felt sad for this man she held dear; she had never seen him so low. She didn't question aloud what his dream meant but quickly totaled that he was exhausted. Her heart went out to him. "Carson? Mrs. Hughes is awake and asking for you." She placed a gentle hand on his arm. "She's awake…."
He closed his eyes and looked around to get his bearings. "Yes…yes..of course. Thank you lady Mary." He quickly dressed in his clean waistcoat and Mary gladly helped him with his tie and his jacket. "If you ever need a job, milady, I'll gladly write you a reference." He gave her that fatherly look that she had seen since she was a tiny girl, it made her smile.
"I shall keep that in mind Carson. The car is out front, waiting for you."
"Thank you milady."
Elsie had drifted back to sleep when he arrived and Charles' heart sank. He gave her time and it wasn't long before those lashes fluttered to life. He didn't speak but moved his chair as close to the bed as possible.
Her voice was barely audible. "Charles?" she whispered.
"I'm here love." That velvet voice spoke soft and low, close to her ear. "I'm right here."
She took his hand, her eye lids were heavy and her lips were dry. "Can I have some water?"
Charles got her everything she asked for; a glass of water, another blanket and a kiss. He smiled when his lips touched hers. It was hope that his Elsie was coming back to him.
What happened?" She finally asks.
"You gave us a scare love." He tried to make light of it and held her hand in his.
Her expression was pained. "I can't remember...I was in my sitting room...and..." she struggled to recall and her eyes brimmed with tears. "Tell me..."
"Shhh...it's okay baby. You don't have to remember right now. Just concentrate on resting. We can talk all about it later." He encouraged her to rest and not get upset.
"I want to know Charles. Please tell me."
He sucked in a deep breath and relented. "You...collapsed at the Abbey. You...uh...had a hemorrhage and lost a lot of blood." He paused.
"A hemorrhage?" She looks confused.
"Yes. You're okay now though and that is what is important." He brought her hand up to kiss the back of it.
She was struggling to keep her eyes open. "Why...? What caused it?"
Before he could answer she was asleep again and he was so grateful. Dr. Clarkson came in to check on her. "Doctor, I don't want her to know about the...pregnancy...not yet. I will tell her when the time is right. And I certainly don't want anyone at Downton to know." he whispered.
"Of course Mr. Carson. I understand."
The hours turned into days and Elsie continued to regain her strength. She had learned that she had a uterine hemorrhage, and they didn't know exactly why yet. She had grown anxious and her mood was depressive. She cried all the time and had difficulty expressing herself. She felt a sense of loss but she could not pinpoint what.
Dr. Clarkson entered her room holding a large envelope. "Mr Carson...Mrs. Carson? I have some news for you."
Carson had forgotten to tell Elsie the doctor had asked them to rush the results of her biopsy. His heart started pounding and his hands burst with perspiration. He moved his chair where he could see Dr. Clarkson yet be close to her.
"This is the biopsy report we sent to London several weeks ago. I have the results." He pulled the paper from the large envelope.
Elsie's mouth grew dry and she looked at Charles with fear. He took her hand and and prayed.
TBC...(teehee...i love ya'll!)