SM OWNS TWILIGHT.

Here's a little bit of Edward. He kept yapping in my ear and i know some of you wanted to hear from him. But this is all he had to say...

Mistakes and inconsistencies are all my fault! sorry.

I'm a real piece of work. I don't know how I keep getting myself in the stupidest, most fucking idiotic situations. All I ever wanted was my Bella.

And there I go fucking leaving her…and pregnant no less! For reasons that are just so juvenile and…pathetic. Yes, I found what I wanted, but no, I was never happy all that time without her.

Did I find pussy to take my mind off the real world and the girl I left behind? Yes. But they didn't t mean shit to me! I swear on everything that I love including my baby girl Sophia that they didn't mean anything to me.

I didn't expect to come back at all…but fate had other ideas. I didn't know if Bella had moved on, but I was willing to make the move and maybe just be friends with her. She's the most honest and caring person I have ever known and I wanted that back in my life. I never denied being a selfish prick. I really wish she would have pounded my ass to the ground for being an asshole to her.

And fuck…she gave me the most beautiful little person in my fucked up world. Sophia.

I don't deserve her, I don't deserve her love, but here I am. She loves me even though she says she hates me. Bella had to make my stupid ass understand that she doesn't really mean it.

Because the knife isn't done twisting in my chest, Bella says she still wants me. Fuck, I want her too. But I see how much I fucked her up. She's almost desperate to leave it all behind her. She wants to move on and she wants me still.

I know she hasn't forgiven me. I can see the hurt in her eyes and she's desperately trying to find the answers in me. I don't have the answers.

I want to make it right, though. I want to take that pain away.

I can't help but being close to her and wanting to just touch her soft skin. Sometimes she lets me…other times she just gives me a warning look.

Focus on Sophia. That's what we're supposed to do—or were doing, until that day in her kitchen when she demanded answers.

I saw the real Bella coming through—stubborn and hot. She gets what she wants and that day she wanted answers and she wanted me.

How could I deny her?

I finally saw the bright light at the end of the tunnel. I was getting my family back. My Bella. She wanted us to work and I was more than willing to try. Fuck yes, I was.

Remember I'm the motherfucking king of bad decisions? Or bad luck. Whatever.

Two days…fuck! Two days after I promise to be with her, promise to be truthful, promise to stay and never run from her again…I get a call.

Lauren. The chick I met at the body shop when she brought her car in.

We fucked a few times…she got clingy so I let her go. She's the last girl I was with before I made my decision to move back.

She says she's pregnant. I don't believe her but I have to make sure.

I'm so ashamed that I stay away from Bella. I know this is going to break her heart but I won't say anything until I know for sure. I know it probably looks like I'm backing out and I don't want to be with her—it's far from the truth.

I fucking love this girl so hard. I'm trying to figure out how not to ruin my chances again. It's either, I tell her about what's going on and she leaves my ass or I distance myself for a bit, keeping her with me, until I figure something out. Obviously I took the selfish road.

I can't take any time off for a while so I'm just waiting it out until I get a chance to go back to Texas and straighten my shit out.

Bella doesn't deserve all of my bullshit, but I'm too fucking selfish to let her go.

Like if we didn't hate him enough! it is what it is.