Washington entered the Command Center promptly at eight the next morning. She saw the entire contingent of officers present, along with Shannon, who looked sympathetically at her. She was dressed in her best work uniform and boots shined. Normally she would have her beret on, but her head protested when she attempted to place it. She knew Taylor would notice, but she was beyond caring. If he wanted to add an additional penalty for not wearing her complete uniform, who was she to care or complain. She marched to stand before his desk like the previous night and a time so long ago.
"Lieutenant Alicia Washington reporting, Sir."
Nathaniel stood to face her and their eyes met, hers dark and unreadable and his stormy with emotion, but she couldn't tell if it were sorrow or anger. She willed her mind to think this was another day and tried to keep her heart rate under a hundred, but she knew it was racing.
"Lieutenant Washington, as Commander of Terra Nova, it is my duty to measure out a disciplinary action against you for dereliction of duty during the time of war. No officer is allowed to be drunk or inhibited in proximity to a war zone. Your failure to execute and lead the resistance as senior officer, who wasn't injured or impaired during the occupation, is in direct violation of the military code section eight part three of conduct in times of war. As senior officer, and left personally by myself to be in command, you exhibited conduct unbecoming an officer. You are hereby-demoted one rank to second Lieutenant, with demotion of pay and suspended from duty for two weeks. Report for duty in two weeks from tomorrow. Do you have anything to say, Lieutenant?"
"No, Sir," she wasn't ready to apologize and she knew he wanted contriteness for her actions and saw him frown at her answer.
He addressed the officers and Shannon, "During the Lieutenant's suspension, Sheriff Jim Shannon will assume her duties. If you have a requirement, take it to him, dismissed." There was a general milling about as many wanted to comfort Washington, but she was still standing before the Commander's desk and hadn't made any motion to leave, so with reluctance shuffled slowly out, not wanting to miss the next phase, but knew it would be private.
Jim went over to her, "Sorry, Wash, I wasn't in favor of this, just so you know," he spoke quietly, but was sure Taylor overheard as he was still standing in the same spot on the other side of his desk.
Wash ignored him, "Commander, a word."
Taylor looked at Shannon, the last person in the room besides them, "Jim."
Shannon looked around, "Uh, right, I'll be outside," he awkwardly left them alone.
"Wash, I hated to do that," Nathaniel wanted to start the process of healing and restoration of their relationship, but knew now probably wasn't the best timing.
She ignored his attempt at contriteness and voiced her reason for staying, "Sir, you have to approve all housing and I would like one of the new houses in sector J."
He wasn't sure what she wanted to talk to him about, but this surprised him. He pulled up the map of the colony, "Which one?"
She looked at the map and pointed, "That one." She picked out the furthest from the Command Center, the last one around the edge of the civilization and pointed to a nice bungalow with large trees and shrubs partially hiding it from the neighboring homes.
Nathaniel remembered that house and thought whoever got it lucky, and looked at his plexpad. "It was slated to go to a family that never showed so it's yours," he made the notation changing ownership, "just go to Colony Financial and pay or arrange payments."
"Thank you, Sir," Washington turned to leave leaning heavily on her cane as the room was starting to swirl again with the lowering of her blood pressure and decreased heart rate. Combined with the stress of not eating since yesterday morning, and what she just went through made her want to pass out and she didn't want to in front of him.
"Wash," Nathaniel moved to cut her off and saw the strain in her eyes. He put a hand on her shoulder, "I'll be by to check on you," he let her go as she shrugged his hand off.
"Don't bother," she opened the door and departed, leaving him looking at sunlight streaming in and hitting his legs.
Jim was loitering and she went by him without so much as a glance. He looked through the door at Taylor and hurried to catch her as she struggled with the stairs. "Let me help, Wash," he took her arm that held the cane.
"Now is not the time to be in my vicinity. Taylor didn't take my gun so back off, Shannon," she warned so he stopped and watched her descend carefully, and with obvious difficulty. Mustering as much dignity as she could, Wash headed home to wait for the opening of the bank in the morning. Breakfast consisted of another shot of whiskey and she went and lay on her couch hoping the world would leave her alone and that incessant peripheral dizziness she thought she conquered would go away.
Jim hurried back into the Command Center where he found the Commander behind his desk reading more reports and making notes.
Taylor looked up, "Why aren't you home with your family?"
"Did you really have to do that to her?" Jim wanted to deck Taylor, but figured home was a better choice than the jail.
"We are cut off. I will do everything in my power not to let this colony descend into anarchy where people can violate any rule or law they feel. Wash set a bad example and she knows it. I figure it'll take two weeks for her to completely heal and be bored to death. She never takes a vacation and hardly a day off. I'm doing her a favor."
"You don't care that she's angry with you?"
"If I cared about every person I piss off, I wouldn't be Commander. She'll get over it."
"What if she doesn't?" Jim found himself once again in total disagreement with Taylor.
"Where's she going to go?" Taylor sounded sure everything would go back to normal in time.
Jim went home and told his family.
"You can't be serious, after what she did for our family," Elizabeth was furious, "and you didn't tell me last night?"
"I didn't know the details or that I would be given her position," he defended himself.
"Is there anything we can do to help her?" Elizabeth wasn't ready to let it drop and allow Washington be punished without trying to help her. "I'm going to talk to Taylor," she stood up.
"No, don't get involved," Jim cautioned.
"That's one of the dumber things you've said in a long time. We are involved. Part of her punishment is directly due to our family," she stormed off.
She found Taylor talking to his troops near the front gate and stalked up to him, "Commander, a word if you please."
"I don't have time, Mrs. Shannon," he knew what she wanted.
"Fine, we'll talk right here," she gave him one more chance.
He looked at his soldiers, "Carry on." He led Elizabeth to the Command Center and waited for her to speak her mind.
"Ever since my family came here, we've watched you make one dubious decision after another, like Milner and throwing my husband in jail. Through it all, Washington stood by your side and helped with your dirty work. She was very worried about you the time you and my husband took the pheromones to draw the flying reptiles away. I watched you two sharing a dance at the Harvest Festival and thought you two were a couple with the way you moved perfectly together. How can you treat a woman who I'm sure loves you, like trash?" she stopped her tirade and glared, hands on her hips, waiting an answer.
"Dr. Shannon," he drawled, "If I let her get away with insubordination, I'll slowly, person by person lose control of my soldiers. They have to know there are consequences. She knows a little rebuke will go a long way with the others. It's never pleasant while happening, but she's strong," he used a low soothing tone hoping to mollify the irate doctor.
"What can I do to help her?" she knew she wouldn't win with this stubborn man, and like all men hated to admit when he was wrong.
Taylor gave it some thought, "She's moving to the opposite side of the colony and out of the officer's units. She could use some help moving in a couple days. Also, knowing her, I bet she's avoiding the market and needs food. I'd take her some, but she'd probably throw it at me," he smiled at the thought.
"I want to make sure she's taking this as well as you seem to think," Elizabeth left him alone.
As soon as she was out of sight, he dropped the façade and let his worry show. He felt he let his anger and split second decision-making lead to another mistake and this one might not have a happy ending.
Since they moved out of the caves into housing units, he was comforted knowing that his best friend was a few units away in the female section, surrounded by men with units on three sides, keeping their female service members safe. It might be sexist, but keeping her from harm because she was a woman lead him to keeping her here and now she was moving from under his protective shield. It was starting to sink in that he did indeed change their relationship forever and he had doubts she'd return to him, even if he got on his knees and begged. He was starting to feel alone and isolated with nobody to blame but himself.
Washington closed her eyes and let her mind wander to a time many years before, the last time Taylor disciplined her.
It was just before the second pilgrimage. They sat up quarters in the system of caves that ran under what would become the sub level of the colony. Taylor explored some of the tunnels on his three months alone and for safety used a cavern for his home, not sure if he'd ever see another human again.
It was early evening, just after dark and she was on night duty when she heard her name called.
"Washington, come here." She went to the opening of a large cave and saw Boylan beaming at her, "When I retire, I'm going to ask Taylor for this spot and build the best bar in Terra Nova. In fact, I made my first batch of hooch from the local fruits. Take a sip and tell me if it's as good as I think it is," he handed her a glass.
Instead of telling him she'd be back after her shift, she took the glass and took a healthy gulp. It was potent and good.
"This is good. You hit on a money maker this time, Boylan," she raised the glass in a salute and drained it. Handing the empty glass back she turned to leave only to find Taylor standing directly behind her.
"Lieutenant, drinking on duty?" he caught her red-handed.
"I gave it to her, Commander," Boylan came to her defense.
"She outranks you, Boylan, and knows the military rules." He turned his attention back to her, "You're on report, Lieutenant, come with me."
She remembered following the Commander back to his almost finished Command Center and started giggling.
"What's so funny?" he turned and was growling in her ear.
"I'm having trouble walking, Sir. That is one strong brew. I'm woozy," she gripped his arm and giggled again.
"You're drunk and on duty," he couldn't believe it. "Go sleep it off."
When she woke, she had a hangover. "Boylan's going to have to tone that batch down," she mumbled as she struggled up then remembered Taylor and groaned.
Standing in front of him with the officer's watching, she listened to his decree, "You are hereby reduced one rank from Second Lieutenant to First Sergeant. You will be assigned to outpost construction until further notice," he sounded so disappointed in her and she let him down after he personally picked her to be his third in command and promoted her to Lieutenant just under Lieutenant Tate. She'd make sure to never give him pause to doubt his decision or want to see that look of disappointment again.
She was on outpost duty for two years, building and maintaining all of the buildings so she knew them and the areas surrounding them like the back of her hand. On the few trips back to the colony she reported in, being professional with everyone, never letting anyone get close. It was easier that way. Every once in a while, Commander Taylor would arrive at an outpost she was stationed at and talk to her like an old friend and tell her how proud of her he was. She never bought his line of bull. If he really meant what he said, he'd promote her back to Lieutenant and bring her home. She would talk to him as if nothing happened, but never forgot she was outcast and he didn't really want her in his outfit anymore.
He told her what he did to Lucas and asked her to keep it quiet, as he didn't want it spread around. Like whom was she going to tell at outpost five, her latest construction assignment. Then one day a group of soldiers she didn't know showed up and introduced themselves and explained she was ordered back to the colony. They still didn't have direct communication with the colony so they brought a recorded message from Taylor telling her she was instructed to return to the colony. Packing her simple effects, she made the long drive in just under ten hours, arriving at supper time.
Looking around, she was amazed at the changes since her last trip here nine months before. Many new houses had been constructed and children were running around. She hadn't seen kids in so long; she stopped and stared at them.
Turning, she saw Casey in a wheelchair grinning up at her, "I heard a rumor that you got tired of your feet, Casey," she was happy to see a familiar face.
"I got tired of washing and smelling the stinkin things," he returned her joke, then turned serious, "I was worried about you, Wash. You were out there too long," Casey rolled along as she walked towards the Command Center that was almost finished when she was ordered to leave.
"I have to check in with Taylor, he up their?" she made a motion.
"I believe so," he watched from the bottom of the steps as she ascended.
He was sitting at his desk made from the giant skull she found in one of her exploring trips and told him about. He looked up and smiled, "Wash, welcome home."
"Am I not being sent back out, Sir?" she still didn't believe anything he had to say and he would have to work hard to earn her trust again.
"Not only are you home, I'm restoring your rank to Lieutenant as of now," he made a notation on his plexpad. "And am taking you to supper in the market and introducing you to the colonists. We have a terminus for new arrivals now and the fourth pilgrimage will be here in a few weeks and we have a stationary place where hopefully they'll not be scattered all over hell and gone," he jumped up and round his desk, giving her a hug. "You did outstanding work on the outposts and it's been noted in your file," he noticed she never smiled once since her arrival.
"If you say so, Sir."
"I have a new job for you, Wash, and by the way, I really missed you," he put an arm around her shoulders as he guided her from the room and down the steps. She was silent, wondering if she'd ever really fit in again.
He introduced her to several vendors and civilians and new soldiers, telling them she was taking over their training. Several older soldiers came up and welcomed her back. Taylor stayed by her side and they visited until she couldn't hold a yawn back.
"Come, I have quarters for you," he ordered two privates to go to her rover and retrieve her bags. Taking her to nice units that were small, but functional, he showed her around the one she had to this day.
"Take a few days off and get to know the people, explore the colony and relax. I don't want to see you in uniform for at least four days." Order given, he left her alone. She had trouble sleeping the first night with the streetlights shining in her window and the lack of wildlife scratching outside the rock buildings and on the doors in the night. She knew she had to adjust, both to more than two other people at a time, but civilians.
The next morning she wandered through the crowded market listening to people talk. She looked at the food and saw several fruits she found to be edible gracing the tables and was glad the colony finally transitioned away from food from the future. Two women she didn't know were gossiping, "I tell you, the Commander actually flirted with me last night. I was walking home in the dark and he came out of nowhere and offered to escort me. Of course, I wasn't going to refuse an offer from a man who looks like him. I told him I was having him for dinner soon for his gallantry. Once he tastes my cooking, he'll be back for more if you know what I mean," and the women giggled together. Wash was stunned. While she was gone, Taylor was seeing other women, and why wouldn't he. They were just friends and she wasn't sure of that anymore, even though they had a history that went back years and she knew his dead wife. She moved on wishing she hadn't come back.
It took months for her to feel welcome and at home in the growing colony. She did everything Taylor asked of her without complaint, but didn't really make friends. She used to have no trouble opening up, but now found it harder, even with Taylor, whom she admired for his relentless ethics and work habits. He treated her like his best friend and so did Tate and she slowly relaxed in their presence as they included her in all their activities. She was cordial, but distant to everyone else.
Casey noticed the change and asked her about it one day.
"I don't think I'll ever fully trust again," she confided, not knowing Taylor asked him to find out why she was so quiet and withdrawn.
Casey intuitively guessed, "Was it what Taylor did, making you stay away for two years?"
"Yes. In the back of my mind, I'll always be afraid he'll do it again if I so much as step out of line."
"He needs you here. He doesn't have a lot of people he trusts. You're part of his inner circle. He missed you and told me so often."
"Well, if he missed me so much, why didn't he bring me back sooner?" she wasn't ready to use the word home yet.
"All I ever heard was he thought you were the best person for the job. Remember when I was helping you build outpost seven and the slashers attacked." They got off subject telling war stories while younger newer replacements gathered around to hear Casey tell stories. Wash let him take over and slipped away.
A few days later, Taylor approached her, having talked to Casey. "Wash, come walk with me," he made sure she was complying and by his side. "I am friendly with every person in this colony. It's my job….well, I've butted heads with Boylan so much, I've made an exception for him," he admitted. When she didn't say anything, he persisted, "I was worried about you the entire time you were gone from the colony. I'll never send you away for a long time again, just small trips so you don't get stagnant and claustrophobic. Now that we have the outposts finished, I wrote protocol that says nobody stays longer than six weeks per year at any post."
"I read the protocols, Sir," she contemplated where this was going.
"What I'm trying to say, Wash, is I was wrong to do what I did to you and am asking for you to forgive me," that stopped her in her tracks and they turned facing each other.
"I'd be lying if I said it didn't scar or change me forever."
"Why didn't you ever say something to me?" he put his hands on her shoulders.
"I figured it was part of my discipline, Sir," she was candid and forthcoming.
"That was over after a month, but I didn't have anyone to replace your expertise and you were too good at your job so I used you."
"Maybe you should have told me," she didn't know whether to be angry or sad.
"I didn't know how to bring it up," he admitted. "You seemed happy, but you stopped smiling. I kept thinking after you came home, in time you'll be your old self and I'll see your beautiful smile that I miss, but it's too rare."
"It'll take time, Nathaniel."
"I'll wait."
Wash shook herself out of her funk. Once again, history was repeating and she wasn't going to be around for the outcome this time. She started making plans.