Disclaimer: I own nothing. Trust me, if I did, Draco and Hermione would be together, not Ron. Siriusly, what does she see in him? If you read this, please answer that question.
A\N: Hey guys. I just adopted this Dramione fic, so I may not be able to update as much. If you're interested in it, look on my profile for it. It's called To win her heart.
Harry sat down, ready for more torture….I mean fun. Yes, fun.
RON: Harry, you got this tournament in bag.
HARRY: I don't know man, Cedric Diggory is kinda awesome- NOT He sucks!
"Harry," Cho cried,"how could you say that?!"
"It's not me!"
I'm totally gonna win this, its in the bag! (Ron and Harry Hi-5)
"What's the 'bag'?" Draco asked.
"It's an American muggle expression," Hermione explained,"it means something is really easy(A/N: I have no idea if that's what it really means, and I'm American!) Draco nodded, seeming to understand.
HERMIONE: I don't know about this Harry.
RON: Oh my god Hermione, shut up! (Mouth full of food) Why do you have to rain on everybodys parade?
"I do not!" Hermione argued.
"Ugh- Midnight duel!-" Harry coughed.
"-Firebolt-" Ron coughed.
"-Triwizard tournament-" Harry coughed. Hermione huffed.
HERMIONE: Because Ron, this is dangerous.
HARRY: Dangerous? Oh come on Hermione how dangerous could it be? Especially for me?
HERMIONE: Wh-Your not invincible Harry, somebody died in this tournament.
HARRY: I'm the Boy-That-Lived not Died. God! Whats the worst that could happen?
"You could die," Draco said. He was ignored by Harry, who was laughing at something.
"Harry," Ginny said,"what's so funny?"
Harry stopped laughing. "Oh," he said,"that just reminded me of this weird joke Fred and George told me once. It was something like 'I'm not afraid of Death. What's the worst it can do? Kill me." Harry went back to laughing, while everyone looked at him like he was crazy.
HERMIONE: And I don't know
"Hermione doesn't know something," Ron yelled, shocked, "this is the end!"
"Shut up," Hermione said, throwing one of her dad's dentist books at the crazy red-head. Maybe it would give him smartness. Probably not, but you can't blame a girl for trying.
about that Quirrel character.
"Oh," Ron nodded,"that makes more sense."
You know, first he reserects a horrible ancient tournament, then- then he bumps into you and your scar starts to hurt,
"Well," Harry said," in his defense, my scars hurting all the time now a days."
and you have got to admit that there is something really funky about the back of his head.
"I have not said the terrible vocabulary word in my entire life," Hermione glared at the screen, causing everyone to inch away from her…slowly.
HARRY: Come on think about it. Profesor Quirrel is a Profesor and who hires the profesors?
HARRY+RON: Dumbledore!
HARRY: Who is the smartest, most awesomest, most practical (RON: Beautiful) wizard, beautiful wizard in the whole world.
"Thank you Mister Potter and Mister Weasley," Dumbledore smiled at the young students. Well, compared to him, young. I wonder how old Dumbledore truly is.
Why would he possibly hire somebody who is trying to hurt me?
HERMIONE: Well, err what about Snape?
"What about me?" Snape snapped.
"Nothing," Hermione said," it's just during our first year…it kind of seemed like you were trying to steal the stone, not Quirrel." Snape's scowl lightened once he heard her explanation. He wasn't exactly cut and cuddly.
HARRY: Yeah what about him?
"You and Snape think alike!" the youngest Weasely boy said to his best friend.
"Mister Weasley," Snape yelled,"never say anything like that ever again. Ten points from Gryffindor."
"Sir," Hermione squeak,"it's still summer break."
"Then ten points from Gryffindor when you return!"
HERMIONE: He's hated you for years Harry, and he's hated your parents
Snape looked down. He could never hate Lily, but how could those muggles know who he hated and who he loved. It wasn't like they had a book filed with the adventure of people at Hogwarts. That would be absurd!
too everyone knows that! And he just so happens to pick your name out of the House Cup out of hundreds if not 5 possible Gryffindors.
Everyone giggled at the huge selection of Gryffindors they had.
HARRY: Yeah what a coincidence?
"No it isn't," Ginny said.
HERMIONE: No
"Yay," Ginny said,"we think alike." The two girls then started grinning like the Cherstery(sp) cat.
HARRY: We lucked out!
Everyone threw a pillow at the scar-headed boy.
HERMIONE: No Harry I don't think it is a coincidence. When you defeated Voldemort, you made a lot of enemies,
"To true," Harry said, then received many sad looks.
(HARRY: Okay) Ones you might not even know about.
HARRY: Alright, so let me get this straight. You think that this tournament is just one big ploy to try to kill me?
"Yep,"all the girls said. Wow, those three are smart, aren't they.
RON: God, stupid!
"What did you call me?" Hermione asked.
"Nothing," Ron squeaked, inching away from Hermione.
HERMIONE: Umm I don't know, maybe! Anyway, I-I just think its dangerous and I don't think you should do it.
HARRY: Alright Hermione, if it means that much to you. I'll drop out.
"What the hell!" Hermione said,"That was all it took?"
"Hermione Granger, you just cursed," Ron and Harry yelled.
"Yeah, get over it, just because you don't see this side of me, doesn't mean it doesn't exist," Hermione shot back, causing the two boys to gulp. No matter how good of friends they were, Hermione was bloody scary sometimes.
HERMIONE: Oh, Thank you Harry! (hugs him)
RON: Wait wait wait wait -WHAT? The HOUSE CUP? What about all the eternal glory you'd win? I mean come on!
"Ron," Harry looked at his best mate,"I technically already have eternal glory."
"True, true."
HARRY: Hey hey, eternal glory? Already got that. Besides Neville will make a great champion.
Everyone cracked a smile at that mental image. Then, they frowned. If Neville took on the Hungarian Horntail, he would be burned alive in five seconds flat.
RON: NO no no no! I do not want Shlongbottom to be my champion.
"Really Ronald," Hermione said to her friend,"you should apologize to Neville next time you see him."
HERMIONE: Harry, all you have to do- Oh look theres Dumbledore (enter Dumbledore) Why don't you go talk to him and tell him that your dropping out?
HARRY: Uhh, listen Hermione. Me and Dumbledore are really really super super tight
"We are?" the two asked at the same time.
and I don't want him to think that I'm being lazy or anything, so can you tell- why don't you tell him? Tell him I want to work on school or something. Alright? Hey, you got this (pokes her nose)
"If you ever so much of thinking of doing that-"
"Yeah, I know Hermione, you'll slap me."
"No, I'll hex your balls off." This caused every boy, no matter the age, to cover that spot. This also caused Ginny and Cho to give Hermione high-5s.
Your the best, (HERMIONE: alright) You got this.
HERMIONE: Okay. Dumbledore?
DUMBLEDORE: Yes Granger?
HERMIONE: Err, I need to talk to you about the, um, House Cup tournament. First of all I think its an awful idea.
"I wonder why awful is spelled like that," Draco commented out of the blue.
"What?" Ginny asked.
"I guess it is confusing," Hermione agreed," 'awe' means to be inspired, and the suffix 'full' means full of, so awful should mean full of inspiration, not something terrible." The boys looked at the two wondering what brought up the strange conversation. The girls looked at the two thinking that they'd be a great couple.
But second of all, I-I don't think that Harry Potter should compete.
DUMBLEDORE: Granger, why do you always gotta be a good 'ol stick in the mud huh?
"Yeah, 'Mione,"Ron yelled,"why are you such a stick in the mud?"
"Ask me that again, and I'll break both of your legs. Okay?"
"Okay."
Pray tell why Harry Potter shouldn't compete?
HERMIONE: Uhh, Well because he uhh, wants to study.
"Hermione," Cho said kindly,"except for you and us Ravenclaws, no one studies at Hogwarts."
DUMBLEDORE: Granger, nobody studdies here at Hogwarts except for you.
"Cho," Ron said,"you think like Dumbledore."
"There are worse things to think like."
HERMIONE: Well, uhh okay. He wants to focus on the OWLs.
"We just took them," Harry laughed,"why should I focus on them."
"Obviously they aren't in they're fifth year."
"Yeah," Ron said,"and if it's Hermione giving the excuse, then it would make total sense to her to give the excuse in our first year."
"Well," Hermione defended,"there's never right time to study, so I should be able to study when I want. And it isn't our first year, because Harry knows what Hogwarts is. So, that leaves the second, third, and fourth year."
She had all that in one breath, causing everyone to scream,"Breath, lady!"
DUMBLEDORE: Why couldn't Harry have told me this himself? He thinks I'm cool, we're tight.
"We are?"
HERMIONE: Okay, I'm a really bad liar. Okay, I think its a ruse. A set up, and I think that maybe Snape might be trying to kill Harry Potter.
DUMBLEDORE: Severus Snape is one of the kindest, bravest, gentlest, sexiest man I have ever met.
"The mental images," Ginny, Cho, Hermione screamed at the same time. They started hugging themselves and rocking back and forth. Those three poor girls...
Severus Snape is trying to kill Harry Potter about as much as he is trying to kill me.
SNAPE: Oh Profesor Dumbledore, I was just in the kitchen and I decided to make you this delicious sandwich. (Sandwich is a bomb)
"Oh good lord," Hermione muttered.
"What is that?" Draco asked, pointing at the sandwich.
"It's a sandwich," Ron said simply.
"No. The thing between the sandwich."
"That's a bomb," Hermione answered,"it's a device that will explode at a set time. It's like the spell confringo."
"Thanks," Draco smiled. Okay, this is starting to get weird...
DUMBLEDORE: Ohhh, why thank you Severus, you see Granger how thoughtful.
SNAPE: Here you are Preofesor, Bomb apetite- I mean Bone apetite. (Snape runs off stage)
HERMIONE: Umm, is that sandwhich ticking?
DUMBLEDORE: It looks like its licking. Finger-licking good.
"Oh my God," Harry shook his head at the old man.
"Does anyone else want a sandwich now?" Ron asked, which got a lot of yeses.
"I'll make some after the scene is over," Hermione said.
HERMIONE: Profesor, I don't think you should eat that sandwhich.
"Yeah," Cho said,"listen to the girl with the crazy hair." She then got hit by a pillow.
DUMBLEDORE: Why Granger? You gotta listen to Snape more often, you might even get a sandwich out of it. (Hermione grabs sandwhich) Granger what the hell- (Hermione runs off stage with it) Granger! What are you doing?(Explosion hapens) You don gone exploded my sandwhich!
Everyone was laughing as the scene unfolded, but there was one simple thought on everyone's mind. Never let Fred and George see this. They'd do a much better job of hiding the bomb than Snape.
HERMIONE: I'm sorry sir!
DUMBLEDORE: Hey. Even if I did happen to know that Harry Potter was in danger, he would still have to compete. You see that cup?
"Yep," all the boys answered. Yes, even Snape.
HERMIONE: Yes!
DUMBLEDORE: Its Enchanted. Whoevers name comes out of the cup has to compete or the results would be bad..
HERMIONE: What do you mean bad?
DUMBLEDORE: Well, try to imagine your entire life stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
"A total platonic reversal," Hermione gasped,"I guess Harry would have to do it then."
HERMIONE: A total platonic reversal!
Everyone stared at Hermione. "How the hell did you get that right?" Ginny asked.
"Let's just say, I thought Science College books were fun to read."
DUMBLEDORE: Yeah, so you see Harry Potter has to compete. And Hermione if it makes you feel any better, the last person to die in this tournament was a Hufflepuff,
"Not the best thing you could have said," Cho mumbled sadly.
so umm, I'll keep my eyes open, and nothings gonna get past old Dumbledore. Now I gotta go make myself another sandwhich, but I don't know how it will be better than the last one, that one ticked! (Exit Dumbledore)
Everyone rolled their eyes at the old man.
HERMIONE: Because it was a bomb. (walks over to boys)
Cue cuckles.
Harry, I'm so sorry but I think your gonna have to compete in the House Cup tournament. But don't worry, I wont rest until I find out what the first task is.
"And you won't even look at the notes," Hermione mumbled.
"Twenty pages, Hermione," Harry said,"And you have small hand writing. That thing could have counted as a book, I swear." Hermione flicked her friend in the eye after that peaceful conversation.
RON: And I'll sabotage all the other champions so you win by default.
"I should have done that," Ron said mournfully.
"It's okay," Harry said," Fred and George did that for me."
HARRY: Alright! You guys are awesome!
"We know," the red-head and brunette said at the same time.
(Enter Crabbe and Goyle with Goyle carrying Draco)
"What the hell?" Ron said.
DRACO: Well, isn't this touching?
RON: Oh my god just but out Malfoy. (Draco starts rolling all over the floor).
"Oh Merlin," Draco groaned as everyone laughed. Why couldn't his character have some dignity?
DRACO: Father and I have a bet you know. He thinks you wont last five minuets in this tournament. I disagree. I think you wont last five minuets at Pigfarts!
"What's Pigfarts?" Ginny asked.
HARRY: Alright, Malfoy, what- what is Pigfarts?
"Ah," Hermione said," you two think alike. How cute." This caused Harry and Ginny to both blush.
DRACO: Oh never heard of it? Figures, famous Potter doens't even know about Pigfarts.
HARRY: Malfoy, don't act like you don't want to talk about it. Thats like the tenth time you've mentioned it so what is Pigfarts?
"It's the third time, actually," Hermione said.
DRACO: Pigfarts, is only the greatest wizardrying school in th galaxy. Its where I'm being transfered next year.
HERMIONE: Malfoy, I have never heard of that.
DRACO: Thats because Pigfarts…...is on Mars!
"Well that makes perfect sense," Harry said.
"How would someone get to Mars?" Draco asked. That red planet was thousands of miles away.
"Rocket ship," Harry and Hermione said, then turned to each other,"Jinx, double jinx, triple jinx, quadruple jinx." Then, they both started thinking until Harry said," Draw?" and Hermione nodded.
"What's a rocket ship?" Draco asked, ignoring what the two friends had just done.
"It's like a broom," Hermione said,"only bigger, and it's made to go into space, not travel on Earth, or play games." Draco nodded, happy he was starting to get the things the muggles said.
HARRY: Malfoy, you know, we are trying to have a conversation here, so if you would-
DRACO: Oh I'm not even here.
HARRY: Okay so anyway, I was thinking that maybe we could ask Dumbledore about the fist task.
DRACO: Dumbledore? What an old Coot! He's nothing like Rumbleroar.
"Who?" was the general statement.
GOYLE: RUMBLEROAR!
HARRY: Anyways I think-
DRACO: Rumbleroars the Headmaster of Pigfarts. He's a lion, who can talk.
Hermione and Ginny seemed to perk up at that. A talking lion doesn't that sound familiar.
"I want to meet a talking lion," Ron yelled.
"I know where you can find on," Hermione said, and everyone, minus Ginny and Ron, looked at her like she was crazy. "His name is Aslan and he lives in Narnia. You can find him and the lace he lives in, right in that wardrobe." She pointed to a wardrobe that looked exactly like the one in the movie.
"If you'll excuse me and Hermione for a moment, you can meet him Ron," Ginny said , and Hermione and her ran up the stairs.
Ron then went and ran into the wardrobe. The people left were looking at Harry. If Hermione mention that Aslan guy, he was probably a muggle thing. "Oh," Harry said,"there's a book series called the chronicles of narnia, and I think it has a talking lion in it somewhere."
Then, the two girls ran down the stair, with different t-shirts on. Ginny wore a blue shirt that just had a lamp post on it. Hermione was where a tank top that had a lion's face on it. Then, Ron ran out of the wardrobe, looking depressed. Everyone sat down as if nothing had happened.
HARRY: If you don't mind, we are trying to have a conversation here so why don't you- what, your not even eating, get out of here!
DRACO: Well, I can't help it if we can hear everything you say, we are the only ones in here.
HARRY: Malfoy can you just get out of here please?
DRACO: Where am I supposed to go?
HARRY: Uhh, I don't know? Pigfarts?
The teens chuckled lightly at that.
DRACO: Oh ha ha ha, now your just being cute. I can't go to Pigfarts. Its on Mars! You need a rocketship. Have you got a rocketship Potter? I bet you do. You know not all of us inherited enough money to buy out NASA
"NASA?" Draco asked.
"Muggle space thing."
when our parents died.
SMACK. Hermione had, yet again, smacked Draco Malfoy. "Say your sorry," Hermione glared.
"I'm really sorry, Pott- Harry," Draco said. Harry glared at the screen, but then high-5ed Hermione.
"You're forgiven," he said.
(Rolled all over Harry Ron and Hermione) Look, at this, look at this! Rocketship Potter, Starkid Potter! Moonshoes Potter, traversing the galaxy for intergalactic travels to Pigfarts.
Everyone just shook their head at the young wizard.
HARRY: Alright, thats it. This is the most misguided way to try and make me feel jealous.
"Too true," Harry laughed.
I don't care if you make fun of me, but if you bring my parents into this its a whole other
"Or I'll…" Harry thought for a second,"leave you for Hermione." To add to the effect of that statement alone, Hermione gave her best witch's laugh. It was terrifying.
DRACO: Whoa! Not so fast potter (Runs off behind Goyle)Crabbe Goyle! (Runs and hangs upside down on the bottom of a bench)
"Can't my character be normal for a single second?" Draco complained.
Hermione pinched his cheek in a grandmotherish sort of way. "Of course not," she smiled,"then she'd be nothing like you." Draco responded by hitting the back of her head.
HARRY: Oh Sure just back-
GOYLE: BACK OFF NERD!
HARRY: Whoa! Scary, scary!
"Not really," Harry chuckled.
"You should see him when he is angry," Draco said,"Crabbe stole his chocolate frog. He was in the hospital wing for a week."
DRACO: Not so tough now are you Potter? Maybe you should hang out with someone other than that lolly-gagging ginger and his stupid mudblood girlfriend!
"First of all," Hermione said,"never call me that again or you will regret it. A lot. Second of all, I'm not Ron's girlfriend. He's practically my brother. My annoying, lazy, occasionally stupid, fake brother."
"Yeah," Ron agreed, then thought about what she said,"Wait! That was mean, Hermione."
HERMIONE: Oh, That is IT Malfoy! Jelly-legs jinx! (Points wand at Crabbe and Goyle)
"How creative," Snape rolled his eyes.
"Not very," Ron smiled at the professor.
DRACO: Oh Come on!
GOYLE: Hey no fair! My legs are jelly
"You don't say," Draco exclaimed.
(Hermione walks over to Draco who is still hanging upside down)
HERMIONE: (Grabs his tie and pulls him up) Take it back Malfoy!
DRACO: Take what back?
HERMIONE: Take back what you said about your stupid made up space school!
"What if it were real?" Draco asked innocently. Harry smiled, waiting for his friend to hurt the blonde boy.
He was disappointed when Hermione said,"I guess I'd apologize."
RON: Yeah, and all that stuff about Hermione being my girlfriend, thats not even a little bit true.
"Yeah," Ginny said," Hermione has standards."
Ron scrunched up his face,"Meany!"
HERMIONE: And say your sorry for calling me a you-know-what!
"Sorry," Draco said. Hermione just rolled her eyes and patted his head.
DRACO: Alright I'm sorry.
HERMIONE: And you promise never to do it again?
"Promise," Draco said. Hermione blushed.
DRACO: I promise!
HERMIONE: Alright! Now next time we tell you to leave us alone, you better do it. Come on, Harry, Ron, lets get out of here. Besides, you already ate all my lunch.
"Most true statement in this musical so far," Hermione said. At Ron's face, Hermione said,"I mean, Ron stole my food at the end of year feast."
"You weren't eating it!" Ron cried.
"I rest my case."
"HARRY: Wow. Thanks Hermione.
HERMIONE: Yeah. UnJellyfy!
RON: That was like the most bad-ass thing I've ever seen, too bad nobody was here to see it though. It was like an outburst of pent-up agression (Starts to leave) It was like, Arghh! Hermione!
The golden trio laughed. The last time Hermione a pent up aggression, she broke Malfoy's nose.
"Could you attack something other than me when you have pent up aggression?" Draco asked, not wanting another broken nose.
HWermione sighed,"I guess I'll try."
GOYLE: Wow! That sucked royal Hipogriff. We got beat by a girl. Who's a nerd!
"Yeah, because that girl is awesome," Ginny said.
Hermione rolled her eyes at her best friend,"Thanks, Ginny."
DRACO: I didn't mean what I said you know. Pigfarts is real.
"Told you!"
"No," Hermione corrected the ferret," you asked what I'd do if Pigfarts was real. You never said it was real." Draco pouted at the know-it-all.
(starts to touch his nose checking for blood) Am I- Am I bleeding? Goyle?
(Goyle goes on all fours and sniffs Dracos nose)
Everyone laughed. "Please tell me he doesn't actually do that," Cho giggled.
"Of course he doesn't!"
GOYLE: NO!
DRACO: Oh, I thought maybe-maybe just a little bit (still touching his nose and seeing for blood) Well, I've never been pushed down like that by a girl. Maybe, I shouldn't call her a mud-
"You shouldn't have," Harry agreed.
Whatever. (gets up)
GOYLE: I can't believe I couldn't figure out that the counter curse was just unjellyfy.
"Well, I'm not surprised," Hermione stated.
DRACO: Well, I'm not surprised.
"Hermione," Ron looked like he was going to cry," you think like Malfoy."
"So?"
"That's a bad thing!"
"Who said?"
Come on lets go watch, Wizards of Waverley Place. (exit stage)
"What's that?" Draco asked.
"It's a kid's muggle show," Hermione stated,"it's about a family of wizards pretty much. It's I like our world more than theirs, but they have less of a chance of dying, so that might be nice."
"Not might," Ginny joked,"it would definitely be nice."
"Well," Hermione said,"does anyone want a sandwich," everyone raised their hand,"well, I'll make some and you guys can have a bathroom break."
"I'll help," Draco offered, then said at the looks he received,"What? I know how to make a sandwich, and she might need some help. Just trying to be nice."
"Okay, then," Hermione smiled,"let's go."
Please, please review. It helps me get ideas, which would equal faster writing. Also, some Dramione is gonna happen in the next chapter.