Sunday Evening - Prison - With Rito, Oshizu, Yami, and Mea
"I still can't believe we're breaking into prison," Rito whimpered as the four of them slinked past security, incredibly grateful for the cloaking devices and extendable tethers that Sallem had provided when he contacted him yesterday. "We could get in huge trouble for this."
"Then why don't you just stay behind?" Mea asked him as she walked slowly to avoid making a loud noise every time her peg leg struck the ground. "We can handle this just fine without you."
"Are you really the one to be saying that?!" Rito hissed quietly. "Why did you even come along with us? This is really dangerous."
"I like this kind of atmosphere," Mea smiled, not that anyone could see it. "It give me a nice homey feeling." She left it unsaid that she hoped this place would bring Yami back to the darkness of the assassin world.
"Your tastes are disturbing." Yami deadpanned, unaware that her words hurt Mea more than she intended. "This is where the scum of the world lives. I'm only here because Rito asked me to protect him and Oshizu from the ghost we're hunting." That drove a metaphorical arrow through Mea's heart.
"I'd just like to say that I'm the most scared out of anyone here." Oshizu whimpered as they dodged a guard. "I've spent 400 years listening to ghost stories from people who spent the night at whatever place I was living, and a lot of them were about dangerous criminals."
"Do you guys think you could keep it down?" Rito whispered as the tip-toed through the mess hall. "I don't think I should have to remind you all that our cloaking devices don't block sound."
"If you're worried about making noise, I think I can help you there." Yami offered as she morphed some of her hair into an arm and slammed a random convict face first into his food tray. This set off an instant chain reaction of all the other prisoners laughing at him, the splatter-faced convict attacking the first guy he saw when he pulled his face from his food, everyone else joining in a huge riot, and the guards struggling to break it up.
"It's seriously this easy to send a prison into a riot." Rito sweatdropped, not bothering to keep him voice quiet anymore, as there was no way they could be overheard now.
"I've been forced to make distractions in rough areas before," Yami explained as they walked out of the mess hall. "It's not something I'm proud of, but I'm glad it's useful to you."
"So exactly who is it we're here to capture today?" Oshizu whimpered, the prison getting scarier for her by the second. "Please tell me you found out that it's just someone who died here for something minor? Like unpaid parking tickets, or tax evasion?"
"No such luck, I'm afraid." Rito shook his head, causing Oshizu to tear up. "Based on the evidence I've gathered, the most likely target this time is an American man named Johnny Lucius. He came to Japan about 20 years ago, and almost immediately after arriving killed 13 people at the veteran's hospital." Oshizu clung to him for security the moment he said that.
"Why would anyone do something like that?" Oshizu shivered nervously. "And what even makes you so sure that it's him we're after?"
"Racism." Rito sighed sadly. "According to archives, his dad had died in World War II against Japanese troops when he was just a kid, and he held a festering grudge against our nation ever since. He committed suicide in prison 7 years ago, after years of being heckled by the other inmates. He didn't even speak Japanese, so the constant taunting and harassment in a language he didn't even understand finally got to him. As for why I think it's him..." He paused for a moment, contemplating whether he should continue, before shaking his head. "Well, let's just say I have good reasons for suspecting that it's him." He knew he didn't need to say anything for Yami to understand, and Mea seemed to be smart and odd enough to get it, so he stayed quiet to spare Oshizu the gruesome details.
"Do you think he's going to be any trouble?" Mea asked almost eagerly, slightly unnerving Rito and catching Yami's suspicions. They both knew she obviously had some connection to something big, since she was currently living pretty much under house arrest with one of Sallem's brothers. Not to mention that her attitude towards breaking into prison to capture the ghost of a deranged serial killer was too happy by any standards. They had their guard up in case she tried something, but Yami couldn't help feeling that there was something a bit too familiar about her.
"...The articles on him did say that he was pretty good with a knife," Rito admitted hesitantly, causing Oshizu to cling to him even tighter, her folds of fat squishing around his body. "But with Yami here, there shouldn't be any trouble." He quickly added, tapping Yami on the shoulder to signal her to back him up.
Suddenly, Yami drew to an abrupt halt, causing Rito to bump into her, Oshizu to bump into Rito, and Mea to bump into Oshizu. "There's someone here." Yami warned everyone as she shifted her hand into a blade. "Everyone get in a circle. If all eyes are outward, we can't be caught off guard."
"Is it Johnny?" Oshizu squeaked, comically trying to hide her blubbery frame behind Rito's body.
"In my experience, things usually get worse from this point." Mea commented, her expression and tone very deadly serious. Quickly noticing the suspicious looks she was getting from the others, she floundered for an excuse. "Or at least... that's what I've seen in movies." She said pathetically.
"We're gonna have to have a talk about your crime stained past once this is over." Rito snarked at Mea.
"I'm totally busted, aren't I?" Mea pouted in defeat.
"Blah! Blah! Blah! Speak English you damned Yellow Monkeys!" Shouted a rude haunting voice from nowhere in English. "I may not be able to see ya, but I can damn well smell your piss-stained stink! Isn't it bad enough I had to deal with you fuckers in life? Now I'm being forced to endure this shit in death too?!"
As the voice of Johnny droned on, a familiar sound caught Yami's ears. "Look out!" She shouted as she rushed behind Rito and formed her hand into an intricate shield, blocking the knife that was headed towards the back of his neck.
"Thanks for the save, Yami." Rito gulped as Oshizu fell to her knees at how close they both came to being stabbed.
"Pull yourselves together," Yami commanded as she hoisted Oshizu up by the scruff of her neck. "This ghost is obviously very dangerous. We can't afford to be careless."
"Just die already, you shits!" Johnny exploded as the cell bars rattled, and knives flew out of the kitchen and surrounded them.
"We're going to be cut to ribbons!" Shrieked Oshizu, prompting Rito to slap her.
"Snap out of it and hold them off!" Rito demanded frantically as the knives flew in at high speed, only to stop just inches from their marks. "Thanks for the save, Oshizu." He sighed in relief.
"What the fuck?!" Johnny shouted as the bars rattling abruptly stopped. "What's going on here?! Which one of you bastards is messing with my mojo?!"
"He's really strong." Oshizu grunted as she pushed the knives away telekinetically. "I'm putting up a barrier to protect us, but with his power pushing against mine, I don't think it'll last long."
"Where is he though?" Mea asked as she rapidly scanned the room with her one eye. "His voice is echoing from everywhere, and I can't get a visual." Even though she wasn't vocal about it, this situation had her slightly unnerved as well. While she was used to criminals and killers, being on this planet had not been good for her on either a physical or mental level.
"I'm trying my best to sense his presence, but he moves too fast and hides himself too well." Oshizu strained as subtle ripples in the air emanated from her. "I think I might be able to predict his next movements, but I'll need one of you to hit him there fast and hard."
"If he stays within 5 meters of us, I can reach him instantly." Yami offered as she deflected a knife that had wormed through the barrier.
"Aww, what's the matter Chinkies?" Johnny remarked rudely as the knives kept circling the group, occasionally making another bid to get through. "Running out of juice? 'Cuz I've still got mountains of rage left to split your squinty faces in half!"
"Okay, I don't even speak his language, and even I can tell that's incredibly racist." Mea scowled, her temper on its last nerve. "Hey, Oshizu was it? Where's he going to be in two seconds?"
"Uhmm... Over by that cell door, I think." She guessed, and no sooner did she do so than a large laser fired right by her head and slammed into an invisible Johnny, knocking his through the door and setting off an alarm. "What just happened?" Oshizu sweatdropped nervously.
"I think I have a hunch," Rito said as he grabbed Mea by the arm, catching her mid-transformation. This caught even her off guard, as she assumed that her cloaking device would keep her safe for long enough for her to change, fire, and change back. "Mind explaining why you seem to have the same powers as Yami?"
"...They're not exactly the same." Mea defended pitifully as she shifted her hand from a laser cannon back to normal. "I was made after Yami was, so my powers are a later version."
"DAMN YOU FUCKING CHINKS!" Johnny shouted in his usual crass English as the now visible ghost righted himself. He wore an orange prison jumpsuit, was incredibly gaunt with sparse white hair, and his skin somehow managed to be wrinkled and pulled tight against his face at the same time, making him look like freakishly like a sun-dried corpse. "I don't know how you did that, but I'm gonna enjoy taking you all apart!"
Wasting no time now that her target was visible, Yami sprung into the air, and dive-bombed Johnny with her foot changed into a giant mace, making a huge crater in the ground and crushing the vile ghost. "You're very offensive." She deadpanned to his unconscious form.
"Umm..." Rito stared in surprise at the devastation his loli lover had wrought. "Nice job."
"Don't mention it," Yami shrugged it off as she grabbed Mea. "You however, have some serious explaining to do when we get out of here."
"Uh, shouldn't Rito capture the ghost before anything else?" Mea reminded everyone evasively.
"Already done." Rito interjected, the Poltergust rattling with the newly contained serial killer ghost, and the room starting to flood with confused guards. "Let's just get out of here and feed Oshizu the curse energy."
"We'll have to do it the other way around, actually." Oshizu said as she put the nozzle of the Poltergust to her mouth and switched it to 'blow'. Within moments, she'd eaten the energy. "And here comes the digestion." Suddenly, a huge cloud of glittery smoke burst from Oshizu, covering the escape of the four ghost hunters.
Yuuki Household - With Everyone
"And that's pretty much my story in a nutshell." Mea said, wrapping up her explanation of her origins and reasons for being on Earth.
"You came here to kill my boyfriend?" Nana stared in shock at her friend.
"No, no! Not me personally!" Mea denied quickly. "Just make Yami-onee-chan do it so she'd come back to space with me."
"And how's that been working out for you?" Ryoko asked sarcastically, sparing a quick glance at her injuries.
"I didn't count on the Cortez Siblings being so merciless." Mea pouted as she rubbed the scarred tissue where her left arm used to be.
"I'll never kill Rito," Yami said sternly, her current position straddling her boyfriends lap reinforcing that point. "So don't think you can make me."
"...I know that now." Pouted Mea reluctantly. "I could tell by the way you protected him in the prison that you'd never hurt him. I just wanted my onee-chan."
"Well, if nothing else, you've certainly got a mother now." Mikan noted, obviously referring to how the amputee girl was currently nestled in between Tearju's boobs, the woman hugging her mercilessly.
"You don't need to worry anymore," Tearju reassured the girl. "I've talked with Jackson, and he feels you're ready to come into our care now."
"Do I have to?" Whined Mea. Honestly, between this and her old residence, she couldn't decide which was worse.
"It's not so bad," Momo told the living weapon. "I'm sure you'll love being in Rito's harem! The orgies are just to die for!"
"Hold on a second! Where's this coming from all of a sudden!?" Panicked Rito, once a common occurrence, now somewhat unusual.
"That actually sounds like a good idea," Yui of all people said. "I could really go for some action right now. Since I'm already pregnant, it'll be fine if I don't bother with a condom."
"Wait a second! What are you guys doing?!" Rito panicked as Ryoko grabbed him before he could run away.
"Girls have needs, Rito." Ryoko grinned as she hauled him upstairs bridal-style. "Honestly, I'd think you'd know that by now."
"Am I the only one who feels that this is getting out of hand?" Mikan deadpanned. "You guys can quit the joke now. It's not funny anymore."
"Joke?" Rito parroted as Ryoko set him down. "You mean you guys were just pulling my leg?"
"Some of us were, at least." Nana rolled her eyes at her twin.
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Momo lied poorly, before her gaze wandered to Mea. "But in the event that we were serious, is there anyone here who'd be interested in joining in the fun?" Her eyes then drifted to Oshizu.
Oshizu blushed and curled herself up as best she could around her now 540 pound body, Mea blinked curiously, and Mikan just rolled her eyes before raising her hand, much to Rito's shock and fear. "Psyche." Mikan stuck her tongue out teasingly. "As if I'd sleep with my own brother."
"...I might like to watch sometime," Mea admitted, gaining several weird stares. While she was naive about sex, and didn't know what she said wrong, she quickly tried to amend her statement. "But only so I can get a good idea of how it works, then I'll do it for real!" There was a long and awkward pause before Yami karate chopped her on the head. "Owwie!"
"You, watch your step around us from now on," Yami scolded her sister. "Because if you step out of line, I will find out." Heading up the stairs, she gave Rito a quick kiss. "Goodnight, Rito."
"I think I'll be getting off to bed now too," Ryoko yawned. "And you're gonna be my snuggle pillow tonight, my future hubby~!" She said as she squeezed Rito next to her face.
"So long as you weren't serious about having sex tonight." Rito relented as everyone but Mikan ventured upstairs. "I've had a long day, and I just want to sleep easy tonight."
Once everyone was upstairs, Mikan signed as she sunk into her seat. "When will I just be honest about my feelings? Yui's already pregnant, and the others probably aren't far behind. I don't care if it is incest, I just want to marry my brother." Looking around the room, she put her face in her hands and groaned. "I can't believe I just said this out loud!"
Wednesday - School - With Rito
"Another day, another cardio routine." Rito remarked nonchalantly as he ran down the hall, an angry mob of several male students chasing him. "Just once, I'd like to go through an entire day without all this running." The day had started off so simple, no different than any other. Then, as it so happened, Run had invited her friend Kyouko over to see the school for the day. Either that, or Kyouko had invited herself, based on Run's reaction, it was pretty hard to tell for certain. The how and why were inconsequential though, for the moment she'd arrived, all the boys in school who still had a habit of chasing Rito around were united in force to prevent him from getting another hottie, even if he barely even knew her.
"You ever feel like you're living life in a rut?" Sallem asked as he literally rocketed up next to Rito out of nowhere with his rocket feet, catching him off-guard and causing him to stumble. "Whoa there, Slick!" Sallem remarked as he caught Rito by the scruff of his shirt and set him back to running before the mob could catch him. "You were almost loser bait for a second there."
"What are you doing here?" Rito asked disapprovingly. "Aren't you able to muck up my life enough remotely?"
"Of course I can." Sallem remarked coolly as he flew in front of Rito backwards. "Being here in person every so often is just a professional courtesy. So how is your harem progressing, he asks as if he doesn't already know." He smirked slyly.
Rito shook his head tiredly. "No matter what I say, it's gonna be more or less the same to you, isn't it?"
"Not true," Sallem deadpanned seriously. "My brothers and I, excluding Victor, are building up our own harems at the moment, so it interests me as to the progress you're having."
Rito mulled over his options for a moment, until an interesting bit of recent events worked into his head, bringing a devious look to his face.
"I don't like that look on your face." Sallem remarked uneasily. "That's the look I get whenever I'm about to ruin somebody's day."
"Yui's pregnant," Rito said calmly, causing the blood and mechanical fluids to leave Sallem's face. "Which means there's gonna be another catgirl in the neighborhood pretty soon, possibly more if she has a litter like regular cats do." Sallem fell face forward in an awkward cartwheel before quickly righting himself. "Have fun with your allergies, Sallem."
"I hate being out-Trolled." Sallem scowled, before brightening up. "Although I have to give you props for getting so good at it so quickly." He said proudly. "In fact, I'm so happy for you that I'm gonna help you get away from those losers." He remarked as he pulled out his remote.
"These guys are actually no trouble at all," Rito brushed off the offer. "I like the exercise actually."
"In that case, I'll just amuse myself further then." Sallem grinned wider as he pressed a button on his remote, and the rest of the hallway suddenly cut off to an old-fashioned, western-style, dead-end hallway with three doors on each side. "Aaaaaand, CUE THE YAKETY SAX!" He laughed as he pressed another button on the remote, and the music started, and all other sound stopped.
Hallway Chase Scene!
Taking the initiative, and well aware of how Sallem's mind worked, Rito ran to the last door on the right and rushed into it, the mob following right behind him, with one guy being nice enough to close it. Then Rito ran out of the middle door on the left and rushed into the first one on the right, just before two halves of the mob rushed between each door in the back, passing each other without a second glance.
Lala and Run came out of the door Rito just entered, looking confused as to how they got there, when half the mob led by Saruyama came out of the middle left door and chased them in a circle before they followed them into the far left door. Then the half of the mob led by Saruyama rushed out of the far right door in fear and ran to the first left, as they were being chased by an irate Yami and Mea, both of whom were toting around over-sized weapon hands.
Then Ryoko came out of the middle left door, while Tearju came out of the middle right, and both of them were wearing lacy black lingerie. While Tearju looked embarrassed, Ryoko didn't seem to care, and actually looked at her old friend in admiration. Then Rito popped out of the last door on the left, and when Ryoko saw him, she grabbed Tearju and tackled him through the last door on the right.
Then Zastin suddenly entered from the window at the end of the hall, and rushed forward to get away from an angry monkey that was chasing him for some reason, with Saki chasing close behind with a broom. And then an old janitor passed between the far doors, sweeping with a 'seen-it-all' kind of expression. Then Sallem hovered between to two closest doors, carrying a picket sign that said 'Screwy Ain't It?' and wearing a mischievous grin like he always did.
Then a baffled Yui riding a giant realistic flying tiger with a rainbow trail coming out of its butt flew between the middle doors. Rito then quickly ran out of the back left door in nothing but his underwear, while Kyouko rushed out of the front right door, and both of them slammed gut first into the rainbow trail and rested on it like a clothesline before it vanished and they both fell to the floor. Then the angry mob (now heavily injured) came out of the back right door, and tried to rush Rito before he grabbed Kyouko bridal style on impulse, and rushed into the front right door, the mob following close behind.
After that Mikan walked out of the middle left door with a large trout in her arms and a bored expression on her face. Quickly figuring out what was going on based on the music, she dropped the fish and calmly walked into the first left door. Then Rito, still in his boxers, backed out of the far right door while Run was clinging onto him in tears, and Kyouko was backing out of the far left door, trying to deal with Lala, who was asking for an autograph. Rito and Kyouko bumped into each other and jumped in a spook, before rushing forward and falling on the trout, leaving them and Run in a tangled pile, with Lala standing over them in confusion. Then The Principal rushed in through the window, and Rito quickly grabbed all three girls and rushed into the first left door, leaving The Principal to slip on the fish like a skateboard, and slide down the hall.
Next, a stamped of hamsters rushed out of all the left doors at once, carrying Rito with Run and Kyouko sitting on his lap out of the far door, Mikan and Mea out of the middle door, and Sallem out of the first door. Then the hamsters threw their cargo out the window, with Sallem flying off when they tossed him out last. After that, the hamsters rushed into the right doors, the hallway turned back to normal, and the music came to a winding stop.
Outside - With Rito, Run, Kyouko, Mikan, and Mea
"What just happened?" A stunned Kyouko asked, not even noticing that she was still in Rito's lap with Run.
"It's a complex and disorienting story." Rito told her. "But the long and short of it is, nobody wants to talk about it."
"And I don't want to hear about it either." Mikan said calmly as she stood up and dusted herself off. Once she got a look at Rito, though the only external acknowledgement she gave was a quirked eyebrow, inwardly she panicked in embarrassment at the sight of her brother in his boxers. "You may want to take this time to look for where your clothes went though." She joked before she turned and left in what appeared to be practiced ease, even though her face quickly released into a panicked fluster once she was sure they couldn't see her expression.
"Oddly enough, this is really one of the most normal things to happen to me today." Rito sighed as he stood upright, helping Run and Kyouko up as well. "Run, do you have a cell phone I could borrow? I need to call Lala and have her pick up my spare set of clothes."
"A who-now with the what-now?" Run asked vacantly as she stared dreamily at Rito. While he wasn't overly muscular, regular running for his life had given him an athletic build, and Run was not one to pass up an opportunity to appreciate.
"Run, focus." Rito snapped his fingers in front of her face, snapping her out of her lustful daze. "I need a cell phone. Well, technically I need pants, as well as some other clothes if I can manage it, but right now, the cell phone takes priority."
"You don't really need to get dressed right now, do you?" Mea asked as she climbed piggyback onto Rito, her one hand taking care to rub his torso as much as possible. "I can cover you up just fine, you know."
"Hey!" Exclaimed Run in protest as she she jumped up and latched onto Rito's front. "If anyone is going to cover my Rito, then it's going to be me!"
"This is getting to be too regular an occurrence for my liking." Rito deadpanned as he took a moment to adjust Run's position on him, when he noticed something odd. "I didn't notice it too much before, but you're really growing your hair out, Run." He said as he ran some very long strands of her hair through his fingers, noticing that her hair reached down to her hindquarters now. "How did it get this long in such a short time?"
"I'm honestly not sure," Run admitted as she twirled a strand in her fingers. "I've tried to get it cut recently, but it just... well, see for yourself." She said as she handed Rito a pair of scissors.
"Do I even want to know why you're carrying these around with you?" Rito asked suspiciously.
"You'll see when you try to cut this." Run sighed as she held up a strand of her hair.
"I'm not gonna be able to cut it, am I?" Rito guessed in a display of savvy.
"Afraid not," Run said as Rito got back to his original goal, and skipped the middleman by just subtly pat Run down for a cell phone. "I've started worrying about it, so I was going to go see Mikado-sensei today and see if something was wrong with me."
"Why go to Ryoko when I'm here and willing to help?" Sallem asked as he hovered down to the ground, receiving a venomous glare from Run in response. "I can tell what you're thinking, so don't bother saying it. Yes, I pulled many a cruel prank on you over the years, but I have a good reason for that. I just can't stand the homosexual or the transgender, that's all there is to it. I'm not openly malicious to either of you as people, I'm just a raging, passive-aggressive homophobic jackass. Now that you and Ren are separated, I don't have any reason to make your lives miserable anymore."
"You traumatized me for years!" Run shouted at him as Rito talked to Lala on her phone. "Do you think that flimsy and hateful explanation will let you off the hook?!"
"Not a chance." Sallem admitted smugly. "Though I do believe that my incomprehensible level of political, economic, military, and physical power will. Now do you want to remain ignorant of a possibly fatal alien affliction, or would you rather find out what it is that's making your hair indestructible, and potentially deal with it?" Run's silent glare was angry, but also with a hint of resignation. "That's what I though. Now hold still while I scan your hair for data." As he said this, a wide beam shot out of his eyes and scanned Run up and down.
"Lala is on her way with a change of clothes for me." Rito said as he hung up Run's phone and handed it back to her, before turning to look at Kyouko. "You've been awfully quiet since we landed. Is everything alright."
"What?!" Jumped Kyouko nervously, coming out of some sort of daze. "I'm fine! I'm fine! Don't worry about me, I'll be perfectly alright!" Turning around, she tried to still her breath. 'Now I can tell what Run sees in him,' She thought as she recalled all the things she'd heard about him from her friend. 'He's strong, caring, protective, and good looking, just like she said he was. I wonder what else she said about him was true.' As her mind drifted to unusual places, Rito just stared at the back of her head in confusion, for once in recent memory not being able to put the pieces together.
"Ah-ha! I see the problem you're having!" Sallem smirked that crooked grin of his as his eyes stopped scanning Run. "Rito, do you remember me mentioning those mutagens that were 'lost' in Earth's atmosphere?"
"More than a little vaguely." Rito answered bluntly, having a constant reminder of the event in the form of NaMo. "So you're saying one of those mutagens is making Run's hair this way." It may have been phrased as a question, but it most certainly wasn't anything he didn't already know from just the one hint.
"Bingo-Bango," Sallem remarked as he pulled out a hologram notepad. "According to the data files, this formula was meant to promote healthy hair growth, prevent split ends, tangles, and discoloration, and give your hair a permanent glossy shine."
"Well it's doing all of that just fine," Run remarked in a protesting tone of voice. "I'm actually pretty happy about it, since it means I don't have to waste too much money on hair care. What I want to know is why I can't cut it."
"It's a prototype mutagen," Sallem said as he playfully bopped her on the head. "There are bound to be a few kinks in the formula. Things like accelerated hair growth and nearly-indestructible follicles are to be expected. You should just consider yourself lucky that you didn't lose all your hair instead of being forced to keep it." No sooner did he say this than did Run search her hair for bald spots in a panic. "Though there's also the possibility that you could grow an indestructible beard, or that it will also affect your body hair." Run then began frantically checking every surface of her body. After letting her squirm for a bit, during which Lala arrived with a change of clothes for Rito, he added. "Though honestly, my scans show that neither of those options is more than 1% likely." At those words, Run just pouted and glared. "And I suppose that's my cue to leave."
"Before you go, I have a question for you," Rito interjected, now fully clothed. "And you're going to answer it, or else."
"Normally I'd ask 'Or else, what?' but I'm in a good mood today, so I'll let it slide." Sallem joked. "Besides, you seem to have something big on your mind, so I'll hear you out at least."
"It's about you and your brothers," Rito began, eliciting a knowing and somewhat proud grin from Sallem. "You all seem incredibly powerful in your own right, and for some reason you all seem to be united in one goal. But that makes me curious. What exactly is so big that it could make all of you put up a united front? Forgive me for saying this, but brothers or no, you don't seem like the type to work together unless it's something deeply personal to all of you. Especially since I've studied up on your brothers a bit, and Maverick and Jackson alone seem to be complete polar opposites."
"Well, you've got us cornered on all fronts there." Sallem admitted shamelessly. "Maverick is a crime lord of inter-dimensional proportions, as well as the ruler of Apokolipse ever since he offed the old ruler Darkseid. While Jackson is one of the biggest heroes any galaxy anywhere has ever seen. Victor is a known rapist with a victim count numbering in the thousands, even if all his victims were complete assholes. I'm one of the biggest wild cards in all of existence." He admitted with no small amount of pride, before his expression changed to the Excalibur Face. "And don't even get me started on our sister."
"Blech! I hate her!" Lala uttered distastefully. "Every time she came over, she was the biggest jerk in history!"
"Agreed," Peke seconded with a raised wing. "I wiped the experiences with her from my memory banks, and I still get nightmares sometimes."
"She needs to die." Run said bluntly.
"Is his sister really that bad?" Kyouko whispered to Rito, who just shrugged in response, as unaware as she was that Sallem even had a sister.
"We don't speak with Mary Sue anymore," Sallem deadpanned in response to her question, his arms crossed in anger. "We just give her one attractive asshole a year, and in exchange she keeps herself confined to one planet. Granted, she's a bigger jerk to the people of that planet than Doflamingo is to the people of Dressrosa, and just people in general, but the people on that planet are evil on a genetic level anyway, so we don't really care."
Rito didn't know who Doflamingo was, and he could only assume Mary Sue was Sallem's much despised sister, so he just continued. "So who exactly is it that you and your brothers are so dead-set against? I'm assuming it's the three ghosts that are haunting me and causing so many problems for everyone around me."
"Smart kid," Sallem smiled as he pat him on the head like a dog. "You're right to assume all this. Yes, my brothers and I do have a personal vendetta against the ghosts haunting you. Now would you care to guess why?"
"I'm assuming it's something incredibly bad, since you're chasing after them even after you've already killed them." Rito guessed. "You and your brothers were the ones to kill them, right?"
"Guilty as charged." Sallem smirked as he raised his hand like a child being called for attendance, before activating his rocket feet. "Alright, that's enough of an investigation for now. I'll see you again when it's time to purge the ghosts from your body."
"Just one more question," Rito beckoned for him to wait. "Gathering up harems... it's really just you and your brothers gathering up forces to deal with the trio haunting me, isn't it?"
"Somewhat," Shrugged Sallem sheepishly. "We did set out to gather harems as a pretense for our goal, but we really do love the women we've chosen. The reason I'm telling you this now is because the evils haunting you aren't in a position to do anything about us anymore. All they can do is wait for the destruction of their very souls." Before anyone could ask what he meant, he sped off into the sky, disappearing in a flash.
"That guy never stops giving me the willies." Rito shuddered as he ushered the girls along. "Come on, we need to get back to class. Today's jog has already gotten too out of hand."
After School - Zoo - With Rito, Oshizu, Yui, Run, and Kyouko
"So let me get this straight," Kyouko began, recapping what she'd been told after insisting to be allowed to come along. "Your first crush is in a coma because of some curse. The ghosts who made that curse are haunting you. They made a spell circle around the city using various other ghosts as channels for their power. And now you and your harem are hunting them like Ghostbusters, siphoning off their energy, and feeding that energy to your ghost girlfriend, so she can get fat enough to exorcize them and destroy the curse?"
"I'm not his girlfriend!" Oshizu insisted, blushing so hard that it was obvious she was interested in becoming so.
"Well, I'll admit that it does sound completely crazy when you put it like that." Rito said nervously, not noticing Oshizu's outburst due to his own embarrassment. "But yes, that's essentially where we stand."
Kyouko fixed Rito in her gaze long and hard, both contemplating whether or not to believe him, and how mad she should be at how the boy her best friend loves is such a player. Finally, she relented her glare with a disappointed sigh. "I suppose I'll believe your story for now, but I've got my eye on you."
"That makes two of us." Yui said sternly as she dug her nails into Rito's shoulder, actually drawing blood and a fearful whimper. "Remind me why you brought her along, again?" She hissed to her lover.
"Run had the day off, so she wanted to come with," Rito whispered quickly. "And Kyouko doesn't trust me too much, so she refused to let Run go alone."
"I think you mean it makes three of us," Run insisted as she grabbed onto Rito's free arm, pressing her breasts into his arm. "If you think I'm going to let you go on more dates without me, you've got another thing coming." She hissed to Rito. "And since Kyouko seems pretty mad at you right now, we have to make it look like I'm your favorite."
"I'm really not sure that follows." Rito pleaded as both Yui and Run latched onto him tighter and tighter. "And can you both please ease up on your grip? I think you're cutting off my circulation."
"No!" Hissed the girls in unison.
"Would any of you girls like to know about the ghost we're after today?" Rito said in a rush, panicking for an escape.
"It might be helpful for us to know what we're up against," Oshizu cut in as she tried to pry Run and Yui off with her telekinetic abilities, but to surprisingly little avail. "So long as it's not some kind of dog that is. I really don't want to have to deal with something like that."
Suddenly, Yui blinked in confusion before relaxing in comprehension. "Oh yeah, since this is a zoo, this ghost is more likely to be an animal of some kind than anything else."
"And zoos have hundreds of animals living in them." Run pointed out. "How exactly would you know which one of their former residents is the one with the curse fragment?"
"A combination of profiling recent unexplained incidents with all the animals to die here over the past 5 years." Rito remarked calmly, glad that Run and Yui were loosening their grips. "I've determined that the most likely candidate is a Big Cat. I don't know which kind exactly, since this zoo lost a lot of animals in an earthquake a few years back, but I know the most likely location."
"I have a question," Kyouko raised her hand as if they were in school, even waiting until Rito called on her to continue. "Exactly what do you mean by Big Cat?"
"Big Cat is a shorthand term for one of eight varieties of wild Felidae." Yui recited, as if directly quoting a book, and knowing her fondness for cats, she likely was. "While not an official scientific classification, many use it to describe; Lions, Tigers, Jaguars, and Leopards, while a broader definition of the term also includes; Cougars, Cheetahs, Snow Leopards, and Clouded Leopards."
After a several seconds long pause to soak in the information, Rito awkwardly continued. "Right... Well, pretty much what she said is what we could be dealing with here, so stay sharp. We don't want whichever one of those this ghost is to get the drop on us. Any other questions?"
"I have one." Oshizu began. "If we're looking for a cat of some kind, then why are we in the aquarium?" Suddenly, the entire group turned to her with questioning, disbelieving, of just plain disappointed glances. For several seconds she just blinked vacantly, wondering what she said to provoke this reaction. Then all of a sudden, a lightbulb turned on and she sheepishly scratched the back of her head. "Right... just forget I said anything."
"I have a question too." Run began, a slight trepidation in her tone. "What are we going to do if more than one Big Cat is involved in all this?"
"Didn't you hear the explanation we gave earlier?" Yui questioned right back. "There is only one ghost at each point of the curse star. The ghosts haunting Rito only need one ghost per location."
"There's an entire pack of Big Cats in the direction you're looking, isn't there?" Rito deadpanned, receiving a nod before he and everyone else turned in the direction Run was looking. While everyone else was scared stiff at being stared down by a pack of angry ghost cats, Rito just looked at them all in a bored yet slightly exasperated expression. "I count two lions, two tigers, two cheetahs, and two leopard, and a panther. Judging by what little I've managed to learn about Big Cats since I figured out what we would be up against today, every one of them except the panther is a female. What are your thoughts, Yui?"
"Run now, and run quickly." Yui uttered fearfully.
"I was hoping for something a bit more helpful." Rito deadpanned, right before all nine cat ghosts pounced.
"KYAAAAAA!" Screeched Kyouko as she threw fire at the ghosts on reflex, managing to ignite both cheetah and one leopard before the rest got the idea to simply turn intangible and fly through the fire.
"And off we go!" Rito remarked as he grabbed a still petrified Yui and Run and ran in one direction, while Oshizu and Kyouko ran off in another, the Big Cats splitting into two groups as well, while the panther stayed behind and observed while tending to the three fallen pack members.
Group 1 - Rito, Yui, and Run
"Yui, do something!" Demanded Run, two tigers hot on their tail.
"What do you expect me to do?!" Asked Yui.
"You're the cat expert, and part cat!" Run shouted. "Don't you speak their language, or something?"
"I do, but these cats are like cavemen!" Yui panicked as one of the tigers nearly bit her tail. "Their language is so choppy and disjointed that I can barely make it out!"
"We really need to work out some kind of plan here." Rito remarked, oddly calm despite the situation. "What CAN you make out of what they're saying, Yui?"
"Not much," Yui answered between breaths. "Just that they don't want us here. They're saying something about the orders of an Alpha and not wanting to split-up too, but I'm not sure who they're talking about exactly."
"The Alpha is probably one of the ghosts haunting me." Rito remarked as they rounded a corner at breakneck speeds. "I don't know what they mean by not wanting to split-up, since they're clearly going for a divide and conquer strategy, but whatever. That probably won't help us, so what if we do something to scare them? That will expose their weak points to capture."
"And how do you expect to do that?" Run asked as she struggled to keep up. "They're ghosts! And more than that, they're animals! The only thing that can scare them is a bigger and stronger animal!"
"Run, you may not be aware of it, but I think you just solved our problem." Rito beamed at her as he turned down another hallway, the girls right behind.
"Good," Run panted. "Remind me to ask you what it was I said if we make it out alive. I can't quite keep up with myself right now."
"Oh no you don't!" Yui shouted as she grabbed Run and hoisted her fireman style. "There's no way I'm leaving a sister behind to be mangled by wild ghost cats!"
"Sister?" Run asked breathlessly as she wondered how Yui was still keeping pace with Rito, despite carrying another person on her back.
"Sister Girlfriend," Yui smiled at Run out of the corner of her face, nearly causing Rito to trip up. "After all the things we've been through since you arrived here on Earth, you're definitely part of Rito's harem." After a few second of no reply, Yui turned to Run to see if she was okay, and saw she'd passed out. 'She's either seriously out of shape, or just passed out from shock. Though which shock exactly, I'm not sure.' Yui deadpanned mentally. "Rito! When are we getting to this plan of yours?!"
"Just a little further!" He shouted back as they ran into another exhibit, the tigers following right behind. Suddenly, just off-screen, there were yowls of terror, a vacuum whooshing, and the trio calmly left the deep sea exhibit, Run still unconscious on Yui's back. "Just like I thought. One good look at those things will scare anyone, or anything." Rito remarked as he twirled the Poltergust nozzle back into place.
"They sure freaked me out," Yui shuddered. "I never knew angler-fish reproduced like that. And all those pictures and sound-effects they had just made the whole thing creepier."
"Well, now we know neither of these two ghosts were the one housing the curse." Rito remarked. "I'm just worried that the others may be in trouble with the other four."
"Rito, one of them can generate fire, while the other one is a powerful psychic." Yui reminded him. "I think they're going to be okay until we get to them."
Group 2 - Oshizu and Kyouko
"This is not okay!" Panicked Kyouko as she and Oshizu tried to outpace the two lionesses and the leopard following them. "Why isn't my fire working on them anymore?! It worked fine on three of them!"
"That's just because you caught them off-guard!" Oshizu answered as she fired a psychic blast at the group, dispersing them for a moment before they regrouped. "Now they know what to expect, and it won't work as well anymore. We need to keep running until we can't anymore."
"With how fat you are, that probably won't be too long." Kyouko remarked as they rounded a corner. "No offense."
"None taken," Oshizu smiled. "I like being fat. It just means I'm a powerful spirit."
"So what's the deal with you and that Rito guy?" Kyouko asked. "Is he going out with you, or something?"
"He is not!" Denied Oshizu, completely red-faced.
"But you wish he was, don't you?" Kyouko countered, holding a flaming finger up when Oshizu tried to respond. "Don't try to deny it. I've seen Run get worked up about the guy lots of times."
"Is it that obvious?" Oshizu muttered as they rushed around another corner.
"Pretty much," Kyouko said as she launched another fireball at the cats. "What I don't get is why? I mean, he's just one guy, no matter how nice, cute, or well-toned he is. Why are so many girls content to be in a harem with him as the center?"
"I'm not really sure," Oshizu admitted. "Part of it is probably because of the ghosts haunting him affecting his luck, but a big part of it is just because of who he is. He's a nice guy who put others before himself, and he just so happens to have a lot of female friends. I guess it's just natural that most of them fell in love with him." Suddenly, the pair came to a halt as they arrived at the one place they really didn't want to be.
A dead end.
"It was nice knowing you, Oshizu. For however short it was." Kyouko told her new friend as the three big cats surrounded them.
"Don't count us out just yet," Whispered Oshizu as she held out a hand to the half-alien. "I have a plan, but you have to work in-sync with me. Do you think you can manage it?"
"If it can save our lives, definitely." Kyouko answered as she grabbed the obese girl's hand, a ball of flaming psychic energy slowly forming around their joined hands.
"Let's do this thing!" The girls said as one when the cats pounced, blasting them with a combined blast of their powers. While they managed to phase through the worst of the damage, they were shocked and weren't prepared for when Rito showed up and sucked them into the Poltergust.
"And that's all she wrote." Rito said as Yui and a dizzy Run walked in behind him. "We captured the three Kyouko burned back where we first found them, and the two tigers chasing us, but none of them had the curse."
"And I could feel that none of these three had it either." Oshizu remarked. "It must be in the panther."
"He must have been smart enough to realize what was going on when we first arrived, and planned ahead for it." Yui summarized. "Be careful everyone. We have no idea where it may strike." As if on cue, the panther suddenly lunged down from above, slashing a huge hole in the Poltergust and setting free his pack before anyone could react.
"This is bad," Run gulped when she saw they were surrounded. "Very, very bad."
"Maybe not," Rito remarked as he took note of the ghosts. "Aside from the panther, they all look pretty roughed-up. I guess the beating they took and their time in the Poltergust didn't do them any favors."
"They have the advantage," Yui noted as the cats circled them. "Why don't they take advantage of it?"
"I think they're waiting for something." Oshizu said calmly as the panther stopped in front of her, and all the others halted as well. "What is it you want?"
The panther just glared at Oshizu for a while, obviously appraising her for some reason. Suddenly, it seemed to smirk as it let out a huge beam of energy at her.
"Oshizo!" Panicked the entire group, and before anyone could react, all the cat ghosts jumped into Yui, sending her tumbling onto the ground.
"Yui!" Panicked everyone as Rito knelt down beside her quickly. "Somebody bring me Oshizu, and call Ryoko too!"
"I'm perfectly fine Rito." Oshizu remarked, speaking as if through a full mouth. "I'm not sure why, but the panther just blasted the entire portion of the curse it held into me." She swallowed, and almost instantly digested the curse into another 100 or so pounds on her already morbidly obese frame in a puff of smoke. "I don't know what they did to Yui, but I'll check her out." Kneeling down beside Yui with Rito, she held her hands over her body.
"Rito? Oshizu?" Groaned Yui as she tried pushing herself into a sitting position, only for Rito to keep her her resting with her head on his lap. "What's going on? Did we win?"
"We don't really know." Run remarked. "Oshizu said that the panther let her eat the curse, but then they all jumped into you. Are you possessed or something?"
"I don't know." Yui remarked. "I don't feel possessed, but I don't feel entirely right either. Like something inside me shifted, and suddenly I'm really hungry."
"And I think I may know why." Oshizu began hesitantly. "I'm not exactly sure how to say this, but... Yui, you're pregnant."
Everyone just stared at Oshizu blankly for several seconds before Yui spoke up. "I already know that. What does that have to do with anything?"
"Well..." Oshizu hesitated. "How exactly can I explain this? While a fetus is still in the early stages of development it doesn't yet have a soul. Because of this, a properly motivated and powerful spirit can jump inside a pregnant woman, and let their soul become one with the developing baby." At this, everyone just stared nervously at Oshizu.
"Are you saying that... one of those ghosts is going to grow into my baby?" Yui asked fearfully as she held her hands to her abdominal area.
"It's not what you think!" Oshizu hurriedly tried to reassure her. "Keep in mind that your baby didn't even have a soul until now, so it's actually closer to reincarnation than possession, or anything like that. And they used to be animals, so given the nature of their souls, your babies won't even remember what they were like in their past lives! It'll be like nothing happened!"
Everyone let this soak in for a moment, but none more so than Rito and Yui. After all, this was their child they were talking about! To think that an evil spirit had done anything to harm it was unthinkable. Finally, after several minutes of Rito and Yui just holding each other for support, Yui spoke. "You're certain this won't have any effect on my baby." She muttered quietly.
"Positive." Oshizu reassured her. "The only way they could have memories of their past lives is if they were incredibly powerful spirits. Nothing less than S-Class would work, and those guys were all barely B-Class. I guarantee you, those babies are entirely yours and Rito's."
This seemed to set the pair at ease, as Yui noticeably calmed down, Rito rubbing her stomach in reassurance. Suddenly, Yui's eyes shot open in a different kind of fear. "Wait a second, Oshizu," She began. "When you talk about my baby, you were using plural nouns."
"Oh!" Panicked Oshizu, though she tried miserably to hide her fear at her slip-up. "I guess I was just misusing my words in the panic, that's all!"
"Oshizu," Growled Yui, her eyes narrowed in an incredibly intimidating glowing cat-like glare. "This is my body, and my future family we're talking about here. So if you don't want to be ground into 650 pounds of meat patties, I recommend you tell me everything."
"Well..." Trailed Oshizu nervously. "Normally only one ghost can use this method per fetus, but if multiple spirits jump in at once, the fetus divides into... however many ghost went in simultaneously... and they all develop to full maturity..."
Silence. Complete silence. Silence enough that even a pin wouldn't dare to drop.
Nine ghosts went into Yui. Meaning in nine months, nine babies will come out.
"The moment those brats come out of my womb, they are grounded for life." Yui seethed as her nails gouged holes in the concrete ground.
Nobody said anything else, except when Rito said she could have all the sushi she wanted forever.
Sunday Afternoon - Royal Tree Subspace - With Rito's Harem
"So this is it?" Yui remarked before taking a big bite out of a whole grilled tuna.
"Yep," Lala confirmed as she adjusted her latest invention, which looked oddly like an anteater with a curly-q tail. "With this, we should be able to measure just how powerful the ghosts haunting Rito are."
"And it's important to know this, why?" Nana asked curiously. "Sallem said that he and his brothers are gonna take care of those three when the time comes. While I am curious as to why they'd make such a big deal out of just three ghosts, why can't we just let them handle it?"
"Because I don't trust any of those four, for one thing!" Huffed Run as she dared to lean in a little closer to the machine. "Besides, I may not like them, but if these ghosts are a big enough deal to have all 4 Cortez Brothers worried, then it's a good idea to at least know what we're dealing with."
"And dare I ask exactly how this thing is supposed to measure anything?" Rito asked nervously as he tried to wiggle out of the chair Mea had shackled him to.
"That's an easy one," Lala beamed as she closed the panel she'd been working on. "Spooky-Spooky Ghosteater-Kun is just going to get a taste of the evil spirits haunting you, and then its tail will bend into a number to show us how powerful they are."
"And how exactly will it taste them?" Yami questioned as she eyed the tongue of the machine suspiciously, already turning her hair into knives to defend against anything ecchi.
"Like this!" Lala said excitedly as she pressed a button on its head. "GO!"
"Wait, wait, Lala! I'm not ready!" Panicked Rito as the tongue creeped along like an inchworm, slowly moving forward until it stuck to Rito's forehead. "GAAAAAHHHHH!" Rito shouted as he waited for the explosion or something to happen. When several seconds passed and nothing happened, he slowly opened his eyes and saw that everything was perfectly fine, though Lala was looking at him in some confusion, while everyone else was just nodding in understanding. "Never mind." He excused himself awkwardly. Apparently one of Lala's inventions besides Peke worked for once. "So what's the readout on the machine?"
"Oh, right!" Lala realized as she and everyone else twisted to see the tail. "It's an 8! That's not nearly as bad as I thought it'd be." She remarked in relief, though the fearful expressions everyone else was wearing told a different story.
"Lala..." Rito began slowly, having managed to piece matters together already, but wanting definite confirmation. "Was that 8 you saw sideways by any chance?"
"It was, but that's probably just a minor glitch in the program. Why do you ask?" Lala said innocently, unaware of the magnitude of her mistake.
"Lala," Rito said evenly, fear creeping into his voice. "I don't know how to tell you this, but a sideways 8 is the symbol for infinity." Lala stared at Rito in a gradual shift from calm confusion to fearful shock.
"I-I-I'm sure it's not really as bad as you think it is!" Lala tried desperately to reassure and pacify everyone. "I only designed the counter to go up to 999! Not to mention there are three of them, right? They couldn't possibly be all that powerful, could they?"
"It goes up to 999?" Ryoko began suspiciously. "And exactly what would you say is a good comparison to that level of power?" At this, everyone looked at Lala in nervousness and anticipation.
"Well..." Lala hesitated, already a bad sign of her answer. "I wanted the limit to be something I could easily understand, while still being the strongest thing I'd ever seen. So I used my dad's power level as the cap for Spooky-Spooky Ghosteater-Kun." At once, everyone was so silent that you could hear a pin drop.
"So let me see if I've got this straight," Nana began, her tone completely even and without emotion. "Best case scenario, each of these ghosts is about 1/3 as strong as our dad, who is strong enough to destroy a planet with ease."
"And worst case scenario, we're dealing with three gods." Rito tagged on as Yami unfastened him from his restraints.
"Hehe," Chuckled Lala nervously. "I guess that's one way to put it."
Rito hummed in contemplation for a moment, trying to process this new information into the big puzzle that was the motivations of the Cortez Brothers. One eurika moment later, he was feeling a bit better. "That would explain a lot of things," He remarked, drawing stared from everyone in anticipation of an explanation. "It still leaves a few questions though... And which is the original, if any... I wonder..." As he folded his arms and scrunched his face in deep contemplation, he suddenly because aware of the odd looks his harem was giving him. "And... none of you know what I'm talking about." He chuckled awkwardly.
"Well if you explained everything, then we'd know." Mea snarked, most of the group giving her dull looks at the hypocrisy of their statement.
"I can't really say for certain," Rito shrugged. "But if what I'm thinking is correct, then we may have just stumbled onto the biggest conspiracy in the history of the universe."
"Well, that's bad news." Ryoko sighed as she scratched her head. "Tearju and I don't exactly have the best history with conspiracies."
"Secrets like this took everything from me once," Tearju frowned, her eyes turning down to her mammoth bosom. "Is there any risk involved in all this?"
"So long as enough rumors match reality, and the Cortez Brothers aren't lying about their goal being revenge, I think things will turn out well." Rito theorized. "If what I'm afraid of is true, then we're gonna need those brothers here to help out when the time comes, whether we want them here or not."
"And let me guess," Yui pouted as she pulled on Rito's cheek. "You're going to be all secretive about what you know because you don't want to worry us?"
"Bashically." Rito grunted out through the pain of his face being stretched.
"I for one like it when he plays mysterious," Momo trilled as she latched onto her lover. "The expression he makes when it falls through is just so cute."
"I think you need glasses," Nana scolded her twin. "Now Yui, do you think you could let go of Rito's face long enough for him to tell us what his plan for the next step in all this is?"
"Since when did this pervert suddenly become the authority on planning?" Yui scoffed as she let go of her lover's face and began eating another grilled tuna. Hey, when you're pregnant with a litter of nine, you gotta eat.
"Since I started paying close attention to everything, it seems." Rito remarked as he rubbed his face. "Anyway, Nana has a point. We need to consider our next move in all this carefully. I doubt that the trio responsible for putting Haruna in a coma are gonna give up their chance to escape the Cortez Brothers without a fight. While I'm not entirely certain why a trio strong enough to wipe out planets would be afraid of these four, the fact stands that I don't want them here, and whether I trust them or not, I at least trust that they're more interested in whatever revenge they have in mind than anything else."
"Now violence is something I can understand." Smiled Mea as she changed her right hand into a laser cannon. "Just point me in the right direction, and I'll blast it to smithereens." She said in a chipper voice.
"Let's not get too trigger happy now," Nana said to her friend as she pushed the weapon arm down. "I think it would be best if we just focus on getting rid of that last ghost for the time being."
"Nana has a good point," Rito nodded. "And if what I've figured out about this last ghost is true, then we're gonna need everyone to help out. But most of all, we're gonna need Oshizu's help."
"Don't worry about a thing, Rito!" Oshizu said enthusiastically. "I'll do whatever it takes to gobble up the last portion of the curse."
"That's good to hear," Rito said appreciatively, before his expression turned a bit awkward. Before he could continue though, a faint sound caught his attention. "Get down!" He shouted as he pulled Tearju and Oshizu to the ground, pressing them as flat as their figures would allow, with everyone else following suit. Suddenly, the place where Rito was sitting not half a second ago was now occupied by a dark-skinned loli in a strikingly familiar outfit.
"Finally," Nemesis growled out. "I've finally managed to work my way past that meddlesome barrier that stupid dog put up."
"Master!" Mea cried excitedly as she rushed forward and latched onto her fellow transforming living weapon. "Protect me from the monsters!" She pleaded to her master.
"Mea, what happened to you?" Nemesis asked in confusion that could only loosely be defined as concern, as her gaze went from her eye patch, to her arm stump, to her peg leg. "It hasn't even been four months since I was purged from your body and sent flying lightyears away. How could someone of your caliber get so badly injured in such a short time? And why haven't you just regenerated your injuries?" She would have continued talking, but Mikan whacked her on the head with a frying pan from behind.
"We really don't have the time for this kind of thing." Mikan remarked as Nemesis clutched her head in pain. "Rito, decide now. Do you want her in your harem or not?" She deadpanned.
"Don't you think you're getting way too ahead of yourself?" Rito asked, internally disgusted by what he sister was implying.
"She's Mea's master, so we know she's gonna be here from now on." Mikan reasoned as Nemesis tried to lunge at her, only to be stopped by a slash to the face from Yui's claws. "I'm just setting up for the inevitable."
"Why you little brat!" Hissed Nemesis through the pain coursing through her face. "Just who do you think you-WAH!" She yelped as Ryoko grabbed her by the leg and dangled her upside-down. "What the hell is going on here!?" She demanded to know as she tried to hold her skirt down, more on reflex than anything else.
"So you're the master Mea told us about?" Ryoko remarked curiously. "Funny, I thought you'd be more dangerous than this."
"I am dangerous!" Nemesis hissed as she tried to strike Ryoko in the face, only to have her blow cushioned by Tearju's airbags. "What the-?" She remarked before being smothered by said breasts, genuinely confused now. "Get these huge things off of me!" She grunted as she tried to heave Tearju off of her, to no avail.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Apologized Tearju profusely as she got off of Nemesis. "It's just that I was so involved in the project responsible for creating you, Mea, and Yami, and I'm still not used to being so large, so sometimes I have a hard time stopping once I get going!" She said in a rush.
Nemesis face-palmed in exasperation. "Just... shut up and let me think for a second." Her eyes shifting from one person to the next, she was surprised, and in some cases, somewhat disturbed by what she saw. Catching a glimpse a Yui for a second, she curiously noted that she liked what she saw, and used her shapeshifting ability to sprout her own pair of cat ears.
"Do you want me to slash your face again?" Yui asked as she unsheathed her claws, prompting Nemesis to think for a moment, before shifting her ears back to normal. "I didn't think so."
"Let me ask you something... uh?" Rito paused awkwardly. "What exactly was your name again?"
"I never told it to you in the first place," Huffed Nemesis as she paced around Rito curiously. After appraising him for several seconds, she gave a mischievous grin, until she was lit on fire by Kyouko. "Why does this keep happening!?" She shouted in pain as she did the stop-drop-and-roll maneuver.
"I didn't like the look she was giving my Rito." Run huffed as she latched onto him.
"And since I'm not entirely sure what's going on myself, I just listened to her advice." Kyouko smiled. "Solving problems by burning them works just as well in real life as it does on TV."
*Disclaimer! Do Not Set Things On Fire In Real Life To Solve Problems! You Will Be Arrested If You Try!*
"I think I'm beginning to understand what you've been through since you arrived." Nemesis remarked towards Mea, her hair a frizzy mess before she shifted it back to normal. "At any rate, my name is Nemesis, and for the record, you all just completely ruined the dramatic introduction I had planned." She pouted bitterly.
"Are dramatic introductions usually something assassins plan out ahead of time?" Rito asked Yami curiously.
"Not at all." Yami shook her head, not even bothering to maintain visual contact on Nemesis, which was a direct insult to her abilities, as it made it clear Yami didn't consider her a threat. "A skilled assassin knows to maintain silence, and swiftness in execution at all times. Anonymity is our calling card, and invisibility is our trademark."
"Did you just paraphrase that from somewhere?" Nana asked her curiously, receiving no answer in response.
"Is anyone going to pay me any attention for an extended period of time?" Nemesis pouted bitterly. "I'm a dangerous shapeshifting assassin, ordinarily people would be freaking out when I arrive."
"Not to be rude, but you're really not the focal point of our concern right now." Rito told her as he pat her on the head, catching her completely off-guard. "And to be honest, whatever plots or trouble you may have thought you'd bring to the table probably would fall flat as little more than repetition at this point."
"How would you know that for sure?" Nemesis huffed as she swatted Rito's hand away. "I haven't even done anything yet."
"True," Rito conceded her point gracefully. "But given your attitude, and based on the fact that I could see you're not even wearing underwear, you really don't strike me as the type to do any kind of plotting outside of trying to get a rise out of people through nudity." At this, Nemesis felt a metaphorical arrow pierce through her torso. "By comparison, I'm much more used to living my life with a quite a bit more structure by this point. Yes, I have to deal with a lot of erotic issues, but it doesn't really distract me from enjoying how things are going otherwise."
"I see," Nemesis smirked. "So you're basically admitting to being erotic? Well then," She transformed into a very tall and voluptuous form in a bikini, and pressed her boobs in Rito's face. "I guess this doesn't mean anything to you then, huh?" She said mischievously, but instead of getting a rise out of him like what she'd read about him in gossip magazines, he just stared at her dully.
"I can deal with this in about half an hour." Rito said calmly as he pulled her along by her arm. "Make sure you're all ready to go by then!"
"Wait a second! Where are you going?" Nemesis demanded to know as she tried to yank away from Rito, but to no avail. "What do you think you're doing to me?! How can you even overpower me? I was built to be one of the greatest bioweapons in the galaxy!" She transformed her arm into a claw and prepared to strike, but Rito just flipped her onto the ground and continued on. "What the hell is going on here!? Mea! Do something about this upstart!" She turned to her subordinate, only to find that the harem had already roughed her up and locked her in chains. As Rito continued to pull her along, deflecting and countering any attacks she threw at him, Nemesis began to wonder if she may have made a mistake in targeting him.
Later - Abandoned Stadium
"Rito! I got the lights up and running again!" Lala called out as she ran into the lit, yet dusty area.
"Nice going Lala," Rito smiled, before turning his attention to everyone else. "Yui! Have you gotten all the strays to clear out into the halls for the night?"
"Just one more minute," Yui called, before turning to hiss at an angry looking tabby, who sulked off bitterly. "Damn, what is it about heterochromia that makes cats so stubborn?" She huffed before rubbing her belly and cooing. "None of you are going to give mommy any trouble like that, are you?"
"Nana, Momo, Run, Kyouko! Have you got the speakers and special effects wired right?!" Rito called.
"I've got all the electronics hooked up, just like one of my shows." Run answered. "How are things on your end, Kyouko?"
"Pyrotechnics are ready to boom!" Kyouko called happily, making an explosion with her powers as a demonstration.
"Nana and I are ready for color commentary and highlights!" Momo saluted.
"I'm just waiting for this whole embarrassing debacle to be over with." Nana sulked, clearly bored out of her skull.
"Yami, are you finished setting up all the equipment?" Rito asked his loli haremette as she walked by.
"I finished that three minutes after you gave me the instructions." Yami deadpanned as she walked off to the bleachers.
"You've always been my most productive lover." Rito smirked as he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, becoming pleased with himself at the faint blush now on her cheeks. "Mikan, do you have your uniform on yet?"
"I still don't see why I have to be the referee." Mikan said evenly as she straightened her black and white striped shirt. "Couldn't you do this job just as well?"
"Well, I suppose I could," Shrugged Rito. "But then that would leave you with sucking the ghost into the Poltergust, and I honestly don't know how good of a repair job Lala did with it." He remarked sarcastically as he turned to show her the slightly shoddy patch job on the vacuum. "But, I suppose if you really want to risk being blown up..."
"When did you become so sneaky?" Mikan snarked as she walked by Rito, making sure to step hard on his foot as she passed.
"I'll let you know when I get the feeling back in my toes." Grunted Rito as he hopped about for a few more seconds, before testing his foot back on the ground. Turning up to the bleachers, he called out. "Mea! How are you and Nemesis doing up there?"
"Stay away from me, you psycho!" Shouted a blushing Nemesis as she cowered behind Mea, who was extremely confused at this turn of events. "How can you sleep at night, you monster?! I thought I'd seen the worst of everything, but then you go and prove me wrong! I hope you get lost in a swamp and drown!"
"What exactly did you do to my master, Rito?" Mea asked, slightly fearful of reprisal from both Nemesis and Rito.
"I went through four hours of ideas and energy meant for seven girls with one girl in thirty minutes." Rito explained, dancing around the question, while letting her know it was best not to ask the details. "Hey, when you have to please as many girls as I have to on a regular basis, you become too good for just one."
"A far cry from what the gossip columns say you're like." Nemesis scowled as she flipped Rito the bird. "To think, a living weapon of my caliber reduced to this pitiful state."
"For the record, you were more or less asking for it." Rito remarked nervously. "Maybe this will teach you to mind manners and and personal space."
"I will kill you one day, and dance on your grave with glee." Nemesis threatened. "I don't care what else happens, I will see you dead before long."
"Promises, promises..." Droned Rito, before cupping his hands over his mouth and shouting. "Ryoko, Peke! How is Oshizu coming along!?"
"She's not being very cooperative." Peke called from the hall. "Do you think we could have a few more minutes?"
"Alright, but please try to hurry." Rito answered. "Remember, if we don't grab this chance, there won't be another for weeks."
"Why would Oshizu be against this?" Lala asked her boyfriend. "This is to get Haruna to wake up, isn't it?"
"It is," Rito confirmed, scratching his cheek with a strained expression. "But given the serious cultural taboo we're trying to commit here, as well as Oshizu's old-fashioned roots, this is a bit of an uphill battle, even with the incentive."
"She's ready now, Rito!" Ryoko called as she peaked around the doorway.
"Well you sure settled her problems fast." Rito noticed as Ryoko walked backwards through the door, dragging something along with her. "Any particular reason you're wearing a bikini?" He asked nonchalantly.
"Well, Oshizu needed a little reassurance," Ryoko began, as Peke walked in, also wearing a bikini, and twiddling her fingers while glancing nervously at Rito. "So I agreed that we'd wear the same thing into the area."
Now Rito looked genuinely confused. "But this is a sumo arena, not a beauty pageant."
"Right, about that..." Ryoko smirked mischievously as she hoisted Oshizu around for all to see. "I didn't want to wear that embarrassing loincloth, so we compromised. What do you think of this cute little ball of blubber?"
'Little' was not the word that most would describe Oshizu as. At a morbidly obese 648 pounds, even her rolls had rolls. Her arms and legs were flabby, but they didn't fold over at the elbows and knees like most people at her weight would be like. Instead, the fat was evenly distributed all across her arms and hands, right down to her fingers, and her legs were shaped like broad ice cream cones, with beefy feet. Her cheeks were big, and her neck fat made her look like she had no neck at all. Her breasts were engorged, and her ass was huge. But her most prominent trait was how her belly fell halfway down her thighs like an apron. And her outfit consisted of nothing more than a blue bikini, and presumably a matching bottom.
Most would find her appearance repulsive, or at least a little off-putting, but Rito was just awestruck by how beautiful he found her.
'It's official, I'm one of the world's biggest perverts.' Rito thought despondently as he realized his attraction for one of the top contenders for fattest woman in the world. 'I'm going to make out with her once this is all done, no two ways about it.'
"I really don't want to wear something like this," Oshizu blushed as she tugged nervously as her bikini. "But I'm really, really against going in the sumo ring. It's a sacred area where only men are allowed, after all."
"But how else are we going to rescue Haruna?" Peke asked factually. "The last of the five ghosts anchoring the curse is a sumo, and Rito-dono said that his best chance of catching him is to have him lose in the ring."
"But why do I have to do it?" Oshizu asked, putting up more resistance than most would expect someone of her character to put up when helping a friend. "Why can't you find a boy who can do the job? Women have never been allowed in the sumo ring. It's an ancient tradition as old as the sport itself."
"That sexist tradition needs to be thrown out the window, at least for now." Yui scolded Oshizu. "Haruna is depending on all of us, and out of everyone here, you're the only one with the build to pass as a sumo."
Oshizu looked down at the ground, torn between centuries of tradition, and her desire to help her friend. Suddenly, Rito placed his hands on her shoulders, startling her into looking his dead-on with a blush on her fat cheeks.
"Oshizu," Rito began, his voice stern yet reassuring. "Whether you like it or not, you're the only one who can do this job. Everyone else has done all they can to save Haruna, sometimes even putting themselves at risk. I know you've already done so much in your efforts to help, but I'm asking, for Haruna's sake. Please just help us out a little more."
Oshizu stared wide-eyed at Rito for several seconds, before nodding in agreement. "Alright. I'm still upset about breaking centuries of tradition, but for Haruna's sake, I'll wrestle."
"Good to hear." Rito smiled as he pat her on the shoulder, enjoying the way his hand would sink into and jiggle her folds. "Now get in that ring and show him who's boss." Having said his bit, he got out of the way, and Oshizu walked into the ring.
For the next few minutes, Oshizu performed her part of the pre-match ritual, as did Mikan, as she was the referee. Everyone's eyes remained fixed on the ring, awaiting the arrival of her opponent. Suddenly, the ground began to quake, and a voice boomed through out the arena.
"WHAT WOMAN DARES TO SET FOOT IN THE RING!?" Demanded the deep voice angrily as a figure materialized opposite Oshizu in the ring. He was a large sumo, larger than even Oshizu, and he looked gravely offended and angry. "You do not belong here, woman!" He spat angrily. "This is a sacred arena, reserved only for TRUE sumo! Get out NOW!"
Oshizu recoiled in fear and disgrace slightly, before slapping her cheeks and reminding herself why she was here. Steeling her nerve, she got into the starting position for a match.
"What do you think you are doing?" The sumo asked angrily. "I will not wrestle you if that's what you're trying to do. Get out of the arena, now! Or I shall force you out!"
"I'd like to see you try." Oshizu glared, acting braver than she felt.
"You mean to try and trick me into fighting you?!" The sumo exploded in a rage. "There will be no fight, for I am far more powerful than a woman could hope to be! There will only be me disciplining a misbehaving little girl!" He made a grab for Oshizu, which Mikan took as her cue to officially begin the fight.
"RAAAHHHH!" Oshizu cried as she lunged into the sumo, throwing all her weight into pushing him out. The sumo recoiled slightly at the pressure, but even caught off guard, he was quick to retaliate with a shove of his own. With half a second, Oshizu and her opponent were engaged in a formal sumo match, in-spite of the sexist sumo's wishes.
"You dare force me to fight a woman in the arena!?" Demanded the sumo, more angry than ever before. "I shall show you your place!"
"I already know... where my place is..." Grunted Oshizu as she struggled against her heavier and more experienced enemy. "And that place... is doing whatever I can... to save my friend!" With a final great heave, she threw the sumo out of the arena, panting in exhaustion afterwards.
"This cannot be," The sumo gasped from his prone position on his back. "For me to be thrown out of the ring by a woman. This is the ultimate disgrace." Getting up with a roar, he shouted. "I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIIIIIIII-!" Which was all he managed to say, before being cut off by Rito drawing him into the Poltergust.
"And that's all she wrote." Rito smirked at the misogynist getting what he had coming, before directing the nozzle at Oshizu and hitting the reverse switch. "Alright, Oshizu! Say, 'ahhhhh'!"
"Ahhhh," Oshizu went happily as Rito fired the curse at her, Oshizu sucking up the energy with gusto. "As delicious as ever." She smiled before the smoke enveloped her, causing her to come out 108 pounds heavier than she was just moments ago. "Thanks for helping me focus on what was really important here, Rito." She smiled at him as she pat her apron-like belly.
"Don't worry about it." Rito said as he wrapped her in a big hug. "I'll just be happy when Haruna's awake, and we can put this whole crazy mess behind us."
"Yeah, when Haruna wakes up." Oshizu sighed, drifting away from the hug.
"Although," Rito smirked slyly, taking note of Oshizu's slight amount of sadness. "Things have been pretty crazy with all of us these past few weeks. None of us would even know where to begin without your help."
"I'm just doing what I can for my best friend." Oshizu shrugged. "Everyone else has put in a lot of effort too."
"True," Rito admitted as his harem began to surround them. "But something tells me that you deserve, and want, a little reward for yourself."
"What are you talking about?" Oshizu asked nervously as she took notice of how close everyone was getting.
"I'm talking about this." Rito answered her. And with that, he began kissing her. Starting off slow, nothing too serious, just to test the waters. But when Oshizu began getting into it herself, Rito dared to go in deeper. For a whole minute, they kept it up until they were forced to come up for air.
"Wow," Gasped Oshizu. "That was... wow."
"And there's a lot more where that came from." Smiled Ryoko as she kissed Oshizu for some lesbian action. "Rito's a little worn out from his time with Nemesis, but give him a few minutes and one of my stimulants, and I think we can get the initiation started."
"Initiation?" Oshizu asked curiously.
"You'll see," Momo smirked as the group began walking out. "You'll see."